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  1. #61
    F*cks Models tomboxah's Avatar
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    In the end the eye for an eye approach is a waste of energy.

    The best revenge in any scenario is success. To move on and actually outgrow the person or replace them with someone whom is better

    Killing etc. is extremely personal and generally would end up having you jailed. They still win in that scenario.

    In life people only have power over you if you let them. If you let these things bother you and act upon them, you blow it up into another meaning.

    World is a small place, and I have a sneaky giggle when I bump into previous ex-girlfriends with a gorgeous blonde falling off my arm.
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  2. #62
    It's Over 9000!!! rdferguson's Avatar
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    I don't think there's any circumstance in which adultery is a mature or morally valid behaviour. And if you're seeking revenge against someone you claim to love, then you don't know what love is. If someone cheats on you, they probably aren't in any fit state to be in a relationship with you. If want to get revenge against them, then why are you even in a relationship with them?

    If there's anything mature about your boyfriend's attitude, it's that he recognises that when others wrong you, it's not to be tolerated. However, that he thinks it's perfectly appropriate to go ahead and do what he regards as intolerable when someone else does it demonstrates that he does not think that the standards he holds others to apply to himself. There are legitimate conditions in which it's true that one party should be able to do things that another cannot, eg the judicial system have the authority to sentence and imprison felons, whereas the general public do not have this same authority, and society generally considers it better this way. However, your boyfriend does not have any special authority, which makes him a hypocrite for tolerating in himself what he finds intolerable in others.
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  3. #63
    ★I'm Your Huckleberry★ MysteriousNomad's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by randomsis View Post
    but he goes and flirts with an attractive girl to get back at me because according to his logic it's alright. does that make sense?
    He is using his energy to make u feel bad...instead he could be using it to communicate effectively with u.

    Why waste his time plotting for something negative?

    IMO its immature

  4. #64
    my shoes hurt Charuto222's Avatar
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    I dated a woman who had the same mentality as your bf OP and it was the worst relationship I've ever been part of. She became vindictive everytime I did something she didn't 100% agree with and was holding grudges against me over EVERYTHING. When I decided that I had enough and left her she then started trying to get back at me for leaving her by immediately hooking up with this guy who had been trying to get with her while we were together and texting me pictures of things like her bending over naked and grinding on him while he took a mirror shot on her phone...not really the most well thought out revenge as I could have easily used it against her but thinking things through wasn't really a strong point of hers when she got in one of her vindictive moods.

    Even though generalizing carries a stigma with it there is still a part of me that now writes everyone with your bf's mentality off as a psycho and tells me to just avoid them in all aspects of life. From where I stand they appear to live in an emotional abyss and you will never be able to pull them out, if you try it is far more likely that they will pull you in.
    They see indoctrination and they call it "morality", "professionalism", or "maturity" depending on the context.

  5. #65
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    Originally Posted by randomsis View Post
    Me and my boyfriend were in call when one thing lead to another and we got to this topic and my mind got completely blown. He thinks it's okay to get even with people and views it as mature.
    here are some examples he gave:

    EX1: say ur dating someone. they cheat on u. is it then considered mature on your part to go cheat on them to get even? and think it's justified cause the other person did it?

    EX2: someone kills someone in ur family and ur mad so u want to kill person. is it mature on ur part to find killer and kill him
    or report to police/fbi etc so they can get killer and either give death penelty or life in prison? which one is more mature?

    I personally think this is incredibly immature. I mean if someone killed someone in my family would i be fking raging? fck yes. would i do something stupid and put my self in harms way so i could either die or get captured? no.

    I need help idk if I'm viewing this one way or if there actually is other point of view which i just cant see.
    Did you cheat on him or did he cheat on you?

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