Hey everyone,
My name is Ryan I am 19 years old, 5' 11'' 250lbs with a body fat % of about 35. As you can tell I'm pretty far from being slim or built. I'm trying to educate myself and get into body building, the main reason for it is becuase i want to get healthy befor i join the air force next year. i have a gym membership but I have a problem that i'm hoping you guys can help me with.
Because of my weight i've been the center of jokes my whole time being in school which i think dramatically reduced my self esteem. so everytime i step into the gym, onto the treadmill for warm up, i cant seem to bring myself to go out into the free weight section with the other body builders around. i feel intimidated by them because they're so experienced and i havent touch a dumbell since moving it aside to make room for my xbox.
Has anyone ever been through this before? If i could get any advice on how to get over this intimidation and get in there and start lifting i would greatly appreciate it. thanks everyone!
|
-
04-22-2011, 09:30 PM #1
- Join Date: Apr 2011
- Location: New Jersey, United States
- Age: 32
- Posts: 12
- Rep Power: 0
How can i get over intimidation of the gym?
-
04-22-2011, 10:12 PM #2
When i see a big guy in the gym... i think good of the guy cause he's trying to get healthier.
i was the same way... no experience, low self esteem and social anxiety.
You will gradually get more experience... you will see new comers, come and go (usually they quit) the best thing is to find the thing that motivates you, picture of the body you want.... videos on bb's motivational section. You have to get the positive mindset to keep going and never quit.
i was 280lbs last year, now i'm at 210 with 12 % bf.
This video pumps me up.
Last edited by allkillano; 04-22-2011 at 10:17 PM. Reason: had to
I ATE A SPIDER AND I LIKED IT.
-
04-22-2011, 10:19 PM #3
-
04-22-2011, 10:23 PM #4
-
-
04-22-2011, 11:27 PM #5
-
04-23-2011, 12:47 AM #6
These feelings you have of intimidation come from the way you see yourself at the moment and how you see others in comparison to you. They seem to be powerfull feelings and this is why you gotta use these inner fears as fuel to fire your ambition. This may sound funny but the type of negatives feelings that people experience are really worth gold because they can fuel somoene to such an extent that they end up walking through walls so to speak. If it wasnt for this inner pain it would be much harder to achieve and to wanna get to a certain level so desperately.
So you just have to change your mindset abit man and use these feelings you have to push you. The most successfull people in the world im sure all had a deep feeling of inadequacy once upon a time that drove them to achieve what ever they achieved.
You will look back one day after you have made it, and realise that the reason why you pushed and pushed stemmed from a particular inner feeling you had about yourself.
So I think you should accept your inner fears and use them as fuel, wether your inner feelings are intimidation, or hurt from being teased or whatever it may be.......they will end up being your forcing guide.
-
04-23-2011, 12:56 AM #7
- Join Date: Feb 2008
- Location: Michigan, United States
- Age: 38
- Posts: 10,713
- Rep Power: 56691
I'm with every one else. I see a large guy in the gym I'm happy because the guy/girl is doing something about it. And people are (generally) there to work out so they aren't going to pay much more attention then that.
Bring your mp3 player with you and just listen to the kind of music that gets you pumped and keep to yourself if that helps you drown out the world around you.
Edit: We all started somewhere. Some of us exactly in your shoes, others in the exact opposite: super skinny with no muscle at all. Having some weight on you is actually better in my opinion because underneath all of the body fat is probably an already decently built guy.
-
04-23-2011, 01:47 AM #8
Everyone has to start some where on their journey. So, try not to be intimidated. Everyone mostly is focused on their own lives and workouts and often won't notice some of the other people. As you go in and are seen more and more, you'll just be one of the other gym rats =)
I wish you well, good luck.Men have two emotions: Horny and Hungry. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
-
-
04-23-2011, 02:38 AM #9
You are being intimidated about your fitness by people who's fitness likely isn't anything you can't outclass within a year of training. I don't know them so I can't be sure, but they're probably pretty close to average, because, well, almost everyone is; something else you'll notice is that few people ever really stray very far from "average" in many aspects of their lives, so they'll likely stay there too.
With a little dedication and fortitude behind your resolve to improve your health; you sir, are in a better position than they are.A man can only be beaten in two ways: if he gives up, or dies.
-
04-23-2011, 03:09 AM #10
-
04-23-2011, 06:01 AM #11
- Join Date: Jan 2008
- Location: Norfolk, Virginia, United States
- Age: 50
- Posts: 531
- Rep Power: 568
As all the above stated:
1.) Most normal BB and Fitness people are happy when we see "Big Guys" in the gym. Most of us where there and are really pulling for you to get to where ya wanna be. You would be suprised if you asked one of them questions how willing they would be to help. Trust me dude...we (most of us) have been there. Keep coming back and you will be the guy giving advice.
2.) Don't worry about what other people think...I know easier said then done...but use your fear as motivation to get back in there everyday. Gym's are kinda funny, the more you go back, the more people you talk to, the funner the workout =)
Good Luck man!
-
04-23-2011, 06:47 AM #12
- Join Date: Jul 2010
- Location: Houston, Texas, United States
- Age: 55
- Posts: 492
- Rep Power: 359
Hi Ryan, just wanted to share a quick perspective with you that I think may help. In my experience, most of the guys you're making note of are in the gym because they've made some kind of decision to improve themselves. It may be to elevate their own health, make themselves look better for the opposite gender, whatever. It doesn't even matter what their specific motivation is.
The ultimate thing they have in common is that they committed to that and stuck with it, even though it's a heckuva lot of work. If anyone is going to appreciate the value of putting in the work, it's *exactly* those guys.
I try to make it a point when I see a really young guy, or out-of-shape middle-aged guy that's obviously new to the gym to say "hey, nice pull" or something when I see them working their buns off. Nothing patronizing, just a little recognition to let them know I see them, and have been there. It's a "welcome to the club" kind of thing I guess.
I would imagine that the folks in your gym aren't much different.
-
-
04-23-2011, 09:46 AM #13
- Join Date: Mar 2011
- Location: Texas, United States
- Age: 32
- Posts: 648
- Rep Power: 261
I used to be the same way go into the gym and feel intimidated, In fact I quit going. But about 2 months ago said F this and got my happy ass back in there, but this time with a different attitude and it totally worked out. Now I just pop in my headphones and focus on what I came to do. I mean so what if people are starring at you..they're there for the same reason you are. To become a better person. So now get in the gym focus on what your doing and throw some heavy sh*t around!
-
04-23-2011, 02:05 PM #14
- Join Date: Jan 2011
- Location: San Diego, California, United States
- Age: 45
- Posts: 64
- Rep Power: 173
Maybe do the P90X program from the comfort of your own home, then after you finish the program you might feel confident enough to go back to the gym. By that time you should look and feel much better about yourself. Otherwise, you're just going to have to suck it up and face your fear. Good luck.
I dont know what OP means. I dont know what rep points are.
-
04-23-2011, 02:28 PM #15
-
04-23-2011, 04:02 PM #16
- Join Date: Jan 2008
- Location: Haverhill, Massachusetts, United States
- Age: 46
- Posts: 18
- Rep Power: 0
I was 30 years old at 300 lbs. I have a wife and two kids and something snapped at that point. All I could think of was "If I keep this **** up I'll never see my kids graduate high school." That's all it took for me, you have obviously found your motivation. Don't concern yourself with what you "think" other members thoughts are while you're in the gym. You've made the hardest decision already, you got your ass out of the chair and started moving. As long as you keep yourself motivated there's nothing and nobody that can stop you.
I've hit some road blocks on my way, losing my job took me out of the gym for four months and brought me right back to square one. I got back to it though and I don't see anything that will change that. I'm healthier than I've ever been, I can run harder and longer than I ever could in highschool and I'm almost into clothing sizes I've never been able to fit into.
I guarantee, you stick to it people are going to notice. Those gym members you felt intimidated by will give you that respective neck nod/thumbs up. I've had guys watch me on leg days and the very next day that group is doing my routine, which feels pretty friggin awesome. Keep at it, and never look back!
-
-
04-23-2011, 04:29 PM #17
Everybody goes through the phase of getting comfortable at the gym. It took me several weeks before I didn't even think about what other people saw me as.
Do what needs to be done. Once you get that body you want, you'll be the reason why other newcomers are afraid to use the gym.
and to those people who look down at you, fu(K them.
Welcome to the greatest opportunity to change your life forever.
-
04-23-2011, 05:31 PM #18
Everyone has insecurities and nobody goes to the gym to 'have a good body', theyre there to improve their body, and im sure quite a few people in your gym would have been heavy at some point in their lives. School is a lot different to the gym, school is for KIDS. Nobody is going to laugh at you in the gym, unless you tell a joke, everyone is at the gym for the same reason.
i hope you decide to go, it's not bad after the first couple of times.
-
04-23-2011, 06:49 PM #19
Focus on the task at hand. When I'm at the gym, I'm there to work out, I couldn't care less what others are doing. Come up with a regimen. Keep track of what you're doing (I write down everything). Focus on proper form. Think about how you feel after each lift. Re-rack weights. Go immediately from area to area (which you'll know because you'll have a plan regarding what you want to do). Generally, aside from a little downtime between sets, I'm always busy doing something related to lifting.
-
04-23-2011, 07:50 PM #20
- Join Date: Apr 2011
- Location: New Jersey, United States
- Age: 32
- Posts: 12
- Rep Power: 0
I acutelly have the Insanity program, i got through the first month and lost 15 lbs, but then got side tracked and never finished it. I'm getting P90X next month for my b-day so i'm really excited to start it, ill be doing that along with going to the gym for running.
Thank you so much everybody for all the advice. I went to the gym and thinking about what everyone said i finelly got into the weights and i didnt give a **** what anyone thought, and got a great pump afterwards. I'm new to this body building and its a whole new world to me, its just nice to hear such good things from experienced weight lifters. now my job is to get a regimen down, maybe a 5 day workout program. thanks everyone!!
-
-
04-23-2011, 09:15 PM #21
- Join Date: Jan 2008
- Location: Haverhill, Massachusetts, United States
- Age: 46
- Posts: 18
- Rep Power: 0
There are tons of posts through out these forums that can aid you in putting together a daily routine. Find something that works for you and attack it like it just slapped your mom. Just make sure to change it up every month or so,if the routine gives you a time frame follow it for that and then get a new one going. Good job on taking that first step to the free weights. Time to get the blood flowing and the calluses building.
-
04-24-2011, 06:43 AM #22
DO NOT resort to doing something at home because of your fear or intimidation. Now is the time to change, be bold and just do it. You will soon realize it's not a big deal, nobody is watching you. In the end, you will feel that much better for overcoming it and not just running away.
If you simply resort to working out at home because of your fears, you may see results, but you have already given in to the habit of giving up. Most important decision in life is if you will conquer your fears and succeed or accommodate to avoid them. That is the difference between a successful person and a failure.
I had the same fears in the beginning and I just said **** it and went. Now, I look around and wonder wtf was I scared of?:3
-
04-24-2011, 07:28 PM #23
-
04-24-2011, 11:17 PM #24
-
-
04-27-2011, 08:12 PM #25
I was in your shoes 2 years ago and I learned to focus on my goals and little by little I would incorporate lifting into my workouts at the gym, I did not care what others thought I was there for me! I put my earbuds in and do the work and am the better for it, my health is more important than any anxieties or insecurities I have about being around "bbers". After awhile, you don't really notice those things and if you are consistent you start seeing great results, don't sweat it.
-
04-27-2011, 08:44 PM #26
as some have said already, I'd do some free-lifting at home and get to a point where your happy with yourself and then take it to the gym. Besides, theres no reason for intimidation because your there to train.
~Change your routine, Change your life~
~You do your best when you've used up your weak--Saucony~
When you think you’re done you’re only 40% into what your body is capable of doing and that’s just the limits that we put on ourselves. - David Goggins
-
04-27-2011, 09:17 PM #27
-
04-27-2011, 09:18 PM #28
I see guys at the gym bigger than me, and I smile. Instead of them sitting on their asses, they're out there every day giving it their all. They aren't doing it to "pull hoes" or "keep dey sixers chisseled". They're doing it because they know they NEED to. They want it worse than anyone else, and if they're in the gym, they're making the sacrifices to get 'er done!!
Keep a journal. Write down your feelings, how certain exercises effect you VS others, weights/reps, milestones/Personal records, goals...
What works best for me is playing my loud, heavy music and in my mind, thinking I am the only one in the gym so it doesn't matter what everyone else looks like, what they're lifting...the only important person is ME.
Good luck, brah!GOAL: Be better than I am
"Don't look at yesterday. You can't change it. It happened. Don't look at tomorrow. It hasn't come yet. What you do today can make up for yesterday and completely change tomorrow. Work on today."
On training hard: "I train my hardest because one day, my life or the life of someone else may depend on it. I train like there is no tomorrow because one day, I may be in a situation where if I don't succeed, there will be no tomorrow."
-
-
04-27-2011, 09:29 PM #29
Man I know what you're going through since I was like you. But you just gotta go, and ask yourself why can they do it and I can't? You aren't different from them :/, and you gotta start somewhere right? So just go and don't care about what other people say, people are mainly there to make you feel like **** half the time, don't listen ignore them. I suck at motivational speaking so sorry for the ****ness :@
-
04-28-2011, 01:44 AM #30
There's already lots of good advice in this thread. My thoughts:
- don't overestimate how much people look at you, think something of you, care about what you do, in the gym (they are there to lift, just do your own thing)
- if people do think something about you, it's probably only positive. Like others said, kudo's for you for being there to take control of your life, that's what gets you respect man
I weighed 270lbs when I first walked in the gym, the guys in the weight area were intimidating. I kept to myself all that time, worked my ass of and focused on MY progress.
Today, I am one of the regulars, at 194lbs, looking better than 90% of people in there. I get respect from everyone in there who knows where I come from. Sometimes I walk in there, look in the mirror, and see what I have already achieved. Not that I am done (will we ever be?) but that feeling is simply amazing. Push through, get that victory, and earn your own respect. If its important to you: others will follow.Iron, sometimes it sets my teeth on edge, other times it helps me control the chaos.
++ Positivity Crew ++
Similar Threads
-
how can I get more energy in the gym?
By baseball91 in forum Product Reviews - Help Out!Replies: 1Last Post: 10-14-2007, 03:06 PM -
How do i get my friends to the gym
By linfieldfc in forum Teen BodybuildingReplies: 14Last Post: 08-11-2004, 02:20 PM
Bookmarks