Perkisizing for Perfection

[dtaps24]

lol @ trying to squat like an asian when you are a person

True, it doesn't work as well, maybe someday I will channel my inner Asian-ness.

Today I went to Quest, I knew I might not be recovered, this was confirmed when 295 felt heavy on bench and 335 was painfully slow. So, I stopped there, did some GHRs because my gym doesn't have one of those, and watched Judge and Torrtre hit some geared squats which looked impressive to me but I don't really understand. Was a fun time, great to meet up with people from on here in real life, I recommend doing that whenever possible if you don't already. I am going to make a very very slight modification to my programming for the next couple months in order to maximize my practicing of the squat because I will never have the Total I want with a sub-500 squat and my form is clearly my biggest limiting factor on all my lifts but especially that one.

[dtaps24]

That's right.

Squats
45x5
135x5
225x5
275x5
315x5, some of these are borderline but I don't much care, they're far enough down that I'm getting the work and I will just go deeper when it counts, really trying to force the hip break by presetting instead of creating my arch on the way down, felt alright



Bench 5-3-1 Day knew going in this might be iffy with the 335 yesterday and 335 Incline on Wednesday afternoon
275x5
315x3
345xmiss, misgrooved really badly and tried to pause couldn't lock
350x1, closeish grip no lift, still drifted back and had to manuever around the pins, epic grinder, going to chalk it up to a bit of overcookedness and not freak out.

Closegrip
225x5 and then epic shoulder pain

Pushdowns of death I need to get jacked tris since I need to be able to push the bar in a straightish line or else by shoulder flips the **** out
single arms 20x10 under then 10 over
30x10U,10O
40x10U,10O
60x10 with tricep rope
90x10 with straight bar underhand
120x10 with straight bar overhand
150x10 with V-bar

Notes
Shoulder felt pretty pucky, and bench was a ****show. Will be repeating this day next week with better (ie. any) recovery. Squats felt a bit more better.

[dtaps24]

Cube Method RE Day. Disclaimer, I did not do the recommended RE, but I did reps, I felt sore today in my hamstring region, I don't have muscle there so that was odd, probably the whole Squa+GMst/GHR/Squat thing. Almost just did bis and pulled tomorrow but then I decided I'd just as soon get it over with because this week is weird with Halloween and stuff so on to the workout

Deads
135x5, some 45 degree hypers
225x3, """"""""
315x3, add belt after
405x3, add chalk, bar was slippery as a greased pig, I love greasing pigs,
495x3, easy enough had at least one more, probably at least 30 more lbs. for a triple, but people were bothering me and I was done, probably shoulda kept going but I didn't wanna

Hammer Row light to take it easy on my elbow which was feeling weird
2ppsx20
3ppsx15
4ppsx12, unilateral

Spider Curls
10psx15
20psx12
30psx10

Done. Took about an hour. That's about right for today, I didn't have a whole lot more and I didn't overdo it. Yay me.

[dan_g_28]

GJ on not over doing it. Srs.

[dtaps24]

GJ on not over doing it. Srs.

Thanks man. What I did was run an algorythm into a formula I developed on a spreadsheet on a computer that takes seemingly random variants and plots them into a scatter plot/pie chart that I then calculate based on the phase of the moon and the way that Saturn and Mars are juxtaposed, this then told me I was really ****ing tired and to pat myself on the back for the idiots at the gym asking how I got so strong and go home and play with my kids.

Today I accumulated lots of fatigues with my new pants that match my new shoes on with a John Deere shirt. This shirt really breathes so I can get some volumization in and when I time my rest periods so that I can then pattern my recovery in combination with my protein intake, insulin levels, and see at which angle Orion's belt is reflecting against the middle handle star in the big dipper it results in an exponential hypertrophic effect.

Bench Press by cross stimulating the neuromuscular pattern in my broad powerful pectoral muscles and really trying to fire through with my triceps (primarilly the femoral head) I am hoping to really activate my stabilizer muscles and create dynamic speeds that will allow me to train in and through the zone where a normal human being would die. I will not because I am not normal. But you already knew that.
135x5
225x5
265x5
295x5, hit the right upright 4 times, can't maintain a bar bath for nothin, paused the last rep to avoid the rack and be awesome. I only accomplished one of those two goals and I think we all know which one that is

Incline first and last reps paused, by attacking the muscle from a different angle it allows for extra expansiveness of the rib cage which creates a better shelf off which to push, I think that the extra slabs of big beefy muscle should shorten my ROM while maintaining my athletic physique through cardio and really dialing in my diet. Also I think I should spray tan before my next max day. Seems to help with confidence and expanding your mind
225x5
255x5
280x5

SMPOCISM just straight weight listed last rep paused like a big bear taking a dump, if you've never seen it they pause for awhile
110x5
140x5
180x5

Rope Pushdowns
50x10
60x10
70x10
80x10
90x10

Facepulls evening out my push to pull ratio will make my shoulder stop being a bitch. I've smacked that bitch up by benching 3x in the last 4 days, no it's time to build it back up
40x10
50x10
60x10

Cable Crossovers high to low, no rest, just pulling the pins and going, bringing a great deal of blood into the area it will speed my recovery
40x10
60x10
80x10
100x10
60x10, that Time Under Tension.

I think I've got lifting figured out. If you want to Skype with me about it just PayPal me 100 dollars in advance and I will make a presentation in powerpoint. For an extra 200 I will tailor it to you specifically. For 500 total I will do it shirtless. You're all welcome.

[KevinAlvarez123]

wtf did I just read

[dan_g_28]

wtf did I just read

lmao...

[dtaps24]

wtf did I just read

Did you read it, or did you READ it?

Good job on your Meet bro brah I know you didn't hit what you wanted but you'll kill it next time. Also, that kid that looks like a jacked DBC on your team is retortedly strong.

[gfoutris]

Did you read it, or did you READ it?

Good job on your Meet bro brah I know you didn't hit what you wanted but you'll kill it next time. Also, that kid that looks like a jacked DBC on your team is retortedly strong.

thanks brah

[dtaps24]

thanks brah

Yeah man you did really good cept Pull, that'll come round soon. I was gonna post in your log but didn't. I think I forgotted

[dtaps24]

I've eaten even worse than usual this week, so I've put on some of not so good weightage. Oh well I'll tighten up next little bit.

Hammers
30s, 40s, 50sx10

Spiders just straight weight
20, 30, 40x10

Facepulls
40, 50, 60x10

Rope Cable Hammer Curls
60x10x3 sets

25 mins.

[dtaps24]

Cube Day DE

Squats didn't get wide enough. Realized it today. Also felt a bit underrecovered
225x2
275x2
295x2
315x2
335x2 for some reason this didn't get videod I really dunno why
355x2
375xpause squat

narrowed stance
225x2
275x2
315x2, only set of the day that felt good
335x2, and we're back to sucking might as well end the way you started



I need to get wider. Too much Taps not enough Wong. If I had a nickel for every time I heard that I'd be a rich man.

[slothguy]

Those were some uggggly lookin squats. Too much knee, not enough hip. Strong benchin'

[dtaps24]

Benching was bull****. I hated this workout and everybody in the gym watching it. I hate typing it up but am going to as punishment for performing like a sissy mary bull**** cocksucking ***got. I hate my shoulder and my form and ****ing everything related to what I've been doing lately. It's been a big pathetic pile of monkey****. I have tried to ignore it, tried looking at what works for other people, tried to be "smart," and a bunch of other ****ty ****ing ideas. Meanwhile I've been an ******* by ignoring my recovery, shoulder health, and other factor limitations which is ****ing retardedly bull****.

Bench paused
275
315, slow at the top and no decent spotters to be found so I decided I would rep out 315
315x2, the first rep was fine the second fired into the rack and a third mighta completely separated my shoulder. What a ****ing joke. Why the Hell have I been benching twice a week like a ****ing *******? Because I'm a ****ing *******. Stop asking stupid ****ing questions of yourself and fix it.

Floor Press
135x5
185x5
225x10 shoulder hurt racking it but what****ingever

Seated Military in Smith just straight weight
90x5
140x5
180x8

Seated Dip in Hammer
90x15
180x10
270x10

Notes
I am going to be making some changes and in order to stop sucking ****ing cock at lifting weights.

[dtaps24]

ME Day

Deads
135x5, 45 hypers BWx5
225x1
315x1
495x1
555x1
585xf, missed above my knees because I couldn't get my hips through because my form is poor and I am weak. Other than that everything went great.

Bent of Rows
2 of 5 at 225 Pendley strict
225x10 not Pendley, fairly strict until the last one or two

Chin ups
BWx20, missed the last one from a dead hang, usually can do 2 or 3 from a dead hang but I am weak.

Notes
Started carb backloading today. So that's why I sucked. That and I'm weak. On the bright side I probably won't have to upload videos for awhile since I suck and am weak. Sweet.

[dan_g_28]

Im here for you, Dustin. And always will be.

[LegosInMyEgos]

carb backloading is scam, maybe thats why.

[dtaps24]

Im here for you, Dustin. And always will be.

Thanks real Dan G. I didn't wanna bring this up, but that woman touching me on the butt and insisting on giving me her number under circumstances that would've been impolite to decline really made me uncomfortable. Then while I was laying on the ground with the kids before they fall asleep, the little dog started barking at the front door. When I went down the stairs to have my carb up there was poop there. Now I'm going to have a good cry in the tub then I'll give you a call and we can talk about our feelings. Why is this happening to my body?

carb backloading is scam, maybe thats why.

Yeah I think it's more that I'm weak but possibru.

[dtaps24]

Incline Bench
45x10
135x5
225x3, closegrip
275x3, finger out from close
315x3, POR, feel almost as strong as I used to be for once

Tates
30s, 40s, 50sx10

Preacher DB Hammer Curls
25s for 4 sets of somewhere in the neighborhood of 10 reps, whenever I was satisfied with how my arm looked in mirror

After this workout I was cock diesel. If you don't know what that means you better axe somebody.

















P.S. Do any of you guys know what "cock diesel" means? When people call me it in the gym it makes me very uncomfortable.

[arian11]

Do you got a name for this program you wrote for me? Someone's gotta come up with a cool name I can use in my log.

[dtaps24]

Do you got a name for this program you wrote for me? Someone's gotta come up with a cool name I can use in my log.

I'll put my people on it.

[arian11]

I'll put my people on it.

Yea, I'll be spending time at work trying to come up with a name.

[dtaps24]

Yesterday had strained something in the bottom of my neck/between my shoulder blades with my Incline so I did
Chest Pulls- Facepulls to the Chestx10-3sets
Straight Arm Pull Downs with rope 10x3
Standing Rope Ab pulldowns 10x3
Rope Cable Curls 10x3

Today

Squats trying to get wide and push knees out more
45x5
135x3
225
275, at this point I had to leave the rack I was in that I like okay to the really crappy one because two merry gents on the lighter side of life smelled so horrible that I couldn't stand it
325, worksets
365x3
385x3

Pause Squats narrower still trying to push knees out
225, 275, 315x3

Good AMs
135,185,235x5



Thoughts
Lots of borderline reps in the worksets but I don't care, getting used to being a little wider, might've gone too wide on 365 and been about right on 385. Only upset about the last rep with 385. Pauses felt good, GMs were fine real deep and ****

[dtaps24]

Going to the Cube for Bench as well

Bench v. Mini rotated close, POR, IOR
135x3x3
185x3x3
225x3x2, only close (which felt weird in mah sholder) and IOR

RE Bench Index on Ring was going to do floor press or closegrip but since close felt weird on my last DE set and I have to go close to floor press due to crappy rack I figured I'd do what didn't hurt
135x5
225x5
275x5
315x4 and a touch, lost my path on first rep, shoulder felt weird and form went to **** as a result, I'm hoping this was more fatigue that sucktitude but definitely a combination of the two, we'll see what happens next week

Incline Hammer Strengf I strained whatever I had strained doing Incline Wednesday on my last bench set, had to adjust accordingly
ppsx5
2ppsx5
3ppsx15

Hammer seated Dip
2psx8
4psx8
6px15

Pushdownapulooza
20x10 per arm reverse grip
30xditto
40xditto
50x10 per arm overhand

90x10 Rope Pushdown ss 50x10 Rope Extension

[dtaps24]

Since I am going to full blown cube this is the only day that won't be in order. This was RE day:

Deads the whole point was to flatten out my back I couldn't have failed more miseably
135x5, 45 degree hyper
225x3, """""""""""""""""
315x3
405x3
495x3
525x2, probably had the 3rd but my form was going to absolute ass and my hands hurt, the 10-20% chance of missing didn't justify grinding out a triple 20 lbs. under my best.


Fustercluck of pulling
Romanians- 225x5
a Sumo pull at 275

Speed Deads from a 3.5-4 inch deficit- 15 seconds rest between reps 3 singles with 325, was going to do 6 but my wife called in the middle
Romanians- 325x8

Hammer Row Machine
ppsx20
2ppsx20
3ppsx15

That was it, took awhile. Deleted all the videos but it was heinous. I feel so uncoordinated right now. I need to get better.

[dtaps24]

part 1, today was scheduled to be abs, calves, cardio, but I train by raw animal magnetism and basic instinct when I'm at my best.

Seated Calves noticed that the people benching like **** were having more fun than me and strutting around, then invisiboard benching 205 lbs. and still having fun
p-5psx10 going up a plate at a time

Rope Facepulls ss Rope Ab Pulldowns why are those ****ers having so much fun and I'm doing this stupid **** and have to do cardio still? I feel pretty good today, and I don't want to be here if this is the **** I have to do
40,I could consider doing a set or two, 60,two sets and if they feel bad I'll just stop, can't hurt, 80x10, **** this I wanna lift

Closegrip Incline first and last rep pause
135, 225, 275x5 had another couple few

Sit ups
3x10

Free Motion Chest Machine kinda a hybrid fly press motion
3x10

Pronating Pull Downs
3x10

Cable Cross Overs high to low
40, 60, 80x10

Scarecrow
20, 30, 40x10

Leg Reaises
3x10

This workout was so sick. You don't even know. Did this all backloaded 20g net carbs too. What a stud.

[arian11]

Watched Heavyweights this past weekend, funny stuff. Ben Stiller's performance reminds me of Dodgeball.

[KevinAlvarez123]

Nice inclines

I am thinking of doing them a bit more regularly. Do you think they've helped you?

[dtaps24]

Watched Heavyweights this past weekend, funny stuff. Ben Stiller's performance reminds me of Dodgeball.

Yeah, it's better IMO but the character is pretty similar. I think Heavyweights is the greatest movie of alltime though.

Nice inclines

I am thinking of doing them a bit more regularly. Do you think they've helped you?

Ya. I like em. Best way to hit my shoulders without sending my shoulder into the toilet and/or compromising my recovery. I think they carryover really well. My Incline is consistently 20-40 lbs. below my bench. Most people with decent form will have a bigger disparity but I think it's an underused lift. Plus it gives me a sweet hypertrophy pump in my pecsors of gold.

[dtaps24]

Cube boodybalding day part deaux

Rotary Calves
2ps-5psx10

JM Presses last rep floated about 2 inches above my chin (TWSS)
135x5
185x5
225x5
245x8, somebody call the po po because a handsome jacked bald man is killing Shiite (no Arian murder)

Preacher Curls with easy curl bar only straight weight listed
50x10
60x10
70x10
80x10

Rope Pushdowns
80, 90, 100, 110x10

Rope Curls
60x10
80x10
100x10
120x10, drop 100x8, drop 80x10, drop 60x12, drop 40x15, drop 20x20, that's about a billion reps if you add it up

Seated Ab Machine
2x10, 1x30

Donezos, I'm stronger when I workout uncarbed I've decided so perhaps I will continue this CBL nonsense. I'm also JAFC. I'm out.