Valetntine Reasons why we guys can't live without you girls

[Jackedtech]

nferior gender that doesn't invent or discover things, save for perhaps Original Sin and sandwiches. It has been scientifically proven that women have smaller brains than men, and as such women are to be treated like sex-objects as porn has reminded us. They exist only to forfil four functions: cooking, cleaning, ****ing, and looking after babby.

Communicating with a woman

To avoid wasting time making pointless attempts to have logical, intellectually satisfying verbal communication with women, three basic communication techniques depicted here are enough:



Fights with women

Women have "evolved" to have verbal fights with men, so that they can either feel powerful, try to deny a man his rightful use of her vagina or simply because they like drama, losing battles and being revenge-****ed. An interesting article goes on about the many ways men might try to fight back with women. Although all men know the proper way is to tell her once. If that doesn't work, send that sassy *kekšė* flying into the kitchen with a swift **** punt. Once in the kitchen, she will feel obliged to build you a sandwich.

- Be an *******: The last thing a woman wants and deserves is respect. If you think women give a **** about personality, you clearly haven't been around one before (your mother doesn't count, she just pretends to give a **** about you because she knows that she'll have to deal with you for the rest of her life).

- Looks are everything: If you don't look like an androgynous celebrity that's 30 pounds underweight, you'll never get a woman. Lose some weight and get a sense of fashion. Every woman and gay man's first impression is based on the total retail value of the clothes that a person is wearing. If you don't know what clothes to wear, read any "romance" book. Before anything "romantic" happens on said books, the author will always, always, describe the clothes that the hero and heroine are wearing in precise detail.

- During dates, once again, be an *******: Before a woman becomes willing to have sex with you, you must convinced her that you are a natural leader. Since you aren't, pretend that you are for at least the 20 first dates. If you don't, she will run off with someone with actual muscles and a fat wallet (all women will **** anything that pays).

- During sex, remember, women don't like anal sex, they love it. The more a woman screams and tells you to stop, the better you are at pleasing her!


Normal Behaviors of women and dealing with them

Once you have found a suitable piece of property, you will need to know about certain attributes they possess, in order to best keep your *kekšė* in line.

- Women have zero self-understanding or self-awareness. They are only slightly less deep than a piece of paper and as reliable as a paranoid schizophrenic.

- As a result, nothing a woman says is ever true or good or honest. Any agreement or promise made by a woman will probably be broken by the woman herself in a fit of PMS-rage.

- Women may look inside your wallet or any other place they suspect you may have money. You have to nip this in the bud and tell her if you catch her doing this, you will **** punt her.

- Beware. If she finds anything there, she will be offended. Women feel that anything yours is theirs by right, to the point that it's morally wrong for you to have anything of your own.

- Women may want to watch lifetime channel. BEWARE! If you let them watch this, they may think they're a victim! Dispose of this channel by any means necessary.

-Women are like children and need structure and discipline. They will try to get away with as much as they can, and it is your job to stop them.

- Women are constitutionally incapable of paying attention to what men say during a conversation. They are only able to pay attention to their own feelings and needs, so if you're a masochistic freak and want to talk to a woman, expect her never to reciprocate or have any concern about you or your life.

- On the other hand, women typically require perfection from any man they talk to, expecting royal treatment and total attention and sympathy. As such, talking to women most closely resembles a never-ending job interview rather than a conversation.

- If they are of the "educated" / "clever" -breed, they might crave oddities like *rights* (naturally without any obligations attached to those rights) or *power* (naturally without responsibility for the mayhem they cause). (Hmmm...this just happened to you? Sorry, can't help bro'. You're screwed. She is the secretary of state now.)

- Women are natural freeloaders. Get used to never being appreciated for anything.

- Partly a result of a bone-deep sense of entitlement, discipline them if they show or have any signs of showing or developing this cancer to mankind.

- For women, the sole litmus test for whether any given action is good or bad is their personal feelings related to the issue at hand. As such, women always believe they are right, for the simple reason that they wanted to do whatever they did in the first place.

- Women also get hyperjealous of anything that brings a man pleasure that is not them (although they deny access to the pleasures they have to offer, that is, hole 1, hole 2 or hole 3). For this reason, they are a leading cause of homosexuality.

- Women NEVER take responsibility for their actions. As such, they are incapable of guilt or remorse, because they never believe they have done anything wrong.

- Contrary to the claims of feminists, women are stunningly incapable of empathy. Being both unwilling and unable to put themselves in others' shoes, women effortlessly create drama wherever they go.

- Some women are fans of such boring activities as women's sports (known to the Jews as girl's sports), and they may try to drag you to such events. In such cases, a **** punch or *kekšė* slap is in order.

- If you want to piss a (hot) woman off then the best way to do this is simply just ignore her. Even though a hot woman would never **** you because you're a loser, she still gets mad because she thinks she deserves the attention because she's hot. Women hate it when guys ignore them.

- Their ongoing mission is to train you. Having no internal life of their own, they have all the time and attention in the world to spare making your life hell. Remember: the measure of a woman's self-worth is that nobody around her is allowed to be any happier than she is, that said it is best to treat her as shallow as is implied by her PMS induced femrage so she doesnt ruin your day ALL the time until you are ready to dominate that *kekšė*.

- Women from more traditional cultures, like Asia and the Middle East, are likely to be much better behaved than what is detailed above, due to the relative absence of feminism and brainwashing by the media. Heck, some of them are even fun to be around.


Things women will do to you

More dangerous than they look,dont let the following happen to you.

- Take half of your income (and many others) despite not working a day in their lives.
- Half? Only Half? BWAHAHAHA! Dream on, brother.
- Kick you in the balls without any legal repercussions. (Women love doing this and will try to do it at every chance they get)
- Legally cut your dick off in your sleep, blame rape, then throw it in some field at 2am.
- Trick you into getting a RapeX stuck to your cock, frame you for rape, and then get voluntarily gang-raped by ******s.
- Betray you in the worst ways imaginable just for ****s and giggles.

[nonamewut]

0_0

[HoratioC]

You came off as desperate brah. Srs.

[norinicole]

Cliffs?

[nvrstopworking]

Cliffs?

OP is irate... and lonely on Valentines Day.

[Keltron]

Cliffs?

OP hasn't had pu$$y since pu$$y had him.

[Simpy]

It got off to a good start, and I enjoyed a few giggles. But I lost interest quickly. I blame my small brain.

[latebloomingmom]

I am a woman...I refuse to read that unless I am paid to do it..

[Swannvictoria]

I didn't read past the first paragraph. Actually genius, while men have a larger amygdalae and hypothalamus, women have a larger hippocampus and caudate than men. And while your brain may be 10% bigger overall, the female brain has more nerve cells and cellular connections, making our thinking more efficient and effective. Just an FYI.

[ahmedaz]

I didn't read past the first paragraph. Actually genius, while men have a larger amygdalae and hypothalamus, women have a larger hippocampus and caudate than men. And while your brain may be 10% bigger overall, the female brain has more nerve cells and cellular connections, making our thinking more efficient and effective. Just an FYI.

sisscience ftl

[stephanielynn76]

tl,dr