"Self-Improvement's masturbation. Now self-destruction..." Zewski's Recomp/Bulk

[tswdan]

Franks + Mustard = the bomb

[Zewski92]

Franks + Mustard = the bomb

o_0

MUST TRY THIS!

[Zewski92]

Ok so I'm pretty sure that my FFB syndrome is kicking in again. I stepped on the scale this morning and weighed in at 155! Now i know that this is a "bulking log", but I only weighed around 152 just last week.

There's a couple things that go into this though. Yesterday was a high cal day were as last time I weighed myself was after a rest day, so there's that. Next I'm still not "regular" yet so let's just say I got some extra baggage.

I've definitely lost some definition, but that was expected. And i certaintly don't feel five pounds fatter since I've started. Plus, I've definitely gotten stronger so I'm adding at least a little muscle. Either way, I just need to nut up and keep going and see how things go for a bit longer, before I freak out and change things diet-wise

[Zewski92]

WORKOUT

PUSH (OH Press)

Standing OH Press
120x6 (rep PR!!!)
110x7
100x8
Def getting stronger on these!

Decline Bench (~70%)
180x8 *Tougher than expected
165x9
155x12
*I never used to do this as a second exercise, but I've decided to just use two pushing movements and just cycle which one I hit first and heavy. Less exercises means I can track strength gains better.

Incline DB Flyes
50x12
40x15

DB Lat Raise
25x10
15x20 *my 25's were taken :\
12.5x10 *on Cable

Tri Rope Push-Down
52.5x20 *for some volume, realized it was pointless stopped at one set

Push-up
BWx25 *for Gits & Shiggles

Static Pec Stretch
70x1'' *DC-Stlye, gotta use lighter DB's next time

Then a bunch of shoulder traction with a band, and some shoulder dislocation since I've used barely any recovery techniques this year. Something I did a lot least year. Plus, I had the time so why not?

DIET

Cals 2582
Fat 73
Carbs 295
Protein 193

Meal 1 (PWO)
Turkey Breast w/tomats and lettuce. Topped with hot sauce/spices
4 Packets instant oats (brown sugar flavor) topped with light whipped cream
The most delicious cookie known to man!

Meal 2
2 packets of apple cin. instant oats with 4tbsp's of PB and some psyllium husk. This was amazingly tasty

I also had a big bowl of chinese take-out steamed chicken and brocc. It came with brown sause on it, but i tried my best to wash it off in the sink although it was inevitably still on there, so I probably ate more than the cals I listed. I could have tried harder to make it so that there was no sauce left, but I'm trying to not be too OCD and follow the 80/20 rule and realize **** happens.

UPDATE
Taken 2 days ago

[tswdan]

Ok so I'm pretty sure that my FFB syndrome is kicking in again. I stepped on the scale this morning and weighed in at 155! Now i know that this is a "bulking log", but I only weighed around 152 just last week.

There's a couple things that go into this though. Yesterday was a high cal day were as last time I weighed myself was after a rest day, so there's that. Next I'm still not "regular" yet so let's just say I got some extra baggage.

I've definitely lost some definition, but that was expected. And i certaintly don't feel five pounds fatter since I've started. Plus, I've definitely gotten stronger so I'm adding at least a little muscle. Either way, I just need to nut up and keep going and see how things go for a bit longer, before I freak out and change things diet-wise

I went from 148 to 162 in a week. Dropped back down to 157, now at 158. Don't sweat it man. Just think how completely jacked you're going to be in the long run. This isn't a sprint baby, it's a marathon. You're gonna put on that mass like I am and then shredded as **** come next spring. Keep your mind right. STRENGTH BABY, STRENGTH!

Keep up the solid work man and keep fighting those demons. I gotcha' back.

[lunchboy]

I went from 220-235 when I went to maintenance cals (around 3.5k per day for me). Was eating an average of 2.5k per day for months with no weight loss. Now my weight has dropped back to around 230-231. Just stay the course dude. I struggle with FFB as well big time. I'm gonna stick with this cal level till next week and watch my weight. If no increase in weight after this I'm going to restart my cut. That and the fact I got diagnosed with a thyroid condition so hopefully my weight loss will be on track for the first time in my life now that I have medication for my thyroid.

[ErikTheElectric]

I would say don't worry about it at all bro. Honestly, just weigh yourself under the same conditions, 1x per week.
Salt and carb intake play such a huge part in weight, its better to just weigh yourself at the same time in the morning after your BM.

Your doing great man, just keep it up.

[Zewski92]

I went from 148 to 162 in a week. Dropped back down to 157, now at 158. Don't sweat it man. Just think how completely jacked you're going to be in the long run. This isn't a sprint baby, it's a marathon. You're gonna put on that mass like I am and then shredded as **** come next spring. Keep your mind right. STRENGTH BABY, STRENGTH!

Keep up the solid work man and keep fighting those demons. I gotcha' back.

I would say don't worry about it at all bro. Honestly, just weigh yourself under the same conditions, 1x per week.
Salt and carb intake play such a huge part in weight, its better to just weigh yourself at the same time in the morning after your BM.

Your doing great man, just keep it up.

I went from 220-235 when I went to maintenance cals (around 3.5k per day for me). Was eating an average of 2.5k per day for months with no weight loss. Now my weight has dropped back to around 230-231. Just stay the course dude. I struggle with FFB as well big time. I'm gonna stick with this cal level till next week and watch my weight. If no increase in weight after this I'm going to restart my cut. That and the fact I got diagnosed with a thyroid condition so hopefully my weight loss will be on track for the first time in my life now that I have medication for my thyroid.

Thanks for all the support guys it means a lot! I rarely weigh myself to be honest but just did it today for ****s and giggles.

I just gotta focus on gaining strength (which is happening ) and gettin jacked and accept the fact that my abs will blur a bit. With everyone following here I know it'll happen, thanks again guys!

[vitornoob]

Do not worry, man

Do not low calories untill 2-4 weeks, could be water, glycogen, food, a lot factor, just make sure about it after 2 or 4 weeks

You are under a low calorie diet, probably you ****ed up your metabolism, just wait a bit....

[Zewski92]

THURSDAY 9/23/11

So hopefully I'll be able to get this log up to date instead of a day behind. Probably won't happen for a while haha

WORKOUT

Lower (Squat)

Squat
185x10,9,10
* As I've stated before, my squat is by far my weakest lift IMO and last week I did a 3x5 set-up with 195, but the reps were ugly. Idk whether it was just the lighter load or if I've gotten much stronger (due to upping cals), but the squats looked a lot better yesterday. However, my right leg kept shooting in on the way up during the last reps of the last set, but I was set on getting ten Either way I think I'll keep the lighter load/higher reps for squats. It seems that when I try to go heavy my form breaks down too easily. Either way I've definitely improved from last squat session.

SLDL
230x8x3
*Seemed to actually feel these more in my back than hammies, at least when I was doing them. However, I'm definitely feeling them today #swollstroll

Cable Crunch
82.5x8x2
*lowered weight to keep hip flexors out of the movement

DB Lunge
55x10 (per leg)
I was pressed for time so i tried to do a unilateral movement that kind of hit both quad and hams. Except I found lunges to be a bit too awkward so I only did one set of these

Bulgarian Split-Squat
55x6
* it was at this point that I realized that I'm very uncooridinated (at least when I'm tired). Also I was shot from sldl's and squats so I kept it to one set. Surprising I felt this movement the most in my glutes, which is good since I've recently realized that I don't have an ass. Strange for a guy to say I know, but it doesn't make it less true.

One-legged Calf Raise in smith
35persidex8x2

Well Squats were good. Gotta say I'm starting to love leg workouts. They're the only workouts where I actually sweat and feel really drained (in a good way). Hopefully my squats will continue to improve from here!

DIET

Cals 2594
Fat 66
Carbs 317
Protein 188
* I realize that this isn't the ideal macro spread, but I literally ran out of protein sources :\ gotta stock up on chicken tits today

So with the advice of a trusted source I'm actually going to up the cals by 150 each day, bringing me to 2750/2350 this is by far the most I've ever bulked on so hopefully things go well. Only, time will tell.

Enough writing its FRIDAY! you know what that means http://www.leangains.com/2010/07/tru...nd-muscle.html

[Zewski92]

FRIDAY 9/25/11

Well basically yesterday was off on all accounts. I knew i would be drinking so I followed a PSMF-type diet during the day (lots 'o chicken tits) ate over 200g's of protein and nothing else. And plenty of rum during the night So needless to say it was kind of a break from tracking and just enjoyed myself for the night.

[Zewski92]

SATURDAY 9/24/11

WORKOUT
none, but a lot of walking around campus

DIET

Cals 2425
Fat 74
Carbs 251
Protein 200

So Ive upped the cals, and while i realize that I've expressed some concern as to weight gain/getting sloppy, I realize that I'm barely at maintenance with my cal levels right now (considering my age, weight, activity level). I've seen plenty of people with almost my exact build (on here and on blogs elsewhere) that have bulked somewhere around 3000-4000 cals daily. So I'm definitely not gonna lower the cals anytime soon.

I'm gonna have to agree with VITOR's guess that my metabolism may be a little ****ed from all the dieting I've done in the past. So I'm just gonna nut up and keep at it till my body gets back up to speed.

Some eats:
tasted better than it looked

[Zewski92]

SUNDAY 9/25/11

Weight: 155.2

WORKOUT
Pull

Chins
+40x7
+27.5x7
+10x8
BWx8

DB Row
85x9x3

"Stretchers" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hWBC...layer_embedded)
120x12,10
100x10

Power-Shrugs
315x12,10

DB curl
30x15

Rope Hammer Curl
52.5x10

Rear-Delt Flye
25x15
*felt an uncomfortable tinge in my right rear-delt so kept it to one set.

Reverse Curl
42.5x15
*for gits and shiggles

Band Pull-apart
Red Minix15x2

DC Back Stretch
+90 for about 1:00

DIET

Cals 2,741
Carbs 306
Fat 70
Protein 212

Meal 1
Turkey w/quaker rice snacks, Instant Mashed Taters w/ketchup, 2 Lender's mini-bagels w/grape jelly and cream cheese

Meal 2
7oz. Lean Beef and Brocc with hot sauce and ketchup, 8 steamed pork dumplings
Skinny Cow

Definitely don't mind eating big. Although my chins seemed to be stalling I think I'm due for a deload/ramp-up soon (maybe in 1-2 weeks), afterwards I think I may switch to 5/3/1. I've used it in the past with good strength gains, plus I like the fact that having a set-up plan takes out the guess work. Although I'm sure that I'll find a way to complicate things :P

[Zewski92]

9/26/11

So yesterday I spent basically the entire day in the waiting room of the ER. My mom thought it would be a good idea to check out what the cause of my constipation is. As well as, to make sure there was no sort of blockage in my system.

Long story short they didnt find anything out of the ordinary (except for "a lot of stool"), and just gave me a laxative to clear me out. It worked, but I'm kind of concerned that they just dealt with the problem rather than the cause. Oh well, hopefully the laxative worked as a way to kind of clear-out my system to help it run the way it should.

And just cause I'm weird like that, I weighed myself before/after the BM from the lax.

I lost 5 pounds...

Anyway, onto the diet for the day

DIET

Cals 2,390
Carbs 231
Fat 81
Protein 208

Some Eats:

[Zewski92]

Ok so I realized a something today.

I'm ****ing small!

I got an issue of Muscle&Fitness mag in the mail today (I didn't even realize I had a subscription) and it was basically the NFL strength issue. On the Cover was Clay Matthews (one of my fav players). And while he wasn't "shredded" (i.e. 5% bodyfat) he looked jacked.

Within the actual mag was an article on Thomas Jones (A player I've liked since his stint with the bears) and his "guns". In the article they said that TJ was 5'10'' and weighed 215 lbs. Again he didn't possess the skin of an onion, but he was jacked as hell and obviously strong to boot.

Finally I came across a brief snippet on Ray Rice (yet another player I love, this time since Ray Rice just happens to be from RU. Plus, he's right around my height yet still kicks ass on the field ). This one was the kicker since it listed Ray Rice as 5'8'' and weighing 212

This means Ray Rice is 1 inch taller than me, but outweighs me by about 60lbs.!

Now I'm aware that these are genetically gifted individuals who have been training they're whole lives to reach the level they're at today. What I also realized though is that I shouldn't be scared to put on weight and desperately need to put on size, as it will probably make me look much better in the long run to be a strong 165 than a ripped 150.

As a final note I was psyched when at the gym today i broke my long time plateau of 185x5 on flat bench (got it for 6 ) just to come back and see that ray rice benches 385lbs.

Lessons Learned: I need to grow, and the only way to do this is to stop worrying about "teh six-pack abz", lift some heavy ****, and eat like a ****ing man.

LETS GO!

[ArmaniBri]

I'm not an expert but doubt your maintenance is even 2390 calories. Why not go 3k +? I'll be following though.

[Zewski92]

I'm not an expert but doubt your maintenance is even 2390 calories. Why not go 3k +? I'll be following though.

Well right now I'm eating roughly 2600 per week. I'm gonna continue to add cals as necessary, but I'm gonna make it a gradual process. Thanks for following along!

[Zewski92]

9/27/11

Ok so today was a good day. Not only was a slightly less "full of it", but I also hit a PR that's long alluded me

WORKOUT
Bench
185x6
175x7
165x8
*I decided to switch to flat bench since I plateaued at 205 for 6 on decline for some time now. I didn't know what to expect with the exercise since it's been a while since Ive done bench, however I was pleasantly surprised to find that I was able to surpass my long time best of 185x5

Press
105x7
95x8
85x10
*Gonna just cycle these two exercises every push workout trying to keep the second exercise in the 8-10 rep range and the first in the 6-8 rep range

Incline DB Flye
50x10
45x12,10
*Felt Good

Lateral Raise
20x12+5+5+3+3+3
*Myo-reps

Push-up
BWx26
*+1 from last workout, not really sure why I did this haha

Tricep Band Push-Downs
Mini-Bandx15 (per arm)
*for some extra volume, and to satisfy my inner bro

Static Stretch
w/65 for 1:00

Shoulder Dislocations
Mini-Bandx15

DIET

Cals 2,741
Carbs 324
Fat 67
Protein 209

PWO


DIN-DIN

[Zewski92]

9/28/11

WORKOUT
Legs (Deads)

Deadlift
310(2xbodyweight)x5.5
280x6x2
*So I couldn't lock out rep number 6 i even tried to rest for 10 seconds and then go for it again and still couldn't do it :\ but I moved up on the down reps so I guess it wasn't that bad. Either way I should definitely be able to get 6 reps next time.

Leg Extensions
200x8
185x8
170x9

Calf Raises in smith
+180x12,11,11

Lying Leg Curls
80x12
95x10x2

Cable Crunches
87.5x8x2

Not too shabby, but I'm kind of concerned that deads the day before weighted chins may not be the best idea. I guess tomorrow will tell

DIET

Cals 2,725
Carbs 319
Fat 71
Protein 208

PWO


DIN-DIN


Pre-Bed


MOTIVATION

Just some motivation to help me realize that I need to PUT ON SIZE

MJD: 5' 7'', 210lbs.
http://www.google.com/imgres?q=mauri...:429,r:22,s:48

Ray Rice: 5'8'', 215
http://swoonworthy.net/wp-content/up...ray-rice-2.jpg

[Zewski92]

9/29/11

DIET
Cals 2,393
Carbs 272
Fats 66
Protein 196

Eats

Beans with ketchup, cottage cheese, lots o bacon, and jack's links nuggs. And brussels


Cottage cheese, peanut butter, honey, syrup, and jelly. Blended and frozen

[The Solution]

Just wrote this:

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...#post758932913

[Zewski92]

awesome post bob, I could only read it really quick cause i gotta run to class. But later today I'll read it again, and again, and then a third time. I really gotta hammer it in my head that I'm young and in my prime and i gotta FUEL THE FIRE!

Just to clarify, I know you linked that to me to just give another reality check, but I'm at least headin in the right direction right? I'm not quite spinning my wheels that badly am I?

[Zewski92]

9/30/11

WORKOUT
none

DIET

Cals2,437
Carbs 230
Fat 77
Protein 217

NOMNOMNOM

Oats/CC/honey/PB/heaven

[Zewski92]

10/1/11

WORKOUT
Pull

Chins
+40x7*
+25x8
+x10x9
*PR at this weight

Pullups
BWx10
*was going for fifteen

T-Bar Row
+60x10 (one arm at time)
+130x10x2 (both arms)


Shrug
255x10x2
*No straps no Power-shrugs

EZ-Bar Curl
60x10x3

Reverse Curl
60x8

Reverse Flye
25x10
*realized I was ****ing around, so I stopped here

DIET
Cals 2793
Fat 73
Carbs 366
Protein 207

PWO Feast



THOUGHTS
Ok so two days ago 9/30 I weighed in at 153 so I decided to up the cals. However when I weighed myself yesterday I weighed 157 O_o

My intuition tells me its just due to the fact that I haven't had a BM since tuesday (and have gone to the doc/gotten some lax's for the problem), and there's just a lot of "bulk" in there. so the weight spike doesn't bother me

I'm just havin a lot of problems with my FFB mentaility I can't help second guessing myself and thinking that I'm just getting fat and not putting on muscle. Regardless, I'm gonna stay the course and see how I feel during today's workout. Hopefully my bench will be improved from last week.

BENCHAPALOOZA!!!

[Zewski92]

10/2/11

WORKOUT
Push

Bench
185x5.5
170x7x2
*I think I missed 6 reps today due to the fact that i had to use a thicker bar than last week. Not a good excuse just something I noticed.

Press
105x8
100x10,9
*might have missed bench but my press is goin through the roof. Don't know how I managed 10 reps on the second set but hey I'll take it

Incline Flye
45x12x3

Overhead DB Extension
55x12
65x11

Then finished with some random rear delt flyes and shoulder dislocation sith mini-band

DIET
Cals 2,753
Carbs 331
Fats 68
Protein 207

PWO

taters with bacon, jerky, and ketchup. and a protein shake with honey and ice cream mixed in

before bed
cup of oats, cup of cottage cheese, 4tbsps honey peanut butter
As I said, I may be gettin a bit fatter. But who gives a ****? I'm also getting strong and I'm young and active and need to take advantage of my youth. Time to ****in grow. Squats tomorrow.

For your viewing pleasure, one of the best videos I've ever seen. Makes me miss football like crazy but the speech can apply to anything.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jal4O...5QgIiCbGMfS6Kw

now time to get some sleep and grow.

[Zewski92]

10/3/11

Off-Day

DIET
Cals 2434
Carbs 231
Fat 82
Protein 200

Im gonna hold off on raising cals until my digestion issues have subsided, which they should since I've recently started taking medicine to help the issue. Only because it's hard to track my weight with all this bulk in my system. Until then I'll base it off of strength gain/loss.

Squats today YEA BUDDAY!!!!

[Zewski92]

Well I'm gonna keep this brief. Everything was going great today. O had a great legs workout getting recent pr'a and such. Also I hit my cal and macros for the day.

And then o binged. Badly. I managed to stop myself before downing half abuse of pb. But that was only after a pot of stuffing multiple granola bars and a bowl of rice krispies.

Not sure what triggered it. I think all the tracking just got to me. I just kept telling myself. It's ok people bulk on crazy high calories all the time. I need to to do this. Then it turned to. It's ok ill just fast for a day or two to make up for this.

Now I just feel like **** mentally and physically. I'm mad I let myself do this. And I'm obviously guilty now.

Font know where to go from here. All this teachings getting to me bit I've been doing this for so long I almost don't know how else to get by.

Now Im just kind of rambling and ranting and should probably just go to bed.

[ErikTheElectric]

Well I'm gonna keep this brief. Everything was going great today. O had a great legs workout getting recent pr'a and such. Also I hit my cal and macros for the day.

And then o binged. Badly. I managed to stop myself before downing half abuse of pb. But that was only after a pot of stuffing multiple granola bars and a bowl of rice krispies.

Not sure what triggered it. I think all the tracking just got to me. I just kept telling myself. It's ok people bulk on crazy high calories all the time. I need to to do this. Then it turned to. It's ok ill just fast for a day or two to make up for this.

Now I just feel like **** mentally and physically. I'm mad I let myself do this. And I'm obviously guilty now.

Font know where to go from here. All this teachings getting to me bit I've been doing this for so long I almost don't know how else to get by.

Now Im just kind of rambling and ranting and should probably just go to bed.

Don't worry about it man, sh*t happens, your 19. Just use it as fuel and hit it hard tomorrow, just DONT do anything crazy like fast or eat low amounts to make up for your binge.
I can only tell you that things will end up 10x worse if you do this.

Keep your chin up man, your doing great.

Erik

[Zewski92]

thanks man. I appreciate you reachin out. Just gotta take it one day at a time I guess.

[Zewski92]

Letting go....sort of

Ok so I tried my best to just eat normally yesterday, while still if'ing cause that's my lifestyle now, but I still could'nt just ****ing let go!

I was worried about eating too many carbs or not enough protein. It's ****ing pathetic, but at least for now I'm gonna track cals again, because that just gives me ease of mind. And I'm gonna be honest, the binge was NOT diet related. I have a lot of other things going on in my life that lead to me using food to cope. I don't feel deprived at all and I doubt the binge will happen again.

so no clue what yesterday's macros looked like, I could go back and figure it out probably but what's the ****ing point? I'm just gonna continue today with what I've been doing.

I am however contemplating switching routines, I've been doing RPT for a couple months now, and while I think it's great while dieting I think I can get more out of something dedicated more to pure strength while I'm in such an anabolic state.

Speaking of anabolism weight this morning was 158!

Granted this is still post-binge weight, plus not tracking yesterday. So we'll see where my weight's at after about a week or so.

I'm also contemplating keeping the cals static during my bulk.

Mental masturbation's fun isnt it?