**The New Formula for Picking Up Chicks**

[Samsong]

I wouldn't abandon BB.com at all bro. Would love to move it to FB so I can really help guys who are actively looking to improve and not just post once they are in deep shiat with a particular girl.

Online Dating wasn't that big when I started the thread, but that's a great topic and something I will cover, good idea.

Not Paying: so many different schools of thought on this one, I definitely have updated advice on this topic, will also cover soon.

Building Conversation: there's so much non-verbal communication going on to build conversation, I will go more in depth on this one as well.

I'll be making a post soon talking about what I'm up to now.





SH

Looking forward to it bro, I remember reading your stuff in 2007 lol

fuark ..time

[Sauce-head]

What have you been up to the past 10 years brah?

A lot! haha I promise I'll make an thorough updated post here to fill everyone in on where life has taken me since I was a youngin posting on BB.com way back in 2002.





SH

[nctarheels21]

Innnnn again on this. Hoping we can get this thread moving again.

[Sauce-head]

Been doing a lot of thinking lately and wanted to have guys chime in here and let me know what are some of the things you struggle with in being successful with women? Is it approach anxiety? Is it self limiting beliefs? I'm not good looking enough, tall enough, shredded enough? I don't know what to do after I get a girl's #? I can't read her signs to know if she's actually interested?

Also would like to get more guys active in posting their current situations and where they need help.









SH

[atgbrahsrs]

I'm not good looking enough, tall enough, shredded enough?

this

[REN0183]

IS there a formula? Honesty? You see hot girl, hot girl sees you, you strike up a convo, you exchange numbers or social media contacts, you chat about stuff, then you ask them on a date. Girl goes on date, you see if chemistry is there, you are a gentlemen you pay, pick up the tip, walk the girl to the car, open the door, she gets in. Take her home, you give her a hug and let HER decide if she wants to kiss you, then you say "thank you for a wonderful night, I'll call you tomorrow".

That's how you pick up women.

There's really nothing to it but to be honest and yourself. Don't pretend you aren't checking out her ass when you oogle it when she turns around. She's going to find out you're just a perv trying to get in her pants. I mean, the ultimate goal is usually some form of sex, but there's a way to be a gentlemen about it. And, it's not a game. Boys play games. It's as easy as, i like you, you like me.

[whatthewhut]

That moment when the alphas are the scrawny or chubby nerds playing Pokemon Go, walking around with beautiful women all over Austin and Dallas. Meanwhile you Betas are here sourcing lame ass pickup guides and working on your biceps.
Cracked brought me here to call you beta bitches. Lmao. Go back to jerking each other off. All serious body builders are closet cases.

Feeding the troll- alpha/Pokemon GO..does not compute...but of course, anything is possible.

[whatthewhut]

is there a formula? Honesty? You see hot girl, hot girl sees you, you strike up a convo, you exchange numbers or social media contacts, you chat about stuff, then you ask them on a date. Girl goes on date, you see if chemistry is there, you are a gentlemen you pay, pick up the tip, walk the girl to the car, open the door, she gets in. Take her home, you give her a hug and let her decide if she wants to kiss you, then you say "thank you for a wonderful night, i'll call you tomorrow".

That's how you pick up women.

There's really nothing to it but to be honest and yourself. Don't pretend you aren't checking out her ass when you oogle it when she turns around. She's going to find out you're just a perv trying to get in her pants. I mean, the ultimate goal is usually some form of sex, but there's a way to be a gentlemen about it. And, it's not a game. Boys play games. It's as easy as, i like you, you like me.

this

[InstantLoser]

IS there a formula? Honesty? You see hot girl, hot girl sees you, you strike up a convo, you exchange numbers or social media contacts, you chat about stuff, then you ask them on a date. Girl goes on date, you see if chemistry is there, you are a gentlemen you pay, pick up the tip, walk the girl to the car, open the door, she gets in. Take her home, you give her a hug and let HER decide if she wants to kiss you, then you say "thank you for a wonderful night, I'll call you tomorrow".

That's how you pick up women.

There's really nothing to it but to be honest and yourself. Don't pretend you aren't checking out her ass when you oogle it when she turns around. She's going to find out you're just a perv trying to get in her pants. I mean, the ultimate goal is usually some form of sex, but there's a way to be a gentlemen about it. And, it's not a game. Boys play games. It's as easy as, i like you, you like me.

Fairy tale nonsense.

[Sauce-head]

IS there a formula? Honesty? You see hot girl, hot girl sees you, you strike up a convo, you exchange numbers or social media contacts, you chat about stuff, then you ask them on a date. Girl goes on date, you see if chemistry is there, you are a gentlemen you pay, pick up the tip, walk the girl to the car, open the door, she gets in. Take her home, you give her a hug and let HER decide if she wants to kiss you, then you say "thank you for a wonderful night, I'll call you tomorrow".

That's how you pick up women.

There's really nothing to it but to be honest and yourself. Don't pretend you aren't checking out her ass when you oogle it when she turns around. She's going to find out you're just a perv trying to get in her pants. I mean, the ultimate goal is usually some form of sex, but there's a way to be a gentlemen about it. And, it's not a game. Boys play games. It's as easy as, i like you, you like me.

1) Most newbies have social anxieties around attractive women; starting up a conversation is difficult for them. Even once you are comfortable with this, you need to be able to capture her interest and learn how to create attraction; that doesn't happen by chance.

2) Depending on the age demographic you're in; younger girls can instantly lose attraction if you are too chivalrous too soon; the element of the chase is like a drug that many of them crave. I'm not saying that's inherently wrong (its not), but can seal your fate when you could have a great opportunity to close her if you create challenge.

3) You decide if she wants to kiss you? Absolutely not.

4) Tell her you'll call her tomorrow? No

5) Ahh the classic advice "be yourself." Makes sense in theory, but not in application. Why? Because "being yourself" means different things to different people.

6) Wanting to have shex with an attractive woman, doesn't make you a perv, it makes you a man.

7) Its as easy as "I like you, you like me." Not even close man.

With all that said, I'm not totally disagreeing with some of the things you said above. However there is a process to this all aka formula to getting these things (actions, words, behavior) work in your favor. Say something too soon "I like you" before attraction is created and you will lose her fast. There's always exceptions, but I'm referring to the vast majority of very attractive women in everything I'm saying.







SH

[cirion0000]

So I still have a VERY long road to follow to go from being beta male to alpha (I'm still wayyyy more beta than alpha, but more alpha than I've been ever this past year, in the sense I've actually talked to a few chicks, some completely randomly, some even with a decent convo, but I'm still working on getting more/better dates etc and I totally F'd up a few (thus never getting a second) but I feel confident that a future first date I could nail down better when I get another one, because I realized the mistake I have made is make the date too long, and not initiate any sort of touching at all (always feared being considered a creep, well screw that noise).

I got a huge, hot tip that, while not complete magic, idk if the OP ever touched on. And I firmly believe the people who'll get the most benefit out of it are former extreme beta males like I was. Simply this - nofap. It's slowly been changing my life the past year or so in general, I first started it last year. In addition, nosocial media, and if you're really ambitious (I'm working on this aspect) no TV, no video games to motivate you to go out (like to the mall as suggested to talk to random chicks there, maybe get #'s). Nofap/noporn is the biggest part though. Basically, it rewires your brain to get more desperate to talk to real chicks rather than rely on your "digital harem" of porn or stalking hot girls you'll never get on IG, ********, whatever, and the "non scientific" answer is just that - your brain realizes that now the only way its going to get any sort of relief is to approach that hot chick in the grocery store, at work, or whatever. You also inherently start to pick up on attraction signs better. Just last weekend I glanced over three 4-6's (nothing super hot) and looked away pretty quickly. I couldn't help but notice as I was going back into my car, though, that not one or two but all three (!!!) looked back at me. I also notice a lot more girls randomly smiling at me, or even randomly saying hi to ME on occasion, especially in situations like elevator rides together (that never used to happen). My confidence is natural and not fake on nofap, maybe it won't work for everyone, but I'm a firm believer in it now. Try it, if you don't like it, not like you have to keep doing it. The only thing is that it's not as effective when you're in a calorie deficit (darn those hormones). But when you do nofap on calorie maintenance/working out/or even calorie surplus, wow, the horniness + drive to talk to chicks is HIGH, high enough that even a beta male like me starts to exude alpha qualities. Needless to say, I'm eager to be done with this stupid cut and get back to feeling like $100000000 again. Even still, even on a cut, I have some days I feel pretty amazing. Especially after refeed day lol.

Another recent example is a girl initiated flirting with ME, receptionist at the personal training place I get my coaching from. And, with being able to be more alpha-like than general, I proceed to flirt a lil back - even saying something like "Long time no see, did you miss me?" I was surprised to even hear myself say that!! I very likely have an in with this chick, and while she's not the hottest she could be fun, she has a fun playful side. Again, I'm the biggest beta male ever (or at least was, my whole life). I'm very pleased with my progress, but I'm still not where I wanna be (I feel like at this point, I just need experience, so there's some good stuff in here.) The hormonal aspect though, as I say, is not to be underestimated. It's almost impossible to be alpha (not impossible, but nigh) if you're hormones are making you beta. I had bad nutrition, didn't workout etc had bad sleep, let things stress me out too much, did other beta male things like stay on dating websites all day desperately sending 100s of messages hoping some hot chick would reply... before and all that crap really worked against me.

Dating websites probably only are effective if you are exceptionally hot (like, absolutely shredded - that's not as important in real life where not nearly as many guys hit on chicks as you suggested, but on dating websites where chicks get hundreds of messages a day if you don't have the looks a chick won't even open your message) and/or have a 11/10 sense of humor. Therefore, it's only useful to the master PUA... and ironically, most people using dating websites because they're NOT a good PUA.... long story short? Go throw your dating website account(s) in the trash ASAP... I'm never looking back myself. If you're that good of a PUA, you don't need no freakin dating website account anyways, you could just go pick up a dozen chicks right now by going to the mall!

Anywho, so yeah, my thing now is not so much studying how to do it (that being said, there's some good stuff in here. I know how to do it, just gotta do it) but optimizing hormones, whilst simultaneously making an effort to get practice, pretty much really does do all the work for you. The body is an incredible thing, and its amazing what you'll do / what courage you'll have when you're horny (so my goal is to get to a point where I'm basically always horny, a difficult process when I've been low testosterone most my life). I've carefully analyzed my thought processes when I'm turned on vs not, and its interesting to see how aggressive I get when I am, like with literally zero effort, it just happens, your body does 90% of the work in this situation, so it's the ideal state to be in as much as you can as a man for sure, and I know it's pretty much impossible, but I wish it was at all possible to literally walk around with a boner 24/7 because it feels good, you are more aggressive, hitting on chicks on this state is effortless, etc etc. I constantly work on getting closer to this state, by changing around nutrition, my workouts, etc. So I'm extremely jealous of guys with naturally high testosterone, as they're naturally in a much better state to get chicks than low mortals like me with < 500 ng/DL testosterone etc.

[DarkKnightBrah]

lol I remember clicking this thread before and saying to myself, "wtf have I been doing posting in general misc and not here about topics like this" and now I accidentally find myself here again

i have some experience with cold approaching girls but can't be bothered at this point to classify my skill level

i can do some wild chit with openers and physically escalate but still have some sticking points I'm aware of

I am also pretty good looking (confirmed by many compliments from girls of all ages + guys (been hit on more than I'd like by gays) alike) so at this point I'm confident im not being rejected because of my looks

I actually don't get laid as much as I'd like from cold approach because I only go out 1x a week (sometimes 1x per 2 weeks)...I literally do not meet any girls in between so I know i'm dropping a lot of prospects but that's life

I have a busy work schedule I'm not willing to compromise so I'm happy at this point with simply just maximizing my 1 day free to holler at girls

Hmm, what else I actually don't have a big ego in all this...I'm very much focused on getting results and not this ego compare chit with "I'm uber badass pro slayer/player"...I've heard this from guys who don't even approach so that kind of statement is worth near zero to me

I would say I'm here mainly to find a more positive env to discuss hollerin at girls (general misc is too toxic and retarded these days)

alright prob check back later brahs, gotta hit the gym...my true luv

peace~

[Sauce-head]

lol I remember clicking this thread before and saying to myself, "wtf have I been doing posting in general misc and not here about topics like this" and now I accidentally find myself here again

i have some experience with cold approaching girls but can't be bothered at this point to classify my skill level

i can do some wild chit with openers and physically escalate but still have some sticking points I'm aware of

I am also pretty good looking (confirmed by many compliments from girls of all ages + guys (been hit on more than I'd like by gays) alike) so at this point I'm confident im not being rejected because of my looks

I actually don't get laid as much as I'd like from cold approach because I only go out 1x a week (sometimes 1x per 2 weeks)...I literally do not meet any girls in between so I know i'm dropping a lot of prospects but that's life

I have a busy work schedule I'm not willing to compromise so I'm happy at this point with simply just maximizing my 1 day free to holler at girls

Hmm, what else I actually don't have a big ego in all this...I'm very much focused on getting results and not this ego compare chit with "I'm uber badass pro slayer/player"...I've heard this from guys who don't even approach so that kind of statement is worth near zero to me

I would say I'm here mainly to find a more positive env to discuss hollerin at girls (general misc is too toxic and retarded these days)

alright prob check back later brahs, gotta hit the gym...my true luv

peace~

What up man. Sounds like you're off to a good start and have a lot of natural potential. Repetition and frequency are the keys that will build your confidence. You don't necessarily have to go "out" with the intent of cold approaching to get better and develop your game. You need to simply practice, because opportunities are endless and everywhere. Practice on girls you're not even interested in just to do it.

If I were you I'd make it my goal to practice on at least one or two girls everyday and then approach several on the 1-2 days you go out per week.








SH

[JundEmOut]

Hey. Is this an example of a chick trying to game me?:

Chick tends to volunteer to be my DD when we're out with friends. Chick's friend wants to go somewhere, tells me "JeO, tell chick you wanna go to whataburger. She likes you, she'll do whatever you ask."

Later on, Chick comes to me for help (first time I saw her in a while because of work). Afterward we converse, its a bit awkward and I cut it short. She jumps in "hey, if you ever need anything just come on up to my place. Its always open. Seems like I'm always coming over here for your help."

I don't wanna turn into a Flapjacko misc.

[Sauce-head]

Only one way to find out; take action. Flirt, touch and make eye contact with her and see how she responds to it.






SH

[DarkKnightBrah]

What up man. Sounds like you're off to a good start and have a lot of natural potential. Repetition and frequency are the keys that will build your confidence. You don't necessarily have to go "out" with the intent of cold approaching to get better and develop your game. You need to simply practice, because opportunities are endless and everywhere. Practice on girls you're not even interested in just to do it.

If I were you I'd make it my goal to practice on at least one or two girls everyday and then approach several on the 1-2 days you go out per week.








SH

Thx for the suggestion, brah

It's something I'm looking to incorporate in a way that won't interfere with my loaded work schedule, so we'll see how that works out

You sound like the veteran pickup brah around here, so happy to be able to interact with brahs who are more srs about pickup skills than the average dude

Was planning to go out and cold approach today, but sadly got sick yesterday so gonna lay low and recover sooner so I can kill it on the next outing

my Tinder + cold approach contacts are blowing up...like literally a list of girl matches I can message (and a few who even messaged me first)

what I think most guys don't get is that pickup is a process that can be improved upon like any other skill

most guys have too large of an ego to become a student to the process...thinking they are good at getting girls by default

I continuously am staying open-minded to learning...even when I get success in the field I constantly question how I could do better or obtain better logistics, etc.

I used to find logistics annoying, but now I find improving upon it THE primary interest of pickup

About 90% of the work in the field can be optimized by improving your logistics

There's a few other factors in play too, but the gist of my analysis of pickup is that 90% of the work is in the background, talking to girls is probably only 10%

Kinda like how diet plays into bodybuilding...you can train all you want, but you ain't gonna get good results with chit diet

[SCREWLIFE]

[QUOTE=Coal Man;484535281]C"Are you seeing CB (cock
This whole thing is wayyy to much to even start doing. I am 24,never had sex a date or a girlfriend. This seems impossible and on top of that if I have to do all this to get a women or sex. It is not worth it. A lot of it seems manipulative and sociopathic as well. I hope others get from this post but for me, its just like all the other posts on the internet, useless. You and your friend and a host of others tell guys to just go ahead and do this and do that when there are a lot of other factors involved. I read the whole thing and still did not get anything that I could use. For the thousands of guys like me who have not benefited from this post and who probably will never get a woman, there has to be something better then this. Oh well, after reading this I am giving up on women completely. Thanks but no thanks.

[GCap]

Guys there is no formula to pick up chicks. From a chicks view. If I like you, I like you.

[SCREWLIFE]

Here's something you can try that may help. Think about the way you _want_ to be, your ideal self, and brainstorm what your pleasures/pains would have to be for you to be that way. Think about what anchors you'd need to add and remove, and then reorder the lists accordingly. This alone might cause some nifty changes...

Changing Your Beliefs
You've got three basic choices when it comes to beliefs. Remember, your brain tends to filter out references that run contrary to your beliefs, so one approach is to go over your beliefs and references consciously and sort them out. This is referred to in clinical psychology as Cognitive Therapy, and, in my opinion, is the _worst_ way to go about it. I'll share the process with you anyway in case the other options don't work.

Go through the following questions with each of the beliefs you need to change:

What is your belief?
Why do you believe that? What references are you using to support this?
Is it possible that you've evaluated these experiences poorly? (This is especially true of childhood experiences, when your cognitive powers aren't at their best). If so, go back into them and re-evaluate. It probably seemed terrible at the time, but would it be so bad if it happened to you now?
How much pain is this belief causing you?
What are you afraid would happen if you didn't believe this?
What references do you have that run contrary to this? After reviewing these references, are you still sure you believe that?
Ugh. That hurt even writing it. But that might've at least weakened the beliefs and their hold on you, if nothing else.

Option two is probably the best but the hardest to achieve. Remember, "powerful experiences" such as a rape or car accident can smash through beliefs as if they were paper. Unfortunately, it's hard to come up with a power experience to cure shyness (short of a woman coming up to you, saying "you know, you drive us all WILD, baby!" and making love to you right there - I wish).

Instead, most of us progress in small steps - starting conversations, getting comfortable with conversations, getting a date, becoming comfortable with dating, starting a relationship, becoming comfortable with relationships, etc. which could take months, years, or a lifetime.

So we're left with option three - use positive references consistently and repeatedly.

Affirmations
Start a new list entitled "Affirmations". Go over your list of negative beliefs, and for each one, create a positive statement to counteract it. Include a reference from your life if possible. It's important that you follow these rules:

make sure it's positive - "I am not shy" won't work too well
make it first person - "I this, I that" rather than "People this, women that, men ..."
make it present tense - "I am confident" rather than "I will be confident"
make sure it's something _you_ control - not "I date more often than Frank does"
try to include rich sensory imagery, powerful emotional anchors, and references
Samples:
I easily talk to anyone I have a desire to meet. I am clever and witty and relaxed.
I have immense courage. I overcome any fears.
I'm fit and attractive. I keep my body in great shape.
I remember to compliment people and to show I appreciate them.
I am happy with myself, regardless of what other people think.
Right now you're probably asking yourself, "So why am I telling myself all this stuff that obviously isn't true?" Remember, your own thoughts are part of the input your brain takes in, and it doesn't question anything, it just processes and stores everything. At first your beliefs will reject these statements, but with enough consistency, repetition and references, your beliefs will eventually change. Studies show it takes about a month of daily repetition, but that depends on how often you go over your affirmations. The best thing to do would be to print them out on a card and keep them with you during the day, and just read over them whenever you get the chance. As you read them, imagine how good it will feel to be that way; really get into it.

Within one month of implementing this technique, the author of the book I got this from went from hiding behind plants at parties to dating regularly. He is now in his second marriage and makes his living as an author and motivational speaker.
[Post 4]


The New Behaviour Generator
Once you've gotten rid of your disempowering beliefs and anchors, you're ready to take on new behaviour. You could just do this by practice, but you're bound to fail and embarrass yourself for a while that way. The New Behaviour Generator can help with that.


find a model, either your imagined "ideal self" or someone you know that already has this behaviour mastered.

ask yourself "what beliefs does this behaviour need to maintain itself?" Go through the processes I've discussed to make your beliefs congruent if you need to.

Mentally rehearse the model from the outside first, then step inside it, walk around in it, see from those eyes, hear with those ears, feel with that body. Experience the new positive intention of the behaviour and the positive rewards both in what is gained and in what is avoided.

Go back in your life to a time when you (could have) learned this behaviour and imagine that it became a part of you, then project back through the present and into the future.

Practice doing this several times a day until you forget to mentally rehearse it because you find you are already doing it!
I can personally vouch for the NBG, because I have some experience with acting, which is very similar. When I do a play I tend to model myself after my character backstage as well as onstage, and the last time I did a play I noticed several women gravitating toward me, and I had all kinds of dating opportunities. It's too bad that the effect didn't last, but it was because I still believed in my shyness deep down. Now I know better! :=)

I think the strategy of mental rehearsal is a very important one that we tend to overlook. We often fantasize about what it will be like once we have a significant other, but rarely do we imagine things like approaching people, starting conversations and asking for dates because these things are painful to us. Or if we do imagine those things, we tend to see the worst case scenario, which just makes us feel worse. Starting now, make it a habit to use the NBG, or at least visualize yourself socializing successfully, and dealing with rejection and embarrassment effectively.

Conclusion
Well, that's everything. I think if you go back over all the strategies I talked about, you'll notice that most of them are quick and easy. That's because they attack the cause of the problem, not the symptoms. Now all you need is a little motivation to start using them regularly. I understand that you have reason to be skeptical about a lot of it (esp. NLP), but my advice is this: don't trust the scientific authorities or anybody else, or even your own beliefs, conditioning and common sense. TRY THEM OUT, and trust your own senses. Test them yourself. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.

Lol this is good but all of this seems impossible. There is absolutely no way i could do any of this. I am 24, never had sex a date or even talked to a girl. Thanks for the post though.

[scumblack24]

Thanks for making this thread OP, very helpful

[DolphinPilot]

Guys there is no formula to pick up chicks. From a chicks view. If I like you, I like you.

The term "formula" is used loosely. It's moreso a list of criteria to meet to make yourself attractive to a woman. What makes you like a guy? A lot of it boils down to things within the man's control that he is likely unaware of.

[DonaldNguyen68]

Thanks for sharing. It really is useful

[Pungiish]

Bump

[IdealTesto]

Great advice man!

[iloveus]

How does qualification work?

[iloveus]

Lol this is good but all of this seems impossible. There is absolutely no way i could do any of this. I am 24, never had sex a date or even talked to a girl. Thanks for the post though.

Strong limiting belief. Quit limiting yourself. Have you even tried to do any of the above or are you just crying because you don't wanna do it for the fact that it's "difficult".

[iloveus]

Guys there is no formula to pick up chicks. From a chicks view. If I like you, I like you.

True there is no formula. Attraction is very much a subconscious thing. But the point of this thread is self-improvement. It's show men of the misc to become better versions of themselves.

[TheLazerOne]

How successful is this stuff on non surgically enhanced non-b*tches for making actual long term relationships?

[lemonpopper]

Thanks

[Hazard2]

is this for real