ALCOHOLICS: RECOVERY & FITNESS (Serious Only Please)

[thepainter5]

...this might be hard to believe...those friends will turn out one day not your friends...never were.....

What you said there is more true than most people want to believe. When I finally decided "I" needed to stop using, 98% of the "friends" I had stopped hanging around. After being straight for a year or so a couple of others decided I was no fun anymore and even my own brothers spent less time with me, all because I was no longer a source of drugs.
I have had the chance to talk to many people about quitting drugs and without a doubt one of their biggest hangups to sobriety is walking away from their "friends".
As Baldie said those "friends" really aren't as they are just the enablers & addicts who like company as they head for their own bottom.
As of late one of the hardest battles I have had to deal with is a daughter who is living with a drug dealer whom "she loves and can't live without". She does well when he is in prison but falls back into using when he's out. Sadly he was just released 3 weeks ago.

[timitsoo]

One day for me. Who whoooo!!! LOL No, I'm not a drunk, passed out, can't go to work drinker, but if I have nothing really going on, my car will tend to pull into the liquor store parking lot and I'll get a 1/2 pint of vodka. For no reason that I even think about at the time. I just tell myself, the afternoon/evening will go better with booze. Sad, and after it's all gone, I get so mad at myself for doing it. Wonder why and then swear I won't do it again. (again and again) So, I am just working on figuring out ways to fight that little voice in my head that says "go get something". So, anyway, I enjoy reading this post and it gives me hope. Mostly I just want my life to turn around and be more positive. I know a HUGE key ingredient to that will be to stop the drinking.

Peace out!

[afterguard]

Thanks for your reply. Glad to have found this site. I shocked some people last weekend when I announced I was the DD for the night. I did it too, just a glass of wine with my steak and that's it. Felt great the next day. I think a lot of the guys wives actually thought it was cool that I had that kind of control. I chose to lead not follow.

[plaskowski2002]

One day for me. Who whoooo!!! LOL No, I'm not a drunk, passed out, can't go to work drinker, but if I have nothing really going on, my car will tend to pull into the liquor store parking lot and I'll get a 1/2 pint of vodka. For no reason that I even think about at the time. I just tell myself, the afternoon/evening will go better with booze. Sad, and after it's all gone, I get so mad at myself for doing it. Wonder why and then swear I won't do it again. (again and again) So, I am just working on figuring out ways to fight that little voice in my head that says "go get something". So, anyway, I enjoy reading this post and it gives me hope. Mostly I just want my life to turn around and be more positive. I know a HUGE key ingredient to that will be to stop the drinking.

Peace out!

well we all ahve to start at day one. what you were describing was classic. like the shame and guilt that comes along with it. over and over we wont do it again. but look out for the shame and guilt because thats what keeps us sick. i believe drinking and using are just a symptom. there is always an underlying issue so for me i had to get my head treated too. along with all the drug and alcholal counseling, numerouse treatments centers etc i had to get down to some issues that i wasnt even awhare of so mental health counseling was a big help. i had to learn to live and to feel with out alcholal and drugs. thats when all these emotions started to surface that i had no idea i had. i mean thats why i drank, not to feel. just take it one day at a time and im so glad i found this thread. thanks everyone.

[timitsoo]

well we all ahve to start at day one. what you were describing was classic. like the shame and guilt that comes along with it. over and over we wont do it again. but look out for the shame and guilt because thats what keeps us sick. i believe drinking and using are just a symptom. there is always an underlying issue so for me i had to get my head treated too. along with all the drug and alcholal counseling, numerouse treatments centers etc i had to get down to some issues that i wasnt even awhare of so mental health counseling was a big help. i had to learn to live and to feel with out alcholal and drugs. thats when all these emotions started to surface that i had no idea i had. i mean thats why i drank, not to feel. just take it one day at a time and im so glad i found this thread. thanks everyone.

Yes, that's the crazy part, knowing that I'm obviously trying to NOT feel, but I'm not really even sure why. Whatever the reason, I know like I mentioned before, that I need to learn how to live WITH feeling. Learn how to get through the evenings without being numbed out or whatever. Being unemployed doesn't help. Sometimes the afternoons would become my time to start making cocktails. So annoying to me too because then the late afternoon/evenings all I would want to do is go to sleep.

However, I feel much more positive about everything when I don't drink. Obviously I don't feel like I'm wasting my gym time. I feel like gains come so much faster and stay longer. Don't need to tell you all, but the mood stays positive. Sleep comes much easier and lasts longer. Sex drive back to normal, etc etc. So with all those positives, I still wonder where the stupid desire to sidetrack myself with booze comes from. But, that's the secret. Get past that little hurdle one day at a time. That's my goal.

Both my parents were users of everything and both died young. I remember being a teen and saying "lucky me, I don't have that problem". lol Snuck right up on me. Ironically, it's what is keeping me from achieving my best.

I enjoy reading how Baldie mentions how much his life turned around at 40 when he stopped drinking and using. That stuff gives me hope and keeps me thinking positive because I really am desperate for change. I also want to be the best dad I can be for my son.

Thanks all.

[thepainter5]

well we all ahve to start at day one....... mental health counseling was a big help.... I had to learn to live and to feel with out alcholal and drugs. thats when all these emotions started to surface that i had no idea i had. i mean thats why i drank, not to feel. ....

You have hit that nail right on the head. There is always an underlying reason why people abuse drugs and alcohol. It starts out for the fun of it but all too soon using just numbs the pain and when emotions/guilt/shame get to be to much, self medicating becomes the easiest coping mechanism.
Getting through the first day without using, all the while being unable to imagine life with out our daily "companion", is no easy feat. It will get easier but more times than not it will get harder first. What seperates the survivours from the addicts is when the we finally believes that life will be better without the addiction.
It is amazing how our life's can change once our thinking changes.

[BigDaddy33]

... So, I am just working on figuring out ways to fight that little voice in my head that says "go get something". ... Mostly I just want my life to turn around and be more positive. I know a HUGE key ingredient to that will be to stop the drinking.

Peace out!

Find a meeting, go to it. Repeat

[GreenWave1]

One day for me. Who whoooo!!! LOL No, I'm not a drunk, passed out, can't go to work drinker, but if I have nothing really going on, my car will tend to pull into the liquor store parking lot and I'll get a 1/2 pint of vodka. For no reason that I even think about at the time. I just tell myself, the afternoon/evening will go better with booze. Sad, and after it's all gone, I get so mad at myself for doing it. Wonder why and then swear I won't do it again. (again and again) So, I am just working on figuring out ways to fight that little voice in my head that says "go get something". So, anyway, I enjoy reading this post and it gives me hope. Mostly I just want my life to turn around and be more positive. I know a HUGE key ingredient to that will be to stop the drinking.

Peace out!

You want to stop. This is huge. Now how to do it? You could try AA. Can't hurt. When you get the urge, try to do something constructive to distract yourself. Drop and do some pushups. Hit the heavy bag. Pray. Something.

Good luck.

[IgglesFan09]

Hey guys. I've been sober for 9 months now and love my new life. I never want to go back to that. I work my program.

I was interested in starting a stack of mass fx and hyperdrol but don't know if any kind of products like these can be addictive or kick-start some cravings. I want to get big but I don't want my sobriety to be the cost. Do you guys have any advice on these or other test booster products for a fellow drunk?

[Baldiewonkanobi]

Welcome. Loving your new life? I like that. At nine months I was a mess. A sober mess. Not that I wanted to drink but I was unemployed and my drunk friends were long gone leaving me with wife, kids, dogs and thank God....the gym. I needed to talk to some other adult males about sobriety. At that point I went to AA and that got me thru that period. (28 years ago)

I don't know of any suppliments that will mess with your sobriety. They will mess with your wallet. Some have loads of caffeine like stimulants that will jack you up a bit. Hang around the O35 and we cover a lot of ground on suppliments. We have our share of whacos in here but it's way better than the other forums.

Baldie

[IgglesFan09]

Welcome. Loving your new life? I like that. At nine months I was a mess. A sober mess. Not that I wanted to drink but I was unemployed and my drunk friends were long gone leaving me with wife, kids, dogs and thank God....the gym. I needed to talk to some other adult males about sobriety. At that point I went to AA and that got me thru that period. (28 years ago)

I don't know of any suppliments that will mess with your sobriety. They will mess with your wallet. Some have loads of caffeine like stimulants that will jack you up a bit. Hang around the O35 and we cover a lot of ground on suppliments. We have our share of whacos in here but it's way better than the other forums.

Baldie

O35? Is that the over 35 crowd? I'm just worried I'm going to like the feeling too much and go overboard on it... like not stopping the cycle or something stupid. I saw your previous post. You did steriods sober? Did it become a mental obsession thing? You know how we are. haha

[Baldiewonkanobi]

O35 = Over 35 crowd.

I did my 'assisted' Bodybuilding sober. Had zero effect whether or not I wanted to take a drink, snort or toke. Can you get hooked on that? I would say somewhat hooked. The human brain learns (and likes) shortcuts quickly and fights taking the long way home. Depending on what you are doing it can ease DOMS, joint pain and speed recovery. Nothing more. I will discuss this topic openly no further. PM me if you must.

Baldie

[eddied27]

Hey guys. I've been sober for 9 months now and love my new life. I never want to go back to that. I work my program.

I was interested in starting a stack of mass fx and hyperdrol but don't know if any kind of products like these can be addictive or kick-start some cravings. I want to get big but I don't want my sobriety to be the cost. Do you guys have any advice on these or other test booster products for a fellow drunk?

Congrats on the 9 months Iggles!

I ran a MassFX/Hyperdrol log for AX overe 2 years ago which would have made me about 2 years sober at the time. I would still recommend you research it for yourself but here's the old link to my log. I had no issues with cravings.

Best of luck!!

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=908428

[Do_Somethin]

This thread needs to be on then first page so that new people that need to see it can find it easier.
It would make for a good sticky to if it could be done.
Alcohol is a big problem for a lot of people. Some may not even realise it.
I'm glad I did before it was too late.

[bjc12]

agreed. they have self help/support threads stickied in a few other sextion on here. would definately help more people find it and who know how many would stumble on it and take interest

[afterguard]

another weekend passes, and I had one beer (on my boat) and split a bottle of wine to go with my steak. AND it was my b-day. No binges and feeling better everyday.

try? there is no try...do or do not.....

[chodan9]

another weekend passes, and I had one beer (on my boat) and split a bottle of wine to go with my steak. AND it was my b-day. No binges and feeling better everyday.

try? there is no try...do or do not.....

IMO you are playing with fire, I could get by with that every now and then back in the day, but in short order I would find myself back into my old patterns.
Either get sober and focus on not drinking or go out and try and find a bottom that allows you to come back and commit. IF your anything like most of us on this thread, the binge is just waiting to happen.

[Baldiewonkanobi]

Jonathan...that bottom is a scary place. Those of us who have had black outs, lost their business, and peed blood want to scream...STOP NOW...YOU DO NOT WANT TO GO THERE. But then as we know, each must experience life's gutter on their own. It is human nature to think..."no, not me".

That trool who started the Alcohol or Sleep thread in the open Forum really brought out some alkies in denial...ya think?

Baldie

[GreenWave1]

That trool who started the Alcohol or Sleep thread in the open Forum really brought out some alkies in denial...ya think?

It was pretty disturbing. To quote "American Beauty": Never underestimate the power of denial.

[Baldiewonkanobi]

My beach bum bro (formerly the mogul mench) how it it going out west? Way west. Hard to see you from here in East Malibu...gotta make sure those sunsets are still clear and bright.

Baldie

[Nalu]

My beach bum bro (formerly the mogul mench) how it it going out west? Way west. Hard to see you from here in East Malibu...gotta make sure those sunsets are still clear and bright.

Baldie

It's all good, my braddah!
Approaching 2 months of sobriety and feeling good.
I was wrapping up a project so my gym time suffered the last 2 weeks.
Back at it tomorrow.

I agree the "Alcohol and sleep" thread brought out some interesting comments on what people consider "a drinking problem".
I got it as far as people saying "he was only asking a question about sleep" but come on, for those of us that have faced the battle it's the regular excessive consumption of alcohol that spells doom. Old Supe nailed it as far as I was concerned. I think your right, Baldie, after 50 it's hard to BS about reality and we tend to call a spade a spade.
We probably have all been masters of denial at some time in our lives and the healing can't take place until we face the fact that we have a problem.
I could easily excuse away a lot of my behavior because I didn't hit some of the typical destructive benchmarks of the problem but it didn't change the fact that I was slowly killing myself. No DUI's, I have always been commended for my performance in a stress mill of a profession but it didn't change the fact that I was on the road to hell.
I wnated to shoot you all a sunset photo but the files are too big.
Here are some other Big Island shots. That's my daughter chanting at a hula performance.
Aloha,
Nalu

[chodan9]

Jonathan...that bottom is a scary place. Those of us who have had black outs, lost their business, and peed blood want to scream...STOP NOW...YOU DO NOT WANT TO GO THERE. But then as we know, each must experience life's gutter on their own. It is human nature to think..."no, not me".

That trool who started the Alcohol or Sleep thread in the open Forum really brought out some alkies in denial...ya think?

Baldie

My bottom was hit at a relatively young age, yet that doesn't lessen its impact.
I was suffering from hardcore narcotics withdrawal, I had been mainlining dilaudid, morphine, percodan etc, I weighed 128 pounds fully clothed, I couldn't string together 3 words coherently, my family had all but given up on me, and rightly so. I had lost my business, and I was dying.
But I was at the bottom where I needed to be, the nice thing about the bottom is it takes away all the questions, at least for me it did. No more "do I really need help?" or "am I really that bad off?" just push me in the right direction (heck ANY direction) and I will go.
I had assumed I was just going to die, but I never could seem to manage to die, I always woke up one more day in hell.
I look back at that life now after 19 years 10 months and 28 days clean and sober, and its like watching a movie about some poor addicted slob.

It would have been nice to have an early warning like "its interfering with sleep" and to have had the mental wherewithal to see that sign and take action based on that. But I know the addictive mind, it rationalizes, minimizes, and flat out lies to itself so that it gets what it wants.

[mfactor1]

Just a question that has been with me over the years, having been a heavy drinker in the past, now more of a social drinker, Its about giving up completely ie AA. If you are out for a meal and you cant even have one drink surely then even tho you are clean and sober alcohol still controls your life, my idea of beating alcoholism would be to have a cold beer on a hot day or a glass of wine with your partner without wanting to get drunk, not having a go, i am genuinely interested in your thoughts.

[GreenWave1]

Just a question that has been with me over the years, having been a heavy drinker in the past, now more of a social drinker, Its about giving up completely ie AA. If you are out for a meal and you cant even have one drink surely then even tho you are clean and sober alcohol still controls your life, my idea of beating alcoholism would be to have a cold beer on a hot day or a glass of wine with your partner without wanting to get drunk, not having a go, i am genuinely interested in your thoughts.

In a perfect world this would be possible. For most though, it is playing with fire. That's the thing about addiction, you can be in recovery, but you are still an addict. It's a question of who is in control: you, or your addiction.

[chodan9]

Just a question that has been with me over the years, having been a heavy drinker in the past, now more of a social drinker, Its about giving up completely ie AA. If you are out for a meal and you cant even have one drink surely then even tho you are clean and sober alcohol still controls your life, my idea of beating alcoholism would be to have a cold beer on a hot day or a glass of wine with your partner without wanting to get drunk, not having a go, i am genuinely interested in your thoughts.

If you look at alcoholism as a disease (and I am not going to debate that point) then you can see it as an abnormal reaction to alcohol. I wouldn't ask a diabetic to suddenly be able to control their insulin problems by force of will.

Besides the point of my recovery has never been to "beat" alcoholism, or somehow overcome booze. If I had the ability to do that I would not be an alcoholic.
Alcohol is a drug just like heroin, not everyone who tries heroin becomes and addict, not everyone who tries drinking becomes addicted. Yet no one would ask a recovering heroin addict to "just have a recreational hit of smack on the weekend". To an outsider that might sound like a ridiculous comparison, but to the recovering person they are parallel situations.

Look at it this way
a non alcoholic never has to concern themselves with beating alcohol, they aren't alcoholic, there is nothing to "beat". The only people who even have to deal with the concept are alcoholics. Thats why non-alcoholics cannot understand someone who is unable to not drink, and thats also why there are very few effective counselors who are not in recovery.

Today I live with alcoholism, clean and sober, I do not concern myself with whether I have beaten inanimate objects (alcohol and drugs)

[BigDaddy33]

Just a question that has been with me over the years, having been a heavy drinker in the past, now more of a social drinker, Its about giving up completely ie AA. If you are out for a meal and you cant even have one drink surely then even tho you are clean and sober alcohol still controls your life, my idea of beating alcoholism would be to have a cold beer on a hot day or a glass of wine with your partner without wanting to get drunk, not having a go, i am genuinely interested in your thoughts.

I have tried to be a "normal" drinker several times in the past and failed. I could never have "one" it was always more. So for me its simple, No drinks, or No Life! The first drink is the one that gets me drunk. If I never pick it up I'll never be drunk again. I have'nt picked it up today!! Alcohol does in a way control my life, since I have been sober, my life has gotten better, and its only been 3+months. So I'm am cautiously looking forward to the next 3 months....

[chodan9]

I have tried to be a "normal" drinker several times in the past and failed. I could never have "one" it was always more. So for me its simple, No drinks, or No Life! The first drink is the one that gets me drunk. If I never pick it up I'll never be drunk again. I have'nt picked it up today!! Alcohol does in a way control my life, since I have been sober, my life has gotten better, and its only been 3+months. So I'm am cautiously looking forward to the next 3 months....

KCB!

[plaskowski2002]

i had to stop my dymethazine cycle at day 12 wich was two days ago. i was having some nasty side affects like depression, mood swings and anxiety. my girlfriend was able to help me identify these problems by letting me know what a dick i have become. the feeling and moods i was having was a recipe for disaster. im closing on 3 years sober and it can be over in the blink of an eye. im feeling much better and back to normal. im glad i was able to stop because when i got sober bodybuilding has become kind of a replacement for booze and weed. just like my drinking im all in. there seems to be no middle area its all or nothing so finding a balance is hard and im still working on that. i am very obsessive with getting huge. im just rambling on but earlier in the thread there was talk about having to watch supplemtation and you bet your ass you do. like stimulant type products could trigger things in people who used to abuse uppers like crack, coke,meth etc. ok im done now. thanks everyone for listening or not listening. im so glad i found this thread.
thanks baldie!

[bjc12]

i had to stop my dymethazine cycle at day 12 wich was two days ago. i was having some nasty side affects like depression, mood swings and anxiety. my girlfriend was able to help me identify these problems by letting me know what a dick i have become. the feeling and moods i was having was a recipe for disaster. im closing on 3 years sober and it can be over in the blink of an eye. im feeling much better and back to normal. im glad i was able to stop because when i got sober bodybuilding has become kind of a replacement for booze and weed. just like my drinking im all in. there seems to be no middle area its all or nothing so finding a balance is hard and im still working on that. i am very obsessive with getting huge. im just rambling on but earlier in the thread there was talk about having to watch supplemtation and you bet your ass you do. like stimulant type products could trigger things in people who used to abuse uppers like crack, coke,meth etc. ok im done now. thanks everyone for listening or not listening. im so glad i found this thread.
thanks baldie!

I can really relate. i can obsessive pretty quick too. you have proven to be a great example for me though in your process. shows me that i have to keep my recovery as my first priority, just like you did when you stopped your cycle. glad you got on and rambled, i was listening and will definately take note. thanks buddy!

[Nalu]

I can really relate. i can obsessive pretty quick too. you have proven to be a great example for me though in your process. shows me that i have to keep my recovery as my first priority, just like you did when you stopped your cycle. glad you got on and rambled, i was listening and will definately take note. thanks buddy!

It seems like we all share the same road.