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She won't be when I'm done

Dem people are savages!


Lol

How could you ever pick

"Human"

Do you want another pandemic?


Because that's how you get another pandemic

My opa died at 94 a few years back. Ate everything fried in butter, dutch cheese, white bread, smoked heavily since he was 16, and didn't exercise.

Lived on his own till a month before he passed...

Taylor Swift?


Would rather fuk Taylor Momsen

What type of broke ass sloot can't come up with $100 and needs to suck dik to borrow it?

Lol

Dewalt??

Hilti and Milwaukee are disappoint, maskbrah

The part below Canada, excluding Texas

Aged like warm apple pie

I'd rather fuk Matt Rife and I'm not even gay

My wife is 5'4" and 115 lbs, same as her sister and mom.


I wasn't marrying some thing that was going to turn into a land whale in 5 years.

Well, it killed my grandpa, so...

My buddy's grandpa to his grandma when he opened the door to find my bud and his friends hotboxing the bathroom:

"Jesus fcucking Christ Irma, the kids are smokin opium!!!"

I spend a ton of time on the water fishing. No sunscreen crew.

But I do wear a hat, sunglasses, full neck and face buff, long sleeve and lightweight pants. No skin exposed.

It's actually goat...

You just have to watch put for the jew claw

Hadn't noticed

Well now it's:


"I cum blood"

I'd rather fuk the palm tree.