A Change has to begin soon...

Hey Everyone,

I am quite new at expressing... well anything about myself. I don't wanna bring anyone down or make them feel like I have it easy but I'm reaching out to the strong people.. Cause this forum seems to be fulled.

I have reached a breaking point in my life.. I wish I didnt have to break but I am.I am almost 21 and My life has always been in the shadows, No friends, confidence, motivation or a good mindset. I let myself turn into a overweight bag of depression. I am in a relationship I don't want because I'm afraid to leave( not only the guilt but also cause I moved to another country). I use to be in the Army but I quit for many stupid reasons. 1. Because I missed the girl I thought I loved (yeah I know very high school), and 2. was because I wasnt physically prepared, because of the combinations of fast food and smoking but laziness had to do alot with it. I failed everyone and myself, My life made me have alot of self doubt and I know if it doesn't stop Im gonna be a 40year old man in a bar drinking myself to death alone wondering what the hell happend.


* So Please anyone reading this that can help me out by atleast giving me advice, Options, Guiding information or anything Please message me*

I don't like to seem pushy about my thread. But maybe give it a read, it might give you some inspiration. It's posted in my signature.

I myself was feeling pretty bad for awhile, but decided to finally take control again and learn to live once more. It's easy to get into a rut, and unless something severe happens, change rarely happens.

My only advice I can give to you, is to dig deep and decide what you want. And just do it, don't think about it, or make excuses. Just do it and don't look back once you start.

set some short term and long term goals. get into a routine slowly that will help you achieve those. and prioritise what is most important to you. good luck

Dude, I know your pain...at least in a way. I struggled with depression all of my life, I felt like an outcast... never was really understood by anyone. I just think differently than most people, and I have always fought these "black moods"...

I was in the Navy, and my time there seemed to help and to not help. I used alcohol as a crutch for my pain, slept with as many girls as I could, just anything to fill that void I was carrying within. And when I got out, I was a wreck. I didn't want to go home because it reminded me of my old life, and of my dead Mother. I didn't have the desire to go anywhere or do anything. I could have let the suicidal thoughts just take me then and there.

It took years to cleanse myself of this feeling, and honestly.. there is no easy fix to it. You just have to slowly let go of the things that hurt you. You find something positive that you enjoy and use it to help heal your soul. In my situation, I started painting, writing, and it helped. I met a wonderful woman and got married, and she gave me even more strength.

And now I am working out again, trying to make my life the best it can be.

You just have to take every inch you can on the mountain of life. If you slip, you grasp a small crevice as tightly as you can and you pull yourself back up. Every enjoyment you can wring out of life, do it... use it as a support to help you up the mountain. Because our time at the peak is short, we have to enjoy the climb. It's all we have.