Printable View
To be honest, I felt bloated and disgusted. I kept checking the mirror and could swear I've immediately got an additional layer of fat around my belly.
I lifted better this morning than last week, but I keep telling myself that I'm just getting fat again
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485177151]How about tomorrow? Gotta start somewhere :)
I'm still just starting out myself![/QUOTE]
I'm desperate for that state of mind ..
I actually believe that I'm depressed and have zero motivation in hitting the gym.. I don't know how to convince myself to go to the gym and lift weights to be honest.. I don't know what's leading to this, whether it's the eating disorder or that I'm just depressed because of life in general.
[QUOTE=clk99;1485034901]It's completely okay to enjoy food. It [i]should[/i] be naturally enjoyed and many people here have struggled or currently struggle with grasping that concept.
The issue in your case is moderation. Staying up all night playing video games is damaging to your health and is a case of not exercising moderation in your enjoyment. Same goes for eating 1,000 or 10,000 calories a day.[/QUOTE]
Exactly but I know myself, I can't enjoy things in moderation, if I just eat bag of chocolate or a few bowls of cereal I just get sad, I just always want to go balls to wall for an unknown reason.
Binged again last night, my binge started around 1AM and ended up around 8AM with me pretty much zombie like standing in the kitchen just eating chocolate and candy, so tired and emotionless and just eating without enjoying at all at the end, felt horrible
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485178451]I'm desperate for that state of mind ..
I actually believe that I'm depressed and have zero motivation in hitting the gym.. I don't know how to convince myself to go to the gym and lift weights to be honest.. I don't know what's leading to this, whether it's the eating disorder or that I'm just depressed because of life in general.[/QUOTE]
How is your social life? Do you have some high-level life goals?
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485213071]How is your social life? Do you have some high-level life goals?[/QUOTE]
Social life is almost nonexistent because my friends go out at night .. which means they'll end up drinking and have dinner quite late .. I don't drink and i usually eat dinner between 6-7 pm ... so yeah .. it seems like almost zero social life ..
High level goals .. for sure .. just got a promotion at work haha
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485221101]Social life is almost nonexistent because my friends go out at night .. which means they'll end up drinking and have dinner quite late .. I don't drink and i usually eat dinner between 6-7 pm ... so yeah .. it seems like almost zero social life ..
High level goals .. for sure .. just got a promotion at work haha[/QUOTE]
Do you not have a good time going out if other people drink? I have a hard time with that also, so I understand. However, are there no other times, say, during the weekend when you can hang with friends in an environment where they're NOT drinking?
As far as your dinner time goes, what is the reason for making it a strict 6-7pm? Is that just during the week? If there's any room to incorporate more flexibility so you can get more time with friends, I'd say go for it. Otherwise, how is it you make/maintain friendships if they just go out drinking? How did you meet them or establish those connections?
Congrats on the promotion though!! Having goals for work and things other than food obsession is great.
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485221101]Social life is almost nonexistent because my friends go out at night .. which means they'll end up drinking and have dinner quite late .. I don't drink and i usually eat dinner between 6-7 pm ... so yeah .. it seems like almost zero social life ..
High level goals .. for sure .. just got a promotion at work haha[/QUOTE]
Why do not like drinking? There is nothing bad if u drink1-2 or if u even get hammered. For my example, alcohol is my trigger " food ". During my worst this is how my day looked like: I starved myselft to feel the "hunger high" i combinated that with 2 bottles of wine + a fkloads of *****. I have done this for 4 months straight. But sometimes i can go out and get a hard night with my friends without any problems, or any relapses.
[QUOTE=Grappa;1485238611]Why do not like drinking? There is nothing bad if u drink1-2 or if u even get hammered. For my example, alcohol is my trigger " food ". During my worst this is how my day looked like: I starved myselft to feel the "hunger high" i combinated that with [B]2 bottles of wine + a fkloads of *****[/B]. I have done this for 4 months straight. But sometimes i can go out and get a hard night with my friends without any problems, or any relapses.[/QUOTE]
Do not do this.
My brother died this way.
Drinking a bit is fine, if you want. I personally don't drink almost ever now, mainly because of my reflux and I always 'feel it' the next day, even after 2 drinks.
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485252311]Do not do this.
My brother died this way.
Drinking a bit is fine, if you want. I personally don't drink almost ever now, mainly because of my reflux and I always 'feel it' the next day, even after 2 drinks.[/QUOTE]
ofc you should not do this, but at that part of my life i did not care about my life at all. I just wanted to numb myself and escape from reality. But luckily it is the thing of the past. I still drink sometime, and yes sometimes i even get hammered, but that happens only whenone of my friend is having a bday party
^But also, this is cultuar. Here in europe we celebrate almost everything with alcohol. You can buy/drink alcohol, even strong ones at stupidly early age, mid highschool-senior year you constantly drink at fridays. It is really common. This is why i can tolerate alcohol really well, i only get hangover when i really go all in that night, but even after a bottle of wine i am not even drunk. On the other hand, what i have described, was my coping mechanism for stress, and i know it well this is not the way to solve stress, i can now manage stress luckily in another way. I had a really self destructive respond for all the crap what happened me back than. But god bless i was not get addicted to *****, or even alcoholic.
@grappa
True, Europe has a much more liberal drinking standard, and I don't see anything wrong with responsibly enjoying alcohol, but it's just not for me. I'd love to be able to drink a little here and there without feeling like crap, but I can't handle it anymore ;)
@AdamWW
I used to drink (maybe 6-7 years ago) and that's how we became friends.. I just don't like the taste of alcohol, in fact, i probably hate it haha.
We do try to hang out during the weekend, a cup of coffee in the afternoon, but my friends are mostly owls haha... they go out during the night, start off at a lounge or bar and then dinner at around 11-12 PM.
The main reason why I have my dinner between 6-7 during the weekdays + weekend is because by that time, i'm extremely hungry (satiety issue). Additionally, I wake up at around 4:30 AM for work, hence I sleep early, at around 9 - 10 pm max (i actually pass out by that time haha).
It's just that my time schedule does not match with my friend's unfortunately. and my hunger just doesn't allow me to go past 7-8 pm without affecting my 'mood' haha. <<<< the term HANGRY applies to me here.
So yeah ... I'm going on a trip this weekend (tomorrow infact) with a few friends so that will hopefully help.
MT
@Grappa
nothing wrong with drinking man haha .. I just don't enjoy it at all. i get a gag reflex from it.
MT
Never again will I eat brussels sprouts... just 4 with my dinner last night and I feel like im going to explode...
WTF... this is horrible.. I can't even stomach food without feeling uncomfortable the bloating is so intense.
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485306051]Never again will I eat brussels sprouts... just 4 with my dinner last night and I feel like im going to explode...
WTF... this is horrible.. I can't even stomach food without feeling uncomfortable the bloating is so intense.[/QUOTE]
haha!
I'm bloated all day, every day :) .. It doesn't bother me anymore! got used to it!
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485306771]haha!
I'm bloated all day, every day :) .. It doesn't bother me anymore! got used to it![/QUOTE]
This would.. it's not like a 'oh i feel full' feeling... it's borderline painful... presses my gut out but also presses up on my diaphragm so I feel nauseous.
Ugh...
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485307091]This would.. it's not like a 'oh i feel full' feeling... it's borderline painful... presses my gut out but also presses up on my diaphragm so I feel nauseous.
Ugh...[/QUOTE]
oh ouch!
Imagine my situation then .. protein fluff, greek yoghurt, 400 grams of strawberry, 500 grams of carrots, puffed wheat, rice cakes, 400 grams of lettuce and ~300 grams of chicken, cereal, ice cream/chocolate, protein bar .. all consumed in one sitting just to feel full :)
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485307781]oh ouch!
Imagine my situation then .. protein fluff, greek yoghurt, 400 grams of strawberry, 500 grams of carrots, puffed wheat, rice cakes, 400 grams of lettuce and ~300 grams of chicken, cereal, ice cream/chocolate, protein bar .. all consumed in one sitting just to feel full :)[/QUOTE]
Wait, why are you eating just to feel full? Or do you mean that's how much it just happens to take?
Don't get me wrong my capacity is huge, but there's a difference between THIS kind of bloat and being full...
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485307881]Wait, why are you eating just to feel full? Or do you mean that's how much it just happens to take?
Don't get me wrong my capacity is huge, but there's a difference between THIS kind of bloat and being full...[/QUOTE]
Because of hunger .. That's how much I would need to eat to feel full/satisfied .. or else i'll remain hungry and i fear that would probably lead to a binge ..
speaking of binges .. I've been fighting the urge to binge for weeks now!
Just wanted to add: I remember when I used to struggle extreme hunger, urges to binge and obsessive thinking of food. I could have put down a HUGE amount of food. My stomach felt like a bottomless pit. But it's all the doings of your brain. It senses that there is not a lot of weight on your body and it signals accordingly.
I thought these feelings would never go away. I thought I would be stuck eating high volume foods forever. But I'm here to say that that's no longer the case for me. I'm feel very full nowadays. Food is often the last thing on my mind. And it is so liberating. But it doesn't come without weight gain.
[QUOTE=Nate118;1485318621]Just wanted to add: I remember when I used to struggle extreme hunger, urges to binge and obsessive thinking of food. I could have put down a HUGE amount of food. My stomach felt like a bottomless pit. But it's all the doings of your brain. It senses that there is not a lot of weight on your body and it signals accordingly.
I thought these feelings would never go away. I thought I would be stuck eating high volume foods forever. But I'm here to say that that's no longer the case for me. I'm feel very full nowadays. Food is often the last thing on my mind. And it is so liberating. But it doesn't come without weight gain.[/QUOTE]
That is exactly what i wanted to know. Whether weight gain will eventually help with satiety or not? I'm wondering whether its the low weight (currently 67 KG at a height of 175 cm) or stomach capacity that I'm struggling with?
MT
@MT
It's funny. I had convinced myself that I was extremely hungry because I had stretched my stomach. I now believe that this is nonsense. In my situation, weight gain helped with hunger.
Weight gain helps with satiety, especially fat gain. Fat cells signal to the hypothalamus of the brain. If you have too few fat cells, you will have lower levels of the hormone leptin. You might feel like you are starving. When you gain fat, your leptin levels increase and you feel more and more full.
Of course you may still feel hungry if you still have periods of restriction or are coming off of a long period of restriction.
@Nate118
That makes a lot of sense mate.
What were your initial stats when you were feeling thing? weight? height?
And how many KGs/LBs did it take for that feeling to go away? I literally can't remember the last time i felt 'satisfied' without having to go down the 'volume food' route.
[QUOTE=AdamWW;1485306051]Never again will I eat brussels sprouts... just 4 with my dinner last night and I feel like im going to explode...
WTF... this is horrible.. I can't even stomach food without feeling uncomfortable the bloating is so intense.[/QUOTE]
My advice: Gain weight on fun foods, not veggies. Buy a powdered suppliment drink it and bam u got all your veggies
[quote=nate118;1485320681]@mt
it's funny. I had convinced myself that i was extremely hungry because i had stretched my stomach. I now believe that this is nonsense. In my situation, weight gain helped with hunger.
Weight gain helps with satiety, especially fat gain. Fat cells signal to the hypothalamus of the brain. If you have too few fat cells, you will have lower levels of the hormone leptin. You might feel like you are starving. When you gain fat, your leptin levels increase and you feel more and more full.
Of course you may still feel hungry if you still have periods of restriction or are coming off of a long period of restriction.[/quote]
this!!!!
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485324141]@Nate118
That makes a lot of sense mate.
What were your initial stats when you were feeling thing? weight? height?
And how many KGs/LBs did it take for that feeling to go away? I literally can't remember the last time i felt 'satisfied' without having to go down the 'volume food' route.[/QUOTE]
It depends on an individiual. I had to gain 10-12 kg to feel normal hunger/fullness again. Before that i was a living endless pit, i am amazed now how the fk was i able to eat that much.
[QUOTE=Grappa;1485325841]It depends on an individiual. I had to gain 10-12 kg to feel normal hunger/fullness again. Before that i was a living endless pit, i am amazed now how the fk was i able to eat that much.[/QUOTE]
oh wow! it never occured to me to be honest!
It's just the fear of gaining weight/fat that is stopping me.
I would want to gain weight with strength in the gym, hence muscle at least but i have no desire to go the gym at all!
[QUOTE=Grappa;1485325561]My advice: Gain weight on fun foods, not veggies. Buyy a powdered suppliment drink it and bam u got all your veggies[/QUOTE]
I only ate a few of them and they had sauce on them. The vast majority of my food is more calorie dense but I enjoy my veggies. Just never though such a small amount would do that.
[QUOTE=MosToorani;1485326171]oh wow! it never occured to me to be honest!
It's just the fear of gaining weight/fat that is stopping me.
I would want to gain weight with strength in the gym, hence muscle at least but i have no desire to go the gym at all![/QUOTE]
Definitely depends on the individual, how long they restricted, their current weight and body fat, and the severity of the food restriction they had. Some people normalize in weeks, some people takes months or over a year. The longer or more severe the restriction, usually the longer the recovery to reach your 'set point'
Also keep in mind the lack of motivation and energy is a sign you're not there yet
@MT
I gained 55 pounds before I felt normal. Body fat and body comp redistributes with hormones improving and it takes time. That is why it is so important to build your life up somewhere outside of food and fitness.
@AdamWW
What does a REAL day of eating look like to you?
[QUOTE=sonnydfrizzy;1485366651]@MT
I gained 55 pounds before I felt normal. Body fat and body comp redistributes with hormones improving and it takes time. That is why it is so important to build your life up somewhere outside of food and fitness.
@AdamWW
What does a REAL day of eating look like to you?[/QUOTE]
oh wow .. i guess you were extremely thin and restrictive?
what do you mean by body fat redistributes with hormones improving? since the day i've gain a few kgs back (i'm not complaining haha), it all went into my gut haha
MT