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onmyway01
06-11-2014, 06:35 PM
Here's a question for the over 35' misc, many, if not most, of you have children. How would you handle a child being gay? Let's keep this PC free, and fell free to express your thoughts if you do have children. I posed the same thread in the teen misc, but expect to get different answers from those of you who are actually old/mature enough to have had children. Any experiences with this, or your thoughts if your child came out to you?

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 06:41 PM
In B4 Bodyhard

apmark
06-11-2014, 06:44 PM
I'd ask "Are you happy"? Honestly I'd probably already know.

NorwichGrad
06-11-2014, 06:45 PM
I got two kids.. boy and girl.

I'd still love them no matter what..


I used to be a homophobe growing up. Not an excuse, but the culture I grew up in basically looked down on gays and lesbians.. As I grew older in the US my views have changed. They are people, too. I served with them, I work with them, and some have become good friends..


I don't have anything against anybody. People should be free to do what they want, as long as they hurt no one. My only beef (no pun intended) about this gay rights thing is when the government forces everyone else to accept them. I accept them on my own accord, on my own free will. Any time the government forces people to 'accept' anything, it is simply wrong.. We are individuals. We should not be categorized into groups, or worse - placed in protected class.

Phattso
06-11-2014, 06:46 PM
http://i1119.photobucket.com/albums/k621/MarkOne1/Biden.jpg (http://s1119.photobucket.com/user/MarkOne1/media/Biden.jpg.html)

Fishman15
06-11-2014, 06:51 PM
Kind of hung up on gay threads are we OP? I didn't bother going into page 2 of your post record...page 1 was a perfect 100% in gayness...

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 06:54 PM
Kind of hung up on gay threads are we OP? I didn't bother going into page 2 of your post record...page 1 was a perfect 100% in gayness...

Maybe he's trying to come out of the closet.

frozensparky
06-11-2014, 06:55 PM
The only thing that would upset me is I would know my child would have a tougher time in life because of the way people still feel towards gays. It would not bother me to have a gay son or daughter though.

GuyJin
06-11-2014, 07:10 PM
Maybe he's trying to come out of the closet.
---

I think he already did, and considering you used a quote by Oscar Wilde, CBB, I might be suspectin' U!
:D

(Not serious)

OP, you said you were gay. Fine. Are you happy that way? If you are, enjoy your life. You are what you are. And to answer your question, I'd agree with frozensparky. I have two sons, and if they happened to be so inclined that way, I'd love them all the same. They're my children. My wife and I made them. I would be feel bad for them, though, as society being what it is they would always be shunted (metaphorically speaking), however slightly, to the edge of the mainstream simply because of what they are. That they are bi-racial and living in Japan has already shunted them, however imperceptibly, to the side, mainly because people here have a hard time accepting that which is different, even if only by a little.

onmyway01
06-11-2014, 07:30 PM
Kind of hung up on gay threads are we OP? I didn't bother going into page 2 of your post record...page 1 was a perfect 100% in gayness...

Do you search everyone's post history before responding to a thread? Just curious? I find it interesting to discuss different views with different types of people. I enjoy lifting, and I've found myself of the age between the teen misc and the over 35 misc. I thought to pose this question here because those over the age of 35 are more likely to have experienced such a situation. Yes, you are correct, I enjoy posting, and find interesting, threads that affect myself directly, i.e. threads about being gay. I'm sorry if this offends you, but then again, no one made you click on this thread, or search my post history :)



---

I think he already did, and considering you used a quote by Oscar Wilde, CBB, I might be suspectin' U!
:D

(Not serious)

OP, you said you were gay. Fine. Are you happy that way? If you are, enjoy your life. You are what you are. And to answer your question, I'd agree with frozensparky. I have two sons, and if they happened to be so inclined that way, I'd love them all the same. They're my children. My wife and I made them. I would be feel bad for them, though, as society being what it is they would always be shunted (metaphorically speaking), however slightly, to the edge of the mainstream simply because of what they are. That they are bi-racial and living in Japan has already shunted them, however imperceptibly, to the side, mainly because people here have a hard time accepting that which is different, even if only by a little.

Yes, I'm gay and I'm out. My parents were fine with it. As I'm sure many people of your age know (no offense), they know their children better than they know themselves. My parents knew since I was about 5 years old. It took them another 15 years to ask ( I was'nt one to tell), and they were fine with it.

latebloomingmom
06-11-2014, 07:34 PM
yes but hon this is just speculation on our part..unles we really did have a child that came out of closet so to speak..

SP1966
06-11-2014, 07:36 PM
So long as they don't grow up to be RubberPig I'll be happy.

Geoff Richards
06-11-2014, 07:41 PM
Maybe he's trying to come out of the closet.

should just be a matter of pushing the door i'd imagine

onmyway01
06-11-2014, 07:46 PM
yes but hon this is just speculation on our part..unles we really did have a child that came out of closet so to speak..

true, but as to my original post, I'd wager that more people in the over 35 misc have children to "speculate" about than the teen misc. And I wonder how many parents do really "speculate" about such things, I'm sure mine did

latebloomingmom
06-11-2014, 07:52 PM
true, but as to my original post, I'd wager that more people in the over 35 misc have children to "speculate" about than the teen misc. And I wonder how many parents do really "speculate" about such things, I'm sure mine did
hmmmm...
I have two sons
one is 21 and married
and one is 13 and lives with me
raised the same way
they know how to hunt, cook, do laundry, clean their rooms, bake cookies and respect their mama..

my oldest is expecting a son in october so no use speculating on that one :)

how would I feel if my youngest came out and told me..well his father would go thru roof
me? I love my sons..no matter what

Warms
06-11-2014, 07:53 PM
Here's a question for the over 35' misc, many, if not most, of you have children. How would you handle a child being gay? Let's keep this PC free, and fell free to express your thoughts if you do have children. I posed the same thread in the teen misc, but expect to get different answers from those of you who are actually old/mature enough to have had children. Any experiences with this, or your thoughts if your child came out to you?

Honestly I would be fine with it weather they were gay or straight as long as they are happy. I have a boyfriend and my parents are fine with it. They would like for me to be with a woman but like they told be they can't tell me who to be with.

Fishman15
06-11-2014, 07:56 PM
Do you search everyone's post history before responding to a thread? Just curious? I find it interesting to discuss different views with different types of people. I enjoy lifting, and I've found myself of the age between the teen misc and the over 35 misc. I thought to pose this question here because those over the age of 35 are more likely to have experienced such a situation. Yes, you are correct, I enjoy posting, and find interesting, threads that affect myself directly, i.e. threads about being gay. I'm sorry if this offends you, but then again, no one made you click on this thread, or search my post history :)


Yes, I'm gay and I'm out. My parents were fine with it. As I'm sure many people of your age know (no offense), they know their children better than they know themselves. My parents knew since I was about 5 years old. It took them another 15 years to ask ( I was'nt one to tell), and they were fine with it.

"Do you search everyone's post history before responding to a thread? Just curious?"

Only if I have a premonition about something and need to confirm it...

OK, you are out and you and your family are all good with it. You wanted a non PC answer and I gave it to you. Would you rather have my blessing instead? Sorry, not going to happen...again not PC.

Old-Time-Lifter
06-11-2014, 07:58 PM
So long as they don't grow up to be RubberPig I'll be happy.

This ^^^^ QFT


I have a sister who is a lesbian, I always said that my Dad never cared that she was gay but it broke his heart that she was (and still is) a wigged out left wing liberal.

Who cares who you sleep with, but if you're voting for those libs you're disowned and out of the will.

Old-Time-Lifter
06-11-2014, 08:00 PM
true, but as to my original post, I'd wager that more people in the over 35 misc have children to "speculate" about than the teen misc. And I wonder how many parents do really "speculate" about such things, I'm sure mine did

Of course parents speculate, that's a foolish thing to even question. A parent speculates on every aspect of their children's lives, at least a good parent does.

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 08:15 PM
---

I think he already did, and considering you used a quote by Oscar Wilde, CBB, I might be suspectin' U!
:D

(Not serious)
http://mystudentapt.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/haters-gonna-hate-oscar-wilde.jpg

latebloomingmom
06-11-2014, 08:20 PM
"If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you"
Oscar Wilde

GuyJin
06-11-2014, 08:22 PM
http://mystudentapt.files.wordpress.com/2013/02/haters-gonna-hate-oscar-wilde.jpg
^^^

Sorry, Oscar.

:D

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 08:23 PM
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple. -Oscar Wilde

latebloomingmom
06-11-2014, 08:26 PM
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
Oscar Wilde

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 08:26 PM
^^^

Sorry, Oscar.

:Dhttp://s2.quickmeme.com/img/ea/ea63257e1596a5ec7f1b23d9d2f0a3748c47dc476926697c52 c43d552530e48a.jpg

latebloomingmom
06-11-2014, 08:27 PM
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
Oscar Wilde





hahaha..now this one I like :D

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 08:37 PM
http://1opx.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/oscar-wilde-quote_large.jpg

IronCharles
06-11-2014, 08:41 PM
Here's a question for the over 35' misc, many, if not most, of you have children. How would you handle a child being gay?

What exactly do you mean? Would I give them less chores because they had more peer pressure to deal with? Would I buy them a new car, because they weren't like most kids? What?

cowboybiker
06-11-2014, 08:42 PM
http://favimages.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/oscar-wilde-quotes-sayings-education-meaningful.jpg

onmyway01
06-11-2014, 09:09 PM
What exactly do you mean? Would I give them less chores because they had more peer pressure to deal with? Would I buy them a new car, because they weren't like most kids? What?

I think you know exactly what I mean, just look at other responses in this thread. But no, I would not expect anyone to treat their children any differntly based on their sexual preference. God knows I had no less chores (j/k I was the oldest, so I had the most chores of all)

onmyway01
06-11-2014, 09:10 PM
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
Oscar Wilde

LOL, I've gotta say, I'm quite uptight, but that quote made me smile :)

onmyway01
06-11-2014, 09:13 PM
hmmmm...
I have two sons
one is 21 and married
and one is 13 and lives with me
raised the same way
they know how to hunt, cook, do laundry, clean their rooms, bake cookies and respect their mama..

my oldest is expecting a son in october so no use speculating on that one :)

how would I feel if my youngest came out and told me..well his father would go thru roof
me? I love my sons..no matter what

You sound like you have a wonderful life :) I wish you all the best

onmyway01
06-11-2014, 09:36 PM
But anyways, this thread was serious. What would you guys over 35+ do if your child/adult child did come out and tell you they were gay?

fingolfin34
06-11-2014, 09:40 PM
I think it would be easier for the child to deal with society today than even 10 years ago, however I would be more concerned about the inner turmoil that would go through his or her (yes, I have both) head during the period of self-discovery. I am married to a wonderful woman, and I happen to consider myself a bisexual man. I ventured down the terrible path of deep depression as I realized that I was attracted to boys during my adolescence. It wasn't fun. I didn't ever open up to anyone about these feelings until I my spouse. She has been very supportive and has helped me understand myself. I am not 'out' because I feel that I really don't need to be. At some point, I will probably have 'the conversation' with members of my family that I feel need to know.

I want to be there for my children in an emotionally present way that my parents (father especially) were not, regardless of sexual identity. Time will tell if I can live up to it.

JediRN
06-11-2014, 10:24 PM
But anyways, this thread was serious. What would you guys over 35+ do if your child/adult child did come out and tell you they were gay?

I was raised to be very homophobic and probably will always feel that way inside. (no hate, just being honest) I would be terribly upset and grossed out but I'd get over it because that's my problem and not his. Too the best of my ability I would act like it was a non-issue...because that's what it is.

jeffaus
06-11-2014, 10:53 PM
I couldn't care less either way OP, my daughter will always have my love. If my daughter lives a happy, healthy and productive life, then I will be a very happy father regardless of whether she is hetrosexual, homosexual or bisexual.

steffo99
06-11-2014, 11:07 PM
I'd initially be a bit disappointed maybe but I wouldn't love my kid any less.

hmmmm16417
06-12-2014, 12:25 AM
Maybe he's trying to come out of the closet.
as long as they were old enough to actually make that decision on their own.

if one of my children came to me at the age of 5-10 and said "i'm gay" , i would have an issue with it because they have no clue!

if my 19 yr old son said the same, I would question it but he is free to make his own choices....however i would be disappointed to not eventually have grandchildren from him.

with that said, when i see these articles about "transgender" children in school (about age 8) being promoted by their parents as such, it makes me sick!!! because at such a young age it is a LEARNED trait. I feel that homosexuality cannot be considered until puberty otherwise it's not natural.

and before people start bashing me, I have several gay friends and when my wife met me she even commented that I had more gay friends than straight ones LOL Many of them are successful professionals....although there were a few that were a bit flakey hahahah but i will tell you what, they def. party hard and can be a lot of fun. Have even been to a local gay bar with them in the past (before meeting my wife)....and you would be amazed on how many gorgeous STRAIGHT women go to a gay bar ;-) of course they naturally thought i was gay and didn't expect me to hit on them hahaha

GuyJin
06-12-2014, 02:59 AM
...when i see these articles about "transgender" children in school (about age 8) being promoted by their parents as such, it makes me sick!!! because at such a young age it is a LEARNED trait. I feel that homosexuality cannot be considered until puberty otherwise it's not natural.
---

Here, I'm going to disagree with you. If being gay/lesbian is innate (i.e. hardwired from birth and I believe it is, then being transgendered is the same. There are a number of articles on the Net saying the same thing, and before anyone says those doctors have an agenda going on, I'll just say that maybe they do. Some of them. Same deal with the conservatives who think that you can "pray the gay away" when you can't. What it comes down to is not how you or I feel, but what is, and how those individuals think and feel about themselves and how they identify themselves as being this or that gender.

Agreed that eight or so is very young, but from the literature I've read and the people I've communicated with online (research) they just 'knew' they identified as the opposite gender from a very early age. No, I can't explain it, but I do believe transgenderism, while relatively rare vis-a-vis the entire world's population, is something that one is wired with from birth, so to speak, same as being gay, straight, or bisexual. Unlike some others, I don't believe in gender fluidity up until a certain age. That view is promoted by some out there which I do not agree with, but that's just me.

bodyhard
06-12-2014, 05:05 AM
Unfortunately my four sons turned out gay, so I disowned them and adopted four real boys, all is back to normal now.

Capt_Lou
06-12-2014, 05:49 AM
Unfortunately my four sons turned out gay, so I disowned them and adopted four real boys, all is back to normal now.

I took mine out back and beat them since being gay is a disease.

latebloomingmom
06-12-2014, 06:00 AM
I took mine out back and beat them since being gay is a disease.if its a disease maybe ya should have gave them some bad medicine ;)
eOUtsybozjg

bodyhard
06-12-2014, 06:30 AM
I tried that. But it didn't work. Best recourse was to remove the dreaded disease, hence all is good at the bodyhard home

quicksand jesus
06-12-2014, 06:38 AM
Here's a question for the over 35' misc, many, if not most, of you have children. How would you handle a child being gay? Let's keep this PC free, and fell free to express your thoughts if you do have children. I posed the same thread in the teen misc, but expect to get different answers from those of you who are actually old/mature enough to have had children. Any experiences with this, or your thoughts if your child came out to you?

Love is love.

Capt_Lou
06-12-2014, 07:37 AM
if its a disease maybe ya should have gave them some bad medicine ;)
eOUtsybozjg

Only medicine that they needed was a stiff hand across the mouth.


I tried that. But it didn't work. Best recourse was to remove the dreaded disease, hence all is good at the bodyhard home

Step 2 was taking them to a brothel and making them have sweet sweet love to 100 women.

DuracellBunny
06-12-2014, 08:06 AM
What I wouldn't do is post a picture of myself including my face on an internet forum asking questions like this. The potential for harm from asking the question in such a manner outweighs the potential benefit.

latebloomingmom
06-12-2014, 08:09 AM
You sound like you have a wonderful life :) I wish you all the bestthanks and right backatcha :)

Karl_Hungus
06-12-2014, 10:07 AM
with that said, when i see these articles about "transgender" children in school (about age 8) being promoted by their parents as such, it makes me sick!!!

Agreed -- an 8 year old brain is still largely undeveloped, and to trust a life altering decision to an 8-year old is ludicrous.


---

Here, I'm going to disagree with you. If being gay/lesbian is innate (i.e. hardwired from birth and I believe it is, then being transgendered is the same. There are a number of articles on the Net saying the same thing, and before anyone says those doctors have an agenda going on, I'll just say that maybe they do. Some of them. Same deal with the conservatives who think that you can "pray the gay away" when you can't. What it comes down to is not how you or I feel, but what is, and how those individuals think and feel about themselves and how they identify themselves as being this or that gender.


I am not drinking the Kool-Aid on the whole transgender thing. It is not in the same category as being gay/straight. I believe it to be a psychological disorder -- to believe otherwise is to accept the idea that it perfectly natural to want to mutilate one's own body in order to be at peace. Just think about that for a minute. Also, what does it mean to "feel" like a man or "feel" like a woman? Is it simply identifying with gender-stereotyped traits? Instead of undergoing surgery and hormone treatments in order to make their outward appearance congruent with societal male/female stereotypes -- it seems much more psychologically healthy to recognize that the masculine-feminine spectrum is widely represented in both genders. Some women have masculine traits and some men have feminine traits. A feminine man who undergoes surgery to become a woman is allowing societal roles to define him so strongly, that he is willing to cut off body parts in order to make his body fit with these roles. That is f'cked up IMO. It is much healthier for him to accept that he is a man with feminine traits, and that there is nothing wrong with that.

KeepItMoving
06-12-2014, 10:24 AM
What if I had a child who was homeless? What if I had a child who was an atheist? Who had a poor work ethic? Who disappointed me for failing to use his/her talents to the fulles? Who liked sex with animals? Who was a polygamist? Who converted to something I considerd to be a cult? Who killed someone? Who abused their spouse in some manner that I disagreed with?

I don't get this pop culture fascination with this particular life issue.

mendeldave
06-12-2014, 01:25 PM
I have twin toddlers. If either or both are gay and come out some day, it'll be totally fine with me. I come from a very understanding and supportive family, if I'd been gay, or if my younger brother or sister were, my parents would have been 100% fine. If my kids are, I'll also be 100% fine.

I just don't want them to be a$$holes, excessively violent, fat, lazy or uneducated. I don't care who they want to have sex with or get married to, but I WILL care if they're fat, lazy, stupid and don't ever try at life. I'll do what I can to make sure that sh*t doesn't happen!

onmyway01
06-12-2014, 01:45 PM
as long as they were old enough to actually make that decision on their own.

if one of my children came to me at the age of 5-10 and said "i'm gay" , i would have an issue with it because they have no clue!

if my 19 yr old son said the same, I would question it but he is free to make his own choices....however i would be disappointed to not eventually have grandchildren from him.

with that said, when i see these articles about "transgender" children in school (about age 8) being promoted by their parents as such, it makes me sick!!! because at such a young age it is a LEARNED trait. I feel that homosexuality cannot be considered until puberty otherwise it's not natural.

and before people start bashing me, I have several gay friends and when my wife met me she even commented that I had more gay friends than straight ones LOL Many of them are successful professionals....although there were a few that were a bit flakey hahahah but i will tell you what, they def. party hard and can be a lot of fun. Have even been to a local gay bar with them in the past (before meeting my wife)....and you would be amazed on how many gorgeous STRAIGHT women go to a gay bar ;-) of course they naturally thought i was gay and didn't expect me to hit on them hahaha

Good truthful response, but what does liking the same sex have to do with wanting to be the opposite sex? I've never understood why the two were lumped together, as if they are even remotely similar

onmyway01
06-12-2014, 01:47 PM
What if I had a child who was homeless? What if I had a child who was an atheist? Who had a poor work ethic? Who disappointed me for failing to use his/her talents to the fulles? Who liked sex with animals? Who was a polygamist? Who converted to something I considerd to be a cult? Who killed someone? Who abused their spouse in some manner that I disagreed with?

I don't get this pop culture fascination with this particular life issue.

It has nothing to do with "pop culture". You can try to sideline the question and belittle those who are gay all you want, but "pop culture" has nothing to do with it. I don't watch television, nor do I stay up to date on the latest trash/music that comes out of Hollywood, but here I am, gay as can be, and it can't be attributed to this "pop culture" you speak of. You're doing no one any good comparing things as you have.

tobymax123
06-12-2014, 02:24 PM
It has nothing to do with "pop culture". You can try to sideline the question and belittle those who are gay all you want, but "pop culture" has nothing to do with it. I don't watch television, nor do I stay up to date on the latest trash/music that comes out of Hollywood, but here I am, gay as can be, and it can't be attributed to this "pop culture" you speak of. You're doing no one any good comparing things as you have.

I think you completely misunderstood KeepItMoving's post. Nonetheless KIM, the reason LGBT non-discrimination is at the forefront of the news and cultural discussions is because it's the current civil rights battleground. Marriage equality is running its course through the courts in every state that doesn't yet have it. Non-discrimination legislation (or the opposite of that, the right to discriminate in some ultra conservative states) is also making it's way through the legislative process in cities, towns, and states. It's in the news because gay people finally stood up and said "enough", and have been coming out in numbers never seen before, simply being themselves instead of hiding who they are, and demanding equality instead of being relegated to second-class citizen status on the sidelines of our culture and society.



Good truthful response, but what does liking the same sex have to do with wanting to be the opposite sex? I've never understood why the two were lumped together, as if they are even remotely similar

I agree. But for better or worse, the "T" was added to LGBT, bringing transgendered people into the fold in our fight for equal civil rights.

GuyJin
06-12-2014, 03:12 PM
I am not drinking the Kool-Aid on the whole transgender thing. It is not in the same category as being gay/straight. I believe it to be a psychological disorder -- to believe otherwise is to accept the idea that it perfectly natural to want to mutilate one's own body in order to be at peace. Just think about that for a minute. Also, what does it mean to "feel" like a man or "feel" like a woman? Is it simply identifying with gender-stereotyped traits? Instead of undergoing surgery and hormone treatments in order to make their outward appearance congruent with societal male/female stereotypes -- it seems much more psychologically healthy to recognize that the masculine-feminine spectrum is widely represented in both genders. Some women have masculine traits and some men have feminine traits. A feminine man who undergoes surgery to become a woman is allowing societal roles to define him so strongly, that he is willing to cut off body parts in order to make his body fit with these roles. That is f'cked up IMO. It is much healthier for him to accept that he is a man with feminine traits, and that there is nothing wrong with that.
---

You used the term "mutilation". By the same token, I could say that a woman who wants breast augmentation, liposuction, and any number of cosmetic surgeries is mutilating themselves. Same for a guy who has his dick enlarged or has plastic surgery on his face/body to achieve the 'ideal' look. Then there are a number of piercings I've seen in rather sensitive places...could that not be considered mutilation as well?

As for identifying as either a male or female, good point. However, I would point out that gender dysphoria is a recognized psychological term and not of Mr. Koolaid's imagination. I can't begin to understand how a person in that situation might feel, but from what my online transgendered acquaintances/friends tell me, it's a very uncomfortable and even shattering realization. I don't expect you to take what I say as gospel, but this is my experience after doing the research, so call it that and nothing more.

The final line you wrote "It is much healthier for him to accept that he is a man with feminine traits"...healthier for whom, I wonder? For the male who identifies as a female and is forced by society to hide his orientation, or for the straight people out there who pretend that such a thing doesn't exist? For centuries people who did have this problem of gender identification had to live lies, pretend to be something they were not, and now they don't have to. In your mind, perhaps, a guy who identifies as a woman would be happier pretending to be a straight guy or a gay guy...and we all know how society feels about teh gays and lesbians. But what about him?

frozensparky
06-12-2014, 03:34 PM
Who abused their spouse in some manner that I disagreed with?

Is there a proper way to abuse ones spouse?

Geoff Richards
06-12-2014, 04:03 PM
Is there a proper way to abuse ones spouse?

I guess if they are into that sort of thing and it's mutual it could be considered proper

Karl_Hungus
06-12-2014, 04:34 PM
---
For centuries people who did have this problem of gender identification had to live lies, pretend to be something they were not, and now they don't have to. In your mind, perhaps, a guy who identifies as a woman would be happier pretending to be a straight guy or a gay guy...and we all know how society feels about teh gays and lesbians. But what about him?

I'd like to provide a detailed reply to your post because you touched on a number of different things, but alas, I am on my phone and will therefore comment on just the quoted portion. I think you may be misunderstanding what I am saying. I don't think anybody should pretend to be something they are not, but I have yet to hear a satisfying answer about what it means to "feel like a woman".....other than simply identifying with societal male/female roles. So IMO, you have it backwards. The man who "identifies as a woman" is pretending to be something they are not in order to match their body with their image of appropriate gender roles. If you are a man with feminine traits, then why not just accept it? Why pretend to be something you are not (a woman)? Acceptance of who you are seems (to me) like a healthier course of action then chopping off body parts and undergoing a lifetime of questionable hormone treatments.

Oceanside
06-12-2014, 04:37 PM
I won't lie...

I feel like a sexy bitch when I take my bubble bath every saturday night.

pvsampson
06-12-2014, 04:42 PM
Wow.Lot's of "gay" in the O35.

I remember when a *** was thrown on a fire,or here we hid from our parents when lighting one,and sitting on a poof was acceptable whilst having a Golden Gaytime.


EDIT: LOL at the censoring of a common term used for a piece of firewood.

Karl_Hungus
06-12-2014, 04:44 PM
I won't lie...

I feel like a sexy bitch when I take my bubble bath every saturday night.

Oh me too. Especially when I make fart bubbles like a dainty little woman.

Brackneyc
06-12-2014, 04:48 PM
But anyways, this thread was serious. What would you guys over 35+ do if your child/adult child did come out and tell you they were gay?


Only those who have been there can answer that.

gottobeme
06-12-2014, 04:54 PM
How would you handle a child being gay?

Same as would with a child who's heterosexual - with love.

pharmamarketer
06-12-2014, 06:38 PM
I would not care.

GuyJin
06-12-2014, 06:51 PM
IMO, you have it backwards. The man who "identifies as a woman" is pretending to be something they are not in order to match their body with their image of appropriate gender roles. If you are a man with feminine traits, then why not just accept it? Why pretend to be something you are not (a woman)? Acceptance of who you are seems (to me) like a healthier course of action then chopping off body parts and undergoing a lifetime of questionable hormone treatments.
--
Actually, I think you have it the wrong way. The transgendered woman, in his mind, is not pretending. They are simply identifying themselves as females. Not all gay guys (from my very limited understanding) identify that way. They are men who happen to find other men attractive in the physical and psychological sense, but they have no wish to become women. A transgendered person, OTOH, in my opinion (layperson's view) sees themselves as the opposite sex.

Your other statement of a man who has feminine traits accepting their 'role' (for lack of a better term) again begs the question: Who is this acceptable to? To society at large which from time immemorial has shunned that which is different in a sexual and (sometimes) racial/religious sense, or to the individual who is forced to live that way?

As for surgery and hormone treatments, to you it may seem unwise and unnecessary, but not for the person who willingly accepts the risks--and there ARE some very real risks associated with that treatment--of becoming what they wish to be.

tobymax123
06-12-2014, 07:27 PM
I'd like to provide a detailed reply to your post because you touched on a number of different things, but alas, I am on my phone and will therefore comment on just the quoted portion. I think you may be misunderstanding what I am saying. I don't think anybody should pretend to be something they are not, but I have yet to hear a satisfying answer about what it means to "feel like a woman".....other than simply identifying with societal male/female roles. So IMO, you have it backwards. The man who "identifies as a woman" is pretending to be something they are not in order to match their body with their image of appropriate gender roles. If you are a man with feminine traits, then why not just accept it? Why pretend to be something you are not (a woman)? Acceptance of who you are seems (to me) like a healthier course of action then chopping off body parts and undergoing a lifetime of questionable hormone treatments.

There are all kinds.

Johnny Weir is a perfect example of someone you describe; a man with feminine traits who just accepts it and doesn't pretend to be anything else. Did you see him doing coverage of the Kentucky Derby? Wow, what a hoot. I got a kick out of him being unabashedly who he is. But he (apparently) sees himself and identifies as a man, and as far as I know has not expressed any desire to be a woman.

On the other hand, the one person I actually know who made the surgical transition from male to female was not very feminine as a man. Now, after 19 years as a woman, she still is not very feminine. She tries, oh how she tries with the makeup and clothes, but she just doesn't have a fashion sense, and she does not walk or move in a typical feminine manner. But she is infinitely more happy now and has a wonderful joyous sensibility about life.

I can't explain or understand the whys/whats/hows of the whole transgender issue, and that's fine. Since I'm not transgender I don't need to understand it. I just need to take transgender people at their word that this is the way they are. Personally, as a gay man, I have ZERO desire to be, or dress like, or act like a woman.

Karl_Hungus
06-12-2014, 08:56 PM
--
Actually, I think you have it the wrong way. The transgendered woman, in his mind, is not pretending. They are simply identifying themselves as females.
.

Not being disrespectful ... but I don't think you are following the crux of my argument. What does it MEAN to "feel like a woman"? Or "identify as a female"? Aside from your societally-induced perception of what a woman is? I don't think you can divorce the two ...and if you can, I'd like to hear how they are different. Given that masculine/feminine feelings are widely represented in both sexes, and there are no traits exclusive to the other -- what is the difference between "feeling like a man" vs "feeling like a woman"? This is why I think the whole "transgendered" thing is a little flakey....and shouldn't really be lumped in with being gay or lesbian.

I think of it as being in the same category as "body integrity identity disorder", where one manifestation is to perceive oneself as being without limbs. They identify themselves as amputees. They feel like their arms and legs are not part of them, and they have a strong desire to cut them off. One solution is to indulge them, and allow them to cut off all of their limbs in order to bring their body in line with their mental image of themselves . They may be significantly happier if allowed to do that ... but I still view it as a psychological problem whose first course of action is psychological treatment rather than surgery.




On the other hand, the one person I actually know who made the surgical transition from male to female was not very feminine as a man. Now, after 19 years as a woman, she still is not very feminine. She tries, oh how she tries with the makeup and clothes, but she just doesn't have a fashion sense, and she does not walk or move in a typical feminine manner. But she is infinitely more happy now and has a wonderful joyous sensibility about life.


^^ But this also kind of makes my point. He wants to affect characteristics associated with a "woman". He WANTS to be feminine, but just isn't very good at it. What defines being a woman other than an identification with traditionally female traits?

Oceanside
06-12-2014, 09:00 PM
What defines being a woman other than an identification with traditionally female traits?

a vagina

Karl_Hungus
06-12-2014, 09:00 PM
a vagina

^^ This...lol. But what makes a man? Is it being prepared to do the right thing ... no matter the cost?

gQWGIzSGtOc

superman713
06-12-2014, 10:27 PM
It has nothing to do with "pop culture". You can try to sideline the question and belittle those who are gay all you want, but "pop culture" has nothing to do with it. I don't watch television, nor do I stay up to date on the latest trash/music that comes out of Hollywood, but here I am, gay as can be, and it can't be attributed to this "pop culture" you speak of. You're doing no one any good comparing things as you have.

Wait... You come to the ov35 and ask a question. I'm assuming you understand that you are going to receive responses that will align with your thinking and some that differ. No where in his post did he "belittle" anyone.

Obviously this is a topic that you hold close because you are in fact gay. Understandable. I myself would not love my children any less for any choice they make in life or for their sexual identity. I think the consensus is that we would love them the same either way.

As far as the civil rights thing... How is it equality if somebody beats the **** out of me its assault, if somebody beats the **** out of you its a hate crime and hold a stiffer penalty? That's not equal rights, that is total inequality. You can have a gay pride parade and it is celebrated, If there was a straight Christian pride parade it would be labeled intolerant and hateful. I think what he was trying to say about the "pop culture" aspect is that IT IS being brought to the forefront and is being exploited by media and entertainment. Gay men in movies and TV "pop culture" are represented by a cookie cutter personification of a flamboyant diva. I own a high end modern furniture store and work closely with gay men quite often... They are not represented in media correctly by any stretch of the imagination.

GuyJin
06-13-2014, 12:18 AM
Not being disrespectful ... but I don't think you are following the crux of my argument. What does it MEAN to "feel like a woman"? Or "identify as a female"? Aside from your societally-induced perception of what a woman is? I don't think you can divorce the two ...and if you can, I'd like to hear how they are different. Given that masculine/feminine feelings are widely represented in both sexes, and there are no traits exclusive to the other -- what is the difference between "feeling like a man" vs "feeling like a woman"? This is why I think the whole "transgendered" thing is a little flakey....and shouldn't really be lumped in with being gay or lesbian.

I think of it as being in the same category as "body integrity identity disorder", where one manifestation is to perceive oneself as being without limbs. They identify themselves as amputees. They feel like their arms and legs are not part of them, and they have a strong desire to cut them off. One solution is to indulge them, and allow them to cut off all of their limbs in order to bring their body in line with their mental image of themselves . They may be significantly happier if allowed to do that ... but I still view it as a psychological problem whose first course of action is psychological treatment rather than surgery.

---
To me, identifying oneself as a female is not only a mindset based on feminine attributes, but also a psychological state of 'being' for lack of a better word. In the case of a transgendered man, he is physically born a man with all the male attributes--penis, testicles, etc.--but has the mindset of a woman in that he believes he IS a woman. Many times (according to the literature and the testimonies of those who are transgendered) they have often said they were "stuck/born into the wrong body" or "trapped in the wrong body".

I realize this doesn't quite answer your question. I'd have to agree with you insofar as "feeling like a woman" and "identifying oneself as a woman (or man)" is largely a social construct. Where we differ is your claim that this is a mental illness in the manner of BIID. I don't think it is, per se. Could it be a chemical imbalance in the brain making the transgendered think as they do? Perhaps. Could it be a structural change in the brain, something which happened during gestation? This is one theory and falls in line with my earlier statement of them being wired differently. Honestly, I can't tell you, but to me, if you start with the premise that transgenderism is a mental illnesss, then this is a very slippery slope to head toward.

With respect to your earlier post, you mentioned mutilation. I suggested that feminine breast augmentation, liposuction, piercings in the clitoris (or penis for men) could also be seen as a form of mutilation. BIID is certainly indicative of that, but I might argue that some surgical procedures...even being addicted to surgery ("surgical addiction") is just as injurious and demonstrates a destructive mindset as opposed to transgender surgery which can be viewed as having a more constructive mindset. I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on that.

My original thoughts on all this are unchanged. Why should someone who identifies as a member of the opposite sex be forced to live a lie and not be allowed to undergo a procedure which makes them happier as individuals? Again, from all the literature I've read, transgendered women (far more than transgendered men, if the stats are right) suffer more socially when forced to live as men, effeminate men. Perhaps in your mind, they should be satisfied. But you are not they and you (and I) don't know how they truly feel. Should we be deciding for them? It's very easy for anyone to say "Yeah, let 'em dress like girls, let 'em believe they are, just don't come near me with that kinda thing" while shunting them to one side...but as for them achieving personal happiness...not a concern.

Sorry for the long post. Have to go out now to work, got my thoughts down as much as possible.

Karl_Hungus
06-13-2014, 02:25 AM
---
To me, identifying oneself as a female is not only a mindset based on feminine attributes, but also a psychological state of 'being' for lack of a better word. In the case of a transgendered man, he is physically born a man with all the male attributes--penis, testicles, etc.--but has the mindset of a woman in that he believes he IS a woman.

But what does the bolded mean apart from social constructs?


I realize this doesn't quite answer your question. I'd have to agree with you insofar as "feeling like a woman" and "identifying oneself as a woman (or man)" is largely a social construct. Where we differ is your claim that this is a mental illness in the manner of BIID. I don't think it is, per se.

How are they different?


With respect to your earlier post, you mentioned mutilation. I suggested that feminine breast augmentation, liposuction, piercings in the clitoris (or penis for men) could also be seen as a form of mutilation. BIID is certainly indicative of that, but I might argue that some surgical procedures...even being addicted to surgery ("surgical addiction") is just as injurious and demonstrates a destructive mindset as opposed to transgender surgery which can be viewed as having a more constructive mindset. I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on that.

Well -- Taken to an extreme (e.g. extreme body modification), I believe it is mutilation -- But where the above "enhancements" differ is that you aren't destroying functional parts of the human body in order to feel "complete". I think there is something psychologically wrong if you need to chop off arms, legs, or penises to be at peace with your body.


My original thoughts on all this are unchanged. Why should someone who identifies as a member of the opposite sex be forced to live a lie and not be allowed to undergo a procedure which makes them happier as individuals?

I didn't say any of that -- I just disagree that they are "living a lie"....any more than a person with BIID is "living a lie" if they don't chop off their arms and legs. I believe in both cases, there are similar underlying psychological issues. I'm not saying ban them from having surgery ... I just believe it to be a psychological issue and therefore not in the same ballpark as being gay/lesbian.

lemeseethem
06-13-2014, 02:31 AM
If my son grows up gay I'll still love him but if he's going to be suckin dink in college then he will pay his own rent.


I wouldn't pay my son's rent if all he was doing was fukkin sloots si no biggie lol

JediRN
06-13-2014, 02:53 AM
An interesting case study in gender identity that's semi-relavent.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John/Joan_case

cliffs
John is an identical twin
John has a botched circumcism.
John has his junk surgically modified to be a girl.
john is renamed Joan and raised as a girl and not told the truth.
Joan realizes in "her" teens that something is terribly wrong. she doesn't feel like a girl. Thinks she should be a guy.

Conclusion: People are born who they are and although "nurture" plays a role "nature" prevails.

GuyJin
06-13-2014, 03:43 AM
An interesting case study in gender identity that's semi-relavent.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John/Joan_case

cliffs
John is an identical twin
John has a botched circumcism.
John has his junk surgically modified to be a girl.
john is renamed Joan and raised as a girl and not told the truth.
Joan realizes in "her" teens that something is terribly wrong. she doesn't feel like a girl. Thinks she should be a guy.

Conclusion: People are born who they are and although "nurture" plays a role "nature" prevails.
--

In this case, David Reimer, the person who had the botched circumcision and was designated for sexual reassignment surgery, was, IMHO, used as a pawn by the doctor. The operation happened at the age of seven months. He was then forced by the doctor whom I believe was dead wrong to live a life as a gender he did NOT identify with. This was a tragedy for all concerned. And I'd agree. This is a case of nature being fukked with. A pity he got improper care...and I wouldn't even call it care.

GuyJin
06-13-2014, 03:57 AM
But what does the bolded mean apart from social constructs?
ME--It means what it says it means. By that, he identifies with acting like a woman in the sense of how women act in society. He sees his gender as that of being a woman. To the transgendered woman, my opinion, FWIW, is that whether it's a social construct or not, he believes that he is female. (Poor choice of words...I plead lack of sleep).


How are they different?
ME.--If you're talking about comparing BIID, you're talking about, I believe, a genuine psychological malady which involves destruction of bodily tissue that would make one fully functional (i.e. moving around) in everyday life. In the case of gender reassignment surgery, there is no deliberate loss of functionality. True, the penis is cut off and the testicles are removed in the case of many (not all) transgendered women, but that doesn't limit them in what they can do in today's world or getting around. BIID, taken to extremes, can and will limit mobility.


Well -- Taken to an extreme (e.g. extreme body modification), I believe it is mutilation -- But where the above "enhancements" differ is that you aren't destroying functional parts of the human body in order to feel "complete". I think there is something psychologically wrong if you need to chop off arms, legs, or penises to be at peace with your body.

ME--There is, to me, a huge difference in cutting off your limbs to feel better about your life as opposed to undergoing gender reassignment surgery. The key word here is "psychological". Whereas those with BIID are genuinely in need of counseling IMO, those with gender dysmorphia need counseling to ascertain whether they truly fit the criteria for hormonal treatment and surgery (should they wish it) and whether they are truly suffering from gender identity issues. I think many people here are channeling Buffalo Bill (not saying you are one of them) and somehow associating that fictional character with those who are truly in distress over their inability to be perceived as they wish to be perceived.


I didn't say any of that -- I just disagree that they are "living a lie"....any more than a person with BIID is "living a lie" if they don't chop off their arms and legs. I believe in both cases, there are similar underlying psychological issues. I'm not saying ban them from having surgery ... I just believe it to be a psychological issue and therefore not in the same ballpark as being gay/lesbian.

---ME. Fair enough. Let's agree to disagree on this.



---Karl, see above, please.

Demonchylde
06-13-2014, 05:02 AM
Been a while since I posted. (Work, Gym, eating...rinse repeat...little time) I have been lurking.

Sorry...I have to go into religion here because it's the only argument that I see as a common protest to homosexuality. I will keep it more based on fact, and this is not an attack.

I have been on FB and other media as part of my job recently and I see a polarization between people on this topic. Religion being a very common argument. However religion has changed and evolved in almost all but this specific topic. Even then the bible does a poor job of stating anything about it, and Jesus never mentioned it once.

My personal take is that they are your children. Your flesh and blood. if I felt a persons sexuality was a choice then obviously arguments could be made, but since I do believe it is genetic, and not environmental or learned behaviour, I would have to say that I would love my child regardless.

The religious argument I hear constantly seems to only apply with gay people, but lets not forget that Women were a target as well. There are a lot of very outspoken religious women out there, who if they were following their own religion would not be able to speak at all. In true and fair fact, in some religions today female infanticide is still practiced because religious sects prefer a son. While not likening female infanticide to someone loving their gay child, one needs to look at the aspect of abandonment. If I choose to ignore or disown my gay son or daughter, I am essentially killing that relationship based on how they were born. But there is a lot to be said about abandoning your child due to sexuality or as mentioned gender.

There was a time when women or men might be disowned for being in interracial marriages/relationships, and yet now we see that as socially acceptable and deplorable when others attack said union. There are those that would still attack it, and make it vocal. Now interracial relationships are very common. You were born your race, and you could not control it, and you can't control who you fall in love with and choose to marry.

The younger generation for the most part, who have access to social media, apps on their phone, and more importantly information beyond what they are taught by the older generation, will eventually make up their mind. Concepts like interracial dating, women's rights and gay rights will eventually be exposed to them, and acceptance of these topics will grow and eventually become acceptable. Eventually this will not be a topic. Our kids...kids will love their kids regardless of their orientation.

So would I love my gay kid? Yes! I would also probably also know if they were.

They are my flesh and blood, they have good role models, excellent education, and amazing people in their life. If they happen to be gay, then I know it was not a choice or a phase. I know that it is honestly who they are, and as long as they are happy, able to take care of themselves, and healthy, then I will support them to ensure that they are even more happier. Anything that you love so much right from the womb is just something I can't fathom not loving after it tells me who it might love in the future.

Peace!

D

jthm
06-13-2014, 05:48 AM
I think children have a hard time distinguishing a romantic relationship from a friendship, but the media and agenda is pushing them in a certain direction which forces them to identify. If it were my son, Id spend more time with him and help guide him in the right direction.

jtroster
06-13-2014, 07:09 AM
I have two gay children. My love for them has not changed from when they were born.

demike
06-13-2014, 12:41 PM
I don't have kids but I hope to one day when I find the right girl. I just want my kids to be born safe and healthy and for the mom (future soul mate I hope) to also be safe and healthy. I am an Uncle and I'd do anything in my power for my nieces so I can only imagine how I will feel about my own kids someday. I wouldn't care if they tell me they are gay as long as they are happy. I rather them be gay and happy than be unhappy.

Oceanside
06-13-2014, 04:11 PM
it's better to find out that your kid is gay when he's younger than when he's older, because when you find out he's gay when he's younger, there's still time to look on the internet and find him an exorcist or maybe even sign him up for pop warner football (or something)- Oceanside

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 06:43 PM
Wait... You come to the ov35 and ask a question. I'm assuming you understand that you are going to receive responses that will align with your thinking and some that differ. No where in his post did he "belittle" anyone.

Obviously this is a topic that you hold close because you are in fact gay. Understandable. I myself would not love my children any less for any choice they make in life or for their sexual identity. I think the consensus is that we would love them the same either way.

As far as the civil rights thing... How is it equality if somebody beats the **** out of me its assault, if somebody beats the **** out of you its a hate crime and hold a stiffer penalty? That's not equal rights, that is total inequality. You can have a gay pride parade and it is celebrated, If there was a straight Christian pride parade it would be labeled intolerant and hateful. I think what he was trying to say about the "pop culture" aspect is that IT IS being brought to the forefront and is being exploited by media and entertainment. Gay men in movies and TV "pop culture" are represented by a cookie cutter personification of a flamboyant diva. I own a high end modern furniture store and work closely with gay men quite often... They are not represented in media correctly by any stretch of the imagination.

I'll agree with your first point, I do hold a different perspective since I myself have had to suffer through this. But as to the bold, you are not pointing out causes pushed because people are gay, simply causes pushed by the liberal wing in American politics. I don't think you should face stiffer penalties because you attacked a gay man verses an old women. I don't think you should be able to sue your employer over their choosing to terminate you based on being gay, or anything else other than poor work ethic. And I don't think the "pop culture" you speak of represents gay people any more than it does heteros. Everyone has an agenda, and the left in this county has manipulated the gays the same way the right has the religious. Don't confuse a political movement with individuals they claim to represent.

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 06:53 PM
Been a while since I posted. (Work, Gym, eating...rinse repeat...little time) I have been lurking.

Sorry...I have to go into religion here because it's the only argument that I see as a common protest to homosexuality. I will keep it more based on fact, and this is not an attack.

I have been on FB and other media as part of my job recently and I see a polarization between people on this topic. Religion being a very common argument. However religion has changed and evolved in almost all but this specific topic. Even then the bible does a poor job of stating anything about it, and Jesus never mentioned it once.

My personal take is that they are your children. Your flesh and blood. if I felt a persons sexuality was a choice then obviously arguments could be made, but since I do believe it is genetic, and not environmental or learned behaviour, I would have to say that I would love my child regardless.

The religious argument I hear constantly seems to only apply with gay people, but lets not forget that Women were a target as well. There are a lot of very outspoken religious women out there, who if they were following their own religion would not be able to speak at all. In true and fair fact, in some religions today female infanticide is still practiced because religious sects prefer a son. While not likening female infanticide to someone loving their gay child, one needs to look at the aspect of abandonment. If I choose to ignore or disown my gay son or daughter, I am essentially killing that relationship based on how they were born. But there is a lot to be said about abandoning your child due to sexuality or as mentioned gender.

There was a time when women or men might be disowned for being in interracial marriages/relationships, and yet now we see that as socially acceptable and deplorable when others attack said union. There are those that would still attack it, and make it vocal. Now interracial relationships are very common. You were born your race, and you could not control it, and you can't control who you fall in love with and choose to marry.

The younger generation for the most part, who have access to social media, apps on their phone, and more importantly information beyond what they are taught by the older generation, will eventually make up their mind. Concepts like interracial dating, women's rights and gay rights will eventually be exposed to them, and acceptance of these topics will grow and eventually become acceptable. Eventually this will not be a topic. Our kids...kids will love their kids regardless of their orientation.

So would I love my gay kid? Yes! I would also probably also know if they were.

They are my flesh and blood, they have good role models, excellent education, and amazing people in their life. If they happen to be gay, then I know it was not a choice or a phase. I know that it is honestly who they are, and as long as they are happy, able to take care of themselves, and healthy, then I will support them to ensure that they are even more happier. Anything that you love so much right from the womb is just something I can't fathom not loving after it tells me who it might love in the future.

Peace!

D

reps for an excellent and well thought out post!

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 06:55 PM
An interesting case study in gender identity that's semi-relavent.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John/Joan_case

cliffs
John is an identical twin
John has a botched circumcism.
John has his junk surgically modified to be a girl.
john is renamed Joan and raised as a girl and not told the truth.
Joan realizes in "her" teens that something is terribly wrong. she doesn't feel like a girl. Thinks she should be a guy.

Conclusion: People are born who they are and although "nurture" plays a role "nature" prevails.

I always find it interesting, if not weird, how a discussion about the rights of people who are attracted to the same sex inevitably turns into a discussion about people who want to be the opposite sex, as if they had anything in common.

Oceanside
06-13-2014, 07:08 PM
I always find it interesting, if not weird, how a discussion about the rights of people who are attracted to the same sex inevitably turns into a discussion about people who want to be the opposite sex, as if they had anything in common.


I got an idea there "sunshine" !

why don't you take your freaking drama to a therapist where it belongs :)

so-tex
06-13-2014, 07:36 PM
I got an idea there "sunshine" !

why don't you take your freaking drama to a therapist where it belongs :)
Or sign up for a pop Warner football league. :)

Fishman15
06-13-2014, 07:47 PM
Or sign up for a pop Warner football league. :)

welcome back tex! I think OS needs to get in touch with his softer side...

so-tex
06-13-2014, 07:55 PM
welcome back tex! I think OS needs to get in touch with his softer side...
Thanks. OS doesn't have a soft side. :)

GuyJin
06-13-2014, 07:59 PM
Thanks. OS doesn't have a soft side. :)
---

Only when he's mooning the camera and sending noodz to CBB.

:eek:

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 08:08 PM
I got an idea there "sunshine" !

why don't you take your freaking drama to a therapist where it belongs :)

Why the hostility sir? Did I say something that upset you? If so, that was not my intention and I apologize.

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 08:10 PM
Or sign up for a pop Warner football league. :)

Sometimes sarcasm is called for, other times it is not.

latebloomingmom
06-13-2014, 08:11 PM
Sometimes sarcasm is called for, other times it is not.whose calling for sarcasm? didn't hear my phone ring ;)

so-tex
06-13-2014, 08:16 PM
---

Only when he's mooning the camera and sending noodz to CBB.

:eek:
Yeah, but he is giving CBB the finger so no soft side for OS.

Oceanside
06-13-2014, 08:53 PM
Why the hostility sir? Did I say something that upset you? If so, that was not my intention and I apologize.

no hostility at all..

I'll just say I'm not down with what you male homosexuals do behind close doors and I'll never not be ok with saying it like others here won't, I have a niece that hasn't come out yet (late 20's small town in Wisconson) and yes I love her because she's cool and it doesn't bother me, but I couldn't honestly say what I would do if anyone else in the family (male) was gay...

for the most part I don't have problems with gays....

my problem is with gays that want to announce they're gay...

because that's when I remember that what you do (as a male homosexual) is pretty disgusting...

but no...

no hostility

Fishman15
06-13-2014, 09:12 PM
my problem is with gays that want to announce they're gay...

So much this^^^

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 09:29 PM
whose calling for sarcasm? didn't hear my phone ring ;)

Girl! I don't know you, but you remind me of a best friend my mom use to have when we were all younger and in better days. Your posts brings laughs, joys, and a reminder of a better time, and you seem like someone I'd like to know in some better day.

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 09:32 PM
no hostility at all..

I'll just say I'm not down with what you male homosexuals do behind close doors and I'll never not be ok with saying it like others here won't, I have a niece that hasn't come out yet (late 20's small town in Wisconson) and yes I love her because she's cool and it doesn't bother me, but I couldn't honestly say what I would do if anyone else in the family (male) was gay...

for the most part I don't have problems with gays....

my problem is with gays that want to announce they're gay...

because that's when I remember that what you do (as a male homosexual) is pretty disgusting...

but no...

no hostility

No offense taken sir. You don't have to like what I do (or don't even do, if you even knew). I'd just respect your choice to respect mine to do (or not) it. A persons sexuality has so much more to do with who they are attracted to than most will ever know.

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 09:46 PM
I'm gonna get so-tex to translate this crap for me because I hear he's pretty good with phags.

are you serious?

mikieson
06-13-2014, 09:48 PM
Sometimes I have to double check to see if I'm in the over 35 forum when I read what people say. Seriously the OP was asking legit questions.. Try and make us older people look better by acting grown for once.

so-tex
06-13-2014, 09:50 PM
are you serious?
Probably.

Oceanside
06-13-2014, 10:27 PM
Sometimes I have to double check to see if I'm in the over 35 forum when I read what people say. Seriously the OP was asking legit questions.. Try and make us older people look better by acting grown for once.

yeah...

we all went through that kind of crap when you were posting about how fat your wife was and how you wanted to kill yourself.....


it's great to see the meds are workin :)

onmyway01
06-13-2014, 10:29 PM
Sometimes I have to double check to see if I'm in the over 35 forum when I read what people say. Seriously the OP was asking legit questions.. Try and make us older people look better by acting grown for once.

Thanks man, I thought my question was legit, but many here thought otherwise...

Oceanside
06-13-2014, 10:41 PM
Thanks man, I thought my question was legit, but many here thought otherwise...

your question was as generic as it gets, your motive is what some people (me) questioned....

not a professional, but if I didn't know better I'd almost say you're looking for validation for a lifestyle you're not willing to admit you live by asking the question....

I personally don't think you're ready to come out....


what's your full name and where do ya live ?

GuyJin
06-14-2014, 12:59 AM
Sometimes I have to double check to see if I'm in the over 35 forum when I read what people say. Seriously the OP was asking legit questions.. Try and make us older people look better by acting grown for once.
---

This, coming from a person who says they'd shoot dogs and laugh about it. Yeah, you sounded all grown up when you made that post, champ...

:(