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bodyhard
04-12-2014, 05:06 PM
Holy carp just f few minutes ago I had to control my temper and my reaction due to the love of my wife.

At Rite Aid with wifey picking up some toiletries, snacks for my grandchildren and some cleaning stuff. In the line right in front of us was a man and his (I have to assume daughter, who knows maybe it was his niece, cousin little siste etc etc, but thought leads me to believe daughter) and an old lady (again I have to assume cause I wasn't there in the beginning) got in front of them. The old lady had to be about 80 or so. When the man told the old lady that she skipped them, she said no one was there and the man turns to his daughter (and in Spanish) started cursing the sh!t out of her, calling her stupid, a moron, a f'cking idiot and some other words in Spanish for getting out of the line. The little girl had to be no more than 7 or 8. Then when the little girl didn't not respond to his verbal abuse, she just stood there looking at him confused, he whacks her upside her head like 3 times and really hard.

My wife grabbed my arm very tightly as in please don't get involved because she can not take excitement due to her clogged artery. She said for us to put back the stuff we had back on the shelves and for us to leave, which we did.

Talk about inches away of reacting.

The sad thing is no one said anything to this guy, I know why I did not and maybe others had their reasons just as I did, but man I left out of there with my heart pounding, knees and hands shaking, out of sheer anger.

OldCoach
04-12-2014, 05:12 PM
Yep: know how you feel BH, and you will probably relive this thing over and over in your mind. Good that the gentle nature of your wife soothed things over. I can see why the rage though, what a jerk.
Wait a minute you're a grandpop?????

paolo59
04-12-2014, 05:15 PM
There are certainly some sorry excuses for parents out there! :( If you wandered around long enough in any department store you'd see repeated opportunity to slap somebody right upside their head on every other aisle!

bodyhard
04-12-2014, 05:24 PM
Yep: know how you feel BH, and you will probably relive this thing over and over in your mind. Good that the gentle nature of your wife soothed things over. I can see why the rage though, what a jerk.
Wait a minute you're a grandpop?????

5 kids 4 boys 1 girl ages 32; 30; 29; 27 and 26. 4 grandchildren (2 on the way) 3 girls 1 boy. Ages 6, ,5, 4 and 11 months.

OldCoach
04-12-2014, 05:33 PM
WOW....godbless you.

Stalldad
04-12-2014, 07:01 PM
It's hard to not beat someone who is asking for it like that, but probably better off in the long run for not doing it. Although I am sure it would have a pleasure to knock the crap out of him.

bodyhard
04-12-2014, 07:24 PM
WOW....godbless you.

Thanks man


It's hard to not beat someone who is asking for it like that, but probably better off in the long run for not doing it. Although I am sure it would have a pleasure to knock the crap out of him.

Without a doubt.

Wyomann
04-12-2014, 07:26 PM
Maybe kicking the guys ass wouldn't be the right move, but not saying anything doesn't seem right either.

bodyhard
04-12-2014, 07:33 PM
Maybe kicking the guys ass wouldn't be the right move, but not saying anything doesn't seem right either.

If I would have said something, it would have led to a confrontation, my wife is sick now, no way was I going to jeopardize her health. Even an argument would have stressed her out and the doc has told her to keep the stress to a minimum if at all possible.

Wyomann
04-12-2014, 07:46 PM
If I would have said something, it would have led to a confrontation, my wife is sick now, no way was I going to jeopardize her health. Even an argument would have stressed her out and the doc has told her to keep the stress to a minimum if at all possible.

Ya you have to take care of your own first.

steffo99
04-12-2014, 09:30 PM
Glad I never had to come across people like this (outside of bars at least) because even though being very laid back I would have had
to say something. Just thinking of the poor kid. If he had gotten his ass kicked, he would have probably taken his frustrations
out on the little girl later.

mirroroferised
04-12-2014, 10:07 PM
.... Just thinking of the poor kid. If he had gotten his ass kicked, he would have probably taken his frustrations
out on the little girl later.

My first thought as well.


Had to have been hard but for your wife's sake and that little kid, you probably made the right decision.

There are some real ****ing degenerates out there.

Brackneyc
04-12-2014, 10:38 PM
Most guys would have said nothing.

ticklemeelbow
04-12-2014, 11:12 PM
Sometimes I want to kill people.

frozensparky
04-12-2014, 11:16 PM
Just thinking of the poor kid. If he had gotten his ass kicked, he would have probably taken his frustrations
out on the little girl later.

This is probably very true.


Most guys would have said nothing.

And so is this

paolo59
04-12-2014, 11:19 PM
Sometimes I want to kill people.

You're a dark soul! :( Does someone need to call a 1-800 number? LMAO Life is tough, I don't care how much money one has. :) Sometimes money makes a difference...most times it doesn't. Honest to God's truth! :) But you just can't 'kill folks!' :( I don't care how much you might want to! :)

Karl_Hungus
04-13-2014, 12:32 AM
Maybe kicking the guys ass wouldn't be the right move, but not saying anything doesn't seem right either.

Yeah, but honestly, there is nothing BH could have said or done that would have improved the situation for the child in the slightest. Short of removing the kid from the home, nothing is likely to change.

bodyhard
04-13-2014, 07:01 AM
Funny how you don't notice these things. If he would not have done what he did you would think he was normal (whatever normal is these days) the girl was clean kept spoke clearly with good mannerisms.

Frnkd
04-13-2014, 01:51 PM
Not sure if its a cultural thing, but the physical reactions some children have to endure is just perpetuated and passed along to their children. Unless of course they make a conscious effort not to. Here teaching the variety of Polynesian groups they cant openly hit and slap their kids is on going. Whereas the psychological taunting of some Asian parents- "your brother is better than you", "You got a B, why not an A, whats wrong with you".....etc can also be very difficult to break.

What is acceptable evolves over time. Hopefully this girl wont perpetuate this kind of behavior.

Likewise BH, physical violence isnt always the answer too. When people are so use to reacting a certain way i.e cussing, or fighting, change comes from making a conscious effort to not do what is almost instinctual. However, an accepted alternative behavior must be learned.

marinevet63031
04-13-2014, 02:02 PM
BH, I have PTSD and just reading that made me go through relaxation exercises. It just burdens me to hear of how unabashedly stupid some people can be. You pal are more of a hero to your wife for walking away. You are certainly a big man. By the way, I got PTSD for war in Somalia, Haiti, and Bosnia while serving in the Marines during the early part of the Clinton era.

bodyhard
04-13-2014, 04:18 PM
BH, I have PTSD and just reading that made me go through relaxation exercises. It just burdens me to hear of how unabashedly stupid some people can be. You pal are more of a hero to your wife for walking away. You are certainly a big man. By the way, I got PTSD for war in Somalia, Haiti, and Bosnia while serving in the Marines during the early part of the Clinton era.

I'll have to google PTSD :(

ridefattires
04-16-2014, 10:08 PM
BH,
I kicked the crap out of a guy in a dark parking lot one night. He used to beat the heck out of his girlfriend, she was my co worker. She was 5'1" about 105 lbs.
he was much larger.

She never complained to me or asked me to take action. But I saw him one night and lost it. He was the biggest beeoch I ever faught. Later that knight he tooled her up something special.

Felt kinda bad about that. I didn't do it for her though. The end result, nothing good. No preeminent correction to the problem. You did the right thing.

V-240
04-16-2014, 11:12 PM
Man, talk about a lose-lose situation. :(

superman713
04-16-2014, 11:20 PM
yeah, violence probably would have done nothing to correct the issue...




Then again a wig splitting knock out just might have done it.

bodyhard
04-17-2014, 06:53 AM
BH,
I kicked the crap out of a guy in a dark parking lot one night. He used to beat the heck out of his girlfriend, she was my co worker. She was 5'1" about 105 lbs.
he was much larger.

She never complained to me or asked me to take action. But I saw him one night and lost it. He was the biggest beeoch I ever faught. Later that knight he tooled her up something special.

Felt kinda bad about that. I didn't do it for her though. The end result, nothing good. No preeminent correction to the problem. You did the right thing. Sometimes they need an ass whipping just so they know how it feels


Man, talk about a lose-lose situation. :(

Exactly

yeah, violence probably would have done nothing to correct the issue...




Then again a wig splitting knock out just might have done it. Yeah but also hitting him in front of his little girl would be fck up

hmmmm16417
04-17-2014, 08:05 AM
Ooze frambah. Lol

Even though the guy justifiably deserved a beating, congrats on handling it the way you did. KarmA will get him and reward you

DocHoss
04-17-2014, 12:00 PM
Yeah but also hitting him in front of his little girl would be fck up
And could get you arrested too. As long as corporal punishment is legal, parents can spank their kids. Depending on how hard he hit her and how many people are willing to testify to that, he's more likely to get away with "disciplining" her than you are with assaulting him.

Life's a fck sometimes :(

JRT6
04-17-2014, 01:13 PM
I'm feeling you this BH; the older we get the less other people, threats, fear us. Gotta change and find another way to face that reality in order to feel secure in the presence of people who can physically impose their will.

theKurp
04-17-2014, 02:21 PM
The sad thing is no one said anything to this guy, I know why I did not and maybe others had their reasons just as I did, but man I left out of there with my heart pounding, knees and hands shaking, out of sheer anger.

You must be more like Kwai Chang Caine. He would have stopped the guy without so much as a 1 point rise in blood pressure. :)

bodyhard
04-17-2014, 04:40 PM
I'm feeling you this BH; the older we get the less other people, threats, fear us. Gotta change and find another way to face that reality in order to feel secure in the presence of people who can physically impose their will.

I am not sure I quite understand what you are saying.



You must be more like Kwai Chang Caine. He would have stopped the guy without so much as a 1 point rise in blood pressure. :)

LOL

JRT6
04-17-2014, 09:15 PM
I am not sure I quite understand what you are saying.


You like to be the alpha male in the room and I get it b/c so do l. For me its my security against the world but we're getting older and the punks are not. This creates anxiety and for some people fear.

You're not an old man yet but its time to add some tools to the tool box.

bodyhard
04-18-2014, 08:44 AM
You like to be the alpha male in the room and I get it b/c so do l. For me its my security against the world but we're getting older and the punks are not. This creates anxiety and for some people fear.

You're not an old man yet but its time to add some tools to the tool box.

I got ya.

The day I get my ass handed to me is the day I need to reevaluate my fighting abilities :D

JRT6
04-18-2014, 02:18 PM
I used to work security for the Cleveland Browns at their old stadium and at one game some old dude and his great grandson were sitting in the family section and a mid 20's some year old was sitting behind them drinking his smuggled booze and being a roaring (literally) ahole; he kept spilling beer on the kid the grand dad asked him to stop two or three times. The last time it happened the words got heated and the young dude threw a punch. This 70 year old then proceeded to work the guy over like a heavy bag and the drunk ended up losing several teeth. Turns out the old guy used to be a boxing coach and was seriously jacked. The punk got arrested and the last I saw him he was crying b/c the cops wouldn't let him pick up his teeth. The old guy did cut his hand up pretty bad though.

I don't want to start fights, but if I get into one when I'm that old I want to be that old guy.

geek23ka
04-18-2014, 02:27 PM
Something that does help is telling the victim that s/he doesn't deserve it and that someday they will be out from under that situation and their life will be better. If you get a chance. And even just letting the child see that you are shocked and disgusted by the adult's behavior can clue them in to the idea that they might not deserve the punishments that are doled out to them.

Every time something like that happens in public and no one says anything or does anything reinforces in the mind of the kid that they do deserve it. Like Wyomann, said, you have to take care of your own first, but if you can, let the kid know in some way that you don't approve of what is happening to them.

bodyhard
04-18-2014, 03:07 PM
I used to work security for the Cleveland Browns at their old stadium and at one game some old dude and his great grandson were sitting in the family section and a mid 20's some year old was sitting behind them drinking his smuggled booze and being a roaring (literally) ahole; he kept spilling beer on the kid the grand dad asked him to stop two or three times. The last time it happened the words got heated and the young dude threw a punch. This 70 year old then proceeded to work the guy over like a heavy bag and the drunk ended up losing several teeth. Turns out the old guy used to be a boxing coach and was seriously jacked. The punk got arrested and the last I saw him he was crying b/c the cops wouldn't let him pick up his teeth. The old guy did cut his hand up pretty bad though.

I don't want to start fights, but if I get into one when I'm that old I want to be that old guy.

Awesome chalk one up for the old folks!!


Something that does help is telling the victim that s/he doesn't deserve it and that someday they will be out from under that situation and their life will be better. If you get a chance. And even just letting the child see that you are shocked and disgusted by the adult's behavior can clue them in to the idea that they might not deserve the punishments that are doled out to them.

Every time something like that happens in public and no one says anything or does anything reinforces in the mind of the kid that they do deserve it. Like Wyomann, said, you have to take care of your own first, but if you can, let the kid know in some way that you don't approve of what is happening to them.

Good point and I agree, but depending on the person, any thing said can turn into an altercation, one which I welcome, just not this time, not with how Patty is.