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View Full Version : Hi, new member. sharing my story, asking for help. if it's ok to you.



mourntolose
10-01-2012, 04:30 AM
Hello friends,good day to you. I hope that some you have the time to hear me out tell my story and give me advice, I'll try my best to keep it as accurate as possible. (Later on if I feel more confident I'd post pics)

Sorry this post is a little long, it's taking 2 parts.

PART 1

Right now I think I am having problems. worsening problems regarding my everyday life.

Well. a little introduction, I'm Clark, 21 years old. right now I classify myself as sedentary, and struggling to lose weight.
Since I was a baby up until I was 2 years of age (at least, according to pictures of the past, I was having a thin body physique) Then when I was on my preschool years up to the present time of my adolescence now, I had been stuck in the chubby/obese/overweight class/range. During my teens there were times that I wasn't so chubby, but as far as I could recall those were for short times only and I would pass/give up on my diets. I tried a few fat burners then but only for a couple of times. Yeah I take sole responsibility, it's been my fault that I gave in to food, KNOWING the effects of overeating, yet still giving up for it. I took fried foods, sugary foods, though I still eat healthy foods, like fishes, though most of the time fastfood and fried. :(


Around when I was 16/17 years old, during this time I had been dieting so I wasn't that fat. I encountered some issues with myself and my parents which prompted me to just stay at home and I started to eat... and eat and eat. This was the time that I really ballooned, I became more than morbidly obese, since at 1 point I even exceeded/peaked at 400 pounds. (around 2011, 5'9 height, 20 years old) during those years I wouldn't care what time I'd sleep, I'd just play, and do whatever I'd want too...

Until somehow I've recovered late last year 2011. I've decided that I'd have to do something and start it by losing weight. Around November of 2011, although it was very hard, I tried to reduce my food intake slowly. I started by reducing my rice intake, though I still took sweets, ice creams, etc. Little by little I tried to improve my lifestyle, let the holidays passed without eating too much but I drank liquor too much during the holidays of 2011.
During 2012, around January I tried to go to the gym. Started off with simple exercises. Fortunately little by little the weight started trimming down, as well as my food intake.


(around March 2012)
I only went to the gym for a few weeks. I discontinued it, but I started to exercise by myself alone. I tried to wake up early (7am) then I would do random light exercises for at least 20 minutes twice a day. (walking, some jumping jacks, etc.) During these times, I began to know about complex carbohydrates vs white breads, simple sugars, frying is better to avoid, etc. Also in my point of view I improved further my eating habits since I have managed to avoid fastfood,fried and the like products as much as possible. Though during this time I was still eating meat, it was only white and not fried, and my weight little by little was fortunately, being reduced. I was around 250lbs this time, way much better than the more than 400lbs during my peak obesity during February of 2011.


(April 2012)
My diet and exercise continued, luckily I maintained it. but it was during this time that I discovered this supplement/ supposedly natural fat burner, called the Green Tea Fat Burner by Applied Nutrition.


I followed the dosage instructions, 4 tablets a day, 2 in the morning and 2 in the afternoon or evening.
Though I'd admit that there were around 5 times that I have "overdosed", because I took 3 tablets instead of 2 whenever I felt like the people around me forced me to eat much more than I should.
During this time - my sample meal for the day would be:

morning:
boiled egg and a cup of coffee

lunch:
usually the "lighter choice" that's available on the table, the boiled/steamed vegetable, or the white meat. I totally avoided fried foods, sweets, junks, softdrinks - I wasn't taking any of them anymore even if the people around me are asking me to. I tried my best to avoid them.

Dinner:
1 pc fruit, or of course the "lighter choice"


so approximately I was taking I think around 600 calories per day.
I started using 2 tummy belts wrapped around my waist, but I only wear them during when I sleep.

(May 2012)
This was the time I started to feel something weird. my routinary daily exercise of light walking, jogging, jumping jacks for at least 10 to 20 minutes daily continued during this time. I also experienced some ringing sound in my ears from time to time. I thought it was nothing. I felt something in my legs were starting to feel like jelly.Like something heavy, but I was ignoring it. I was continuing my intake of the fat burners.


(June 2012)
My condition worsened. Although I still lost weight, the condition in my legs got the better of me. I thought it would go away but it worsened, there was severe pain that was present within my legs everytime I would put weight on it. So there was a point that I had to walk struggling/limping and I could not fully step on the soles of my foot.. I wasn't able to exercise and walk freely, I had to be hospitalized. I still continued the fat burners though at this point. I had a fear this time that all my dieting efforts might become worthless since I believed that if I don't exercise I would get fatter. This time, I started to wear the tummy belt for the whole day. I didn't remove it all throughout the day, even through sleep.

I thought I had foot pain, plantar fascitis.. but the doctor who diagnosed me told it was something related with neuropathy. But it was never been cleared to me if it was caused by my diet, the fat burners I have been taking. He were considering that my nutrition/diet as of late may had played a part, but he is saying that it isn't entirely the cause. Tests were conducted upon me. here are some findings.
among them were:
Lumbar Puncture,
an MRI.
It was thought that I was manifesting GBS (Guillen-Bare Syndrome) though only "starting to" or "showing symptoms".
those IV-related tests, which showed that I have weak response in my legs, and in my arms it was starting creep upward into my arms.
it was discussed that I might have that "intravenous iv fluid transfusion" since I may have developing GBS. but that didn't happen.

I was in the hospital for more than a week. after these results I was discharged and fortunately, and nothing worse has happened except for the foot pain I was experiencing.. I was given medicine which I feared of taking because of the side effects I have read about them. I took these pillls:
Lyrica 75mg (2x a day)
Neurobion 5000 (2x a day)
Alanerv

I heard that Lyrica causes weight gain and depression issues so I was very afraid to take them, but I took them anyway. after a week I was discharged from the hospital. A month after I was adviced to improve my nutrit

I have mentioned to the doctor that I have been taking these (up to now I don't really know how to classify them) green tea fat burner, he read the contents of it and he said that it might be a cause or a contributor but it's unlikely to happen though he said I should try to stop taking it. This was around June 2012, but I didn't listen. I still continued taking the fat burners.

Although, during these times I reduced my intake. Instead of the recommended 4x a day (2 in the morning and in the afternoon or evening) I reduced the the green tea pills to 2x or only 3x a day. There were days that I took it only 1x a day, and to add to that during these times my food intake increased a little since I've been monitored and confined in a hospital for more than a week. It is also here that my fear started to increase, that I would go back to my 400lbs obese days and all those uncontrollable cravings will come back. I now am not looking at the mirror during these times.

After a week of hospitalization, I was still experiencing the severe foot pain though it seems to already have peaked. After being discharged I was instructed to continue drinking Lyrica, Neurobion and Alanerv.

I still continued dieting, avoiding fried,etc.This time becoming more and more conscious and cautious with what I eat. (always reading nutrition facts in food labels,afraid to eat foods containing more than 100 calories) but there were times that I would eat fried and white pasta, those foods that I fear whenever a lot of people are encouraging me.

(There's a 2nd Part)

mourntolose
10-01-2012, 04:31 AM
PART 2
PART 2

(July - August 2012)
Around July, a month after I had been hospitalized, the pain in my foot seems to have lessened, but to be honest I haven't felt 100% just like before. Something seemed to be still wrong, but I ignored it. I didn't want to be a burden to the family, I wanted to help. I felt somewhat weak but I was thankful that the pain was lessening and I could now somehow walk better and better as July and August passed. I called my doctor for an update and he told me to continue drinking Lyrica Neurobion and Alanerv, but I had decided to stop taking Lyrica, Neurobion and Alanerv already. (I stopped taking the three around mid-July, haven't called or seen the doctor ever since) (after stopping these for a week, I noticed I started to become moody. I became shouting a lot and there are lots of times that I have been staring idly at nothing and sadly that continues up until now)....

Forgot to say that during these times I used to feel colder than usual. Some people began to say that I might have anorexia but I ignored it. but would like to thank it since I discovered Karen Carpenter's music. Up until now (it's he 1st day of October 2012) I still maintain that I am just fearful with my weight and frankly, I'd prefer to die rather than to gain a single pound.

I also think it was at this point that I started to maintain a strict cereals breakfast since the doc said I needed vitamin b- most especially b12, that's why he gave the neurobion.
So each morning/or even if I wake up late, I always see to it that my first meal is either 1 serving of Original Cheerios (100 calories) or 1 packet of quaker oats original just add hot water (around 120-125 calories) paired with 120ml of unsweetened soymilk (which is around 50 calories). if no milk is around I'd go with sugar free coffee (I choose between 3 brands, 1 has around 10cal, the other at 20 and the other at 30calories).

So each morning I am estimating that I am taking approximately 180 calories since lately it has been always the soymilk I have been taking.
Right now, it takes me an average of 1 hour and 30 minutes to 2 hours to consume this serving of cereal and milk, as I time my bites - 4 minutes up to 12 minutes before I eat the next bite, I use a small spoon.
The same goes with the other meals I take. Even the boiled eggs, quail eggs,etc.
I still eat fruits though like grape, oranges, apples and bananas, though I fear them since of high carb contents. so I eat them, but those that come in smaller sizes as much as possible, in half, or in portions, as well as whole grain biscuit, or biscuit that contain whole grain (not those that contain sugar or sucrose)

(no malice,) also, but to share everything I have lost sexual arousal when I was taking the meds the doc gave me, but after stopping those 3 after a couple of weeks I could already resume back to masturbating although it didn't feel like before, it took longer, then now recently it worsened again, I haven't been aroused for weeks now. Also my bowel movements have been affected.It takes weeks between my bowel movements and that continues up until today.

But with the green tea fat burners, I continued taking it regularly as indicated in the bottle, 4x a day. (up until now, October 01,2012)


(September up to present -October 1, 2012)

During the start of this month my old grandfather noticed that my legs were sort of swelling, they were getting big. I told them it was nothing, though I knew it was something. I think I have edema, because I exactly match the symptoms, and I am experiencing it in my legs. I continued to ignore this until now. At this present time I could still walk, but you could really recognize that I am weak by the way I speak and the way I act and move. I am very slow when using the stairs.

As September this came things tend to become worse, there's this something in my mind that comes to me that is very hard to battle. During the course of my dieting starting late last year, I have to managed to battle these urges - those urges to eat, gorge, gormandize, gluttonize myself- These things that have caused me to reach 400 pounds and make a misery out of myself. But now these urges seem to get worse by the day - They always haunt me. "Eat this KFC bucket, it's waiting for you - these donuts - these stir fried noodles that contain 65g of carbs" - it's all coming back to me and it's intensifying like a tsunami. I am lucky that somehow I am still evading these thoughts and I am still able to stick to my present diet,

Mornings I depend on cereals as I've posted, then on boiled shrimps, eggs, natural foods as much as possible.
Included in my diet are vegetables, when available and only when boiled as much as possible.
Fruits also, like grape, orange, apple, banana, (I actually fear banana because of the high carbohydrate content so I lessen it, but I want to eat it, I fight the urge but I eat small bananas from time to time)
Also my part of what I eat are biscuits, but the biscuits I take are either wholemeal, wholegrain, those without sucrose.. Those "healthy biscuits"..

But then now, just last week or so (3rd week of September) I seem to be faltering and faltering, getting weaker and weaker.

Until today, I can't do random small jumps anymore. I would do jumping everytime I would wake up for the past month after the neuropathic pain I experienced was gone. This was my daily "exercise", since I could not walk for longer distances. I would do small jumps, then some small situps as for my exercise for at least 5 minutes when I wake up, this is my sort of warm up exercise. Then throughout the day I would attempt a couple of jumping jacks, which I can't.. but I still would just to "warm myself up because I really fear I would get fat if I wouldn't be able to do this "exercising".


So currently this is what I've been experiencing as of the present. Right now I am very dissapointed with my self. I haven't warmed up today, except for few situps I have done during the morning. I am afraid that this might lead to my weight gain, I am attacked with those gluttonious more frequently.


I hope you won't disregard my story, take your time please to read it and give me advice. Please don't disregard. Thanks a lot.

- I don't have any brothers or sisters. I have decided to keep secluded, though I still try to help our family in everyday tasks. I don't want to be a burden.

also, lastly forgot to add that I've been smoking. Should I stop? I am on my 4th cigarette stick today.
More importantly.Please give me advice regarding on the green tea fat supplements, I know I can't just go on buying them forever. Each bottle contains 200 liquid softgel capsules, and I believe I am on my 4th or 5th bottle already, and it's almost empty. I know this will have some harmful side effects on me, but I am uncertain on how to start reduce using them since I fear I would gain weight immediately if I reduce or stop my intake, given my increasingly sedentary lifestyle.


I just don't want to gain weight again... I'd rather die. That's all, but I don't want to be this weak... I want to change.

I have a brandnew weighing scale, I checked my weight last week and I was around 140. I'm around 5'9, 21 years old. again I'm willing to post pictures if you'd like. I am still wearing 2 tummy belts, and I only remove them whenever I would take a shower.

Thanks Bodybuilding forums. I hope I found the right place for help here. I just found this website randomly.

AlwaysTryin
10-01-2012, 04:32 AM
Tldr

Cliffs?

ShelbyAlmaria
10-01-2012, 05:02 AM
Please don't take offense in this, you have a severe eating disorder(from what you've been saying, I'd guess Anorexia Nervosa) and have been been greatly under eating for such a long time, you need to go and seek help from professionals. This isn't just a physical issue, your grave fear of gaining any weight that's causing you to under eat is a great mental illness.
You need to recognize that your body is slowly shutting down and is potentially severely malnourished at this point in time.
I can tell you now as a sedentary university student my maintenance is about 1950 calories, any less and I begin to lose weight, above and I gain. I'm a girl at 5'9 and 130 pounds. You can DEFINITELY afford to eat above and beyond this. You've been eating potentially about 1000 calories less than your BMR (amount of calories your body needs to maintain body function in a comatose state) and with exercise on-top increasing this deficit is only worsening the situation.
The low fat(or should I say non existant) fat intake in your diet is causing your low libido, adequate fat intake is vital for your body's hormone production. I wouldn't be surprised if you had low testosterone levels too.
Many people here have battled or continue to battle with eating disorders, please don't feel that you're alone, but you need to seek help.
Does your nutritionist and doctor know exactly what your diet consists of?

mourntolose
10-01-2012, 05:51 AM
Yes I know I have an eating disorder, it's all right. I'm not offended.
The doctor knew about the fat burners, but I haven't been communicating with him since then. I once consulted a nutritionist but I discontinued. I didn't like the diet plan the nutritionist had for me. Partly it was my fault because I didn't explain myself (on what diet I want) on the nutritionist.

How about my intake of pills? Has anyone encountered those Green Tea fat Burners from Applied Nutrition? (sorry I could not post link pics since I am a new member)

Yoy0
10-01-2012, 05:53 AM
I believe the reason as to why your fatiguing so greatly is because of an eating disorder. There's a right way to lose weight, and a wrong way, and you're going way way way into the wrong zone.

Put simply - you need to eat to perform exercise correctly, where else is your body supposed to use energy? Sure, fat is there, but it's not an immediate source, nor will it ever be one.

You need to seek help, you're not alone when you have an eating disorder, there are many like you. However, know this: I guarantee that if you continue to lose weight at this rate, you will gain it back again, eating at 400-800 calories a day is NOT permanent.

Yoy0
10-01-2012, 05:56 AM
There is no magic pill to make you lose weight, there are only pills that can help assist you to lose weight. I know these two phrases sound the same but they're not. I have never ever heard of these pills and quite frankly, you're better off drinking green tea than taking those pills.

You aren't ready for supplements yet. Just eat and exercise. If you can't run, that's fine, find something else to do - lift weights, swim, anything.

ALSO, I forgot to mention this, at your caloric intake right now, you are not just losing fat, but you're also losing muscle, which MAY MAY MAY (I'm not a doctor) explain the weakness in your legs.

ThousandEyes
10-01-2012, 05:59 AM
Yes I know I have an eating disorder, it's all right. I'm not offended.
The doctor knew about the fat burners, but I haven't been communicating with him since then. I once consulted a nutritionist but I discontinued. I didn't like the diet plan the nutritionist had for me. Partly it was my fault because I didn't explain myself (on what diet I want) on the nutritionist.

How about my intake of pills? Has anyone encountered those Green Tea fat Burners from Applied Nutrition? (sorry I could not post link pics since I am a new member)

Imo you need to see a psychiatrist and get help for your mental issues with weight and food. There's no reason to ever take fat burners they're extremely unhealthy to ANYONE especially someone already as underweight as you are. You need to grow mentally before you can grow physically.

ShelbyAlmaria
10-01-2012, 06:05 AM
Yes I know I have an eating disorder, it's all right. I'm not offended.
The doctor knew about the fat burners, but I haven't been communicating with him since then. I once consulted a nutritionist but I discontinued. I didn't like the diet plan the nutritionist had for me. Partly it was my fault because I didn't explain myself (on what diet I want) on the nutritionist.

How about my intake of pills? Has anyone encountered those Green Tea fat Burners from Applied Nutrition? (sorry I could not post link pics since I am a new member)

Does your doctor know how much you're eating? Any doctor in his right mind would get you to seek professional help.
What didn't you like about the diet plan your nutritionist gave you?
This in particular shows great signs of Orthorexia.
PLEASE see a professional.

mourntolose
10-01-2012, 06:40 AM
Thanks for the replies, i'm reading them. has anyone encountered the Green Tea fat burner's?
any suggestions on how to combat these severe gluttony urges?

ThousandEyes
10-01-2012, 07:03 AM
Thanks for the replies, i'm reading them. has anyone encountered the Green Tea fat burner's?
any suggestions on how to combat these severe gluttony urges?

STOP THINKING ABOUT FAT BURNERS you especially have no need for them. Please go see a psychiatrist. This is not a good site for you to be on in your current mental state.

ShelbyAlmaria
10-01-2012, 07:28 AM
stop thinking about fat burners you especially have no need for them. Please go see a psychiatrist. This is not a good site for you to be on in your current mental state.
this

ErikTheElectric
10-01-2012, 07:44 AM
I
Dont
know
whats going on
ITT.

Cliffs anyone?

Yoy0
10-01-2012, 08:16 AM
I
Dont
know
whats going on
ITT.

Cliffs anyone?

- Overweight man sick of obesity
- Developed hard-core eating disorder that is causing him to fatigue and develop all kinds of health issues
- Too dependent on green tea fat burners

Now. GIEF REPS!

brethans
10-01-2012, 08:21 AM
Bro, seek professional help

cbrent1
10-01-2012, 08:53 AM
Your main concern with this post seems to be with the "Fat burners" since you're disregarding what others have said about seeking help and at least upping your calories to near BMR so your body can FUNCTION.

On the topic of fat burners: I don't believe they have any magical properties besides the fact that in some cases they act as an appetite suppressant (mainly in the form of caffeine from my experiences). Based off the amount of food you are consuming in combination with the ammount of caffeine you're intaking from all the green tea pills I'm sure its causing at least some ill side effects.

mourntolose
10-04-2012, 07:13 PM
Good day people.

asking for your assistance again. Last two days were worse. The only thing I could thank for now is that the neuropathic pain seems to be gone but I am very very weak. I couldn't even stand up quickly now, it would take me minutes.

Please give me recommendations about the fat burner. Should I stop it immediately, or gradually? and please be honest, will I gain weight if I do? Or do I need to switch to hydroxycut or any other brand for maintenance? Please answer and be honest. Thanks...

ThousandEyes
10-04-2012, 07:41 PM
Good day people.

asking for your assistance again. Last two days were worse. The only thing I could thank for now is that the neuropathic pain seems to be gone but I am very very weak. I couldn't even stand up quickly now, it would take me minutes.

Please give me recommendations about the fat burner. Should I stop it immediately, or gradually? and please be honest, will I gain weight if I do? Or do I need to switch to hydroxycut or any other brand for maintenance? Please answer and be honest. Thanks...

STOP WITH FAT BURNERS I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH

Get to a doctor and psychiatrist now. **** the weight you need to get help NOW

Mallonhead
10-04-2012, 07:59 PM
Eat food man.
ED's are scary, go and see a psychologist, the fat burners are doing you way more bad then good.

mourntolose
10-04-2012, 10:39 PM
What are ED's?

Help please. I have been eating my usual 1 cup serving of cheerios and 120ml unsweetened soymilk as of now. I'm really worried since I haven't exerted effort/exercised as of today yet. It's really bugging in my mind that I'd be soon packing and gaining tons of unwanted weight.. I'm just reading books and surfing the net now in order to keep myself pacified. Can somebody help me with this?

Last night I can't really say I collapsed or passed out but something sort of that. I fell asleep/lost consciousness while surfing the internet between 10 or 11pm after taking 2 doses of the fat burner.. Woke up at around 4am already, feeling very weak and had urinated on the couch (before I used to urinate uncontrollably when I was asleep)

What I did, I woke up, tried to gather a little strength, washed with cold water and soap. slept around 5am. Woke up around 9am. Now it's 1:30 pm and I'm still consuming my cheerios while infront of my pc and doing some surfing.

Please don't abandon me. Try giving in suggestions. Tomorrow I have a commitment with my grandma, I have to accompany her to someplace important.

ShelbyAlmaria
10-04-2012, 11:10 PM
What are ED's?
Eating Disorders


Can somebody help me with this?
Go seek professional psychological help, this isn't just a physical problem you're dealing with.

None of what you're experiencing is considered healthy or normal. You need to go and seek help from your doctor and a psychologist.



Please don't abandon me. Try giving in suggestions. Tomorrow I have a commitment with my grandma, I have to accompany her to someplace important.
No one abandoned you, you're choosing not to listen to what we're saying.

mourntolose
10-05-2012, 01:18 AM
Thanks.
so what should I do now?
Is it safe to eat, say a 70g or 80g (according to a food scale) banana? or would that make me fat right away since I have took 20+ g of carbs from cheerios and soymilk awhile ago?
Got my last bite 2pm, took 2pills by 2:10pm. Toothbrushed by 3:30, now it's 4:10pm.

suggestions please. Thanks. Ther'es food here but I'm afraid I can't take them. there's noodles but theyre white and fried. I've been fighting the cravings.
There's also rice and bread but theyre white also should be avoided, right?

ThousandEyes
10-05-2012, 04:03 AM
Eat food. It doesn't matter if it's white fried or ****ing purple just eat it. Why are you avoiding food because of names? Nothing is unhealthy except for trans-fatty food.

STOP TAKING FAT BURNERS

mattmpz
10-05-2012, 10:59 AM
This troll has way too much time on his hands to write a fairy tale like this.

Verint
10-05-2012, 11:29 AM
Please, go to your doctor and tell him everything you just told us, and I mean everything. That is the best option for you right now. No one here can help you as much as going to your doctor and telling him EVERYTHING will. Please do it as soon as you can