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DanTheManB
06-21-2009, 07:29 AM
My g/f Nikki committed suicide on my birthday December 28th, 2008. Her parents and I found her. She hung herself.

I did two contests in '05 and hadn't had the motivation or desire to do another one.

Now every time I feel like I can't go crush it....or if I'm failing, I think of her....and I get another few reps. And my motivation has never been higher.

RIP Nikki. I love you baby.

-Lucifer
06-21-2009, 07:44 AM
Sorry to hear about your gf, man.

It's great to see you using her as your motivation. That's a good step for sure.

readyforthepain
06-21-2009, 11:00 AM
sorry man

johnderriLLL
06-21-2009, 06:09 PM
im sorry about your gf. ill pray for you.

JohnDoeNumba1
06-22-2009, 01:21 AM
sorry to hear that and I'm sorry for your loss.

Keep ya head up and stay focused man!

DanTheManB
06-22-2009, 07:47 AM
thanks guys. it's all good. i feel worse for her family...i'm less than 9 weeks out now btw

peteyyytran
06-22-2009, 08:44 AM
wow... sorry to hear about your gf, good to see you are keeping strong though and putting it into something that will benefit you. good work

LIguy
06-23-2009, 02:47 PM
I'm really sorry about your loss, but it's good that she is a major motivation factor. I'm sure she's proud of you for continuing leading a healthy lifestyle in her memory. your story is pretty much motivation for me to start something now and not just later.

DanTheManB
06-23-2009, 03:40 PM
I'm really sorry about your loss, but it's good that she is a major motivation factor. I'm sure she's proud of you for continuing leading a healthy lifestyle in her memory. your story is pretty much motivation for me to start something now and not just later.

good luck my friend :)

Mouzer
06-23-2009, 04:02 PM
Wow man you hit home with that one. Im amazed and inspired that you can go through a tragedy like that and pull out some sort of motivation. Truly sorry for your loss.
Goodluck with everything

pablocai
06-23-2009, 06:07 PM
RIP, good luck bro keep on going

darkartist81
06-23-2009, 10:15 PM
Damn man... That's horrible. I can't even begin to imagine how horrible that must have been, for you and for her family.

It's really admirable that you are using it for positive rather than a more negative route, it's hard to deal with something that rough and come out better for it.

DanTheManB
06-24-2009, 08:12 AM
It was the roughest first couple months right after I had ever experienced. I went out to L.A. for a few days to clear my head...didn't really help. I could barely eat for 3 weeks after. I still kept a lifting schedule up and cried between sets. Couldn't lift ANYTHING over 225.

Slowly got my strength back and in her name started crushing s hit again. Got my squat back up to 425 x 1 (best since my PR of 455 a year ago) And started doing it all in her name...

Did 2 shows in '05 and haven't had the desire to do another. She's my desire, my motivation my determination. My focus is back to being laser beam-like...because of her.

DanTheManB
07-02-2009, 05:56 AM
You either crawl under a rock and get crushed by it, or you get stronger and press that mother****er off you

ruds55
07-02-2009, 08:03 AM
It's always good to keep a little something burning inside.... Keep up the good work and thanks for the advice!!!

cosminoltean
07-02-2009, 09:52 AM
Sorry to hear man.. keep your head up!

boNie001
07-02-2009, 10:05 AM
far... thats shattering get well soon and tahts an amazing inspiration

DanTheManB
07-03-2009, 07:23 AM
It's always good to keep a little something burning inside.... Keep up the good work and thanks for the advice!!!

Thanks all you guys. Hope it helps you in anyway as well..


And it's not a little something. It's a bonfire. Everyone is different but I take the sadness, the disappointment, the failure, the anger, the losses....and I lock most of them away.....so that when I really need them...I will bring them out and just totally unleash..

She added to it. She's my #1. She probably always will be. This contest is dedicated to her memory and inspiration. Only about 7 out now...

DanTheManB
07-16-2009, 06:19 PM
The fire burns more intensely. Sitting here thinking of her...less than 5.5 weeks out now