BuffedStuff: Slowride In A World Of Instant Gratification

[BuffedStuff]

Okay I am going to transfer by journal over to this site it is all about my thoughts feelings and emotions as I began this fat loss, regain my health,
and become buffed journey.
Hello world, I am 45 years young and striving to see what I will become when I grow up.So this is all about me, okay part of me the part that wants to be a lean, mean, healthy loving machine. It is all about my journey from being fluffedstuff and peaking the scales at 179 quite a jump from my normal 110 pounds.To my steadfast determination to lose the weight, and resculpt my entire body from the inside out. I don't want to just lose the weight I want to recreate my entire self, body, spirit and mind. So I can be all that I was created to be strong, healthy, creative and connected eternally with my Creator. I have a feeling this is going to be a heck of a ride.

[BuffedStuff]

These are my feelings beginning in August of this year after eating clean, and busting my butt on workouts for 7 months..............
I was beginning to do my chest, shoulders, and biceps routine today when I just lost it and broke out in this silly grin. My heart was actually aching with joy. As I looked at myself in the mirror, I almost broke out in tears. Not because I was sad but because I was overjoyed.
I am actually becoming the person I want to be. I realize I have not finished yet but geesh. I have worked so very hard. On days I felt like quitting I just kept on going. when I couldn't see any progress I kept on going. When I had to say no to my desires that wanted to destroy me and keep me locked into my bad habits, I kept on going. I am earning this all the hard way, the painful, way but man does it feel good. I can honestly look back at the days when I would look at the rolls that covered my stomach and say heck whats the use, this will take forever. Something inside of me pushed me, challenge me to be better to give it my all. Now I am starting to reap what I have sown. So I missed a lot of useless televison for this body instead of watching someone elses pretend life I am watching my life unfold. I can't weight/wait for the next episode. Now I'm doing it for the joy of it

[BuffedStuff]

Please don't kill your dreams because you don't get instant results. Transforming the human body takes time and a lot of hard work. It is really hard to replace those bad habits that tend to rob us of our hopes. I mean we all get disappointed at times. Disappointed because you don't have the body of supermodel or movie star. Oh please people, did it ever occur to you that you were not meant to be a movie star or supermodel. Now don't get me wrong you were meant to be the best you possible. So what if you are just the healthy janitor, the energetic homemaker, the buffed receptionist, the well sculpted nurse, etc. The point is you are given the body that you were meant to have. Enjoy it, love it and take very good care of it. Be your best. So I figure the number one way to kill your dream is to lust, desire, crave what you can never have.
lesson for today Look in the mirror and start loving that beautiful face you see, desire to look your best..I challenge you to fuel the dream not kill it. As soon as I have time I will write about the second thing that I believe kills the dream.
8/10/2006

[BuffedStuff]

Plan, what plan? This will kill your dream faster than anything. I have discovered if I don't plan my day I lose focus I get bogged down in the unimportant. I end the day feeling rushed and I may have been busy but I was unproductive. When you have no plan, especially in weightloss, something will fill the void. I promise You it will usually be something that is counter productive. If you don't plan for a healthy meal or snack. You will still get hungry and then what? Will you run to your local fast food joint. just this once ( but you have done this just once 3 times this week) amazing how those calories can add up. How about exercise? Well, I don't have time I will do it tomorrow. Isn't it amazing how we can look at mind numbing tv shows for 2 hours. ( hey well at least they had a plan)but we can't find the time to invest in our own bodies, our own health. How is that for a slap of reality, ouch it hurts but we all know it is true, we kill our dreams not because we don't have good intentions, but because we refuse to plan and if we do plan we fail to implement the plan

[BuffedStuff]

I can tell you of two more fast ways to kill your dreams quick and easy. One, failure to be honest with yourself. It goes something like this. If only I had a personal trainer or that fancy piece of home gym equipment I would exercise and get in shape then. Come on is that really being honest. A personal trainer cannot do it for you, nor can any piece of gym equipment transform your body. You have to do the work. Hey if you are not willing to walk
and do the things that you can do. It is a fantasy to believe that you will transform instantly under the right conditions. ( there will never be right conditions something always happens) We must honest with ourselves if we are ever going to reach our dreams. The second one that is closely related too the first one is Believing in lies, fairytales, and every quick fix scheme under the sun. KILLER ABS PAINLESS QUICK, and EASY. It is not happening people, read these words let them absorb through your spirit engrave it in your mind and then tell everyone you come in contact with . It will never be Painless, It will never be quick and it will never be easy. Okay I admit these scam artist will quickly get you to part with hard earned money and that is about all. ANYTHING of value takes hardwork, determination and time.

[BuffedStuff]

Okay, You have this fantastic dream, This wonderful desire, You know you can do it, You believe this is what God designed you to do. There is only one problem that is hindering you and that is what I call the tick-tock dream killer. Time precious time. You know we place a lot of attention on money in our culture however I would argue with you that time is of much more value and much more important. See if I don't manage my time correctly, I can not reach my dreams because it takes time. When I was a kid I had an elderly neighbor who had this old clock that had a gigantic pendulum that swung back and forth and it made this irritating tick tock sound. I ask him why did it make that sound and he simply said that was the sound of me growing older and with each second that past I was becoming more like him and he was becoming more like those who had gone before him. Hey that scared this curious little 7 year old. I mean come on this guy was old he had wrinkles, and gray hair, and he could take his teeth out of his mouth. That was the first indication that time was valuable. If we don't use it correctly we will kill our dreams. I can't imagine anyone wanting to spend the rest of their life going from one diet plan to another lose 30 pounds gain 40 lose 20 pounds gain 30 but so many of us will spend our time on this planet doing just that 50, 60 80 years of yo-yo dieting.( that is a lot of time people)
Why? because we don't want too take the time to learn about our own bodies. Think about it we walk around in, it carry it everywhere, yet we don't care about how it operates, what it needs and does not need. I am convinced that we will raise an entire generation that will believe
that soda pops are necessary for survival and anything that remotely looks like water is to be an object of scorn. Well, I guess if we kill the body first we automatically kill the dream ( okay thats another rant of mine that I will deal with later) Back to my point....we want take time to learn how to eat, or take care of our body so we let others do it for us the result we leave their plan we gain back the weight. What is it that they know that we don't? They know we will not take the time and we will spend our hard earned money for the miracle cure or the prepackage dinners or whatever they tell us we
need. The reason I never tried one of the popular diet plan was simply. I look at people who said Oh I did great on this program but when I got off I gain the weight back
oh and I did wonderful on this program until... So dream killer number 4 is wasting that precious commodity called time focusing it in the wrong direction.

[BuffedStuff]

Warning, Warning One of the greatest ways to kill your dream is too hang around Poison tongued people. These people are filled with negative energy. They can give you a reason why nothing ever works, why it is no use. They are these bitter people that can wipe a smile off of your face in an instant. Never share your dreams with these people but since you can't always avoid them, use them for your advantage. When they say a negative you think a positive. If they say you can never do that, you think of course I can. Don't waste your precious energy trying to explain anything too these dream killers just make sure you stay focused on what matters too you and work towards your goals.

[BuffedStuff]

I think I could go on an on about things that will cause one to kill the dream. There are various reasons but really there is only one major dream killer. One factor above all factors that will hinder, delay and sometimes destroy the dream that is planted in side each and everyone of us and that is....The person in the Mirror. I have the final word, I may not have the money, the support, the things that I want but I am convinced I have everything I need to accomplish the mission. You see if I never give up on me, I can live my dreams or I can kill them. I am the deciding factor in my life. I can spend my life making excuses, finding reasons, throwing pity parties for myself. Or I can find a way to make my dream come true, enourage myself even if everyone else is against me. I refuse to leave this planet with my goals, hopes an desires still inside of me. I will noy kill my dream I will nourish it, and watch it grow into a reality.

[BuffedStuff]

I realize we live a politically correct world, where we have to have beautifully candy coated words so that we will not hurt anyone’s feelings. I mean nothing is our fault anymore. We are like mindless little robots programmed by the powers that be we want everyone to like us so we go to parties and eat foods that are robbing us of our health, so we can fit it. We go to workplace and we munch down on junk that destroys our health as it expands our hips and then we whine and complain that it is not our fault. As though they held us down and forced the food down our throats. So we have to wait for them to change until we can eat healthy. I have a feeling this could be a long wait. We can't exercise because we have no support; our sisters, mothers, fathers, lovers and others are just not there for us. So when they change we can become the way we were really meant to be. What happen to personal responsibility? I choose what I but in my mouth, I choose what I do with my body. Isn't that what makes us free?
I have made some terrible health choices that caused me a lot of hurt and pain, but It was my fault not the fault of the people who manufacture soda and candy bars. If that was my fault then I can become healthy and I can lose the weight in fact I can accomplish every dream that I have the talent and God given ability to do. All by taking personal responsibility. I refuse to live with excuses, there is never any reason that I can't become all I was meant to become and I know what is true for me is true for all of the people who inhabit this planet but telling them that wouldn't be politically correct.

[BuffedStuff]

On my weight loss journey I keep meeting the most awesome and amazing people. Some of them have made me laugh some of them have made me cry but they all have made me want to understand and Identify with them. So I started compiling a list of the things that I believe hold us captive. The first thing I notice is that most of us are suffering from, have suffered from are will suffer from bouts of low-self esteem. I admit I was blessed with awesome parents. Every time society, would stick a bumper sticker on me that said something negative my parents would replace it with something positive. Those messages from my parents still play through my head. "Come on you can do it!" "Finish what You start young lady" "Give it your best" "Don't you dare give up on you!" My parents programmed me so well that I continually play those tapes
even more so when I am at my weakest point they give me strength and help me achieve the mission. Well bravo for me but I soon learned that their were others who weren't so blessed. They got to hear all the unkind stuff while they were still developing words like " You're stupid" "You're dumb" " You will never amount to anything" "You're fat and ugly" words that hurt sting and
shape little souls and break little spirits. Low-self esteem chops at the very core of a human. Filling his or her head with lies, shame and guilt. It robs a person of seeing their God-given greatness; it robs a person of seeing their true beauty and worth. The key to healing from low-self esteem is to tell yourself the truth even when nobody else will. Replace all those old tapes that say you are not pretty enough, or smart enough or strong enough. The very fact that you are alive means you have something to offer, and something to share. Free yourself from the monster of low-self esteem, hang around people who build you up. Have a mantra that you say everyday let it get deep in the core of your being. Nope I don't care if even you don't believe it at first just keep saying it until you do. An example would be "I am worthy of love"
refuse to be remain prisoner to low self-esteem.

[BuffedStuff]

This issue is one I have to address daily. Okay it is a touchy subject. I haven't heard anyone use that word for it in years. In fact I have often use the word busy to cover up the fact that I was being lazy. Oh I didn't get that done because I was busy. Yep busy getting out of doing it. Laziness is sneaky because we can always cover it. Oh gosh, I didn't have time to do that because... I have so many things on my plate right now.... Okay I admit I am often busy however that does not mean I am productive. They are two different things. When it comes to weightloss, laziness will bind you and hold you captive like duct tape on a hairy chest. I mean try peeling that off without pain. That's the way laziness is once it sticks to you it is hard to peel off with hurtin'. (please don't ask me about hairy chests and duct tape these things just pop into my head honest) As I was saying when it comes to exercise and weightloss laziness will destroy the best of intentions. Look at the ( Okay I have to admit I am lazy in this area ) Eating and workout plan .....You don't know how many calories you are consuming, you have no set exercise plan, you have no mini goals. all you know is that you want to lose XXXX number of pounds fast. Ouch no wonder the results are haphazard. DuctTape Laziness so you can be free to lose the weight and reach your goals. Have a plan and then work it work it work it.

[BuffedStuff]

I don't know about you but this losing weight and getting in shape thing is plain hard. At the beginning of my weightloss journey I found it quite easy to lie to myself and others. Don't get me wrong I didn't plan to lie it just happen. I would say things like I'm eating all the right foods and I'm not losing a inch. Okay that was a half-truth, I was eating all the right foods, but only in double portions, hey if one banana is good two must be better. From there I graduated to the tall tale ( often of epic proportion) I'm eating all the right foods, I'm logging in what I eat, and I am exercising my heart out but yet the scale won't go down. Eating the right foods (more than enough) logging in what I eat, ( sure on monday and wednesday and maybe on friday...okay already it was a chore so I kinda skipped it most of the time) oh and the exercise I have to laugh on this one I burned more calories eating a apple. a quaint little stroll with a pal as we chit-chat could hardly constitue exercise. For goodness sake I was in full make-up and there was no sweat to be seen. I still smelled shower fresh after my uh exercise haha. Okay but there came the day when I had to tell the ultimate flat out lie. Oh brother when I whine it is not pretty. It sounded something like this. It's too hard, hey I'm too old, it is simply impossible. Now that was a flat out lie. How can I be to old, I'm still breathing. See I was wasting time wanting the very best while I was making only faint-hearted attempts. I had to stop lying to myself, start writing it down, start really pumping the iron, giving my cardio routines my all....Okay I admit when I walk out of the gym I am drenched in sweat, and yea at times I can even be a little sore, and oh gosh I take the time to plan what I am going to eat and then I work my plan. So I refuse to be held captives by lies, I can reach my goals and I will do the hard work. I refuse to sit back and wish. I will live my vision . What about you are there any lies that are holding you captive? If so the only way to fight a lie is by tell the truth and moving forward.

[twinnett]

You are very inspirational and you look tremendous! I won't add "for you age", b/c I would guess you at about 30 yrs old! You look amazing for ANY age!!

[BuffedStuff]

Originally Posted by twinnett

You are very inspirational and you look tremendous! I won't add "for you age", b/c I would guess you at about 30 yrs old! You look amazing for ANY age!!

Thank you Twinnett, you are simply too kind.

[BuffedStuff]

Most of us know what it feels like not to have your family, friends, or other important people on your side when it comes to something you want to achieve. Weightloss ranks way up there on the list. My hubby, sister, wife lover etc won't encourage me what do I do now? Encourage yourself. that's what I said You must encourage you. See I am seeing a sad trend. Sometimes we use the very same people as excuses not to achieve our own goal. I know I shouldn't say it but sometimes it true. Let us analyze it. Oh gosh I have too much fat on my belly (okay in my case it was all over, but you get the picture) I'm overweight I need to lose, a certain amount of poundage but my hubby, sister, family, won't support me so why bother. Come on I mean as much as people may love us it is our body. I was not going to end up with diabetes because my husband loved me just the way I was. I was not going to use the people I love the most as an excuse to remain at my worst. So if we really want it and we have no one to stand in our corner, we have to encourage our ownself. See we have only one for certain thing in this life and that is this. We will always have ourself. Yep From birth to death we are stuck with ourselves. Sadly we might lose family members and our spouse and significant other might just drift out of our lives but we will always have our body. I don't know about you but I don't want to be stuck with a sick, saggy body when I can have a healthy one. So if no one else ever encourages me. I promise you that I will be right there on my side yelling give it your best. I hope you will do the same.

[BuffedStuff]

When I was a child growing up. If you said a bad word or a curse word. Your mom might just wash your mouth out with soap. ( does anyone remember those days or am I the last of a dying breed?) I learned early on most of the words that got me in trouble revolved around four little letters.
So I learn to control my urge to say them even when little boys but bubble gum in my hair or tacks in my seat. (yea I know it was an entirely different era....don't make me feel like a dinosaur here.) Fast forward 30 plus years and
curse words are all in vogue. On television, on the radio everywhere, it has just become a accept part of American culture. HoweverI found there are two four letter words that we don't dare utter. Teacher in most schools will rarely say it. Most parents wouldn't dare upset or challenge there kids by saying these words. Mentors, and role models are even keeping it under wraps. Okay but since I pride myself in being my own dog. Yep I love folks but heck I'm tired of the lies we have to tell people the truth..............You can't buy your way out of everything
yes, I know we have liposuction, gastric bypass, plastic surgery, (and no I don't knock those things per se but still there are no easy fixes just ask the people who have been through gastric bypass, they can still gain the weight back and then some if they are not careful.) As I was saying there are no long term quick fixes so I am going to introduce you to my two favorite four letter words. ready here they are HARD WORK. yep losing weight, getting in shape, eating correctly is hard work. Yep you can have your best body possible if you will take action and but in lots and lots of hard work. or you could always try the ab belt just strap in on an in no time you will have fabulous abs. Okay I know Hard Work won't sell but it is still the truth.

[BuffedStuff]

Personally, I don't care what other adults eat really I don't but please stop feeling sorry for me. I know I should delight in eating foods that will make me overweight or obese and sluggish but I don't anymore. Like that old B.B King song the Thrill is Gone. I know I should take great delight in shoving krispy kremes donuts down my throat and complain as the old belly gets bigger and bigger. but get over it I am not killing myself anymore. No I don't want an insulin pump, I only want to pump iron.
I don't want to spend half of my life waiting in the fast food line and the other half waiting in the doctor office.
So stop it already don't feel sorry for me I don't want anything in my body that will harm it, hurt it, or destroy it. I know that sounds duh but you do your thing and allow me the pleasure of doing mine. I don't want body replacement parts brought on by my own foolish choices. So enjoy that extra serving of french fries, guzzle that bone destroying super gulp and you will never here me say poor thing. I will be okay really I'll just have to suffer through old age with good health but I will be alright. Oh and don't look so downcast because I don't use the holidays as a gorge fest aka food orgie to eat more than my body can contain. I am just here to socialize and enjoy family and friends not take the old liver and add unnecessary pounds too my frame. Get over it I am weird yep I have offically became a health nut. at least nuts are loaded with good fats the kind that do the body good. Oh gosh I really have lost it.

[BuffedStuff]

Feelings are necessary but did you every notice they can get you in trouble because they are not very reliable. Take my feeling for example. Oh gosh are they like immature litte children. When ever it comes to doing something productive, beneficial, and totally necessary they only have one refrain. "BUT I DON"T WANNA!" See it works like this time to get up and hit the gym "BUT I DON"T WANNA"
time to get your meal plans done "BUT I DON'T WANNA" Okay it is time to get all the important stuff done "BUT I DON'T WANNA" and on and on it goes. I feel like spanking my feelings little butt or at least banning them to the corner. I mean sure I know what I need to do but then their is this other side of me that could careless and if given free rein I would be doing entirely what I wanted to do. ( talk about trouble) See I understand, I can never reach my goals, live my dream or perfect my vision if I follow my feelings. For the most part they are out to get me. So I now spend most of my days ignoring them. yep that is the only way they lose strenght. I ignore them oh sure I still hear them shouting "BUT I DON"T Wanna" but I have learned a lot from them through the years and I shout back in an even louder inner voice "TOO BAD I"M IN CONTROL AND YOU GOTTA DO WHAT I SAY" I don't want be controlled by my fickled feelings that are hot one moment and cold the next. I will only be controlled by the need the desire to make my life count and to accomplish my goals whether I feel like it or not I will not rest until I accomplish the mission. never dream the possible thats too easy, now my feelings would never agree with that statement but hey I will just simply put them on ignore mode. Watch out world I am getting ready to surprise myself again.

[BuffedStuff]

Dropping the fat can be a long and hard journey. I mean some of us have more fat to lose than others but it is the same process. We become so consumed by how much external weight we are losing that we rarely pay attention to the interal weight we need too lose. No I'm not talking about the shrinking of internal organs. I am referring to the excess weight that covers our heart, soul and emotion. I want to tackle some of the internal weight we need to shed. The first would be Unforgiveness... Oh gosh can this monster become huge, in fact the older you get the bigger it can become if you are suffering from the burden of carrying around unforgiveness....well, it is time for a spiritual gastric bypass so to speak. Unforgiveness is a poison that contaminates your soul. warps your mind and leaves you bitter. Cut it out of your life. let go of it
starve it to death. See you can't live too long on this planet without hurting someone or being hurt and most of us have experienced both. Face it all of us have experience some form of injustice, rejection, mistreatment. When someone wrongs us we want to hold on too the pain an relive it as though getting bitter really helps us. Hey it was bad enough that it happened to us in the first place why do we insist on reliving it day after day year after year? Don't misunderstand me some of us really were severly emotionally and sometimes even physically abused or misused. How dare I ask someone to forgive a person who is evil at worst and meanspirited an cruel at best? Simple because what they did too you or me was bad enough we don't need to carry around the burden of what they have done to us. We need freedom from the weight. Learn to forgive. let it go and move on to a brighter future replace the sadness and hurt with joy and happiness. forgive someone today and see how much lighter you will feel even if the person you have to forgive is yourself.

[BuffedStuff]

Why did I get fat? how did I get fat? was I fat all my life? what made me want to lose the weight? How do I do it?
Hey I read all the e-mails ( gosh you people are noisy lol)
but I am going to answer all the questions just as honest and forthright as I can. This is going to sting me a little but here goes. I was never fat as a child, in fact I had a hard time gaining weight. In fact when I joined the army I didn't meet the weight requirements so they had me eat bananas and drink tons of water and keep jumping on the scale until I reached the magic 115 pounds. That was my highest adult weight when I would get pregnant. I would gain 20 to 25 pounds and right after the baby I would be back to 110-115 pounds. Now don't get me wrong I worked out hard when I was pregnant not because I was concerned about my weight but because I wanted to stay a lean mean fighting machine. Okay at least I was lean and I could hold on my own with a M16A1 rifle. Fast forward I started getting sick and I mean real sick I started losing weight at a fast rate. The more I ate the more I lost until finally I was 27 and only weighed 87 pounds. At 5'6 87 pounds I was slowly dying.

[BuffedStuff]

No, I didn't have an eating disorder.I thought I had some wasting away disease but it took hundreds of test before the Army doctors finally discovered what was wrong. My gallbladder was swollen filled with stones and it was blocking off the passage to my intestine. I was literally starving to death so my body was getting very little nutrients from the foods that I ate. They had too preform emergency surgery and everything went from bad to worst.
They botch the surgery and it changed the entire course of my life. The surgery was Primitive at best. I came out of surgery with a permanent scar on my right side. It looked like I had been in a gang fight and the gang had won. That was the least of my problems. I had sustained a lot of muscle and nerve damage. My right side from the lower chest down was paralyzed. It would take another ten years of hardwork, determination and prayers before I would be able to function at normal capacity again. My weight went to a 115 and remained there but I was still weak and frail.
I was beginning to think my hardest days were behind me but boy was I just beginning the roller coaster ride of a lifetime.

[BuffedStuff]

I refused to be a disabled vet although some might argue that the operating room was my battleground and all my wounds was administered by friendly fire. By age 40 I had almost full mobility and my life was pretty good and then
well the bottom just fell out. Everything fell apart. My mother had a stroke and she was left unable to walk or talk. My little motor-mouth would never utter another word on this planet and I knew it. She could only talk with those beautiful sad eyes of hers and my heartached because I didn't want to be an orphan. Then my mother in law was diagnosis with parkinsons disease and I watched as my husband bent under the pressure of knowing he was losing his mother too. Our oldest child was off in the military playing airman and then 9-11 struck and my youngest child took it very personal yep he did it. He enlisted. So this sets the backdrop to how I became overweight fast. As I watched those around me dying, dealing with their own pain,
and placing themselves in harms way. I turned to Junk food.

[BuffedStuff]

Junk food and fast food was my drug of choice. I ate and ate and ate. I was going for the long slow road to suicide.
I was doing pretty good too first my skin started to change I had that normal fast food skin look, from all those chemcials that were being pumped in my body, then I developed killer periods, in my case it was brought on my
poor nutrition, not enough b vitamins, not enough magnesium etc.. Oh gosh and then I start developing things I had never seen before. I actually had three rolls on my belly, I developed batwings and they hung with pride, if you looked close enough I was starting to develop a double chin. Oh gosh and I was tired all the time. my bones were becoming brittle and I was having one health problem after another. I was only 40 and I had become a tired old woman overnight or so it seemed. It took me almost 4 years of research before I began losing weight. I studied the human body, I talked to people who had yo-yo dieted.(to this day it scares me when I hear someone say I lost 60 pounds on this plan but I gained it all back, you need to try it) I studied chemicals. My chemistry teacher would be proud. and then after 4 years I was ready to slay the dragon my soldier instinct kicked in. I knew it I was still a soldier but now I had a different battle to fight. the war on flab and the war on regaining my life I was going to come back stronger and healthier than I had ever been. Life hurts sometimes but oh gosh how sweet it can be. Don't let the hurts make you bitter or a victim comeback, powerful, more determined than ever to live the life of your dreams. everyone has a warrior spirit. tap into it fight for what matters fight for yourself. The only reason I am spilling my guts and inviting you into my world is so hopefully you can make your world better. I really mean it when I say if I can do this anyone can. I have tasted hell and it ain't pretty. I came out with a stronger faith and a clearer perspective of life so out of bad can come good. now go and fight.

[BuffedStuff]

This journey that I am on has taught me many things but when it comes too weightloss and good nutrition I have learned some valuable lessons and its all about what I cannot do.

I can't simply stuff my face with whatever grabs my attention. I now eat to live period

I can't eat because I've had a bad day or because I am happy or sad or a million other emotions I could have...I eat now because my body needs the minerals, proteins, carbs, and fats thats the only reason.

I can't wolf down the food at a rapid rate, I eat slow on purpose and I finish before I get that puffed feeling.

I can't just let it happen I have to plan plan and plan
and then I have to work the plan.

I can't follow the crowd because the crowd usually does what is easy, what give short term satisfaction and what causes longterm pain.

I can't be mediorce if I want the best I have to learn from the best and do what they do no shortcuts .

I can't ever give up on me
Those are the things that I have learned that I simply can't do.

the eagle might soar alone yet he soars to great heights

[BuffedStuff]

I mean have you ever had to confront someone one You really did not want too deal with someone who sort of intimidated You. Someone You didn't feel you were really prepared to fight against, or stand your ground against?
Did you ever have something rise up from within You and say ah no You are not going to lie down and take that don't you dare let someone treat You like that. Oh my I face that battle daily with my most stubborn foe. Somedays I feel like saying enough already You win. You see everyday I have to face my biggest enemy, we sleep together, we eat together, heck we do everything together. In fact I can't get away from this person not now not ever. Yep my biggest Foe is the bad girl that lives in me.She will lead me in temptation in no time flat, shes unruly and undiscipline talk about wild and unmotivated. She is motivated only by feelings. She could care less about long term ramifications. So I have to stand firm everyday and keep her in her place. I can never be my best if I listen too her. I often meditate on this scripture.
All athletes practice strict self-control. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run straight to the goal with purpose in every step. I am not like a boxer who misses his punches.I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should.....1 Corinthians 9:24-27 (New Living Translation)
So as they say I lived to fight another day and I won, because I am the boss of me and I do have the final say so,
if I win I choose to win if I lose I choose to lose. Now that is power.

[BuffedStuff]

When, I looked in mirror this morning, I knew I was getting ready to give birth. As I walked into the gym and got ready for my routines, I knew it was only a matter of time before what I have been waiting for almost 9 months is about to arrive. Underneath the last vestige of fat await a new body, ready to be born. Erupting from my brainwaves are new ideas waiting to be tested. New thoughts ready to emerge. My Spirit is ready too soar. Never too be in bondage too the experts and naysayers.
I will never listen too someone tell me what I cannot achieve. I want be limited by age or social status or gender. If I am willing too work and work hard that is all that matters. Yep, I'm ready to give birth to myself, wow that is awesome. Get ready for the new arrival....
9/25/2006

[BuffedStuff]

The desire of the moment or the joys of tomorrow? When You live with ideas of the future in mind your entire world changes. Living only for today and not taking any responsibliities for our actions seems to be the rule rather than the exception. It doesn't matter if it will cause a lifetime of hurt and regret as long as the moment of fun is achieved. reward me, reward me don't make me feel uncomfortable. Don't challenge me to grow. If it hurts it must be bad.right?? How could I dare say no to myself. Hard work, determination, and endurance are all things of the pass. I want it and I want it now and If I can't have it now I will spend the rest of my life whining and blaming. Hey being a victim.....gets you points but it does not give you a victorious life. Yea I know reality is hard looking at the real person in the mirror can hurt. Truth hurts before it heals. Delayed gratification has wonderful results it gives you what you really want in the long run.

[BuffedStuff]

When I first started my journey my work out schedule looked like this

walk at least 20 minutes a day give it my best ( and I had to force myself to do it)

now my workout schedule looks like this ( and I wouldn't dream of not doing it)

Monday – Legs, calves, hams, glutes, quads and cardio
· Squats 4 sets of 12, 10, 8, and 6 reps
· Leg press 4 sets of 12, 10, 8, and 6 reps
· Leg extension machine 4 sets of 12, 10, 8 and 6 reps
· Side-lying straight-leg raises 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
· Inner leg raises 4 sets of 12, 10 and 6 reps
· Scissors 4 sets of 12, 10 and 6 reps
· Hamstring Curls 4 sets of 12, 10 and 6 reps
· Standing calf raises 4 sets of 12, 10 and 6 reps
· Cardio wind sprints 3 miles
· Bike ride 1 mile
Tuesday Cardio and Abs
Crunches 4 sets of 30 reps
Reverse Crunches 4 sets of 30 reps
Elbow to knee crunches 4 sets of 30 reps
Wind sprints 3 miles
Bike ride 1 mile
Wednesday Shoulders, , chest , biceps, cardio
· Front military press barbell 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
· Arnold press 4 sets of 12, 10 8and 6 reps
Side raise dumbbells 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Front raise dumbbells 4 sets of 12, 10, 8 and 6
Bench Press Barbell 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Incline Press Barbell 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Bicep Curls 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Concentration curl dumbbell 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Wind sprints 3 miles
Bike ride 1 mile
Thursday Cardio and abs
Crunches 4 sets of 30 reps
Reverse Crunches 4 sets of 30 reps
Elbow to knee crunches 4 sets of 30 reps
Wind sprints 3 miles
Bike ride 1 mile
Friday Back, lat, triceps
· Deadlift barbell 4 sets of 12, 10 and 6 reps
· Bent-over row barbell 4 sets of 12, 10 and 6 reps
Lat pull down front 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Shrug barbells4sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Narrow grip bench press barbell 4 sets of 12, 10,8 and 6 reps
Wind sprints 3 miles and bike ride one mile
Saturday Cardio and abs follow same routine as Tuesday and Thursday

I use too eat like this three meals a day, try to drink the water take one day a week and eat everything I want.

Now I eat like this 40/40/20 exactly what I need since my body has a hardtime digesting fats
(everything is math and chemistry) for me that would be 156 g of protein156 g of carbs and 35 grams of fat so my daily caloric intake is about 1560 calories it will stay that way until I lose the last remainder of fat then I am going to concentrate on building pure hard muscle. What I eat now is designed to help me , lose fat while building muscle oxymoron I know

before I would have complained about having to log in everything

now I can't wait because I want to become my best and I know to become your best you got to
give your best.


Man how I have changed from wishing too being can you guess which one I like more. I promise myself I will never again waste my energy dreaming about anything. I will instead use
all that energy to making it happen. The only things I will not achieve are those things that God has not destined for me. Everything else is up for grabs and I am determined to live a very fulfilled life. The best thing that ever happened to me was becoming overweight. It was just what I needed to prove I am an overcomer and I can do all thing through Christ who strengths me, heck I want to do more than quote scripture , I want to live it.

[BuffedStuff]

I've noticed a disturbing fact about most of us humans. We tend to live life either in the past. stuck like an old broken record ( does anyone even remember vinyl) or in lala land (this perfect little place in the future) and we miss the most important time---- right now. Don't get me wrong I believe in planning for the future and I have some really awesome memories of the past but it is all about today. Not what the scale will read at the end of the week or all that extra time you will have when the kids get grown or how wonderful you will feel when you reach your goal weight etc. Today, here, right now, you know the daily process.
You see today I was a success when it came to my training schedule. I hit the gym gave it my best..I am happy knowing I did my best living in the moment.Totally focused on what is happening right now. No, you are not there yet so you might as well enjoy the journey.

[BuffedStuff]

Outward beauty is shallow. Yep I said it. I know it is the standard that we like to value people by, sad but true. It amazes me how we can spend year after year working on our outsides and nothing on our insides. Okay I am old fashioned but what makes a person beautiful to me is their kindness, loyalty,
honesty, warmth, caring heart, compassion and understanding. My dress size really isn't that important but the condition of my heart is. Granted it is hard to lose weight but gosh it is even harder to become a person of quality.

Am I happy about the weight I have lost and the goals I have achieved with my body. sure I really do want my body to be at its very best. I plan on developing each muscle in my body to its maximum
capacity and become totally buffed by my 50th
birthday. Even though I expect 2 amazing but well welcomed detours before then. So yes taking care of this body is very important to me but that was only part of my goal.

It is more important for me too develop my inner woman. The greatest compliment I have gotten is from the person, who knows me the best. My hubby
said You are kinder and nicer. wow that is what I am aiming for. I never want to walk past a hurting person and not acknowledge there pain. I never want to see a person in need and just turn away. I want to grow and really love the unlovely. I don't ever want to hold a grudge against anyone and I really do want to expect the best from people.

To love unconditional is a hard one. To have mercy and to say the right thing at the right time is hard. So I hope as I get my body in shape my soul grows and my spirt soars to new heights.

Buffedstuff will one day be a Buffedstiff. My body will not last, but the words I say, the love I share will have an impact on future generations. I hope that when I leave this planet, my kids, grandkid and friends can say

She loved people with a passion
She gave with everthing in her heart
She was true to her God even in darkness
She was flawed and imperfect; perfect clay for an awesome Potter.
She accomplished the mission for which born
She kept it real, because she knew it was an inside job.

Heck if I can live up to all of that Then I truly will be Buffedstuff.