These are similar in nature to the infamous Chuck Norris Facts
1. Hulk Hogan was originally supposed to die for our sins. God had to go to plan B, when he discovered no nails could pierce his flesh in order to crucify him. Also, Hulk Hogan cannot die.
2. The universe was not formed by the big bang. It was formed from the sheer force of Hulk Hogan bodyslamming Andre the Giant at Wrestlemania 3.
3. Hulk Hogan's leathery skin is actually stronger than any other known substance in the world. Were this not the case, it is speculated that his muscles would explode from his body at an exponential rate.... overtaking all that we hold dear.
4. Hulk Hogan can count backwards from infinity.
5. Hulk Hogan isn't actually going bald... his hair is retreating from his deadly stare.
6. Hulk Hogan completed medical school in less than a week, however he has moved on to wrestling until mankind invents a scalpel that he can't destroy with his mere touch. That day will never come.
7. Hulk Hogan has caused lightning to strike from his mouth, just by bristling his moustache hairs.
8. When milk is poured on them, Hulk Hogan's Rice Krispies don't dare talk back.
9. Hulk Hogan fashioned his world heavyweight championship belt using nothing but his bare hands and a lump of coal no bigger than the period at the end of this sentence.
10. Hulk Hogan won the first sled race in Alaska, but was later disqualified for not using dogs. The judges who disqualified him were later discovered dead from leg-drop related injuries.
11. Hulk Hogan can grill a 112 oz. steak to medium well, simply by staring it down.
12. Scientists have recently discovered that the dinosaurs went extinct from not taking their vitamins, and saying their prayers.
13. On the set of Rocky 3, Hulk Hogan required extensive coaching to learn to properly box. Not because he couldn't fight, but because he was accustomed to using steel wool, daggers, and grenades on his fists instead of padded gloves.
14. Hulk Hogan winds up his punches the wrong way before throwing them. This is not a mistake, rather a measure he has put in place to merely cripple his opponents for life, rather than send them hurtling through the sun.
15. One man had the audacity to call Hulk Hogan's moustache "gay". That person is now the only soul in heaven confined to a wheelchair.
16. In high school, Hulk Hogan never had difficulty with calculus. He would simply write the equation on the blackboard, and flex in front of it. The equation would solve itself out of fear.
17. Hulk Hogan once punched out a Locomotive.
18. Hulk Hogan no-sold a punch from Superman.
19. The Hulk Hogan inspired character "Bass Armstrong" from the video game series Dead or Alive is such a badass, he not only kicked the crap out of everyone in that game, but magically jumped to other video games like Street Fighter, King of Figters, and Tekken just to whoop up on them too.
20. The Rocky Mountains were formed when Hulk Hogan leg-dropped an ant hill.
21. Hulk Hogan once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Hulk Hogan re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
22. Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Hulk Hogan.
23. Hulk Hogan once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Hulk Hogan won by 5.
24. A Hulk Hogan-delivered Leg Drop is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
25. Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Hulk Hogan Leg drop.
04-06-2006, 06:31 PM #1
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Hulk Hogan facts...Chuck Norris style.
04-06-2006, 06:50 PM #2
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