Soft and Plushy is Soft and Plushy

[SoftandPlushy]

Since I was younger, it's been a joke in my family that I had very built muscles. You play with these barbie dolls, all slender and dainty, and you are like, thats me right? When I get older I'll be that woman!

Hmmm, not quite.

I was a very nice 147 pounds of pure muscle come adult hood. Sometimes they joked that I was like a football player. I figure it's genes, my brother is Rae Carruth....which he was a very talented player in the nfl (that is before he went to jail.....that's a whole other story).

My calves are popeye solid, my thighs were always rock hard. People would say, you should bodybuild, which I considered, until I had two babies. Now I'm 196 pounds. Sort of the fat girl people think is pretty in the face.

But I didn't want to go to some pink fluffy website and talk about binging and purging or drinking broth and eating lean cuisines. Secretly, I feel like there's an athlete inside of me. I love to compete, I love the solid parts of my body and that I can move furniture without asking for help. I love to run, but can hardly find someone to watch the kids while I can. Yes, it's a big fat excuse, but I think me typing it is me acknowledging how excuses are my problem.

Six months ago I got down to 163 by exercise and diet, but when I moved to LA, I succumbed to loneliness and the fact that I don't have a fridge. So I basically ruined all the work I've done.

I don't take pictures of my whole body on purpose. But for the hopes of progress I'll take one today and post it tomorrow.

I'm 5'5 196-197 pounds and I'm currently for the last two days low carbing and trying to get into Ketosis.

I eat alot of steak, dark leafy greens and spicy tuna and spicy salmon bowls, with spring mix, no rice. But I've only been doing that for three days, so there's nothing to speak of right now. I ate a pack of potato chips last night, that makes me a loser, but other than that, I am pretty focused.

Any suggestions or help you have in me becoming a lean athlete don't hesitate to let me know.

Love you hugs and happiness SoftnPlushy

[SoftandPlushy]

Things are leveling out. Today is valentine's day and I brought a big key lime pie to the dessert potluck. I cut it in small slices, and rinsed the cream off the knife instead of licking it. It's also bagel day, and I skipped that too, even though they had the onion and pizza bagels. I'm not a bagel fan anyway.

I ate a omelette today that had sausage and bacon. It wasn't done all the way through so I threw it out.

I hate diets. I wish I just had the time to work out instead. I am going to go to a cardio class in NoHo Monday morning. I don't want to be fleshy, that's the worst. I really just want to be super solid.

I wonder if I will get through ignoring the potluck. Just my luck, as I slowly slip into ketosis we have a Sugar Fest 2008 at work!

[SoftandPlushy]

There's these coffees that are called Flavia, and lately I've been grabbing one or two a day (I know, no caffeine but I have such a hard time not falling asleep.)

So they have these great flavors, and I always use two or so packs of Splenda and half and half, but lately I've been thinking for something to be so tasty, it has to have some sugar in those little Flavia packets.

So I was in the break room examining the machine, the packet holder, everything. I couldn't find any documentation. I'm like ugh. Forget it.

So now I'm drinking vanilla chai tea, which has no sugar according to the label.

It's......an experience. *sigh*

I am still 196.0 according to my scale, so much better than the 198.6 I was last week. Well, not so much better. But there's hope.

I had a steak for dinner last night, that's it. I think I'm going to do a salmon steak tonight. I want to really protein it up in the evenings, to curb my cravings to stuff my face in the middle of the night with the most horrible carbs, which I am SURE fattened me up. Cause after work, I'd eat all night. I seriously was having 4 or 5 meals a day. That's why I blame myself for all this gaining.

I hate cardio but love weight lifting. But to fight the flab, I have to move. Monday is a holiday, so maybe I will just go work out tomorrow and stop being lazy.

Oh wait, I don't have any money lol.

smh *sigh*

[SoftandPlushy]

So I get on the scale and I'm up to 198. After all that damn salad. And meat. And skipping those evening meals. I'm like, pissed. I look terrible in the mirror. What could go worse?

Then I realize. Oh yeah huh. That time of the month. This is water weight.

Okay. I don't feel like a total loser.

Back to low carbing. I had a sausage and bacon scramble today, and a lo carb Monster energy drink.

As for working out, it will be in my living room tonight. Not in the mood to be all crampied up in front of other people at a class.

[Just_Me_P]

One thing you have to remember and I know from personal experience is you really have to read those labels on a Keto diet! Cause a little bit of suger can knock you right out as soon as you go in! Cause your body craves carbs for fuel so you're teaching your body a new (and more efficent) way to burn fuel which is from your fat stores and not carbs. Also are you drinking a lot of water? I didn't see any water consumption in your post so I'd sugggest drinking at least 8-10 glasses a day to start. Remember if you don't have time to go to the gym you can turn your house into your gym by doing calistenics; Push-ups, sit-ups, lunges, warrior lunges, squats, heel toches, table dips, curls with a milk carton, ect. As far as cardio I hate cardio too so I'm with you on that and I know having kids is rough but if you can't get the cardio in take your kids with you for a walk for 30 minutes you'll be surprised. One more tip: When you eat make sure you eat till your satisified not full cause whenever you're full that means your body is going to store the rest as fat so be careful with that and watch you're carbs and suger. Wish ya luck!

[SoftandPlushy]

Okay so I'm at about 194-195 ish. Life doesn't totally suck. I've been doing some martial arts...and it feels pretty good. I have alot of aggression to get out, it's funny!