insecure women and men who don't give compliments

[Esmereldah]

Like the title says. I'm very insecure, but my boyfriend HATES giving compliments. He'll text me "goodmorning q t"(yes just the letters q and t) if he's feeling extra romantic once a month or so, or if I complain enough. Any guys have any idea why a man would be like this even though he knows this would make his gf extremely happy if he complimented her at least every few days?

Extra-***he says that he loves me when I ask, and he wants to stay together. What's his deal? I'm I really just not pretty enough for him to do all the typically bf stuff?

[kittypawz]

No guy wants a low self esteem gf.

Seriously, on a scale of 1-10, how ugly are you??
....I kinda feel bad for your BF if you have to beg him to say you're cute...what if he really thinks you're not?

[YuMadThough]

When's the last time you complimented him?

[TheVeganMonster]

When he compliments you let him know that you like when he compliments you and you appreciate it... Reinforce good behavior <33

[Tiffany Wantsmore]

My ex was the same. He said it was because when he was young he WK'd his first serious gf and she started to believe it and then started to think she was too good for him and dumped him.

[Esmereldah]

No guy wants a low self esteem gf.

Seriously, on a scale of 1-10, how ugly are you??
....I kinda feel bad for your BF if you have to beg him to say you're cute...what if he really thinks you're not?

I cant really judge myself. Idk. But guys try to hit on me often. Especially at work. Its just my bf doesn't think I'm all that great so it seems

[Esmereldah]

When's the last time you complimented him?

I compliment him ALL the time. I even stare at him because he's just that handsome to me

[Esmereldah]

[Q
UOTE=TheVeganMonster;905571013]When he compliments you let him know that you like when he compliments you and you appreciate it... Reinforce good behavior <33[/QUOTE]

I do. On at least a bi-weekly basis. He just doesn't get it

[TheVeganMonster]

[Q
UOTE=TheVeganMonster;905571013]When he compliments you let him know that you like when he compliments you and you appreciate it... Reinforce good behavior <33

I do. On at least a bi-weekly basis. He just doesn't get it[/QUOTE]

You can't force him to compliment you......
did he use to compliment and then stopped or was he always likeee that?

[Esmereldah]

My ex was the same. He said it was because when he was young he WK'd his first serious gf and she started to believe it and then started to think she was too good for him and dumped him.

But he's not like that. He's very secure and hates three I'm insecure. He would be happy if I was super confident. He just doesn't do anything to help it

[jamestown0101]

Like the title says. I'm very insecure, but my boyfriend HATES giving compliments. He'll text me "goodmorning q t"(yes just the letters q and t) if he's feeling extra romantic once a month or so, or if I complain enough. Any guys have any idea why a man would be like this even though he knows this would make his gf extremely happy if he complimented her at least every few days?

Extra-***he says that he loves me when I ask, and he wants to stay together. What's his deal? I'm I really just not pretty enough for him to do all the typically bf stuff?

I compliment when least expected. Its not a free ride and its a rarity only used when well deserved. For instance, the gf's ass looks good in a pair of jeans and has been working out + eating healthy. Not based upon insecurity and to mask it. Compliments when genuine are with purpose and meaning. Flattery is disgusting and a waste of breathe. For these reasons, I have zero tolerance or patience for insecure women. I should not have to pick up and carry your dead weight. Ask yourself, if this was such a problem, why are you still with him? Why are none of the men that suck up with fake compliments not getting any of that pink means pussy?

[FuzzeWuzze]

But he's not like that. He's very secure and hates three I'm insecure. He would be happy if I was super confident. He just doesn't do anything to help it

Why is it his job to make you feel better on a daily basis?

Ill even give you the answer: Its not.

[Esmereldah]

I compliment when least expected. Its not a free ride and its a rarity only used when well deserved. For instance, the gf's ass looks good in a pair of jeans and has been working out + eating healthy. Not based upon insecurity and to mask it. Compliments when genuine are with purpose and meaning. Flattery is disgusting and a waste of breathe. For these reasons, I have zero tolerance or patience for insecure women. I should not have to pick up and carry your dead weight. Ask yourself, if this was such a problem, why are you still with him? Why are none of the men that suck up with fake compliments not getting any of that pink means pussy?

My bf doesn't even do that. It's like he doesn't notice me at all. He might say a shirt I'm wearing is nice every once in a while, but no compliments about my looks/character unless I pry them out of him and even then I may not get them.

[jwittwer5]

I cant really judge myself. Idk. But guys try to hit on me often. Especially at work. Its just my bf doesn't think I'm all that great so it seems

Pics


We'll let u know

[Esmereldah]

Why is it his job to make you feel better on a daily basis?

Ill even give you the answer: Its not.

Its not, but the fact that my own bf doesn't give me compliments makes me feel bad on a daily basis. I was less insecure when I was single .

[jamestown0101]

My bf doesn't even do that. It's like he doesn't notice me at all. He might say a shirt I'm wearing is nice every once in a while, but no compliments about my looks/character unless I pry them out of him and even then I may not get them.

Well maybe your not looking nice. Your 5'8 148lbs. Maybe if you log off and lift + do lots of cardio + eat healthy, he would notice and pay the compliments.

Pics


We'll let u know

bump!

[nzgs]

Why is it his job to make you feel better on a daily basis?

Ill even give you the answer: Its not.

ding ding ding

Would you rather your bf started doling out insincere compliments all the time? You should make the effort to fix whatever core problems are causing your insecurity so that his compliments are honest. If you told your bf what you have shared with us he would probably be more supportive too.

[jamestown0101]

ding ding ding

Would you rather your bf started doling out insincere compliments all the time? You should make the effort to fix whatever core problems are causing your insecurity so that his compliments are honest. If you told your bf what you have shared with us he would probably be more supportive too.

Agreed. OP, your not doing it right. As its been stated here, clear up your insecurities, start working out, lose weight, eat health, take up some new hobbies, and if you have got no friends, get some. If your not educated, get an education, get a career, and do not sponge off your bf like most women. Make changes in your life and he will notice. The flip side of compliments miss is being told when you are fat, looking awful, should change, and stop eating like a slob. Its a double edged sword so, if you want the compliments, prepare for being called out when you look nasty too.

[Esmereldah]

Agreed. OP, your not doing it right. As its been stated here, clear up your insecurities, start working out, lose weight, eat health, take up some new hobbies, and if you have got no friends, get some. If your not educated, get an education, get a career, and do not sponge off your bf like most women. Make changes in your life and he will notice. The flip side of compliments miss is being told when you are fat, looking awful, should change, and stop eating like a slob. Its a double edged sword so, if you want the compliments, prepare for being called out when you look nasty too.

He does give me citicism. He has no problem with that. And I'm not fat. Not as skinny as I'd like but I'm not fat. I just posted a pic on my profile of me at 155.

[kittypawz]

Post pics or stfu.
You keep saying the same sht over and over, it's getting annoying. Do you ramble like this to him? No wonder he has you on RL /ignore.

[jamestown0101]

He does give me citicism. He has no problem with that. And I'm not fat. Not as skinny as I'd like but I'm not fat. I just posted a pic on my profile of me at 155.

Your still with him right so he must be doing something right.

[Cinabun]

Stop fishing for compliments from him, if it bothers you that much and is a dealbreaker then move on. There's no way to coerce compliments out of someone and have them still be genuine.

[ShortDave]

Like the title says. I'm very insecure, but my boyfriend HATES giving compliments. He'll text me "goodmorning q t"(yes just the letters q and t) if he's feeling extra romantic once a month or so, or if I complain enough. Any guys have any idea why a man would be like this even though he knows this would make his gf extremely happy if he complimented her at least every few days?

Extra-***he says that he loves me when I ask, and he wants to stay together. What's his deal? I'm I really just not pretty enough for him to do all the typically bf stuff?

Through experience many men have learned that complimenting a woman is a great way to make her find somebody else. Change the stupid way that most other women in the world react to compliments and it will be much easier to get your boyfriend to compliment you regularly.

[WIJG]

OP,

It's nothing to do with insecurity (at least not necessarily). His behavior is within the common variation. I'm like that too. Also, some guys like public displays of affection; others don't. A lot of things vary from guy to guy.

[majszownik]

try a different approach then. if you have already tried openly talking to him about it and giving him compliments in hopes he'll reciprocate and it didn't work, there's one more thing you can try.
stop giving him compliments and wait. he's gonna notice it and he's gonna miss it. and maybe then he's gonna get your point.

i'm really surprised by the voices of some men here that say OP shouldn't expect compliments and it's not his job to make her feel good... have you ever been in a relationship? i think both parties have the right to expect that their partner will strive to make them happy. like it or not, everybody needs validation and is vain to some extent. some people need compliments, some people need to be hit on often, some want frequent sex initiated by their partner - it all serves the purpose of making yourself feel good about yourself, feeling attractive.
you shouldn't base your self-esteem ONLY on the outside factors, but NOONE can derive their self-esteem only from within... unless they're fukking crazy and a narcissist.
cut the girl some slack.

[Attaus]

ITT a white knight wonders why his gf wont say anything nice about his 13" arms


SPOON PICS OR GTFO

come on misc srsly..

edit: in after sexy Pole

[wujustyle]

Fishing for compliments is unattractive.

If you need constant external validation of yourself that means you don't have much esteem.

Self-esteem is called SELF-esteem because it comes from one's self, not from other people.

[WIJG]

try a different approach then. if you have already tried openly talking to him about it and giving him compliments in hopes he'll reciprocate and it didn't work, there's one more thing you can try.
stop giving him compliments and wait. he's gonna notice it and he's gonna miss it. and maybe then he's gonna get your point.

i'm really surprised by the voices of some men here that say OP shouldn't expect compliments and it's not his job to make her feel good... have you ever been in a relationship? i think both parties have the right to expect that their partner will strive to make them happy. like it or not, everybody needs validation and is vain to some extent. some people need compliments, some people need to be hit on often, some want frequent sex initiated by their partner - it all serves the purpose of making yourself feel good about yourself, feeling attractive.
you shouldn't base your self-esteem ONLY on the outside factors, but NOONE can derive their self-esteem only from within... unless they're fukking crazy and a narcissist.
cut the girl some slack.

She's not at fault for desiring to be complemented. She's at fault for attributing the absence of compliments to his insecurity.

[jamestown0101]

Stop fishing for compliments from him, if it bothers you that much and is a dealbreaker then move on. There's no way to coerce compliments out of someone and have them still be genuine.

Stats: 5'3", 105 lbs

Love them Canadian girls. Developing a self esteem OP wont kill you. Its pretty simple. Flattery comes off flat and compliments will come when earned. Till then, stay classy~!

[Evolutionary1]

aren't you that virgin that thought she was dating a foreveralone?