How to respond to this text "Not Friendzoned, but '2nd choice'"

[YoBroseidon]

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=140980451
Basically, my relationship with this girl is :

I don't wanna write everything out, so I'll do a quick outline:

I hit on girl
Girl flirts back, but not show strong signals in my favor, does not deny me
I continue hitting on girl for fun, don't expect much
She comes out with "I've been talking to someone for 3 months" (they aren't bf/gf)
To continue flirting, I give her a "due date" for when this guy should ask her out, if he doesn't, I'll "step up my game"
Due date comes and I'm counting down til midnight when his time is up.
As soon as it hits midnight I quit texting
Finals end, she goes home, and I go home a few days after. (I live in Texas, Go to school in NJ)
A few days later she initiates text convo, she does this for the next 3 or so convos.
We talk everyday for about a week, then I cut it off and start talking to her every other day.
After a while of her telling me that she won't go on a date with me because she "has a guy", I convince her to go on a date to see if we 'click'

3 days ago I said something and questioned her feelings for me.
2 days ago she sends me:
"Okay heres the way it is: your not necessarily "friend zoned" but anyway i put it your my second choice, the other guy is first"
Yesterday she sends me: "So you never answered me yesterday..."
I still haven't answered her. lol

I didn't really expect to be her #1 choice, as we still have not hung out (I'm not back at school yet), but I have no idea how to reply/act to this text.

[jreach]

cut contact

[YoBroseidon]

cut contact

Lol bro, I'm not wanting to cut it with this girl.
As I said earlier, I didn't expect to be her #1, we have not hung out yet - why would I be her #1?

Any serious responses other than the cookie-cutter answers?

[auburnrunner]

Ignore her. Srs.

[Beararms]

You still want to get with her after she just said you are second best? LOLOLOL
Cut contact, find a different chick.

[YoBroseidon]

You still want to get with her after she just said you are second best? LOLOLOL
Cut contact, find a different chick.

God ya'll are literally retarded today. No surprise that every single one of ya'll suggesting the same thing are measly reps.

I have not hung out with her. I went into this knowing that I had competition (that she hangs out with on the regular).
Use some logic for once in your misc career: Why would I be her #1? The answer is that there is no reason that I would be number one, so why would I be mad at her that she said that?

We have plans to hang out, when that happens I am positive she won't like this other guy anymore, as I'm already rising in ranks by JUST texting (which I suck at). If I am still #2 after this date then yes, cutting contact will be the right choice.

Basically, what the question is, how do I answer this text, and then create the most attraction, all at the same time maintaining the future 'date.'
She texts me first 80% of the time (which shows me that she may just be playing games with this text).

If you are a virgin and/or never been in a serious relationship, do not answer this. As you do not have enough experience to tell me the optimal actions to take.
You being on the Misc is not enough credibility to accurately advise on a somewhat unique situation.

[wildchild11]

God ya'll are literally retarded today. No surprise that every single one of ya'll suggesting the same thing are measly reps.

I have not hung out with her. I went into this knowing that I had competition (that she hangs out with on the regular).
Use some logic for once in your misc career: Why would I be her #1? The answer is that there is no reason that I would be number one, so why would I be mad at her that she said that?

We have plans to hang out, when that happens I am positive she won't like this other guy anymore, as I'm already rising in ranks by JUST texting (which I suck at). If I am still #2 after this date then yes, cutting contact will be the right choice.

Basically, what the question is, how do I answer this text, and then create the most attraction, all at the same time maintaining the future 'date.'
She texts me first 80% of the time (which shows me that she may just be playing games with this text).

If you are a virgin and/or never been in a serious relationship, do not answer this. As you do not have enough experience to tell me the optimal actions to take.
You being on the Misc is not enough credibility to accurately advise on a somewhat unique situation.

cliffs: OP gets butt hurt when people give him advice he don't want.

You chasing this girl has literally caused her to casually disrespect you. "I'm a beautiful, special snowflake and you're lucky to be #2 in line. You can start by picking up my shopping."

No guy with a brain would want to be working from this frame of getting her approval. You force her to sht or get off the pot. Date: yes? no? Well I'm off to wheel another chick, see you.

I loled at how you keep mentioning that you havent been on a date yet. Well, thats the whole damn point isnt it? You arent going to.....She's using you for attention. Which you seem to be happy with.

Notice how the first time you didnt respond to her text, it made her uneasy... "Where's my attention toy? Where's my little puppy?" Yeah thats pretty close to her thought process.

[JJammiNN]

Lol bro, I'm not wanting to cut it with this girl.
As I said earlier, I didn't expect to be her #1, we have not hung out yet - why would I be her #1?

Any serious responses other than the cookie-cutter answers?

cookie-cut all contact. (srs)

She already sees you as second best so you're fighting an uphill battle.

If you really want to try to be her numero uno then just be straightforward and ask her to do something when you're in the same city. If she declines then disregard. She seems to just want attention.

[DaGhoul]

She'll always look at you as #2 if you continue to stick around. Even if they don't work out, she could find someone else and keep you #2. Never take a girl's word for that stuff. They change their mind every second. Put her in the backburner and pursue other girls. If she comes back to you, it's your choice if you wanna be with her.

[njkid123]

What school do you go to

[wildchild11]

She'll always look at you as #2 if you continue to stick around. Even if they don't work out, she could find someone else and keep you #2. Never take a girl's word for that stuff. They change their mind every second. Put her in the backburner and pursue other girls. If she comes back to you, it's your choice if you wanna be with her.

"sorry...you're my #3 now..I met two other girls."

[YoBroseidon]

cliffs: OP gets butt hurt when people give him advice he don't want.

You chasing this girl has literally caused her to casually disrespect you. "I'm a beautiful, special snowflake and you're lucky to be #2 in line. You can start by picking up my shopping."

No guy with a brain would want to be working from this frame of getting her approval. You force her to sht or get off the pot. Date: yes? no? Well I'm off to wheel another chick, see you.

I loled at how you keep mentioning that you havent been on a date yet. Well, thats the whole damn point isnt it? You arent going to.....She's using you for attention. Which you seem to be happy with.

Notice how the first time you didnt respond to her text, it made her uneasy... "Where's my attention toy? Where's my little puppy?" Yeah thats pretty close to her thought process.

Strong selective reading/assumptions.

1. Date has not been had yet since there has been no chance for a date.
2. Date is planned.
3. She texts first 80% of the time.
4. I usually wait 1-2 hours before answering her initial texts, and 10 mins+ for all subsequent texts, all the while her answering immediately.
5. This is not the first time I have not answered her text.
6. Cutting contact at this point makes me look like a butthurt *******. What has been my plan is to text some bs answer back, then cut contact until the date. The socially inept retards on this website think it is a good idea to appear as this butthurt ******* (I assume they think it makes them look alpha).

I still don't understand the logic that I should be all high and mighty in her eyes without prior 1on1 contact with her.

Also, I assume you have not read even the original post since you seem to lack the understanding that the reason for no date thus far is due to a physical separation of literally ~1000 miles.

[YoBroseidon]

She'll always look at you as #2 if you continue to stick around. Even if they don't work out, she could find someone else and keep you #2. Never take a girl's word for that stuff. They change their mind every second. Put her in the backburner and pursue other girls. If she comes back to you, it's your choice if you wanna be with her.

This is a decent answer, but in my 2nd post I make it clear that I am not the pursuant.

What school do you go to

Rider

[sargebrandon]

Thread is ****ing lolsy.

[SiNiStEr94]

What are you gonna do when she flakes on your date with her?

[BadumTish]

Seriously I hate when people make threads asking for advice, and then rage / get offended when its isnt the advice they want to hear.

srs. What the phuck? If you already know what you want to do, why are you here?

[Lloyd Braun]

OP everyone in this thread is giving you the right advice. Cut contact. You just don't want to hear it. This will not end well for you.

[YoBroseidon]

What are you gonna do when she flakes on your date with her?

Cut it, I'm not someone who gets oneitis easily, but she has given me little reason to cut contact.

Seriously I hate when people make threads asking for advice, and then rage / get offended when its isnt the advice they want to hear.

srs. What the phuck? If you already know what you want to do, why are you here?

Because it is bad advice (srs).
She has done nothing to show me that I should cut contact - everything is exactly as expected considering the situation.

I was expecting an answer that had me doing something before the misc-cookie-cutter answer of 'cut contact.' I came to hear what that should be. Not saying that I know exactly what/how to do what I want to do.

[sargebrandon]

Okay, well how about you come back in a month with an update since you seem to have your head on straighter than everyone else in here.

[stefano445]

tell her to only contact you for sex

[jayohthatman]

get out OP

[deltbrah]

if this works out you guys will have an awesome story to tell at your wedding.

"and then she told me that i was her second choice......and i knew she was the one"

[gurs]

wow, OP takes being beta to a whole new level.

[caretaker1]

No confident, high-value male would accept being an obvious "2nd choice". Wish her luck and find another gal.

[StrongMeat]

that girl is alpha as fukk wow

im getting hard reading her answers

post pics op

-StrongMeat-

[TheHeavyG]

"who is this?" ought do

[SpartanTraining]

i'd respond in about a week telling her that shes now 4th choice

[HoneycombBandit]

Text her this "Nobody said you were my first choice either, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't go on our date and have a good time."

[Iguesz]

Text her this "Nobody said you were my first choice either, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't go on our date and have a good time."

THIS

Dude op,ur better to text her this

[DERJEVPOO]

Text her this "Nobody said you were my first choice either, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't go on our date and have a good time."

No

THIS

Dude op,ur better to text her this

No



Disregard and grow some balls op. Step back and view this as if it was one of your friends. You'd probably think he has no self respect.