My Bulimia is killing me

[happyhappy]

My Bulimia is killing me off & on for the last four years i have been makeing myself sick at first i only did it one time a month then it with to about one time a week then everday sometimes four times a day then a good friend starting to ask me why i always look so sick i didn't have the guts to tell her what i have been so i stop haveing anyting to do with her but she would not have it she starting push me & i opened up to her she told me she knew what i have been up to the whole time i was in tears she help & stop for about a year but now i starting get them feelings again i want to tell my friend but i don't if i should because i have been doing for a month now & i don't have anyting to do with her i hide for her when i see i can't tell because i love her & i don't want to hurt her or make her mad she's been like a big sister to me

[bluescorpion]

I know that must be hard. I know several former bulimics and they have shared some of their torment with me. Is it possible you can see someone who specializes in this who can give you support and help you to heal? I know it is a common problem and one that can have very bad long-term effects, so please don't keep it to yourself!

[imperfectly_lou]

I'm really sorry to hear you sounding so sad

I'm a former anorexic and bulimic (I consider myself 90% recovered) so I hope my words can help you in some way....

There is a REASON, or there are REASONS why you are bulimic. And no, it is never just "I want to be thin" or similar. You will need professional help to work out what those reasons are and then to develop appropriate, healthy coping strategies.

For me, a large part of my eating disorders stemmed from a) perfectionism and b) my mother. I have been in various forms of therapy for 3 and a half years now to learn how to deal with these things without having to resort to using food. Its been a long, very hard road, but sooooo worth it

So in short, you need to seek professional help. A good website which can help you and refer you to a service in your area is www.sfwed.org

Good luck!

[Miranda]

i was anorexic & bulimic for years. i used to throw up 3-4 times a day. i’m now 99% cured - you never can tell. one of the most important things i learnt was the illness is located between your ears. once i decided i wasn’t going to throw up anymore i started my (slow) recovery.
nobody makes you throw up except yourself

bulimia is living hell. i wish you all the best with your struggle.

[onebratt08]

This breaks my heart! Please go see a psychologist and try to heal yourself. You are doing so much harm to your body. Whatever you are going through right now may be tough, but life is so worth living. Everyone here wants you to be healthy and happy in life.

[hawaii50]

definitely see a therapist.. i went through bulemia & anorexia... not pretty