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  1. #1
    Registered User BornAndBred's Avatar
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    List funny things to say to gf that is angry at you

    Lets make this thread a list of funny things to say to a gf that is pissed off at you or not talking to you, etc.

    Also, how many times would you contact a girl that is not talking to you before stopping? Either through email, phone or txt.
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  2. #2
    Registered User wmirza's Avatar
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    uh ur fat u stink.. u look fat in these pants..
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  3. #3
    Registered User saint iron's Avatar
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    "My girlfriend asked me to tease her, so i said, ok then fatty."
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  4. #4
    Registered User 02ls1cs's Avatar
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    "im not going to run and apologize like mommy and daddy always do"

    that really gets her going.

    her parents were a joke when it comes to laying down the law
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  5. #5
    Destroyer of Dreams Brutotal's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BornAndBred View Post
    Also, how many times would you contact a girl that is not talking to you before stopping? Either through email, phone or txt.
    I wouldn't call someone ignoring me, I'd go have fun.

    But anyhow,

    u mad?
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  6. #6
    Registered User geo41e's Avatar
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    Her: "rahh rahh rah blahh blahh blahh rahh rahh...."

    Me:*cough....look at her with a dumb struck face....turn around and continue watching TV...fart....giggle....*
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  7. #7
    Rep Power: Over 9000! Dysfunqtional's Avatar
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    her - "Do these jeans make me look fat?"
    you - "No, your face does"
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  8. #8
    Registered (ab)user dillingerescp's Avatar
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    Me - "Oh yeah, Emily !"
    Her - "Who the fuck is Emily?"
    "Friends come and go, but 200 pounds will always be 200 pounds."
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  9. #9
    Registered User mkpat's Avatar
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    "Hey I got a new car Monday!"
    "Oh really I want to see it, I miss you!"
    "Haha not really. I thought you werent talking to me...... goldigging whore"
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  10. #10
    Registered User niospecv's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dillingerescp View Post
    Me - "Oh yeah, Emily !"
    Her - "Who the fuck is Emily?"
    Teh funnay.
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  11. #11
    Banned Killer_Demo's Avatar
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    you did what to who for how much?
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  12. #12
    R U looking at ma pint? FatScottishGuy's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ryanthompson7 View Post
    her - "Do these jeans make me look fat?"
    you - "No, your face does"
    her - "Do these jeans make me look fat?"
    you - "No, its all the chocolate you eat"
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  13. #13
    Registered User Leon Phelps's Avatar
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    The best is keeping a straight face and keep agreeing with what they say.


    "Oh you're definitely right, I am a hyoooge *******. I know, all I ever do is be a smart ass, its terrible."

    ect..


    Done that plenty of times, 60% of the time - works everytime.
    When I get sad, I stop being sad. And be awesome instead.



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  14. #14
    Registered User user84810006551's Avatar
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    lol i always like saying "you know, anger is never good for the crowes feet beside your eyes"

    This one is golden for moms too
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  15. #15
    Overly prepared... Dawginitup16's Avatar
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    just be like oh well...............

    "Your friends are hotter anyways"
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  16. #16
    Registered User Blend's Avatar
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    My gf was sweating around her stomach and asked my:
    "Does this mean I'm losing fat in thas area"
    I said: "I hope so for you"
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  17. #17
    Registered User luckylynch's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BornAndBred View Post
    Lets make this thread a list of funny things to say to a gf that is pissed off at you or not talking to you, etc.

    Also, how many times would you contact a girl that is not talking to you before stopping? Either through email, phone or txt.
    I just dont say anything....i ignore them and laugh at them--

    Im good looking and can get whoever i like
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  18. #18
    Registered User BUGIE's Avatar
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    The best to say to a Girlfriend over an argument for being drunk would be the Winston Churchill quote:

    Bessie Braddock: Sir, you are drunk.
    Churchill: And you, madam, are ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober.
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  19. #19
    Registered User BUGIE's Avatar
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    If your gf tells you her breasts are too small, and asks how she can make them bigger?

    Tell her to rub them with toilet paper in an up and down fashion and they'll grow over time....

    No doubt she'll ask why?

    tell her: Worked for your butt, didn't it?
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  20. #20
    Registered User BUGIE's Avatar
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    Just tell them:


    "Is it that time of the month?" with a really stupid, innocent look.... I have no idea why but it always enrages them...

    look at your watch and tell them: "Whoooaaaa, It's a little early for PMS (even by your standard)!! isn't it?"

    You can say "Turn down the crazy a notch or 2 please"

    When they're complaining about you not listening, let them finish, wait ten or 15 secs with eye contact where your face basically says what do you want from me and theirs say "do you agree" and then say "sorry, what were you saying?"

    Shhhhhhhh, Don't get your G-string in a know
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  21. #21
    Registered User Neo1's Avatar
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    Hey sweetie I have some fresh squeezed penis juice just for you if you'd like!
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  22. #22
    MODerately strong plcsp's Avatar
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    Wait till they rant and moan about something for 20 minutes and look at them as if you are listening and then when they are done be like "so wait... what did you say I wasn't listening?"
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  23. #23
    U.S. Navy Sub Vet PhoenixBuff's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BUGIE View Post
    If your gf tells you her breasts are too small, and asks how she can make them bigger?

    Tell her to rub them with toilet paper in an up and down fashion and they'll grow over time....

    No doubt she'll ask why?

    tell her: Worked for your butt, didn't it?
    LOL! Good one.
    United States Navy Veteran - GO NAVY!
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  24. #24
    Registered User TDetroit's Avatar
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    In college, my roommate and I were watching the Godfather on TV. His gf calls and talks, and talks, and talks....
    So I'm getting annoyed because he didn't take it in the next room. He's getting annoyed because Michael Corleone is about to put the big hit on all of his enemies simultaneously while attending his son's baptism. finally he says to gf "Did you call about something important?" Asecond later he put the phone down and says, "she hung up." .

    We never heard from her again.
    At my house, we listen to both kinds of music: Led and Zeppelin!
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  25. #25
    photoshop wizard pondus_levo's Avatar
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    On a serious note...

    I would not recommend making jokes any time your woman is in emotional distressed, especially angry. All it will do is make things worse because she will feel you are not taking her seriously and that her feelings don't matter.
    Forever alone? Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=131498033

    You will never know your limits, unless you push yourself past the imaginary lines you have drawn in the sand. -me

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  26. #26
    Black Irish Regice's Avatar
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    Hey Below 30, do you have anything against Jews? You know the Jews have been the most persecuted people throughout the world, and you still insist on being an anti-Semite. I bet you're out there trying to instigate a pogrom!

    Take your ass back to st0rmfront.org because we don't like your supremacist types here. This board is pro-Israel and if you don't like it, you can just kill yourself. So what if the Jews have many high positions in science, politics, and entertainment? Don't be mad at us that you're too stupid living in a trailer park boning your sister. You see, we have this culture that stresses education and getting ahead. That's why Ashkenazi Jews score the highest on IQ tests than anyone else in the United States. Not that it matters. You know I'm Sephardic, btw. I have no problem acknowledging the accomplishments of others, however. Have you ever heard of Anne Frank? She was a sweet little girl who was persecuted by anti-Semites just as yourself. And why? Because she had dark hair and eyes? Well I'm sorry if the rest of the world cannot fit your definition of a "superior being" or a "master race" but you have to learn we are in the 21st century and need to move past that.

    The truth is, Jews aren't all a bunch of money-hungry, large nosed, near-sighted, curly haired, egg-headed, liars. No. That is YOUR definition of us. Frankly I could not give less of a damn. However, I would truly appreciate it if you would stop belittling us simply because you are mad you cannot accomplish what 2% of the US Population already has. Imagine that. Well hopefully you will learn in the future that just because one is circumsized and doesn't eat pork that they are human just like you.
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  27. #27
    VP of Pierce & Pierce PatBateman's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Regice View Post
    Hey Below 30, do you have anything against Jews? You know the Jews have been the most persecuted people throughout the world, and you still insist on being an anti-Semite. I bet you're out there trying to instigate a pogrom!

    Take your ass back to st0rmfront.org because we don't like your supremacist types here. This board is pro-Israel and if you don't like it, you can just kill yourself. So what if the Jews have many high positions in science, politics, and entertainment? Don't be mad at us that you're too stupid living in a trailer park boning your sister. You see, we have this culture that stresses education and getting ahead. That's why Ashkenazi Jews score the highest on IQ tests than anyone else in the United States. Not that it matters. You know I'm Sephardic, btw. I have no problem acknowledging the accomplishments of others, however. Have you ever heard of Anne Frank? She was a sweet little girl who was persecuted by anti-Semites just as yourself. And why? Because she had dark hair and eyes? Well I'm sorry if the rest of the world cannot fit your definition of a "superior being" or a "master race" but you have to learn we are in the 21st century and need to move past that.

    The truth is, Jews aren't all a bunch of money-hungry, large nosed, near-sighted, curly haired, egg-headed, liars. No. That is YOUR definition of us. Frankly I could not give less of a damn. However, I would truly appreciate it if you would stop belittling us simply because you are mad you cannot accomplish what 2% of the US Population already has. Imagine that. Well hopefully you will learn in the future that just because one is circumsized and doesn't eat pork that they are human just like you.

    ??
    I have to return some videotapes.
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    her: "Blah blah blah"

    Me: "It's cute how stupid you are." *pats her on the head*
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    (actually happened)....She had a key to my house

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    Originally Posted by Regice View Post
    Hey Below 30, do you have anything against Jews? You know the Jews have been the most persecuted people throughout the world, and you still insist on being an anti-Semite. I bet you're out there trying to instigate a pogrom!

    Take your ass back to st0rmfront.org because we don't like your supremacist types here. This board is pro-Israel and if you don't like it, you can just kill yourself. So what if the Jews have many high positions in science, politics, and entertainment? Don't be mad at us that you're too stupid living in a trailer park boning your sister. You see, we have this culture that stresses education and getting ahead. That's why Ashkenazi Jews score the highest on IQ tests than anyone else in the United States. Not that it matters. You know I'm Sephardic, btw. I have no problem acknowledging the accomplishments of others, however. Have you ever heard of Anne Frank? She was a sweet little girl who was persecuted by anti-Semites just as yourself. And why? Because she had dark hair and eyes? Well I'm sorry if the rest of the world cannot fit your definition of a "superior being" or a "master race" but you have to learn we are in the 21st century and need to move past that.

    The truth is, Jews aren't all a bunch of money-hungry, large nosed, near-sighted, curly haired, egg-headed, liars. No. That is YOUR definition of us. Frankly I could not give less of a damn. However, I would truly appreciate it if you would stop belittling us simply because you are mad you cannot accomplish what 2% of the US Population already has. Imagine that. Well hopefully you will learn in the future that just because one is circumsized and doesn't eat pork that they are human just like you.
    Do you not possess awareness to the fact that the arrangment of certain persons in this manner can, in some instances, be attributed to the symptoms incurred by a severe medical condition, which manifests itself in the sufferer's body and renders them so? One such example of a person would be my paternal grandfather. He served as an infantryman during the Second World War. He suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder as a consequence of the detonation of a landmine roughly 30ft away from him in the midst of a battle. This conjuncture has left him with austere jitteriness and anmesia, to the extent that he can barely remember his own name, but this exemplification is probably of miniscule disquietude to you. Auspiciously, I am not one of these persons. I stand at a respectable height of 6'4" and possess 245lbs of relatively lean body mass, as a consequence of the myofibrillar hypertrophy I strive to stimulate on a daily basis by way of arduous physical exertion. I would take great delight in seeing you say something of this nature to my grandfather in my presence. However, this occurence would be nothing more than conceptual, owing to the fact that you are nothing more than a durable chap of the Internet's fair. The abstraction of you in reality saying something like this to somebody, with the absence of the Internet as a medium of communication, is of considerable ambiguity to me. Just my hypothesis; I would be most intrigued to hear yours. Oh, how I must apologize, for it is of bountiful likelihood that you possess neither an anterior lobe nor a spinal column. I alternatively, would be more than willing to assist you in the acquisition of a board, that you may one day render a visit to ascertain whether or not you possess the testicular fortitude to express these sentiments towards somebody of my familiarity.
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