Damned if you do Damned if you don't

[saracattay]

Last week I read a comment in a womens fitness mag that read something like...teens who weigh themselves daily have a greater risk of having a eating disorder. Being a mother of 2 teens it got me to thinking (I hate it when I do that). Which is more harmful, having a parent that is weighing, measuring, lifting, supplementing, preaching the lifestyle, on a regular basis. Or having a parent that is weighing more, measuring larger, lifting the Big Mac, supplementing with Large fries, and preaching the lifestyle on a regular basis.
I really don't have a personal opinion yet; I think alot of variables come into play. I'm just curious to hear some opinions especially from those who have children.

[Rhinoclan]

I have four kids, and try never to preach about nutrition, but rather encourage them to make healthy choices and to exercise. I do all the cooking, so for instance, my kids love pancakes. I'll make pancakes with protein powder, cottage cheese, egg whites, and chocolate chips. They taste great, and healthy for the kids, and they get what they like too. I find doing things like this easier than trying to stand on a soap box. Other times, I'll ask them if they want to go play catch, or run pass patterns, or place horse, or tennis, or just go for a walk (well, I walk, they rollerblade). I don't ban any food, but don't buy a lot of junk food either. I have no idea if my way is going to work out in the long run

[emmie]

I'm not a parent, but I grew up with a mother who was overweight and constantly on some sort of diet or another. Her unhappiness with her body was palpable. She denied herself food all day, and then overate at night, and she was embarassed about her appearance. I'm certainly not blaming my mother for my 15+ year eating disorder, but I do know that I picked up from her some powerful messages about food, control, body image, and self-worth.

Not sure if this helps you sort out your feelings about the matter, but I thought I'd share my experience.

[GSCampbell]

My personal opinion is "somewhere in between."

I am the father of three young daughters (8, 6, and 3) and my wife and I try to model a healthy lifestyle. This is to say that we try to model eating good food, getting rest, taking your daily vitamin, being active, etc.

We do not model constant weigh-ins, measurements, etc.

If the girls want to stop at McDonald's once a week, I am OK with that. If it got to the point that we were doing that 3, 4, 13 times a week I would be worried and wouldn't want to convey that to my kids.

Likewise I don't want my girls to become obsessed or panic when it comes to food and/or body image. This point really hit home about two years ago when one of the friends of my oldest said something along the lines of, "My mom says that fries will make you a fat pig and boys won't like you." Bear in mind this was coming out of the mouth of a 6 year old.

I guess our bottom line has been to try to instill the notion of eating good foods, getting exercise and good rest.

Just my $0.02

[jocularric]

As a father of four girls I worry about the eating disorders. The thing is about our lifestyle is that we preach proper nutrition and being fit--Not just looking thin. And I think that is the difference. A lot of those out there who suffer from these diseases don't have an understanding of good nutrition or fitness. My girls are fit and so far as I can tell they eat good too. I fix them breakfast nearly every school day morning. So I know they at least start the day off good.

I think it is more dangerous to give in to a fast easy meal. It's easy to over do it there.

[ChocoChick]

I think it is good my kids, especially my daughters (almost 15 and 8), see that I work out, eat well, and generally take care of myself. I don't weigh myself daily, I don't talk about my weight in front of them and I am not over the top about food, imo. I will eat the occasional cookie and I have to have my chocolate ( ), but my overall eating is very good -- lots of veggies, lean proteins and complex carbs. All my kids tell me that I am in better shape than the other moms they know. And when their friends come over, I get a lot of compliments.

My 15yo brings salads, fruit, nuts, etc. to school for lunch while her classmates are eating fast food. My 8yo reads nutrition labels and tells me how much a fat or sugar a food contains All 3 kids are interested in weight training and all are very active. They are all lean and very healthy.

So I think it is all good.

[redweston]

too much of any thing, may cause problems in kids, you just have to do your best. My kids never had sugar cearls or white bread until they started doing sleep overs, they still turned out ok !
Keep On Pumpin!
red

[Jordo1]

Originally Posted by jocularric

As a father of four girls I worry about the eating disorders. The thing is about our lifestyle is that we preach proper nutrition and being fit--Not just looking thin. And I think that is the difference. A lot of those out there who suffer from these diseases don't have an understanding of good nutrition or fitness. My girls are fit and so far as I can tell they eat good too. I fix them breakfast nearly every school day morning. So I know they at least start the day off good.

I think it is more dangerous to give in to a fast easy meal. It's easy to over do it there.

Exactly! What you posted from the article doesn't state what your asking about. You DIDN'T say the article said "teens that are taught good fitness and nutrition daily have a greater risk of having a eating disorder".

I haven't read the article, but I would imagine that teens that are weighing themselves daily are doing it for "self image" and learning that you have to be skinny from models in the magazines, not learning the true aspects of fitness and nutrition. They see the model, want to look like her, weigh themselves, and stop eating.

I have 2 teens at home. One wants to gain weight and one wants to lose weight. BTW, it's the daughter that wants to gain weight. But, until my wife and I got into transforming our bodies, neither one of them showed any interest in fitness or nutrition. My son just thought he wasn't supposed to eat so much (something that depressed him) and my daughter thought she was just supposed to eat more pizza, but figure out how without getting pimples.

[PeteB]

Originally Posted by saracattay

Which is more harmful, having a parent that is weighing, measuring, lifting, supplementing, preaching the lifestyle, on a regular basis. Or having a parent that is weighing more, measuring larger, lifting the Big Mac, supplementing with Large fries, and preaching the lifestyle on a regular basis.

Not to minimize the issues that people with eating disorders face, but I would say that the most common eating disorder is the same among adults and teens. Overeating.

I happened to be with a friend one Sunday when we had to deliver his son to the school parking lot to get on a bus for a trip, so I had a chance to look at a hundred kids at the same time, all around 12-13 years old. I would say about 25% had parents who put them on the Big Mac program supplemented with large fries long ago. By the time they graduate from HS, most of them have a lifetime of high cholesterol, medical problems and fad diets to look forward to.

[pastorgbc]

Originally Posted by saracattay

Last week I read a comment in a womens fitness mag that read something like...teens who weigh themselves daily have a greater risk of having a eating disorder. Being a mother of 2 teens it got me to thinking (I hate it when I do that). Which is more harmful, having a parent that is weighing, measuring, lifting, supplementing, preaching the lifestyle, on a regular basis. Or having a parent that is weighing more, measuring larger, lifting the Big Mac, supplementing with Large fries, and preaching the lifestyle on a regular basis.
I really don't have a personal opinion yet; I think alot of variables come into play. I'm just curious to hear some opinions especially from those who have children.

I am the father of four very healthy children, ages 20-16. Based on my buodybuilder's lifestyle, I have always been focused on my own health. My wife, although not a bodybuilder and not very athletic has always eaten very healthy. Here are some things that we have found:

1. Never, ever, put a child down because of their weight. Never ever weigh or measure your child.
2. Get your children involved in sports and athletic activities.
3. Have regularly scheduled sit down meals and make it mandatory that they be there except for the most extreme circumstances.
4. Serve your children good balanced meals. If they refuse to eat the veggies or something else on the plate, do not sub it for something else. They will learn very quickly that if they do not want to be hungry, they have to eat the food on their plate. My kids eat all veggies and types of meat.
5. Teach your kids portion control, especially with snacks.
6. Stress with your children that it is inner beauty that is far more important than external beauty. Take care of the inner person, and the outer person cannot help but to follow.

Ray

[Mr. Someday]

Great thread saracattay! My wife and I both compete, so we are nutrition nazi's when it comes to prep time and keep our nutrition fairly strict the rest of the year as well. We choose to lead by example, but at the same time, neither of our kids have a weight issue in the slightest, so we just let them eat what they wanrt for the most part trying to make sure that we set some parameters (like no Coke in the morning with their cereal! lol). They can McDonalds a couple of times during the week, enjoy a pizza or two, eat sugary cereals, etc. We also try and help them get some good stuff that they do like in them like steak, potatos, milk, lean cold cuts, veggies, etc. But we are probably about as lax as anyone you'll ever meet who is so rigid themselves. We aren't going to force the issue with them as they have zero weight issues....we have more important battles to fight (like homework! lol). Leading by example we figure will give them some good insight when the day comes maybe they want to become more active or take their sports to a higher level.

[Revmachine21]

My 0.02 cents, if the only behavior you demonstrate in front of children is a daily weigh in on a scale, maybe you are damned.

But if you are also demonstrating a daily awareness of proper nutrition, concern that you eat enough and not starve yourself, and a willingness to a well rounded diet with P/C/F's, then I don't think you are damned in the least!

Looking back, I used to not weigh myself routinely but I starved myself the first 12 hours of almost every day of my adult lift, then binged the last 3-4 hours. And most days I wasn't aware of what I was doing. A pretty unhealthy lifestyle... wouldn't recommend it.

When I found this forum & started learning, the sense of illumination was palpable.

[back2it]

When I am trying to gain or lose weight I weigh myself every day and measure once a week. I feel that knowing what is going on daily allows me to know right away if what I ate and did yesterday is helping or hurting . During these times I keep a pretty good journal or weight ,exercise and diet. I feel minor corrections on a daily basis are better than big corrections after I have gained too much fat or I am losing too much lean body mass.
But when I am not on a bulk or cut and just floating along I weigh in once a week, put the tape away and rely a little more on the mirror.

[saracattay]

Wow, a lot of great comments!! I guess when it comes to our children we all want the best. My sons are 17 and 15. the oldest plays on the HS soccer team and runs 3 hours a day, so he doesn't worry about anything except "What is there to eat?" and my 15 year old does F.ball and then wrestling. He does weigh every day during wrestling season. We have a scale but it's in my bathroom and it doesn't get used too often. Thank you all for your comments!

P.S. Jordo- If you are reading articles in womens fitness magazines...I'm not sure I'd tell anyone.

[Jordo1]

Originally Posted by saracattay

P.S. Jordo- If you are reading articles in womens fitness magazines...I'm not sure I'd tell anyone.

LOL, I read whatever's in the bathroom at the time...