Was your father an affectionate man?

[GuineaDago585]

See, I grew up believing men are not supposed to be affectionate with their children. Love them, support them, teach them, of course all of that is important. But acting overly emotional seemed wrong. I can count on one hand the number of times my father hugged me or said “I love you” in my entire life, and that never bothered me because the example he set was worth more.

But in discussing this topic with friends, I learned my experience differed. A lot of dads do give their sons a hug and even kiss on the forehead which sounded weird AF to me. Are men supposed to act like this towards their children?.

Was your dad affectionate when you were growing up?

[Getter_done]

Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

I had to make this post lol sorry, anyways back to the thread.

[volleys]

You're like the polar opposite of mbisonson

[FoulSmell]

See, I grew up believing men are not supposed to be affectionate with their children. Love them, support them, teach them, of course all of that is important. But acting overly emotional seemed wrong. I can count on one hand the number of times my father hugged me or said “I love you” in my entire life, and that never bothered me because the example he set was worth more.

But in discussing this topic with friends, I learned my experience differed. A lot of dads do give their sons a hug and even kiss on the forehead which sounded weird AF to me. Are men supposed to act like this towards their children?.

Was your dad affectionate when you were growing up?

I laughed when I saw the title, at just how non affectionate my dad was.

[Reserrection]

Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it.

I had to make this post lol sorry, anyways back to the thread.

This.

In other words, no

[Paul Kreul]

In b4 MBisonSon.

came in expecting first reply or OP to mention him.

leaving satisfied


To OP-my father was a wife beater and my mom left him when I was very little, my step-dad was Jewish, a great man, taught me how to make it on my own, had me working when I was 12 for the entire block, mowing lawns, washing cars, but was extremely unaffectionate, think I got a hug maybe twice from him and one of them was after he spanked me for disobeying my mother (I was 7), he hugged me after and said it was necessary to understand the consequences of my actions.

Even though he was not very affectionate, he was the greatest man I've ever known.

I do believe my marriage has suffered at times because I have become like my dad, hard working, full of integrity, but not very affectionate

[8pieces]

Not to me but to grandkids yes

[latverian41]

You know a guy is swimming in insecurities and has a total lack of self confidence if he thinks raising his son to become a good man has anything to do with not having emotions or not giving love and affection.

My father always taught me to never hit a woman even if she strikes me first, on the flip side of that I had a grandmother who raised me who would always tell.me if a woman wants to act like a.man and she hits you knock her on her azz.

Who do you think I listened to and have always strive to follow?

It sure wasn't my grannie. Not when it came to that advice anyways

[Fang2]

He is neutral. But he prefers spending his money on my younger sister. Bought her a 40k truck, while he gave me his cheap car when I was her age.

[Bo_Flecks]

No. My dad didn’t tell me he loved me until I was 18. I, however, tell my son I love him multiple times a day.

[latverian41]

No. My dad didn’t tell me he loved me until I was 18. I, however, tell my son I love him multiple times a day.

Repped.

My son's mother tries to tell.me.my boy doesn't need to hear "I love you every day"

Lol I still shake my head in disbelief every time I hear that but considering the way her parents neglected/treated her sadly I guess it's not unexpected.

Yeah though dude. Your son not just deserves to hear that daily he needs to hear that daily. You will never have a more important job ,role or function in your life than to lead by example for your son.

[Paul Kreul]

On a side not OP, there is a great book called The Sins of My Father that examines many of the prominent atheist intellectuals throughout history, Freud, Marx, Carnegie, about 20-30 in total ..and every single one of them either had abusive or absante fathers.

There is a direct relation between a son's relationship with his earthly dad, that he will have with his heavenly one

[Legz422]

Repped.

My son's mother tries to tell.me.my boy doesn't need to hear "I love you every day"

Lol I still shake my head in disbelief every time I hear that but considering the way her parents neglected/treated her sadly I guess it's not unexpected.

Yeah though dude. Your son not just deserves to hear that daily he needs to hear that daily. You will never have a more important job ,role or function in your life than to lead by example for your son.

WTF? I still tell my son that I love him and he's a full grown adult. He comes over once a week and every time he leaves to go home I tell him I love him.

[latverian41]

WTF? I still tell my son that I love him and he's a full grown adult. He comes over once a week and every time he leaves to go home I tell him I love him.

I know it's fuked up and her reason and precedent she used was telling me "my oldest son's father doesn't tell.him he loves him every day"

Lol just thought to my self. "And you praise that instead of ridiculing it?"

Like I said though her parents did not show her the love and affection she needed growing up so maybe it stems from that I don't know..

[ralphlaurenbrah]

Yeah he was and you better end the cycle that's ****ed up to not be affectionate to your kids srs. They NEED it.

[coast2coastam]

Yeah, he'd hug me and told me he loved me. He'd drive across the country to pick me up when my car broke down at the drop of a hat when I needed it. Anything I needed he'd do. He was a really great guy and I miss him.

[Ironmanlet]

Not with any of his children, or himself.

I do imagine he felt love while he banging the fat ugly sluts he picked up off the side of the road.

Besides that it is all unwarranted arrogance and narcissism.

Biggest piece of **** I have met so far.

Srs

[jimbob007]

No, I think he was a Schizoid like me.

[GaryRidgway]

Nah he was an azzhole. Never really taught me anything about life.

[wasp9166]

No

Both my parents were sh

I have nothing to do with either one of them

You had one shot

You blew it

Cya

[elterrible987]

came in expecting first reply or OP to mention him.

leaving satisfied


To OP-my father was a wife beater and my mom left him when I was very little, my step-dad was Jewish, a great man, taught me how to make it on my own, had me working when I was 12 for the entire block, mowing lawns, washing cars, but was extremely unaffectionate, think I got a hug maybe twice from him and one of them was after he spanked me for disobeying my mother (I was 7), he hugged me after and said it was necessary to understand the consequences of my actions.

Even though he was not very affectionate, he was the greatest man I've ever known.

I do believe my marriage has suffered at times because I have become like my dad, hard working, full of integrity, but not very affectionate

women lie so much you have to wonder whether your mother lied or embellished how much he was actually abusive

[blueberryboy]

Nah my dad wasn't affectionate at all. No hugging no " I love you "

Great father tho I got no complaints growing up just wasn't that type of guy

[Legz422]

I know it's fuked up and her reason and precedent she used was telling me "my oldest son's father doesn't tell.him he loves him every day"

Lol just thought to my self. "And you praise that instead of ridiculing it?"

Like I said though her parents did not show her the love and affection she needed growing up so maybe it stems from that I don't know..

Yeah prob stems from that but people need to break those bad cycles.

Yeah he was and you better end the cycle that's ****ed up to not be affectionate to your kids srs. They NEED it.

Agree with this.

[Akd123]

My dad and i get drunk and beat the chit out of each other. Forget about the next day. Call that whatever the fuk you wanna call it

[latverian41]

No

Both my parents were sh

I have nothing to do with either one of them

You had one shot

You blew it

Cya

Hey wasp. I was just wondering if you were still around earlier today.


Hope all has been well..

I finally got the drinking beat. Took a lot of tries but finally got it right.

[Dontoewsmebro]

He was a great man passed away 4 years ago... Sadly, an alcoholic, but very loving. I'm an only child, and he would try to hide his drinking from me, but I knew he drank alot because he would always yell at my mom about the most random things like saying "If it wasn't for me you would be a whore!" Then when he would see me using the bathroom in the hallway he would change his tone, and be like "oh hey hehe didn't know you were still up?"

The good part is he was never physically violent towards her just a lot of verbal abuse. I once told him "Maybe calm down your drinking cuz you're cool when sober, and drinking, but it's the fukking whiskey"

He was good when drinking beers, but whiskey he would go crazy. RIP to a great man.

[Dontoewsmebro]

In b4 MBisonSon.

fukingg lmaooo

[Godfrd824]

My father was and still is very affectionate. My mother though is on another level, it's smothering.

[coast2coastam]

My dad and i get drunk and beat the chit out of each other. Forget about the next day. Call that whatever the fuk you wanna call it

Pretty based of it's good natured lol

[guest89]

Fairly decent as far as being affectionate/a great father when I was young then he went through some schit when I was a young teen. We had a pretty big falling out when I was 16. Nearly shot him at one point. He was methed/coked up out of his mind and got violent. Really didn't speak to him/see him/have any relationship with him until I hit my late 20s. We picked up right where we left off before he lost his sh!t. Like true men obviously we never discussed the incident or hashed anything out. We just ignore that it never happened.



When I was younger I was fairly angry that at 16 I basically had to grow up. Quit school. Start working. And most importantly, figure life out on my own without any help from either parent. I got fukked out of all of the great 'experiences' most people get when they are 16-24 as far as with HS/College and all that stuff. Now that I'm older I recognize it made me stronger and set me up for a strong work ethic/drive to succeed on my own.



I don't harbor any resentment anymore. He really was a great Dad up until the time I was around 15. And those years prior to that set me up for success/made me the man that was needed to make it through the hard times.