Anyone else just prefer being single

[Silencespeaks]

No I love going on maintenance dates at overpriced sit down restaurants.
No I love watching shows/movies I have no interest in and would not be watching otherwise.
No I love interacting with her family/friends all of whom I know I will never interact with again if we break up.
No I love wasting money on crap for birthday, Christmas, Valentine's Day, anniversary.

Yup there are major costs to a relationship. Time, energy, money. Having to deal with their friends and family, having to deal with their problems and issues etc.

That’s why it’s only worth it if it’s really the right person who you really like and enjoy being around.

And I always disagree with the typical dating advice to just settle for someone you’re not really into. Because how could the benefits of a relationship ever outweigh the costs if you’re not even into that person? That only makes sense for people who legit cannot deal with being alone.

[messomi]

lol at settling for someone you really don't even like that's for the kind of people that are horrified to be alone I can't even imagine being one of those.

[Silencespeaks]

lol at settling for someone you really don't even like that's for the kind of people that are horrified to be alone I can't even imagine being one of those.

Agreed but I think it’s very common. And typical dating advice to women.

Would actually be interesting to know the percentage of relationships where at least one side is only there because they don’t want to be alone or for money or kids or some other external reason. I bet it’s a significant percentage.

[sword_]

You probably just feel like you lose your freedom with the girls you've dated.

Also I realized I won't be able to turn off my attraction to other women, but I can choose not to pursue them or get their #, add them to IG, or stuff like that.

But anyways GravityLee the grass is always greener.

[Legz422]

Agreed but I think it’s very common. And typical dating advice to women.

Would actually be interesting to know the percentage of relationships where at least one side is only there because they don’t want to be alone or for money or kids or some other external reason. I bet it’s a significant percentage.

Yep, we're told all the time on here that we should just settle. I really don't understand that advice coming from guys, because it basically means using someone just to be in a relationship.

I'd also bet that's a significant percentage. Sad, really.

[RoyalRyy]

Relationships are flat out boring to me... pretending to care about stuff that isn't sex? No thx jeff.

I'm in this boat tbh. I hope that mindset changes as I get older because I definitely want kids one day but as of right now all I care about is sex.

[Jimbo0731]

Y'all act like relationships don't require work. Has anything in this world that is ever worth anything required zero work exist? Sure being single is easy but if you actually have a gf/wife that values you and the relationship then you get a lot of benefits that being single will never allow or make incredibly more difficult.

[GiveMeTheD]

I prefer being in a relationship.

But I certainly work harder, spend more time doing hobbies outside of one, so it's difficult at times.

I agree with people who say that when you're in a relationship you dream of having more time to yourself, but when you're single the grass is always greener. Such is life we always want what we don't have.

[ErnieMccracken]

Yep, we're told all the time on here that we should just settle. I really don't understand that advice coming from guys, because it basically means using someone just to be in a relationship.

I'd also bet that's a significant percentage. Sad, really.

That advice is given to women who are actively searching for a relationship, bemoaning "bUt ThErE's nO GoOd MeN lEfT!" If you are a woman, simply by existing, you will have dozens upon dozens of guys pursuing you for a relationship. Thirst is infinite. If you can't find a single one worth your time, that's on you. If you don't want to settle for less than a Disney Prince, that's great, but don't blame a lack of options for your unrealized relationship goals.

[ssilv]

As long as you are happy OP.

[ErnieMccracken]

I genuinely have a hard time comprehending the fact that there are still women that demand a guy pay for them. I know they're out there but is this really that common? I would feel so audacious.

Yes, especially in expensive cities. Respect to women. They are shameless about their time not being free.

[guest89]

I've never been in a rush for a relationship. Not into feeling tied down, pressured, stressed, etc. 32 and I think I've finally met someone worth spending my time with. Not in a huge rush for anything too serious but she's the type of person I could see myself being with long term. Has the following qualities, wouldn't date someone without them.

-Career driven and earns more then I do.
-Completely independent from family.
-Cooks good and maintains an immaculate apartment.
-Doesn't require gifts or me spending money on. Doesn't need to 'go out'.
-Cool with just hanging out cooking at home, watching movies, working out, doing outdoors stuff, etc.
-Cool with the concept of never signing legal documentation to get 'married'.
-Pretty much down for whatever.
-Low social media profile. Pretty much only texts/calls family a few close friends and coworkers.

[shadow_flare]

Been single for about 7 years now and I'm enjoying the hell out of it every freaking minute. Last gf was such a freaking needy downer. Her awful habits, super negativity, inability to accept change, jealousy, and stupidity really messed me up for a long time. Ended up ruining a long term friendship I had with this chick since elementary school. Dated other people here and there, but nothing serious. Eventually came to the conclusion that I'm better off focusing on me, what I want to do, and my own personal goals. I prefer being single, I want nothing serious and I want nothing to do with kids of my own.

[SkinnyKappa]

dunno never tried anything but being single but probably can’t do it with a biological female

Thanks! We've actually known each other for a few years. I was married when we met, he was with someone else. Threw something out on FB that I wanted a date to a movie I wanted to see and he took me up on it. Profit.

where are the coping miscers?

[Legz422]

That advice is given to women who are actively searching for a relationship, bemoaning "bUt ThErE's nO GoOd MeN lEfT!" If you are a woman, simply by existing, you will have dozens upon dozens of guys pursuing you for a relationship. Thirst is infinite. If you can't find a single one worth your time, that's on you. If you don't want to settle for less than a Disney Prince, that's great, but don't blame a lack of options for your unrealized relationship goals.

lol It's not about not settling for less than a Disney Prince. How many mid 40's to around early 50's men do you know that live a healthy lifestyle like I do? I really don't know many and the ones I do know of, are taken. Why would I want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't have similar interests/lifestyle as me?

[AniMaLizTik]

lol It's not about not settling for less than a Disney Prince. How many mid 40's to around early 50's men do you know that live a healthy lifestyle like I do? I really don't know many and the ones I do know of, are taken. Why would I want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't have similar interests/lifestyle as me?

you don't have health conscious guys your age in your gym? the gym is the new tinder.

[ErnieMccracken]

Thanks! We've actually known each other for a few years. I was married when we met, he was with someone else. Threw something out on FB that I wanted a date to a movie I wanted to see and he took me up on it. Profit.

OK honest question- is the kid thing as big of a deal as misc makes it out to be? I've never dated a single mom, but it seems like western society is trending heavily to the dual mating strategy.

[ErnieMccracken]

lol It's not about not settling for less than a Disney Prince. How many mid 40's to around early 50's men do you know that live a healthy lifestyle like I do? I really don't know many and the ones I do know of, are taken. Why would I want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't have similar interests/lifestyle as me?

I'm not even in that age group and can name at least 10 older dudes who I know from the gym, tennis, work, et al. Much more common to see in shape men than women at that age. I know it's still rare, but come on, it's when you stack bodyfat % + tall + full head of hair + millionaire + socially connected + whatever else he needs to be. That's when you run into the "no good men left" problem.

[RedRusty]

OK honest question- is the kid thing as big of a deal as misc makes it out to be? I've never dated a single mom, but it seems like western society is trending heavily to the dual mating strategy.

I've dated guys over the past couple of years both with and without kids, and they have had no issue with me being a single mom. I guess it just depends on the guy. I've also made it abundantly clear I'm not looking for anyone to support me or my child, I do just fine on that myself, so I don't know if that factors into it.

[TheTyler2013]

A big no brother..
I just ended a 3.5 years relationship and it was the worst thing I ever done.

Why would I prefer to swing on tinder like a virgin FA..
I'm getting older and older.. hair changes (falls), you get fatter..
Why would u want to keep chasing oussy and fck once a month, instead of having someone to be with every day, cook for u, share stories with u, and fxk u 24/7 no questions?

Damn I have a depression because of this chit

Worst decision I ever made.

[ErnieMccracken]

having someone to be with every day, cook for u, share stories with u, and fxk u 24/7 no questions?

lol that's what your last relationship was like? You dun fukked up.

[ErnieMccracken]

I've dated guys over the past couple of years both with and without kids, and they have had no issue with me being a single mom. I guess it just depends on the guy. I've also made it abundantly clear I'm not looking for anyone to support me or my child, I do just fine on that myself, so I don't know if that factors into it.

Curious if you meet these guys on dating apps or through social circles?

[RedRusty]

Curious if you meet these guys on dating apps or through social circles?

Both. Mainly dating apps before, the person I'm dating now I met when I used to do karaoke regularly. He was a friend of a friend.

[billyjeanking1]

Yep, we're told all the time on here that we should just settle. I really don't understand that advice coming from guys, because it basically means using someone just to be in a relationship.

I'd also bet that's a significant percentage. Sad, really.

Wanna date?

[billyjeanking1]

Both. Mainly dating apps before, the person I'm dating now I met when I used to do karaoke regularly. He was a friend of a friend.

Pics?

[GiveMeTheD]

A big no brother..
I just ended a 3.5 years relationship and it was the worst thing I ever done.

Why would I prefer to swing on tinder like a virgin FA..
I'm getting older and older.. hair changes (falls), you get fatter..
Why would u want to keep chasing oussy and fck once a month, instead of having someone to be with every day, cook for u, share stories with u, and fxk u 24/7 no questions?

Damn I have a depression because of this chit

Worst decision I ever made.

Tie someone down quick if you're having a breakdown at 23. I am 30, and 90 percent of the girls over 25 are fat, ugly or have a kid.

You can still pick up some unspoilt 21 year old.

[pondus_levo]

Advantages and disadvantages to both, just depends on what side of the line you are standing. Sounds like you are standing on the disadvantages side.

Personally the only thing that's kept me from getting into a relationship, since my divorce, is that I have not found a single women that I answer "Yes" to the question: Is she worth making sacrifices and compremises for?" Because, lets be real, it doesn't matter how "perfect" you are for each other, you will have to make compromises and sacrifices.

A big no brother..
I just ended a 3.5 years relationship and it was the worst thing I ever done.

Why would I prefer to swing on tinder like a virgin FA..
I'm getting older and older.. hair changes (falls), you get fatter..
Why would u want to keep chasing oussy and fck once a month, instead of having someone to be with every day, cook for u, share stories with u, and fxk u 24/7 no questions?

Damn I have a depression because of this chit

Worst decision I ever made.

1.) Age: 23
2.) If you were happy, you would not have broken up.
3.) notice how you write about "general" things about a relationship that you miss? ...because you don't miss her, you just miss the benefits. Think about it and get over it, then move on.

[Legz422]

you don't have health conscious guys your age in your gym? the gym is the new tinder.

Most of the guys in my regular gym are younger. There are a couple that look like they may be my age, but I have no idea if they're single or not.

I'm not even in that age group and can name at least 10 older dudes who I know from the gym, tennis, work, et al. Much more common to see in shape men than women at that age. I know it's still rare, but come on, it's when you stack bodyfat % + tall + full head of hair + millionaire + socially connected + whatever else he needs to be. That's when you run into the "no good men left" problem.

I don't know anyone at work my age who is fit and into lifting. There are a bunch of 30somethings, but they're too young. Plus married/in relationships. And don't lump me in with the height, hair, money and status requirement gang. That's not me at all.

I've dated guys over the past couple of years both with and without kids, and they have had no issue with me being a single mom. I guess it just depends on the guy. I've also made it abundantly clear I'm not looking for anyone to support me or my child, I do just fine on that myself, so I don't know if that factors into it.

Same. I've never had a guy have an issue with the fact that I have a kid. When I was actively dating/online he was around 13-14ish. I made it clear I could only see them when my son was with his dad, that even though he was of age to stay home alone I wasn't about that life of leaving him at home to meet up with a guy. They were willing to wait a week if need be to see me.

Wanna date?

Sorry I don't date miscers.

[axiom15]

I'd prefer to word it as being alone, not single. Being single to enjoy "choice" just shows how low you think of yourself

[armies]

Let's not forget the fact that sex takes a LOT, I mean a LOT of energy, it literally zaps all the energy out of you, srs