You know what they say, never trust a fart over 40.
I forget this rule a couple times a year. Almost forgot it today... almost.
It would have been a disaster!
We've all been there.
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Results 1 to 30 of 60
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03-14-2018, 03:43 AM #1I lift dead people.
- Join Date: Sep 2013
- Location: United States
- Posts: 8,387
- Rep Power: 43854
When was the last time you crapped your pants?
A man who views the world the same at 50 as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.
Muhammad Ali
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03-14-2018, 05:21 AM #2Registered User
- Join Date: Jul 2011
- Location: New York, United States
- Posts: 15,251
- Rep Power: 123365
I mean really?
Really?☻/
/▌
/ \ Don't care what you do crew.
Former natty ☠ 101- lift heavy things consistently over time as often as you can recover from.
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03-14-2018, 05:28 AM #3Registered User
- Join Date: Nov 2016
- Location: Ontario, Canada
- Age: 58
- Posts: 3,257
- Rep Power: 53795
Note to self: never squat with JediRN
Please record my time/reps if I pass out
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03-14-2018, 05:48 AM #4Da1UnV
- Join Date: Dec 2005
- Location: Bronx, New York, United States
- Age: 59
- Posts: 43,414
- Rep Power: 198265
Is this a white thing again?
On the list for Bannukah
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03-14-2018, 07:06 AM #5Humble Megalomaniac
- Join Date: Mar 2015
- Location: Nevada, United States
- Posts: 10,024
- Rep Power: 98130
Somebody is sitting on too much free time.
“Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.”
-Voltaire
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03-14-2018, 07:11 AM #6I'm a Swifty Now
- Join Date: Sep 2010
- Posts: 17,275
- Rep Power: 395007
Originally Posted by JediRN
Depends
Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999 - Cannabis Enthusiast since the 1960's
Retired at 40 Crew - Social distancing expert - Living the Dream
I use the gender neutral pronouns "Fukker/Fukkers" a lot.
****** I don't always agree with the memes I post ******
I tell it like it is, if you want smoke blown up your ass or something sugar coated. I suggest you get a Hooker and a powdered donut.
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03-14-2018, 08:00 AM #7I lift dead people.
- Join Date: Sep 2013
- Location: United States
- Posts: 8,387
- Rep Power: 43854
I don't think it's time I was sitting in.Originally Posted by ElrondHubbard
Naw, I'm 1.4% African.Originally Posted by bodyhard
Is this a white thing again?
so a dead lift spot is out of the questionOriginally Posted by Cantplankwell
We've all been there. The days of hiking the leg and cranking the arm as you squeeze out a wet colonic air burst are over.Originally Posted by Jtbny
You know you have gotten at least a little gun shy as the years have wore on.
The good news is that what we lack in dramatic presentation we more than make up for in olfactory destruction.A man who views the world the same at 50 as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.
Muhammad Ali
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03-14-2018, 08:15 AM #8I'm a Swifty Now
- Join Date: Sep 2010
- Posts: 17,275
- Rep Power: 395007
Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999 - Cannabis Enthusiast since the 1960's
Retired at 40 Crew - Social distancing expert - Living the Dream
I use the gender neutral pronouns "Fukker/Fukkers" a lot.
****** I don't always agree with the memes I post ******
I tell it like it is, if you want smoke blown up your ass or something sugar coated. I suggest you get a Hooker and a powdered donut.
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03-14-2018, 08:48 AM #9Registered User
- Join Date: Apr 2008
- Posts: 13,918
- Rep Power: 346434
Okay... here's my Ft Bragg poop story.
Monday and Friday morning was always company PT where we would go on a minimum of a 5 mile run. One particular Sunday, I had a few too many Schlitz.
It was a hot fall Monday morning. We were about 3 miles into the run when I felt a bubbling in my stomach. An evil bubbling. A bubbling that signified to me the early stages of mudd butt. I had to take a dump. I had to take a dump immediately.
My only options at that time was I could go doodoo in my running shorts, which I couldn't do since they were my only good pair at the time, or I could try to make it to the ROTC area and use one of the outdoor toilets... which was risky, but so was mudd butt.
I ran to the front of the formation and told the First Sergeant my plight and got the okay to high tail it to a toilet.
I was barely holding it together as I sprinted closer and closer to the outdoor toilets. But little did I realize, that the ROTC area is only used during the summer, and was locked up for the school year. I grabbed ahold of the toilet door and immediately panicked when it wouldn't open.
At this point, my only option was to drop trou and let it fly. About three feet up, right there on the toilet door. I quickly ripped my underpants off and used them for toilet paper, threw them down on the ground, pulled my good pair of running shorts back up, and re-joined the company formation.
I never spoke a word about this incident since I could be charged with desecration of a government facility with my feces. I had definitely left plenty of evidence at the scene of the crime.
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03-14-2018, 08:48 AM #10Registered User
- Join Date: Mar 2010
- Location: United States
- Posts: 13,225
- Rep Power: 131382
I didn't crap myself even when I had the worst seafood poisoning. Came close when I had to chit and throw up at the same time and had to prioritize. So I threw up on myself while sitting on the john. Good times.
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03-14-2018, 08:53 AM #11Registered User
- Join Date: Jun 2017
- Age: 41
- Posts: 7,237
- Rep Power: 86451
Bout 15 years ago during a bad bout with food poisoning. Thought I was over it enough to go to work but was wrong. Missed making it onto the toilet by about a half second do luckily the underwear just took the hit. Threw those away and went commando
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03-14-2018, 09:32 AM #12Nihilist
- Join Date: Mar 2008
- Age: 52
- Posts: 14,164
- Rep Power: 162746
Looks like you've completely skipped middle age and went straight to 80.Originally Posted by JediRN
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
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03-14-2018, 10:09 AM #13Registered User
- Join Date: Nov 2016
- Location: Ontario, Canada
- Age: 58
- Posts: 3,257
- Rep Power: 53795
Never, not even close. My posterior lower end is the strongest muscle in my body.
Please record my time/reps if I pass out
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03-14-2018, 10:37 AM #14Registered User
- Join Date: Feb 2009
- Location: Houston, Texas, United States
- Age: 45
- Posts: 794
- Rep Power: 3985
I've been in a similar situation, thankfully There was an empty trash can next to the toilet.Originally Posted by sy2502
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03-14-2018, 10:37 AM #15dad bod
- Join Date: Feb 2013
- Location: Virginia, United States
- Posts: 3,898
- Rep Power: 18162
I came back for this?
Just show up. Move some iron. Put in the time. Eat enough food.
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03-14-2018, 11:03 AM #16Registered User
- Join Date: Apr 2008
- Posts: 13,918
- Rep Power: 346434
People have been saying that O35 threads have gone to shyt lately. This is proof.Originally Posted by GKC45
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03-14-2018, 11:08 AM #17I'm a Swifty Now
- Join Date: Sep 2010
- Posts: 17,275
- Rep Power: 395007
We were on a week long ice fishing trip one time, one of the guys went in the bush at night to take a dump. I don't know if it was the beer or stupidity but he pulled his ski suit down, squatted and $hit in his hood and he didn't realize it till he was zipped back up.
Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999 - Cannabis Enthusiast since the 1960's
Retired at 40 Crew - Social distancing expert - Living the Dream
I use the gender neutral pronouns "Fukker/Fukkers" a lot.
****** I don't always agree with the memes I post ******
I tell it like it is, if you want smoke blown up your ass or something sugar coated. I suggest you get a Hooker and a powdered donut.
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03-14-2018, 11:17 AM #18Registered User
- Join Date: Mar 2010
- Location: United States
- Posts: 13,225
- Rep Power: 131382
Originally Posted by GKC45
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03-14-2018, 11:45 AM #19fat fukc
- Join Date: Jan 2013
- Location: United States
- Age: 58
- Posts: 23,483
- Rep Power: 262816
This is why I do low bar squats. When ya gotta go out in the woods ya want to get your hiney as far away as possible. Tell that boy to get back on his heels and use more hip drive...Originally Posted by mtpockets
Well meaning, elderly man with a poor memory...pause
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03-14-2018, 11:47 AM #20old woman
- Join Date: May 2014
- Location: United Kingdom (Great Britain)
- Posts: 7,249
- Rep Power: 55818
Honestly never but i piss myself deadlifting on the regular
retired from powerlifting, retired from the misc
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03-14-2018, 04:47 PM #21The Mini Shadow
- Join Date: Jun 2007
- Location: United States
- Posts: 38,488
- Rep Power: 459696
More of a regular misc thread.Originally Posted by Jtbny
OP if there's any doubt whatsoever, drop the kids off at the pool before entering the gym.Don't put that on me Ricky Bobby, don't you ever put that on me.
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03-14-2018, 05:22 PM #22dad bod
- Join Date: Feb 2013
- Location: Virginia, United States
- Posts: 3,898
- Rep Power: 18162
I can't decide if that's hot, or not.Originally Posted by melDorado
Just show up. Move some iron. Put in the time. Eat enough food.
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03-14-2018, 06:04 PM #23Banned
- Join Date: Jun 2011
- Location: Michigan, United States
- Age: 55
- Posts: 28,314
- Rep Power: 0
oh for crying out loud
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03-14-2018, 06:58 PM #24fat fukc
- Join Date: Jan 2013
- Location: United States
- Age: 58
- Posts: 23,483
- Rep Power: 262816
I always tinkle a little in the rack before going to get a drink. It's not from lifting but it sure works on holding your station...Originally Posted by melDorado
Well meaning, elderly man with a poor memory...pause
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03-14-2018, 07:48 PM #25
I don’t remember the last time. That may be good, or bad.
If you poke a bear in the eye, expect a bear like response.
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03-14-2018, 07:58 PM #26The Mini Shadow
- Join Date: Jun 2007
- Location: United States
- Posts: 38,488
- Rep Power: 459696
I got my 1st bloody nose on a squat a couple weeks ago, felt pretty alpha. I know DLB has had some unintended consequences of heavy singles as well.Originally Posted by GKC45
[youtube]you will have to look it up as it's censored here[/yotube]
Stuff happens, to me to put that in the category of "sexy" seems a little creepy/fetish. But each to their own of course.Don't put that on me Ricky Bobby, don't you ever put that on me.
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03-14-2018, 09:51 PM #27I lift dead people.
- Join Date: Sep 2013
- Location: United States
- Posts: 8,387
- Rep Power: 43854
Originally Posted by Cantplankwell
I can confirm I am a shyt poster.Originally Posted by Bo_Flecks
Some posters bring the lulz... I kinda just disappointOriginally Posted by GKC45
Practical to TacticalOriginally Posted by Fishman15
A man who views the world the same at 50 as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.
Muhammad Ali
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03-15-2018, 08:24 AM #28Registered User
- Join Date: Oct 2005
- Location: United States
- Posts: 46,617
- Rep Power: 419865
It was eons ago..... but I will say the dieters tea"smooth move" can be harsh and happen when you least expect it.
There is an unspoken thing, we are iron brothers and sisters, we are to support each other and...It is our duty to support our brothers and sisters in the iron game!
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03-15-2018, 08:54 AM #29Registered User
- Join Date: Mar 2010
- Location: United States
- Posts: 13,225
- Rep Power: 131382
Yep, have tinkled myself maxing out some lifts. I consider it a badge of honor.Originally Posted by melDorado
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03-15-2018, 10:35 AM #30Registered User
- Join Date: Dec 2006
- Location: South Carolina, United States
- Age: 44
- Posts: 18,170
- Rep Power: 160902
I'm doing it right now
ALL I ASK IS ALL YOU GOT FOR AS LONG AS IT TAKES
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