Just turned 31 today. After months of frightening symptoms from physical to behavioural, I've just got medical news that nobody wants to hear. I'm terminal. It's a cancerous growth in my brain. I have days left.
I'll never run 5K again. I'll never climb a mountain again. I'll never go to a brass band again. I'll never play music live again. I'll never work my wonderful job again. But I've done these things well. (Annoyingly, I'll never hit a 500lbs deadlift in the first place, and I got so close, and shaving my long 13 year old hair can no longer be an altruistic sacrifice for charity)
I will still have some chance to continue to talk to family and friends again. And these things will go well.
How you spend your days is how you spend your life. All of it. I'm okay with this now, butterflies at the bottom of my stomach notwithstanding. Maybe tomorrow, or the day after, I'll be completely freaked out, as sleepless nights in the past have been about the definitiveness of death, but closer. Not right now. I'm still in shock, but still feel - for the moment - prepared.
I've been very lucky that for maybe the last 2-3 years I've lived my life well (I've enjoyed the other years, but it would have been such a waste to go on them). And that really is enough. After all, I could very easily have never been born, like most potential people.
Seneca.It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it. Life is long enough, and a sufficiently generous amount has been given to us for the highest achievements if it were all well invested. But when it is wasted in heedless luxury and spent on no good activity, we are forced at last by death’s final constraint to realize that it has passed away before we knew it was passing. So it is: we are not given a short life but we make it short, and we are not ill-supplied but wasteful of it… Life is long if you know how to use it.
Love you misc brahs. Even the kunts. Live well.
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10-24-2017, 12:50 PM #1
Take your time seriously brahs, I won't see the New Year.
Interested in investing in militarizing poultry? Based in our Southernmost continent, no local taxes, no laws to worry about, guaranteed return! PM for further details
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10-24-2017, 12:51 PM #2
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10-24-2017, 12:56 PM #9
Stay strong OP wishing you the best my bro
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
*kormo is kool, I'm just mad cause he's stylin on me*
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10-24-2017, 12:57 PM #10
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10-24-2017, 12:57 PM #12
- Join Date: May 2012
- Location: Kansas City, Missouri, United States
- Age: 28
- Posts: 4,717
- Rep Power: 13859
Whatever happens happens Brah. God bless your soul wherever you go. Three years ago I lost my sister to cancer that ate her up from August/September 2014-December 16th 2017. She stilled kept her spirits high, and was ready for the inevitable, which trained me to learn how to let go as well. OP I’ll be praying for you, even if I don’t know you. One love
6'8 wingspan masterrace
6'0
221lbs
Loner cause I'm a weird fuk
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10-24-2017, 12:58 PM #13
- Join Date: Mar 2007
- Location: Florida, United States
- Age: 33
- Posts: 9,848
- Rep Power: 69591
If this is srs. I know no words can truly move you, but you seem to have life more figured out than most. GL Broski. All men die, not all men truly live.
I had a health scare few months ago. I thought I was in my final months, turns out I had "anxiety"? Still find it hard to believe, but apparently true. So cant imagine what your going through.
But on a positive note, I personally know a girl who has fought with brain tumors since high school, and as of last year I believe she is officially cancer free. Any fight worth fighting, is worth fighting till the end brah. Strength & Honor.Are you not entertained?
MFC #32
It's All About the U
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10-24-2017, 12:58 PM #14
I already have brahs. Thank you and I love you.
Personality changes, verbal difficulties, and everything else that could be mistaken for an ongoing flu + Shakes and nervous system problems.Interested in investing in militarizing poultry? Based in our Southernmost continent, no local taxes, no laws to worry about, guaranteed return! PM for further details
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