Losing social life due to nutrition. Alternative to cutting/bulking?

[Anonymous19900]

Hey,

I've been feeling a little down recently so I thought I would ask for some advice.

Since November, I have been going to the gym and been on a bulking cycle followed by a cutting cycle which I am currently half-way through. Every day I have been weighing my food religiously and sticking to my calories in order to make what I'm doing effective as possible.

I've seen myself turning down a lot of meals out with friends and family recently including a large family get together as I knew this would include food. A few people have recently told me that I need to start living more and also enjoy my food and not be so worried about having treats.

This has led me to think, is there an alternative to the cutting and bulking cycle? I want a plan where I follow calories but also have the flexibility to have days off and then make up for it on the following few days with a strict calorie deficit. Whilst doing my cutting/bulking cycles, I've been told (in person and on here) that if I have a treat day I should continue with my plan as if it never happened. However, like I said I'd like the freedom to have a few strict caloric deficit days to quickly undo the damage. Then I would get the best of best worlds where I can enjoy my social life whilst also not gaining on the pounds. (During cutting anyway). Is this possible or would this just ruin my composition?

Any advice is appreciated.

[Vandeman17]

When you say you are weighing your foods and all that, what is your reasoning or goal and are you just focusing on calories? If you are, read the stickies about striving to hit your macros each day from food you enjoy. Life is too short to miss out on social events, especislly because of food. Enjoy life, enjoy food and lift heavy

[Anonymous19900]

When you say you are weighing your foods and all that, what is your reasoning or goal and are you just focusing on calories? If you are, read the stickies about striving to hit your macros each day from food you enjoy. Life is too short to miss out on social events, especislly because of food. Enjoy life, enjoy food and lift heavy

My goal from November -> April was bulking. I tracked/weighed my food in order to hit protein, fat and a small calorie surplus.

My goal from May -> July is to lose excess fat brought on from the bulking phase. Again I track/weigh food in order to hit protein, fat and a small calorie deficit.

I just feel that I'm missing out on a lot of social activities because I didn't want to gain too much fat during bulking or gain weight whilst cutting.

[AdamWW]

precisely why i don't track or weigh things.

life is more important

[PeaceWithin]

Enjoy life, just don't go overboard. There's a point to be made about unwinding and destressing.

I maybe haven't done as well with the "don't go overboard part" Haha

[ErikTheElectric]

When is your competition OP?

If you're turning down social events due to not being able to eat food served, you could potential disordered eating patterns and body image issues.

[BuildKing]

OP are you trolling or what? Youve been weighting ur food for almost a year and are incapable of knowing aproximately how much calories the food that you eat out or with family is in order to incorporate that into your daily goal? I seriously dont know if you are being serious now.

[Mrpb]

I've seen myself turning down a lot of meals out with friends and family recently including a large family get together as I knew this would include food. A few people have recently told me that I need to start living more and also enjoy my food and not be so worried about having treats.

This might shock you but it is possible to eat with friends and family AND achieve your goals.

A couple of options: estimate the calories when you eat out or don't track the calories on some days, just eat to hunger.

And of course there's also the option of not tracking calories at all. Plenty of people have achieved good physiques by just lifting heavy and eating a lot of protein.

[SuffolkPunch]

I have a spreadsheet that has foods I commonly eat on it.

I spend about 1 minute specifying the quantities and the days calorie target. The spreadsheet tells me how many calories I have eaten and how many grams of protein - and what's left over.

Apart from having a protein shake on waking and another before bed time, you would not know that I follow a "bodybuilding diet".

[chamelious]

IMO, and my experience:

When bulking, i do track, but i just keep an eye on calories and keep them within an approx 2-300 range. I don't do this on a daily basis, i keep a weekly average and try to keep THAT within the 2-300 range. If it goes a bit over, i don't care. I never have to worry about it being under. In general i eat whatever i want, and i do a fair amount of guesswork if i eat out or something. I don't ever think about "macros".

When cutting, i track more accurately, and on the aggressive side of things. I keep a more daily eye on calories, and make sure i'm hitting P and F minimums. I usually still have one meal a week where i don't track, eating out or something.

These 2 things together mean i rarely experience the issues you describe, i spend much much more of my time bulking thank cutting, and my progress while not optimal, is certainly as close to optimal as can be, given the context of my life. (Aka, not a competitor of any kind)

[rsipock]

I've seen myself turning down a lot of meals out with friends and family recently including a large family get together as I knew this would include food. A few people have recently told me that I need to start living more and also enjoy my food and not be so worried about having treats.


Any advice is appreciated.

Why does "living more" entail eating processed foods? I always say, "no thank you" to family and friends who try to feed me foods that aren't conducive to my goals or alcohol. I only get one life and I live mine how I want. I still go to get-togethers but I either don't eat anything or bring my own food (boiled eggs are compact). To be honest, this situation doesn't come up all that often in my life. Usually there is some relatively clean protein and vegetables served. When that's the case, there's no issue. However, if they were serving pasta, I would have to pull out my eggs. So that's my advice: don't be rude, compromise when you can, but prioritize your goals. I know I am at variance with most people here on this topic, but since you solicited any advice I think my submission is germane.

[Anonymous19900]

Thanks for the replies guys.

I think you're all right and will relax more when it comes to social gatherings. I agree it can't be good psychologically to be persistently missing out and stressing about foods.

Estimating calories is easy but I would still be slightly concerned about not hitting my minimum fat and protein.

I suppose every now and again it doesn't really matter if these aren't hit?

I've also been recommended to look at intermittent fasting on days where I have a social event. Do you guys think this is a good suggestion?

Thanks again.

[chamelious]

[QUOTE=rsipock;1508489131] Usually there is some relatively clean protein and vegetables served. However, if they were serving pasta, I would have to pull out my eggs./QUOTE]

Good LORD.

[chamelious]

Thanks for the replies guys.

I think you're all right and will relax more when it comes to social gatherings. I agree it can't be good psychologically to be persistently missing out and stressing about foods.

Estimating calories is easy but I would still be slightly concerned about not hitting my minimum fat and protein.

I suppose every now and again it doesn't really matter if these aren't hit?

I've also been recommended to look at intermittent fasting on days where I have a social event. Do you guys think this is a good suggestion?

Thanks again.

If you're bulking its very very unlikely you'll miss minimums, and even if you do, these are minimums for "optimal" progress. You won't die. You definitely will not notice a dint in your progress for a day, or two, or seven. These things make such small differences.

If i know i'm going to be having an unusually large amount of calories in the evening, i try to consume less calories through the day. IF is taking that to the completely unnecessary extreme.

[BuildKing]

Thanks for the replies guys.

I think you're all right and will relax more when it comes to social gatherings. I agree it can't be good psychologically to be persistently missing out and stressing about foods.

Estimating calories is easy but I would still be slightly concerned about not hitting my minimum fat and protein.

I suppose every now and again it doesn't really matter if these aren't hit?

I've also been recommended to look at intermittent fasting on days where I have a social event. Do you guys think this is a good suggestion?

Thanks again.

What do you think will happen if you hit 150g of protein instead of that 165g of protein that YOU YOURSELF decided to have as a goal? Your talking minimum protein like its actually the minimum you should get, good lord.... its OPTIMUM protein intake what you are talking about, do you know how minimum the minimum protein requirement actually is? And no it doesn't matter if you don't hit ur protein 1 day, or your fat 1 day, or even 2 days, or 3 days, those are just optimum levels, even with lower ones u will still progress.. you would have to be eating at extremely low levels for a while to start getting negative effects.

And what do you think will happen if you cut and have a 500 calorie deficit every day, which ends up being 3500 in a week, with 7 days, and then one day you go out and eat a meal outside, a normal meal with potato, meat, vegetables... and you eyeball the plate and conclude you ate around 700 calories worth in that meal, then you type it in your fitness calculator or whatever and proceed to eat your 500 deficit goal that day? Do you think ur gonna lose all your progress or something? You do realize that by eyeballing that plate, even if you have an ounce of clue, you won't really miss by that much... maybe its gonna be in the ballpark of 400-1000 calories, and you estimated 700... even if its in the upper part you still are in a 200 calorie deficit... heck you would have to eat more than 3500 calories more than you estimated to start making ur whole weeks progress worth nothing, do you realize the amount of food it would take for you to make a mistake that huge? By estimating and missing by 3500 calories... thats ridicilous.

[KrisMM83]

[QUOTE=chamelious;1508489651]

Usually there is some relatively clean protein and vegetables served. However, if they were serving pasta, I would have to pull out my eggs./QUOTE]

Good LORD.

Actually laughed out loud.

[Jammer02xd]

I have a spreadsheet that has foods I commonly eat on it.

I spend about 1 minute specifying the quantities and the days calorie target. The spreadsheet tells me how many calories I have eaten and how many grams of protein - and what's left over.

Apart from having a protein shake on waking and another before bed time, you would not know that I follow a "bodybuilding diet".

Yeah this. If I didn't tell people I was trying to lose weight, they'd never know because all they see is that I'm eating a whole bunch of chicken, greens and some butternut squash. In reality, I planned my meals out on Sunday so I just don't have to think about it. Even if I go out, I can always find something on a menu ANYWHERE that I can fit into my calories (while cutting nonetheless). It's just about having a plan and knowing where you stand.

[Oatmealman99]

Lifting weights is something that should approve your quality of life, not detract from it. Stop worrying so much about the tiny details and focus on the bigger picture.

[desslok]

I have traveled the world and shockingly, everywhere I go has food that contains protein, fat, and carbs. I have found that the more I eat, the more weight I gain, and the less I eat, i lose weight. I have used these groundbreaking discoveries to control my weight within a few pounds for the past couple decades. For example, if i am traveling to Paris, i will load up on delicious foods and the best pastries in the world hands down, and great coffee drinks. If at the end of the week i see myself gaining more fat than I like(i can tell by looming in the mirror) i simply eat less the next week, etc.

Unless you are in contest prep mode and your contest is within 9 weeks or so.

[Mikeez0]

"When bodybuilding consumes you life, it will lose its appeal and you will not get optimal results."

Life is about balance. As a great man once said, "Once in a while, you just gotta get krunk."