Female Miscers With Kids (GTFIH) (HALP)

[sweetneybrian]

What's up ladies, I'm in desperate need of help. Figured it'd be more effective to ask here rather than the misc.

Anyways, here's my issue, I have a 6 week old who just won't sleep through the night. Never had this issue before so I don't know what to do. He'll sleep all day long no problem, me and the gf have recently started keeping him up more to help get him to sleep more at night but it hasn't seemed to work. If we lay him on either of our chests he'll go to sleep but as soon as he hits his crib he pops right back up and starts crying. We tried his swing, bassinet and its the same results he wakes up right away at the most we may be able to get 30 minutes of sleep out of him.

Any tips you mothers in here may be able to help me out with.

TL;DR

-Infant won't sleep through the night
-Tried everything
-Need tips
-Thanks

[Succeeded]

put the crib in your room, or let him sleep on your chest till he knocks out and gently put him the the crib (if you didn't do that already) i would say let him sleep with you guys but its way too risky, lost a little cousin that way.

[sweetneybrian]

put the crib in your room, or let him sleep on your chest till he knocks out and gently put him the the crib (if you didn't do that already) i would say let him sleep with you guys but its way too risky, lost a little cousin that way.

Cribs about a foot from our bed, and yea that's what we do constantly, lay him on chest pat on the back until he's out. The problem is getting him to stay asleep once he's there.

[megdaig]

Breastfed or formula? If breast it's likely because he's hungry.

To be honest. I didn't sleep train mine until about 6 months. Took 3 nights of crying it out and then he got the memo. He does the exact same if he wakes at night, immediately back to sleep on our chest. We wait until he's really out before putting him back down. After three attempts of doing that we just let him cry it out.

I found propping the crib mattress up a bit on one end helped him breath better and therefore sleep better. Maybe run a humidifier to help with breathing and congestion.

[spradish]

Six week olds generally do not sleep through the night, meaning 8 hours. You might get one 5 hour spot and then a couple of shorter sleeps between feedings.

A really good book about infant/baby sleep is Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. It is the absolutely only parenting book I've ever read and it's such a good reference book. His mantra that sleep begets sleep was so spot on for my daughter. With her, I pretty much didn't try any special sleep training/scheduling until around 10 weeks. Up until that point, she napped when she napped during the day and, in general, she'd fall asleep around 6 or 7pm, wake around 10 or 11 and feed, and then sleep for one 5 hour block and a couple of 2 hour blocks. That was on good nights. (Keep in mind that babies are experts at changing things up once you think you've figured them out. They are wily little creatures.)

Also, babies tend to have growth spurts at approximately 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 3 months, and 6 months, which can really upset their sleep schedules and make them want to eat more often. If this is brand new behavior, your baby might be going through that. When my daughter was 6 weeks I had two days of practically nonstop nursing. It was exhausting. Then, suddenly, she was all chipper and back to her normal self.

[sweetneybrian]

Breastfed or formula? If breast it's likely because he's hungry.

To be honest. I didn't sleep train mine until about 6 months. Took 3 nights of crying it out and then he got the memo. He does the exact same if he wakes at night, immediately back to sleep on our chest. We wait until he's really out before putting him back down. After three attempts of doing that we just let him cry it out.

I found propping the crib mattress up a bit on one end helped him breath better and therefore sleep better. Maybe run a humidifier to help with breathing and congestion.

We run a humidifier occasionally.

At which end do you prop up the crib? Then he sleeps on or the opposite end?

Six week olds generally do not sleep through the night, meaning 8 hours. You might get one 5 hour spot and then a couple of shorter sleeps between feedings.

A really good book about infant/baby sleep is Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. It is the absolutely only parenting book I've ever read and it's such a good reference book. His mantra that sleep begets sleep was so spot on for my daughter. With her, I pretty much didn't try any special sleep training/scheduling until around 10 weeks. Up until that point, she napped when she napped during the day and, in general, she'd fall asleep around 6 or 7pm, wake around 10 or 11 and feed, and then sleep for one 5 hour block and a couple of 2 hour blocks. That was on good nights. (Keep in mind that babies are experts at changing things up once you think you've figured them out. They are wily little creatures.)

Also, babies tend to have growth spurts at approximately 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 3 months, and 6 months, which can really upset their sleep schedules and make them want to eat more often. If this is brand new behavior, your baby might be going through that. When my daughter was 6 weeks I had two days of practically nonstop nursing. It was exhausting. Then, suddenly, she was all chipper and back to her normal self.

Thanks for the help, we're no looking for a full night of sleep but just a few hours, right now we're lucky if we can manage to get a full hour. It's been brutal.

Will take a look at the book you recommeneded.

[kimm4]

Don't fall into the trap of letting them sleep with you or on your chest. They will continue doing it and it's a very hard habit to break. As long as they've been fed and they've been changed you need to let them cry in their crib.

[sweetneybrian]

Don't fall into the trap of letting them sleep with you or on your chest. They will continue doing it and it's a very hard habit to break. As long as they've been fed and they've been changed you need to let them cry in their crib.

That's how I've been going about things so far but the lady likes to come to his rescue instead of letting him cry.

[megdaig]

Head up at the end that is propped up...almost like a recliner.

[sweetneybrian]

Head up at the end that is propped up...almost like a recliner.

Cool thanks

[mcbourque]

There are a lot of philosophies about crying babies at night. Some sleep train them, some don't.

I have no judgement towards those who sleep train, but that was not something that was acceptable to us and we did the whole attachment parenting thing with both my sons in our bed, breastfeed on demand, child-led weaning and all that. Both kids had very different temperaments, my first would not have slept at all without being with us.

Taking babies to bed was the easiest thing for us in order to get some sleep. It was almost a non-issue.

It's really a personal choice. My heart (and my husband's) could not just let our boys cry alone at night. They are both now very independent teenagers and have been since they were toddlers. (i.e. picking them up when they cry will NOT make them mommy's boys - in fact research says the opposite).

All I can say is ask around for advice, read what you can on both sides and make the decision that is best for yourself and your wife.

If you want to know more about attachment parenting and how it is ok to respond to your crying baby at night, read books by Dr. Sears.

[megdaig]

Just use your judgement when it comes to letting them cry it out. At 6 weeks old a baby's stomach is about 4 oz so more frequent feedings are needed. If you know that all their basic needs are met, temperature, diaper clean, belly full, then let them be.

I know when I was a baby, the littlest of things irritated me and I wouldn't sleep. My mom discovered that I didn't like the tags on my clothing and also too many layers (too warm).

[sweetneybrian]

Thanks everybody, all your advice will be taken. I'll try and see what works out best.

[savmom22]

I wrote you an entire post and my computer ate it. Dammit.

Anyway, I don't do cry-it-out until 6 months or so, so here is what worked for my girls:

Daughter #1 = Rock N Play next to the bed. It has an incline and you can rock it back and forth. I believe they even have auto-rocking ones now. I have seen some things that say don't let them sleep in the RnP now though - there were no recommendations for or against them 4+ years ago so we did it.

Daughter #2 = bedsharing, like the mcbourque mentioned. I did some research on how to do it safely (breastfeeding, no heavy blankets or pillows, my husband slept in a different bed b/c he is overweight.) It's not for everyone so you have to choose what is right for your family, but both myself and the baby got SO much more sleep this way. People were baffled at how I had so much energy to still workout and didn't look exhausted all the time even though I had a newborn and a toddler. At 6 months I transitioned her to a Pack N Play in our room and eventually did CIO to get her to sleep in her own crib in her own room. She now sleeps 12+ hours a night and has been since about 6 months.

Good luck! The newborn/no-sleeping phase will pass!

[Hannah82]

Maybe he could be sleeping too much during the day, or he is fighting sleep. There is also a way to analyze the sound of his cry, can probably do some Google research to figure out the meaning/needs. I remember my kids having different sounding cries for certain needs. You could try the all natural colic or gas drops you can find at any WalMart or Walgreens. They work well if that is the issue.

[sweetneybrian]

Maybe he could be sleeping too much during the day, or he is fighting sleep. There is also a way to analyze the sound of his cry, can probably do some Google research to figure out the meaning/needs. I remember my kids having different sounding cries for certain needs. You could try the all natural colic or gas drops you can find at any WalMart or Walgreens. They work well if that is the issue.

We do our best to keep him up as much as possible during the day. We don't really let him sleep until he's beyond grouchy and going crazy. We've been doing the gas drops for a while, he started out with really bad gas and we do the bicycle move to push his gas out for him to. Will look into this cry analyzing, never heard of it before.

[megdaig]

We do our best to keep him up as much as possible during the day. We don't really let him sleep until he's beyond grouchy and going crazy. We've been doing the gas drops for a while, he started out with really bad gas and we do the bicycle move to push his gas out for him to. Will look into this cry analyzing, never heard of it before.

Definitely learned a lot from this one with Priscilla Dunstan

And realize that a beyond exhausted baby may not necessarily work in your favor. I think we all know how it feels to be so tired and trying your hardest to keep your eyes open, or read that one last page to finish the chapter in the book but you keep dozing off....it just hurts. New babies need like 16 hours of sleep so it's not necessarily bad for them to sleep most of the day. They could be getting so exhausted during the day that it's interfering with their nighttime sleep.

[mcbourque]

You know, if all fails, you can always buckle him up in the car and you and your wife go for a quiet drive. Then just take the car seat in the house and gently into his bed.

That saved us quite a few times with our first kid!

[RuleFive]

Do you swaddle him? I got these things called woombies for my second and third babies. They really liked to be tightly swaddled, and with the woombie, I didn't have to worry about a blanket coming unwrapped and winding up over their faces. Also, it can really help if you can try to put him down when he's drowsy but not asleep and just pat his back. If you keep at it for a few days, it will help him learn to fall asleep on his own. This helps a lot when he wakes up a little at night, if he's not hungry, he can go back to sleep on his own.

After all that, it does just take a while for them to sleep better. Growth spurts will definitely have them up more often at night. It doesn't feel like it now, but this phase will just be a memory before you know it.

Hope you can at least get some 2 or 3 hour chunks of sleep soon!

[sweetneybrian]

You know, if all fails, you can always buckle him up in the car and you and your wife go for a quiet drive. Then just take the car seat in the house and gently into his bed.

That saved us quite a few times with our first kid!

Lol, we've considered this a few times but we've been holding back. Don't want that to have to be our night time routine just to get him to sleep.

Do you swaddle him? I got these things called woombies for my second and third babies. They really liked to be tightly swaddled, and with the woombie, I didn't have to worry about a blanket coming unwrapped and winding up over their faces. Also, it can really help if you can try to put him down when he's drowsy but not asleep and just pat his back. If you keep at it for a few days, it will help him learn to fall asleep on his own. This helps a lot when he wakes up a little at night, if he's not hungry, he can go back to sleep on his own.

After all that, it does just take a while for them to sleep better. Growth spurts will definitely have them up more often at night. It doesn't feel like it now, but this phase will just be a memory before you know it.

Hope you can at least get some 2 or 3 hour chunks of sleep soon!

Yea we swaddle him most of the time, we tried this super swaddle thing to that we came across on youtube.Before we just did a simple swaddle but now we make sure its really snug on him, it helps get him to sleep but still doesn't keep him asleep.

[Amanda76]

Have you tried running a fan or some other white noise? Maybe there are little bumps in the night (even things like y'all changing positions in bed) that disrupt his sleep.

[MissHolly]

Wow, you've gotten a lot of great advice here already. So I'll just add my anecdotal experiences, whether you want to hear it or not.

With my son I was much like your girlfriend in that I couldn't help but pick him up when he cried. He napped on my chest or in my arms most days. And so many nights I spent walking him around to get him to sleep. After doing some research, I found that he should be fed more during the day to help keep him from waking at night. Then I found out about sleep training and started that around 6 months. It was tough to hear him cry and to not dart into his room at first. But eventually, after lots of tears from both baby and mommy, everyone was sleeping through the night.

Now with my daughter, I did things much differently. And I don't think it was purposeful, really. When she came along, she didn't nap on me. I had her nap in her crib or her swing. My son by this time was finally on a nap schedule so this helped me be more diligent about her getting on somewhat of a schedule, too. Of course when babies are brand new, you're on their schedule, but eventually things do fall into a pattern. I learned with my son that having a nighttime routine before bed helped signal that, "this is bedtime" to the baby. So we would do a bath, put on comfy pj's and have the last bottle for the night. Then I would place her in her crib still awake, but she'd be a little drowsy. It was so hard at first, but I left the room and she did fine. I honestly don't know if she was just different from the get-go, or if the no-napping on mommy had anything to do with it.

Now all of this easier time I had with my daughter came a little bit after a colicky stage we went through. She would cry nonstop in the evenings sometimes. Then I was on walking duty, but it didn't last forever, thankfully. It was after she was sleeping better and we moved her to her own room that things got easier.

Have you thought maybe your son could have acid reflux? When you lay him down is when he gets upset. Have you tried Meg's suggestion about propping the mattress? Doing that would relieve any acid pain, if he is experiencing that. How are things since your first post? Any better?

Agree with tight swaddling and white noise as well.

[sweetneybrian]

Have you tried running a fan or some other white noise? Maybe there are little bumps in the night (even things like y'all changing positions in bed) that disrupt his sleep.

Tried the fan that didn't work, we used white noise but it would only work for small periods of time.

Wow, you've gotten a lot of great advice here already. So I'll just add my anecdotal experiences, whether you want to hear it or not.

With my son I was much like your girlfriend in that I couldn't help but pick him up when he cried. He napped on my chest or in my arms most days. And so many nights I spent walking him around to get him to sleep. After doing some research, I found that he should be fed more during the day to help keep him from waking at night. Then I found out about sleep training and started that around 6 months. It was tough to hear him cry and to not dart into his room at first. But eventually, after lots of tears from both baby and mommy, everyone was sleeping through the night.

Now with my daughter, I did things much differently. And I don't think it was purposeful, really. When she came along, she didn't nap on me. I had her nap in her crib or her swing. My son by this time was finally on a nap schedule so this helped me be more diligent about her getting on somewhat of a schedule, too. Of course when babies are brand new, you're on their schedule, but eventually things do fall into a pattern. I learned with my son that having a nighttime routine before bed helped signal that, "this is bedtime" to the baby. So we would do a bath, put on comfy pj's and have the last bottle for the night. Then I would place her in her crib still awake, but she'd be a little drowsy. It was so hard at first, but I left the room and she did fine. I honestly don't know if she was just different from the get-go, or if the no-napping on mommy had anything to do with it.

Now all of this easier time I had with my daughter came a little bit after a colicky stage we went through. She would cry nonstop in the evenings sometimes. Then I was on walking duty, but it didn't last forever, thankfully. It was after she was sleeping better and we moved her to her own room that things got easier.

Have you thought maybe your son could have acid reflux? When you lay him down is when he gets upset. Have you tried Meg's suggestion about propping the mattress? Doing that would relieve any acid pain, if he is experiencing that. How are things since your first post? Any better?

Agree with tight swaddling and white noise as well.

Most of your post matches what's going on with my son now. During the day he seems to be eating a lot more, idk if its directly related but he has gotten somewhat better at night.

Didn't exactly do what Meg said but we now let him sleep in this sleeper chair that he has, don't know the exact name, its angled so his head is a bit higher and he's been getting much better.

He seems to get super restless and grouchy before he'll actually decide to go to bed but last night I think was our best night yet. Finally got him to bed around 9:30 and he didn't wake up until somewhere between 12:30 and 1am.

@Amanda repped
@Holly reps on spread lol

[MissHolly]

Most of your post matches what's going on with my son now. During the day he seems to be eating a lot more, idk if its directly related but he has gotten somewhat better at night.

Didn't exactly do what Meg said but we now let him sleep in this sleeper chair that he has, don't know the exact name, its angled so his head is a bit higher and he's been getting much better.

He seems to get super restless and grouchy before he'll actually decide to go to bed but last night I think was our best night yet. Finally got him to bed around 9:30 and he didn't wake up until somewhere between 12:30 and 1am.

@Amanda repped
@Holly reps on spread lol

That sounds encouraging! Yes, the elevated sleeping can help greatly. Glad you found something that helped.

[Amanda76]

Didn't exactly do what Meg said but we now let him sleep in this sleeper chair that he has, don't know the exact name, its angled so his head is a bit higher and he's been getting much better.

He seems to get super restless and grouchy before he'll actually decide to go to bed but last night I think was our best night yet. Finally got him to bed around 9:30 and he didn't wake up until somewhere between 12:30 and 1am.

Glad you've found something that seems to be working!