I'm not the same anymore

[WarWithWeakness]

I want to train, but I'm not a kid anymore.

Didn't think this would happen. I didn't think I'd change as I grew up; I was a lifer. Put in a good 8 years of training. Bulked up from a skinny-**** to 84kg at 5'7", was lean as phuck for a while. Still not far off, but not for a lack of trying with bad diet and alcohol. Mostly the issue is that my diet is alcohol.

"If you're really happy with your strength, and don't feel like you'd benefit in any way from getting stronger, then stop listening now" was the general advice back then, and is loosely paraphrased from one video or another.

Truthfully?

I'm a career professional now, I work, I party, and sleep with lots of random women. Could I sleep with prettier women if I were more ripped? Maybe, but that's a big maybe. That's not how it works; besides, average chicks **** better.

I have what I want. Anything more there is to gain, comes from reading, studying, and putting in years of hard work and paying dues in career and life in general. Time with weights will only make me better with weights.
As for women, honestly, I probably need to learn to listen, rather than build them guns.

I just... honestly, I party too hard. I work too hard. I live on occasional take away food, and that's if I eat at all. I work 90+ hours per week, then go and do tequila shots with a blurr of people (who's names, I really don't know) and wash it down with veritable swimming pools of beer. I sleep three hours and start again. This is my life, and it's the only way for me to live right now; and I feel alive in it, but I don't like the knowledge that my body will decay under the burdens I'm putting on it.

I don't want to change any of it. But I really should.

I need to clean things up; I still want to have fun though, and I am who I am, I just want to be killing it in the gym as well as doing all the rest.


But that requires commitment and focus, neither of which I have for training right now. That's why I'm asking you guys to kick me into action, tell me I'm an idiot, and tell me why.

[LAclutch239]

I want to train, but I'm not a kid anymore.

Didn't think this would happen. I didn't think I'd change as I grew up; I was a lifer. Put in a good 8 years of training. Bulked up from a skinny-**** to 84kg at 5'7", was lean as phuck for a while. Still not far off, but not for a lack of trying with bad diet and alcohol. Mostly the issue is that my diet is alcohol.

"If you're really happy with your strength, and don't feel like you'd benefit in any way from getting stronger, then stop listening now" was the general advice back then, and is loosely paraphrased from one video or another.

Truthfully?

I'm a career professional now, I work, I party, and sleep with lots of random women. Could I sleep with prettier women if I were more ripped? Maybe, but that's a big maybe. That's not how it works; besides, average chicks **** better.

I have what I want. Anything more there is to gain, comes from reading, studying, and putting in years of hard work and paying dues in career and life in general. Time with weights will only make me better with weights.
As for women, honestly, I probably need to learn to listen, rather than build them guns.

I just... honestly, I party too hard. I work too hard. I live on occasional take away food, and that's if I eat at all. I work 90+ hours per week, then go and do tequila shots with a blurr of people (who's names, I really don't know) and wash it down with veritable swimming pools of beer. I sleep three hours and start again. This is my life, and it's the only way for me to live right now; and I feel alive in it, but I don't like the knowledge that my body will decay under the burdens I'm putting on it.

I don't want to change any of it. But I really should.

I need to clean things up; I still want to have fun though, and I am who I am, I just want to be killing it in the gym as well as doing all the rest.


But that requires commitment and focus, neither of which I have for training right now. That's why I'm asking you guys to kick me into action, tell me I'm an idiot, and tell me why.

Just re-read what you wrote OP. That should do the trick.

[james90210]

I feel 'ya OP! I was going through the same internal debate with myself just a month or two ago. Since I've stopped going out so much with people that don't care about me or give a ****, i honestly feel more relaxed and separate from the BS. You just hve got to want to change! It doesn't happen quickly, for me it was a slow change over many months. I will say I'm more at peace with myself since I cut the partying mostly out (don't think I could ever cut it completely out lol)