He had asked me out on 3 dates, is it OK for me to initiate date 4?

[an3190]

So been talking to this hot guy for about 3 weeks now, went on 3 dates, every single date was amazing, date 3 went hiking and cliff jumping, spent the whole day together, was so much fun. He's been initiating contact everyday, also hinted at future plans, etc. He was the one asking me out on those dates, so my question is if it's ok for me to start initiating and ask him out the next time. However, I don't want him to get used to the idea of me asking. Plus, I think if I leave the asking to him, I would know for sure that he's for real interested. Thoughts?

[Zerotohero1]

do it ****ot

[foreveravirgin]

Have you even had sex yet? He's a beta cuck if he hasn't made a move yet.

[an3190]

Lol, no we haven't had sex yet. I really like this guy and I want to take it slow with him.

[FriendOfFrank]

Lol, no we haven't had sex yet. I really like this guy and I want to take it slow with him.

Is that a stripper pole in your avi?

[an3190]

Yes it is indeed. Was at a bachelorette party. But how does that have anything to do with my question?

[NotBigEnough206]

are you retarted or 12 years old

of course ask him, text, call say hey, what are you doing, when are we hanging out again

its simple

[FriendOfFrank]

Just avin a giggle m8

If you have something fun in mind, I don't see the problem in asking him to join you. I wouldn't ask him to take you to dinner and pay for you or anything like that.

[jeffl1980]

Have you even had sex yet? He's a beta cuck if he hasn't made a move yet.

It's going on 4 dates. Not for months.

But of course you have no experience getting past the first date so.......STFU already.

[HoustonMiscer]

Tell him to go NC

[Kev1972]

3 dates and no sex from an absolute sloore? If I were him I'd already be in the Chapel Hill area.

[Comboking]

Lol, no we haven't had sex yet. I really like this guy and I want to take it slow with him.

He will get bored of you if you do not put out. Unless he is the desperate/clingy type
has he even attempted to make a move on you

also yet initiate the next hangout, alot of women are shallow and will likely never initiate a hangout themselves

[an3190]

He will get bored of you if you do not put out. Unless he is the desperate/clingy type
has he even attempted to make a move on you

also yet initiate the next hangout, alot of women are shallow and will likely never initiate a hangout themselves

If he does indeed get bored only because I don't put out then so be it. I wouldn't wanna date someone who just wanna get in my pants anyhow. Next!

[an3190]

3 dates and no sex from an absolute sloore? If I were him I'd already be in the Chapel Hill area.

thank God you are not him! LMAO

[an3190]

It's going on 4 dates. Not for months.

But of course you have no experience getting past the first date so.......STFU already.

Thank you!

[TheJizzler]

Lol, no we haven't had sex yet. I really like this guy and I want to take it slow with him.

Smart...

[Solomonlike]

Can anyone confirm if this is a troll (real female) or not?

[jeffl1980]

Thank you!

The twits on here makes absolutely no sense. They complain about how all women are sloots but yet they can't comprehend why a female wont put out after the 2nd date.

[TheJizzler]

The twits on here makes absolutely no sense. They complain about how all women are sloots but yet they can't comprehend why a female wont put out after the 2nd date.

My dig is more to do with the fact that anyone who puts a timeframe on sex is usually full of chit. It happens when it happens

In my experience, whenever a girl feels the need to state 'I want to take things slow' it means that she normally puts out really early, but feels the need to pull some over-the-top choir-girl act around relationship guys. Then she'll tense up, throw off all the chemistry they've got going and overthink every interaction to the point where she's too nervous to text a guy that she's already been on several dates with...


^Fkn games





To answer your question OP: yeah, text him. Plan some fun stuff. Steer your own life. Stay away from that 'gauging interest' chit and just put your real self in front of him. Maybe he'll like it. Worst case, you get rejected and your feelings get bruised... they'll heal. All part of adult life. And by 25 you should be smart enough to tell who is and who isn't just trying to bang you pretty early on

[jeffl1980]

My dig is more to do with the fact that anyone who puts a timeframe on sex is usually full of chit. It happens when it happens

In my experience, whenever a girl feels the need to state 'I want to take things slow' it means that she normally puts out really early, but feels the need to pull some over-the-top choir-girl act around relationship guys. Then she'll tense up, throw off all the chemistry they've got going and overthink every interaction to the point where she's too nervous to text a guy that she's already been on several dates with...


^Fkn games

I can agree with this ^^^^^

Having said that though, the guys who b*tch and complain about women who doesn't automatically put out after a couple dates are complete morons. A couple $30 meals shouldnt equate to automatically getting into a chicks paints.

[IawI]

Lol hard @ making him wait when you know damn well you've given it up within hours of meeting other dudes. Do the dude a favor and cut him off. He doesn't need a dumb sloot like you in his life playing your stupid sloot games.

[IawI]

My dig is more to do with the fact that anyone who puts a timeframe on sex is usually full of chit. It happens when it happens

In my experience, whenever a girl feels the need to state 'I want to take things slow' it means that she normally puts out really early, but feels the need to pull some over-the-top choir-girl act around relationship guys. Then she'll tense up, throw off all the chemistry they've got going and overthink every interaction to the point where she's too nervous to text a guy that she's already been on several dates with...


^Fkn games





To answer your question OP: yeah, text him. Plan some fun stuff. Steer your own life. Stay away from that 'gauging interest' chit and just put your real self in front of him. Maybe he'll like it. Worst case, you get rejected and your feelings get bruised... they'll heal. All part of adult life. And by 25 you should be smart enough to tell who is and who isn't just trying to bang you pretty early on

This. She stated that she wants to "take it slow". That means it's not something she normally does, or else she wouldn't have said that. She would have said something like "I don't sleep with guys until I get to know them". So when a girl tells me she wants to "take it slow", it makes me feel like a chump because some dude out there made her panties drop instantly, yet I have to wait? Nah, f*ck that sh*t. Play that game with someone dumb enough to fall for it.

[MrBungle11]

If you dont show some interest back then he'll think you dont like him and he'll lose interest. If you want to see him again, then ask. It really is that simple.

[IawI]

But to answer your stupid question, yes you should ask him on a date. It would validate to him that you are interested in him, which you haven't done because you refuse to put out.

But to me, it sounds like you're already playing power games, and you really should let this dude find a sane chick while you try to position yourself a little lower on the crazy scale.

[Solomonlike]

My dig is more to do with the fact that anyone who puts a timeframe on sex is usually full of chit. It happens when it happens

In my experience, whenever a girl feels the need to state 'I want to take things slow' it means that she normally puts out really early, but feels the need to pull some over-the-top choir-girl act around relationship guys. Then she'll tense up, throw off all the chemistry they've got going and overthink every interaction to the point where she's too nervous to text a guy that she's already been on several dates with...


^Fkn games

Lol hard @ making him wait when you know damn well you've given it up within hours of meeting other dudes. Do the dude a favor and cut him off. He doesn't need a dumb sloot like you in his life playing your stupid sloot games.

Spot on. I know the type. Passed the possy out like candy before now all of a sudden they want to take things slow. If you're a guy that's ok with being "that guy" who she does that to, then kudos to you. I'm NOT ok with it.

Waiting just to wait? LOL. Different strokes for different folks.

[tS0UL]

OP you said that to make sure he likes you you should wait for him to ask. He's already asked you 3 times, that clearly shows interest, perhaps you should show the same interest to him by asking for the 4th date.

[ratbatkicker]

Wow.. If this broad isn't a troll dude in disguise.. You guys are harsh lmfao

[Benihanas]

Little bit of a catch 22 going on ITT...if a girl puts out early more than likely a guy will lower his impression of her and not consider her dateable...but if she happens to want to change her ways/happens to grow up/happens to want to start looking for something more than just casual sex, it's "lol @ making him wait just to wait"

there's a psychology behind initial attractions, and it goes both ways. nothing wrong with wanting to take it slow.



What I have a bigger problem with personally is that OP is essentially already creating a power dynamic and a system of head games. "I don't want him to get used to the idea of me asking"...is a huge red flag IMO.

Why the fuk not? It sounds like you're paranoid about maintaining control and maintaining your "grip" on him and on the relationship. It seems like you don't want a real relationship with someone based on comfort, trust, and intimacy, but rather you want some guy who has to constantly entertain you, constantly appeal to you, etc. etc. Seems like you want all take and no give.

IMO when you find someone you want to date, you should feel comfortable enough just being yourself and being open and honest. It's the only way you're going to be able to display your true self and true behavior to see if they can agree with it, and the only way you're going to be able to see their true self and true behavior to know if YOU can agree with it. This power dynamic bullchit of "he should text me first" or all the myriad ways in which you women try to get psychological with us does nothing more than fuk up whatever good thing is going

[TheJizzler]

I can agree with this ^^^^^

Having said that though, the guys who b*tch and complain about women who doesn't automatically put out after a couple dates are complete morons. A couple $30 meals shouldnt equate to automatically getting into a chicks paints.

I think a lot of miscers are so bad with social nuances that every interaction has to fit a gameplan. Expecting them to grasp concepts like chemistry and rapport is just too much

This. She stated that she wants to "take it slow". That means it's not something she normally does, or else she wouldn't have said that. She would have said something like "I don't sleep with guys until I get to know them". So when a girl tells me she wants to "take it slow", it makes me feel like a chump because some dude out there made her panties drop instantly, yet I have to wait? Nah, f*ck that sh*t. Play that game with someone dumb enough to fall for it.

Thinking about it, those types of girls always have to be in control. Meet a guy, chemistry's there, attraction's there, circumstances are right, really wants to phuck him... 'lolz, I'll make him wait because I don't want to risk getting hurt and I don't know of any other way to keep him around'

It's such a high-school thought process


Edit: wizard above beat me to the control point

[IawI]

Little bit of a catch 22 going on ITT...if a girl puts out early more than likely a guy will lower his impression of her and not consider her dateable...but if she happens to want to change her ways/happens to grow up/happens to want to start looking for something more than just casual sex, it's "lol @ making him wait just to wait"

there's a psychology behind initial attractions, and it goes both ways. nothing wrong with wanting to take it slow.

You're right, but the point is she's not being consistent. If a girl isn't comfortable with sleeping with a guy until she gets to know him, then by all means there's nothing wrong with waiting. The point here is that by her saying she wants to "take it slow", it implies that she doesn't normally do that, and like you pointed out, she's already started playing games.