Misc, tell me if my gf is wrong

[mstr2]

We've been dating 8 months, but we're pretty serious. She rents a room with a couple who I'm friends with in their condo. Yesterday she told me her guy friend 'Brandon' who is "like a brother to her" was going to come visit her (she moved here from another state). She then told me that she was going to let him stay at her place and sleep on the couch while he's in town. Naturally, I was furious, and a huge argument followed. She feels that there should be no issue because she doesn't live alone. She assures me she's known him 4 years and he's such a good friend and would never hit on her etc etc. I say, fwark that because he's still a guy and it's inappropriate and disrespectful to me to have him sleep over, even if he is in the other room on the couch and even if he is just a friend. I'm not worried about her cheating, I trust her, but the situation makes me incredibly uncomfortable and for that reason alone she shouldn't do it. And by the way, he is single, and I have never met him.

So it's gotten to a boiling point, I'm furious, she's furious. Misc, what do? Am I wrong? Or should I stand my ground on this?


Cliffs:
-gf of 8 months has guy friend of 4yrs coming to visit
-she offers him to stay with her and her roomates on their couch while he's in town
-I say no, she's says I'm being crazy, what do?

[RookieGER]

stand your ground, your gf knows exactly how this makes you feel, just like you would if you invited a female friend. just think about it

or at least have the guy sleep in a very disrespectful, awkward place, wood be alpha af

[Hesher]

Why aren't you spending the night over there, OP?

Can't plug the same hole twice, nomsayin?

[Nicod3mus]

I don't know man... my girl has an old school friend who is a dood and I would let him sleep on the couch but I also know him well.

Agreed on the invited a girlfriend over to sleep on the couch logic tooo.... you know she be tripppin...


tough call bro.

[TelephoneLines]

Don't care if I get negged, but I would definitely be understanding. One of my good friends is a chick I've known for like 9 years, if she needed a place to crash she could stay at my place no questions asked. If my gf wouldn't understand that then too bad. I would introduce the two of them first of course, so it doesn't seem sketchy. Just ask to meet the guy.

[chalup]

Express the reasoning it makes you feel uncomfortable as if you had a girl "friend" come over and stay with you. Then drop it, if she sloots she sloots bro, it really isn't something to worry about in the long run.

[newleaseonlife]

Wait...

You want your girl to stop being a friend to a guy she's known longer than you, and he's never hit on her?

Dude...there are boundaries you wouldn't want her to cross when it comes to friendship, but you're willing to cross them yourself?

Grow a pair, and stop being insecure. I could see if it was Kyle from psych class she met in august, but this has been her friend for years.

[Ratfish]

you either trust her or you don't

she has infinite opportunities to take dick from thousands of guys if she wants to

if she wanted to fuark this guy, she would and you would never find out

the question isn't whether a dude is in her living space, it's whether you trust her or not

[rocketfish]

guys and girls cant be friends

that guy, low key, is thinking hes about to smash with her. He'll be sleeping in her room, no doubt about it.

[AzzRaze]

Didn't read, i'll guarantee you shes wrong though brah~

[GyMoneyGirls]

Use logic to win your argument, Get loud if you have, get passionate not angry. Meaning never say how you feel but state the facts of the situation if they kunt dont listen to you, kick her in the phucking head mentally. Tell her to stfu and listen if she is being a goofy Bitch

[RookieGER]

I would introduce the two of them first of course, so it doesn't seem sketchy. Just ask to meet the guy.

had this done to me by exgf, felt cuckold af
had to be kinda rude to him all evening to feel good about myself and relationship again srs

[Wopsey]

Friend for 4 years -> never once hit on her. Have we confirmed he's straight? If he's gay there really shouldn't be a problem. How long is he staying?

Although I'm not entirely sure we're on the same page in terms of said visit, you certainly have a right to your opinion and she should address it.

It's a tough situation, and you should certainly stand your ground, but make sure it's for the right reason.

As stated you have a right to your opinion, and if she disregards it you have reason to be upset, but make sure you're not blindly looking at the situation. Arguements like this can lead to 'It has to be done my way' kind of perspective, which should be avoided.

If you genuinely trust her (although you state this your level of frustration tells otherwise) and want this to last, you need to come to some sort of compromise.

Don't fall prey to the misc trap of going NC unless you get your way, that'll guarantee she's blowing Brandon for the visit.

[GetzzBrah]

I will only PIITB Bro, ok?

[newleaseonlife]

Use logic to win your argument, Get loud if you have, get passionate not angry. Meaning never say how you feel but state the facts of the situation if they kunt dont listen to you, kick her in the phucking head mentally. Tell her to stfu and listen if she is being a goofy Bitch

How can one use logic to win an illogical argument? Your post sucks all around.

[y0lked]

youre not wrong OP, I would feel the same way. Personally I hate that girls think they have guys that are "just friends" we all know guys and girls cant be friends without there being something there

[cookiefiend]

I think she is wrong to continue to insist once you have made it clear you are uncomfortable with it. They can still catch up if he goes back to his own hotel room to crash every night.

Don't care if I get negged, but I would definitely be understanding. One of my good friends is a chick I've known for like 9 years, if she needed a place to crash she could stay at my place no questions asked. If my gf wouldn't understand that then too bad.

This logic makes no sense to me, if you care more about how your good friend who happens to be a girl feels more than how your gf feels then why are you with her and not the friend? Seems obvious which you prefer. Your girlfriends thoughts and feelings should come first, assuming this isn't a 2 week relationship or something.

[nctarheels21]

They used to bone in the past, and she has invited him there to try things out again. Definitely run to North Carolina and stay safe OP



Edit: I can confirm, I am her old couch in her hometown.

[SebKK]

are you an alpha gorilla?

If yes you don't give a phuck... if she phucks that dood she will have to bear the consequences.... but trust her mane

[Bar182]

Watch the Big Bang Theory episode that has the exact same plot perhaps.

[newleaseonlife]

And it's her Condo...the one she pays a mortgage and association fees on. If it were you in her shoes you'd tell her to get kickin....but you feel obliged to b1tch about it.

[iwasdrunkbro]

This was on an episode of the big bang theory yesterday. ..funny post tho...damn the poster above beat me to it...

[Metalhead44]

If she wanted to cheat she'd do so anyways,as long as you have a transparent relationship I don't see a problem with letting her guy friend sleep at her house.You're treating her as if she would merely be a victim of her circumstances rather than someone who makes a calculated decision to cheat,essentially you're rationalizing why it wouldn't be her fault(but rather the circumstance) if she cheats.

Wrap your head around that one.

[newleaseonlife]

If she wanted to cheat she'd do so anyways,as long as you have a trnasparent relationship I don't see a problem with letting her guy friend sleep at her house.You're treating her as if she would merely be a victim of her circumstances rather than someone who makes a calculated decision to cheat,essentially you're rationalizing why it wouldn't be hurt fault(but rather the circumstance) if she cheats.

Wrap your head around that one.

He can't. He's too busy trying to convince himself that he trusts his girl.

[awwyeahh]

You're being really insecure dude. It's this kind of behaviour that drives girls away, not bring them closer. If she wanted to cheat on you she would've a long time ago. It doesn't sound like you trust her and this controlling attitude will lead to her eventually resenting you.

[modernsuperman]

Op, I wouldn't be ok with this. Girls can get pretty chummy with their guy friends. Stand your ground if you don't like it. If she doesn't give a fuk about what you think than on to the next one bro. I have a feeling that this kind of shady chit will happen again if you stay with this girl. Good luck!

[wisdommaster1]

guys don't visit girls they have no interest in unless they are gay


notsrs


I dont know how old you are but I'm pretty sure if my gf had some guy coming ot visit her, she would have him rent a room somewhere or stay with some other friend

[Sebt1890]

You're being really insecure dude. It's this kind of behaviour that drives girls away, not bring them closer. If she wanted to cheat on you she would've a long time ago. It doesn't sound like you trust her and this controlling attitude will lead to her eventually resenting you.

Don't care if I get negged, but I would definitely be understanding. One of my good friends is a chick I've known for like 9 years, if she needed a place to crash she could stay at my place no questions asked. If my gf wouldn't understand that then too bad. I would introduce the two of them first of course, so it doesn't seem sketchy. Just ask to meet the guy.

yeah i'm in the same boat, I have friends, male and female crash at my place and my gf is totally cool. she usually stays over.

vice versa too, she has friends crash on her couch who are out of towners simply because my gfs apartment is huge.

Also, don't listen to what ppl say about guys and girls not being able to be just friends. It's very much possible. People on the misc just tend to hang out with meat heads and club sloots.

[newleaseonlife]

You're being really insecure dude. It's this kind of behaviour that drives girls away, not bring them closer. If she wanted to cheat on you she would've a long time ago. It doesn't sound like you trust her and this controlling attitude will lead to her eventually resenting you.

Exactly. She tried to be honest, and look where it got her. Next time she wont be so open.

[ChiBearsfan]

guys and girls cant be friends

that guy, low key, is thinking hes about to smash with her. He'll be sleeping in her room, no doubt about it.

This guy is right.

She was wrong to let him stay at her place, the question is does she know any better.

The only way for her to make it right is for her to tell him he can't stay there, or if you want to be nice she has to stay at your place while he is at hers.

Otherwise assume your GF is getting the D.