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  1. #1
    Banned Ajklpool's Avatar
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    Best rap lyrics of all time / punchlines.

    Post your favourite punchlines, witty concepts, etc...




    Few from me


    "So I don't care if your Mom marries my Paps, I dare you to step brother"

    JR Writer. That was sick and original.

    "have both his hands in the air like 11 '05"

    Murda Mook vs Weezey




    Immortal Technique also has tons of quotables about politics/society.
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  2. #2
    One Tough Hombre magicmatt's Avatar
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    forget ridin' the beat daddy, im paralell parkin' the track - jada
    "Stats are for losers.......final score is for winners........and that's......that's really what it's about." -Bill Belichick-

    "Winning championships doesn't matter. Winning does. And the Braves win better than anybody." - Bacon-
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  3. #3
    One Tough Hombre magicmatt's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by carlmoore30 View Post
    "You got mirrors in your pants, cause i see me in them"
    Tony Yayo - So Seductive
    surely that was a joke. right, that was just a joke?
    "Stats are for losers.......final score is for winners........and that's......that's really what it's about." -Bill Belichick-

    "Winning championships doesn't matter. Winning does. And the Braves win better than anybody." - Bacon-
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  4. #4
    Banned carlmoore30's Avatar
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    "You got mirrors in your pants, cause i see me in them"
    Tony Yayo - So Seductive
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  5. #5
    Registered User spamking's Avatar
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    You can F**k Jill on a hill, you still wont be Jack- Eminem
    .
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  6. #6
    Strong-Ass JEW Crew Fernando Rollins's Avatar
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    Ask beavis I get nothing butthead.
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  7. #7
    Live, Laugh, Dissect RavenStorm's Avatar
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    "You'll be jackin' me quick, I'll order you a drink and stir it wit my dick" -ICP
    TheDukeUSMC told me to edit my sig.

    "get that punk mod off ur sig" - NedStark

    (´・ω・`)

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  8. #8
    Registered User jase_is_ace's Avatar
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    "since when has it become cool to get shot and not shoot back"

    jada on fiddy
    Joke:
    Why couldn't the kid walkthrough the door?

    Cuz he has a javelin through his head
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  9. #9
    Clearly A Canadian! ClearlyCanadian's Avatar
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    Smell the indonesia; beat you to a seizure

    Then **** your moms, hit the skins til amnesia

    She don't remember ****! Just the two hits!

    Her hittin the floor, and me hittin the clits!

    Suckin on the tits! Had the hooker beggin for the dick

    And your moms ain't ugly love; my dick got rock quick

    I guess I was a combination of House of Pain and Bobby Brown

    I was "Humpin Around" and "Jump-in Around"

    Jacked her then I asked her who's the man; she said, "B-I-G"

    Then I bust in her E-Y-E (Yo Big, you're dead wrong)
    BALLS DEEP CREW
    Suck My Ballz™

    Stats 165 lbs 6'1
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    "theres 2 doors in my life, the one that you come into and the one you leave"...badboy2

    "Not all asians are smart. Only ones that come from China" -BenchnCurls

    I rep back ;)
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  10. #10
    APE sword_'s Avatar
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    Listen to Nas' verse on 'Verbal Intercourse' (from Only Built 4 Cuban Linx)
    Athletic Edge Nutrition Online & South Texas Territory Rep
    sword@aenutrition.com

    Buy Intrabolic, Get a 10-serving of LIV Weight Loss for Free! http://www.bodybuilding.com/store/athletic-edge-nutrition/intrabolic.html

    Misc Strength Crew Founder.
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    MMA brah

    Σ B.A.P.F.L Σ

    Masculist #1
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  11. #11
    Registered Fistpumper NYY's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by carlmoore30 View Post
    "You got mirrors in your pants, cause i see me in them"
    Tony Yayo - So Seductive
    That belongs here

    http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=1639511
    **New Jersey Crew (732)**

    Don't run with the herd, run away from it.



    Have an Android device? http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=140799641
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  12. #12
    Registered User 3 sports 1 man's Avatar
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    "With the mic im like a dyke, can't no ni**a f*** with this"

    "i'll stop the alphabet at S, i got it down to a T."

    "Just incase you don't remember me i'll run your brane around the block to jog your fu**** memory"

    "You could date a stick of dynomite and wouldn't go out with a bang"

    "simple as ABCs skip over the Ds and rock the microphone with ease"

    "You couldn't make the fans throw up their hands if they swallowed their fingers"

    All from eminem - 313 from his very first album infinite
    "Go hard or go home"

    "Pain is weakness leaving the body"
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  13. #13
    Beantown Goon - ST dot Boston03G35's Avatar
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    Best in a Battle:

    Jae Millz v Murda Mook = Mook said "I'll blow ya brains in ya hands, tell you hold that thought."
    Catchy:

    Hell Rell - "Bring the Porsche out, show em how the coupe'll roll; Pour Crys on these bitches, like they won the Superbowl."
    Pls respond Brandon

    BRANDON??
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  14. #14
    straight bars no bullsh!t mizzOe's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    Originally Posted by carlmoore30 View Post
    "You got mirrors in your pants, cause i see me in them"
    Tony Yayo - So Seductive
    Thats not even Tony Yayo's idea, that was a pick-up line invented many years ago, Yayo sucks, very much.

    Rise has the craziest punchlines in my opinion.. very consistant

    here's an example

    Rise - Wickedest Flow

    http://www.sendspace.com/file/9yjb6u

    That's right...Rise...yeah, it's me again...

    I got more rhymes than there's rain drops in a storm
    I'm a...head of my time and can't wait till I'm born
    So I can stand strong, hold my ground, nobody can budge Rise
    I was hit by a bus...ten people on that bus died
    I left fine to wreck rhymes you'll never be able
    Use your CD's for mirrors, tapes level my table
    So many labels, known differently all over the world
    Rise; my Indian name is "touches-your-girl"
    Natives kneel to my tape and do all that it wills
    Hold it up like clerks checking if your hundred is real
    The one with the skill, ain't always the one with the deal
    Cuz I don't like a lot of the cats that some of y'all feel
    Self-centered, Rise is the baddest emcee
    My old rhymes my influence, my favorite rapper is me
    An ill emcee, and I hope I'm starting a fad
    My mindstate's so big they'll add a star to the flag

    (scratched)
    "Can't match how I've done this, the wickedest flow"
    "Rise; I kill whack rappers and blame the voices"

    And that's why *****s be at your shows waiting for Rise
    Ignore you during your set and conversate on the side
    Changing the tides, give the world lessons and plans
    When you rhyme around me you'll feel like less of a man
    And for you, writing is tough, your friend's liking my stuff
    Now after hearing me rhyme they won't like you as much
    Try your best but you'll still come up shorter than me
    Your girl will bend backwards for you and forward for me
    On players we run clinics, no saving your ass after
    Hate when whack rappers say they hate whack rappers
    The fact is, I'm the man where ever I'm playing
    You only sell in countries that don't understand what you saying
    *****s seem bold, y'all trying to fit in jeans mold
    But Rise will make an emcee fold like clean clothes
    As I take over the globe, influencing all vicinities
    Change rap, leave behind a world full of mini-me's

    (scratched)
    "Can't match how I've done this, the wickedest flow"
    "Rise; I kill whack rappers and blame the voices"

    Enormous daughters quarters shorter than your chloriphyll pills
    Y'all don't really listen to lyrics if y'all thought that was ill
    That's how a lot of y'all sound though, y'all make it with crap
    Look like you saying something like dummies with hands in their back
    And stay on your lap, and that's what I hate about rap
    Annoyed at you but mad at whoever's paying you cats
    If I hear, one more rapper that's as sick as the flu
    I can't be held accountable for the **** I'ma do
    I sit in the booth, all night, freaking the hits
    My eyes so red they got me in beef with the crips
    To make records that'll get, highly rated and bought
    You never get felt, you're an earthquake in New York
    Keep kicking the lamest raps where you blazing tracks
    But at shows, only the cats that you came with clapped
    The same in fact, for all of you famous cats
    And axis, three six, here to reign, that's that

    (scratched)
    "Can't match how I've done this, the wickedest flow"
    "Rise; I kill whack rappers and blame the voices"



    but then I wouldn't say he's the best lyricist.. not even in my top ten..
    Misc Strength Crew

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  15. #15
    Banned RickRoss's Avatar
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  16. #16
    C21H30O2 WCC's Avatar
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    Big L was the punchline king:

    "i'm the neighbourhood lamper, punani vamper, **** around you'll find my silk boxers in your mother's hamper."

    "ask beavis i get nothing but head"

    Canibus made some great ones too:

    "Line for line I battle any kind of MC at any time
    whether they signed or unsigned
    With many lines, more lines than a million pair of Adidas
    More lines than the bible quoted from Jesus
    More lines than a African herd of zebras"

    "i'm the sickest, most linguistically illicit lyrical misfit in the business
    and probably in existence, what's your consensus?"
    my 6-week Novedex XT log:
    http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=7011981
    ----------
    my 30-day Jungle Warfare log:
    http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=6441581
    ----------
    "NO products are ghey as hell. Search NO-Explode and you'll get a million threads of 17-21 year-old dumbass people that ask how to dose it, how to cycle it, how to snort it off of a homo's ass." - (((A^T^R)))
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  17. #17
    straight bars no bullsh!t mizzOe's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by WCC View Post
    Big L was the punchline king:

    "i'm the neighbourhood lamper, punani vamper, **** around you'll find my silk boxers in your mother's hamper."

    "ask beavis i get nothing but head"

    Canibus made some great ones too:

    "Line for line I battle any kind of MC at any time
    whether they signed or unsigned
    With many lines, more lines than a million pair of Adidas
    More lines than the bible quoted from Jesus
    More lines than a African herd of zebras"

    "i'm the sickest, most linguistically illicit lyrical misfit in the business
    and probably in existence, what's your consensus?"
    my styles vicious and cruel - fuckin chicks is a rule
    if my girl thinks i'm loyal, than that bitch is a fool!
    Misc Strength Crew

    I'm acting like a broke 'Di Nero in Casino
    Addicted to wicked women, reel them in to eat my ego.
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  18. #18
    Registered User KneeGrow's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jordanmacdonald View Post
    Ask beavis I get nothing butthead.
    Classic Big-L
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  19. #19
    One Tough Hombre magicmatt's Avatar
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    i dont even know where to start with canibus, every line of his is a classic.

    my favorite

    i chop off heads just to take the necklace - fantastic 4, dj clue
    "Stats are for losers.......final score is for winners........and that's......that's really what it's about." -Bill Belichick-

    "Winning championships doesn't matter. Winning does. And the Braves win better than anybody." - Bacon-
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  20. #20
    Used Registerer ? 1dayIWillBeBig's Avatar
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    I got my **** in your ******* ******* you ***** in your ****.
    You know how I know you're gay?
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  21. #21
    Banned RickRoss's Avatar
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    I wrote rhymes on papyrus
    Clutch the obelisk
    Manifest the true in livin' , reveal the obvious
    Prominent, dominant
    Hand secret documents
    And all the high continents monuments
    Only to be awaken by your third consciousness
    Honor this
    I hold the secrets to life now with my esophagus
    Renew my history every time I build with wisdom
    So when they go I don't have regrets
    Diss 'em and miss 'em
    I'm the light and the prism
    The glitch in the system
    The assertive victim
    Who murdered death
    Managed rhythm
    Got hyper to the chill with sniper skills
    Focus my goal
    Took a stronghold on my soul
    And puffed an L just to inhale hell
    Conversatin' with Satan
    Contemplatin' to add on elimination
    Baptize my lips and spit the Holy Grail
    Destined to fail, arrogance, causin earthquakes in hell
    Old people gossip, adults criticize
    We all judgmental, but can't control our own lives
    I realized
    The worlds on my dick so I pissed in public
    Balance the skills, some real hate and love ****
    For each slug that hit I got a script with the same
    Impact with 10 gats, yo in fact I speak frame
    Focus on the real cause I've been that
    I got a plan for the self hatred: end that

    [Hook - 2X]
    (*3X*){"Read, study lessons and build your inner power"}
    {"The next level doesn't tolerate cowards"}

    [Verse 2 - C-Rayz Walz]
    I play 21 with crack heads
    Slap box rats
    My blocks a danger chamber
    Strangers chased by gats
    I'm the black target
    Spit first, make the jam last
    Relentless trenches, beats buried in sand bags
    Blast back, splash tracks run on water
    My new world order buckshot like terry porter
    Blaze trails you way frail like Puffy in jail
    Ya'll drink bubbly in hell
    I'm prevail and inhale
    Circle the globe and pose like the son of Jarell
    Contact the most high before your eyes get the smell
    Your head swells
    Thoughts get heavy like barbells
    C-Rayz born to blaze in my presence you carvels
    Chiseled in the culture
    Conscious cartel
    Do the math like vultures
    While the god dwells
    On the actual fact my bright light violet-ultra
    Biting these words will cause ulcers

    {"Read"} {"Read"}

    [Verse 3 - C-Rayz Walz]
    Subterranean brain stats and dirty train tracks rats
    **** the fame black in the end we the same cats
    Nourishment from maggots, soil for the earth
    Life is ritual, death is not a curse
    If we sin first we are blessed in the last stage
    I reflect the past age and think straight like Gibraltar
    Meditate, burn incense at my alter
    Call libation for great queens and forefathers
    I shave brother I come with philafia
    Understand in my eyes is supreme colour copier
    My afterlife as simple as black and white
    Still movement like water reflecting the moonlight
    I hear voices in my head and obey what they send through
    Ancient vocals upon my thought instrumental
    Read, study lessons, build your inner power
    Sick ciphers, the minute's being born to this hour

    C rayz walz - degrees
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  22. #22
    Registered User Ppla21's Avatar
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    Cormega-Beautiful mind

    "some blind with fury from seeing me shining,
    like a phoenix arising from the depths showin the reaper defiance"


    from

    I'm sick of gossipping bitches and *****z who gossip like bitches
    claimin' they live but if you pop 'em they snitchin'
    some watch from the building and gain knowledge of dealers
    knowin' they lack the heart of those thats out on the benches
    I was out in the trenches-which enables me
    to write such a powerful picture like Apocolypse Now
    I put my heart in my lyrics everytime I sit down to write
    My *Source* a inspiration, ain't three and a half mics
    I must have been an MC in my past life
    presently I'm unquestionably poetic, I'm mad nice
    people act like I don't deserve nothing I got

    I grew up in the spot, my sleep was interrupted by customers knocks
    some of y'all should just stop the animosity you got for me luck it was not
    for years we ran our projects like a marathon, its catastrophic
    our time, death, and pride came out on conquest
    subsequently some are with me others ain't, yet the gutter's within me
    I wish for nothing except that my mother was with me
    some place judgement against me based on nothing but envy
    they pray for My Downfall like the song by Biggie
    born in the city which never sleeps to rest in peace
    its carved in stone, some starved while others bled to eat
    rap is my legacy, I leave my seed my destiny
    except I hope she never see the treachery success can bring
    the trife life and death of kings

    I'm from the rarest breed of people who rep the street and spit poetically
    never sleep, rest assured Mega is dope in his pure form
    the dealer/MC keepin it real is my protocal
    fall back I got you open off the style I was workin on it
    the beat is lifeless, 'till I put my verses on it
    I reminisce confinement as I read a kite
    from my people with secret indictment freedom and triumph
    contemplating putting sprees on the tires
    dominating this beat with my rhyming as if you need a reminder
    I spit that drug dealer **** you might have seen on The Wire
    what other lyricist is known for giving people cosignment
    I'm eager to find my equal wit rhyming, I rock Iceberg jeans with the Nikes
    an extremist with rhymin deep as Poseidon
    breedin' in violence now I live in a peaceful enviroment
    a secret asylum from the streets where people be wilding
    some blind with fury from seeing me shining
    like a phoenix arising from the depths showin the reaper defiance


    Mega=best lyricist alive..hands down
    Last edited by Ppla21; 03-01-2007 at 10:39 AM.
    Cause nothing moves faster than the hands of time
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  23. #23
    Registered User Mr.Hombre's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Ppla21 View Post
    "some blind with fury from seeing me shining,
    like a phoenix arising from the depths showin the reaper defiance"


    from

    I'm sick of gossipping bitches and *****z who gossip like bitches
    claimin' they live but if you pop 'em they snitchin'
    some watch from the building and gain knowledge of dealers
    knowin' they lack the heart of those thats out on the benches
    I was out in the trenches-which enables me
    to write such a powerful picture like Apocolypse Now
    I put my heart in my lyrics everytime I sit down to write
    My *Source* a inspiration, ain't three and a half mics
    I must have been an MC in my past life
    presently I'm unquestionably poetic, I'm mad nice
    people act like I don't deserve nothing I got

    I grew up in the spot, my sleep was interrupted by customers knocks
    some of y'all should just stop the animosity you got for me luck it was not
    for years we ran our projects like a marathon, its catastrophic
    our time, death, and pride came out on conquest
    subsequently some are with me others ain't, yet the gutter's within me
    I wish for nothing except that my mother was with me
    some place judgement against me based on nothing but envy
    they pray for My Downfall like the song by Biggie
    born in the city which never sleeps to rest in peace
    its carved in stone, some starved while others bled to eat
    rap is my legacy, I leave my seed my destiny
    except I hope she never see the treachery success can bring
    the trife life and death of kings

    I'm from the rarest breed of people who rep the street and spit poetically
    never sleep, rest assured Mega is dope in his pure form
    the dealer/MC keepin it real is my protocal
    fall back I got you open off the style I was workin on it
    the beat is lifeless, 'till I put my verses on it
    I reminisce confinement as I read a kite
    from my people with secret indictment freedom and triumph
    contemplating putting sprees on the tires
    dominating this beat with my rhyming as if you need a reminder
    I spit that drug dealer **** you might have seen on The Wire
    what other lyricist is known for giving people cosignment
    I'm eager to find my equal wit rhyming, I rock Iceberg jeans with the Nikes
    an extremist with rhymin deep as Poseidon
    breedin' in violence now I live in a peaceful enviroment
    a secret asylum from the streets where people be wilding
    some blind with fury from seeing me shining
    like a phoenix arising from the depths showin the reaper defiance


    Mega=best lyricist alive..hands down
    good lyricist, with possibly the ****tiest flow ever. He should be a ghostwriter. The same applies for Immortal Technique and MF Doom. All of them need to stop rapping ASAP
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  24. #24
    straight bars no bullsh!t mizzOe's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Mr.Hombre View Post
    good lyricist, with possibly the ****tiest flow ever. He should be a ghostwriter. The same applies for Immortal Technique and MF Doom. All of them need to stop rapping ASAP
    Mega's flow on

    Tragedy Khadafi ft Cormega - Break Bread

    is pretty crazy.
    Misc Strength Crew

    I'm acting like a broke 'Di Nero in Casino
    Addicted to wicked women, reel them in to eat my ego.
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  25. #25
    Registered User GOON_'s Avatar
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    MF DOOM is so sick lyrically, but his voice doesn't sound nearly as good as it did from the days of KMD... the illest group ever, hands down
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  26. #26
    12 20 28 .410 Les Paul's Avatar
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    Now you know I ain't wit that ****, Lieutenant
    Ain't no pussy good enough to get burnt while I'm up in it

    -SDD
    *** Misc Cigar Crew ***

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  27. #27
    Registered User Mr.Hombre's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by mizzOe View Post
    Mega's flow on

    Tragedy Khadafi ft Cormega - Break Bread

    is pretty crazy.
    thanks...i'll check that song out
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  28. #28
    straight bars no bullsh!t mizzOe's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    Originally Posted by Mr.Hombre View Post
    thanks...i'll check that song out
    Here it is

    Tragedy Khadafi ft Cormega - Break Bread

    http://www.sendspace.com/file/smojyn
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    Addicted to wicked women, reel them in to eat my ego.
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  29. #29
    Registered User cyclic17's Avatar
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    Rollin, in my 5.0 with the ragtop down so my hair can flow...
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  30. #30
    Registered User Ghetto Boy's Avatar
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    Run up on a mutha****er while he ****in a chick
    put a bullet in her head while she suckin his dick-Tech N9ne

    I ran pain in the pit of your brain
    wit an unforgivable aim-More tech N9ne



    Any tech n9ne joint is lyrikal Ive never heard a bad tech song
    **** jus trying to make my dream a reality
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