Lost my girlfriend, my job, my grades, and my working out motivation

[Sadbrah123]

Prior to my breakup, I had a stable job. I was doing well in school. I was bulking up for 8 months nonstop and eating right and gained a good 14-15 lb of natty muscle.

My ex girlfriend left me and being the love of my life, who I gave and did EVERYTHING for (literally bought a car just to visit her), and she left me without even telling me why. All I know is that she would stop replying to my texts, make me wait 6 hours for a reply, even she would be online on ******** and whatsapp and she would skip my texts to talk to others and when I asked who? She said friends. Like wtf...

She broke my heart and im fairly certain was cheating on me.

Since she did this, I broke down and I got fired. I started skipping classes and im struggling to keep my grades. And working out? Been 2 months. I've gained 20 lbs of fat. I've lost all hope.

Please help me. I can't think of another dude touching her without tearing up. My life is in the ****ter and if I keep this up, I won't have the grades for law school. I don't even want to leave my room because the only thing that fits me are sweats and XL sized tshirts now (body fat at 30% based on electronic and handheld calipers and 205 lbs).

I had to make a new account just to ask this because she has me as a friend on my other bodyspace...

[-Ironside-]

Prior to my breakup, I had a stable job. I was doing well in school. I was bulking up for 8 months nonstop and eating right and gained a good 14-15 lb of natty muscle.

My ex girlfriend left me and being the love of my life, who I gave and did EVERYTHING for (literally bought a car just to visit her), and she left me without even telling me why. All I know is that she would stop replying to my texts, make me wait 6 hours for a reply, even she would be online on ******** and whatsapp and she would skip my texts to talk to others and when I asked who? She said friends. Like wtf...

She broke my heart and im fairly certain was cheating on me.

Since she did this, I broke down and I got fired. I started skipping classes and im struggling to keep my grades. And working out? Been 2 months. I've gained 20 lbs of fat. I've lost all hope.

Please help me. I can't think of another dude touching her without tearing up. My life is in the ****ter and if I keep this up, I won't have the grades for law school. I don't even want to leave my room because the only thing that fits me are sweats and XL sized tshirts now (body fat at 30% based on electronic and handheld calipers and 205 lbs).

I had to make a new account just to ask this because she has me as a friend on my other bodyspace...

You're only 20, too young to find the love of your life anyways. Bro, this is a blessing. Get in awesome shape I mean ****ing steller shape and when you see her in a few months with her new geek BF and you're with 2 hot super models, you'll feel better about yourself.

Your handheld calipers need to be adjusted, get a screw driver and a hammer, take out the back screw near the battery then smash it to **** with a hammer because those things are full of ****.

Seriously bro, don't go jumping back into some new relationship. You're not even 21 yet, go have some damn fun.
Oh yea and get your ass to a gym and work out. Nothing like blowing off a bit of steam, spend half the damn day there when you're not at school or at work.
Now stop your damn moping and go

[Sadbrah123]

You're only 20, too young to find the love of your life anyways. Bro, this is a blessing. Get in awesome shape I mean ****ing steller shape and when you see her in a few months with her new geek BF and you're with 2 hot super models, you'll feel better about yourself.

Your handheld calipers need to be adjusted, get a screw driver and a hammer, take out the back screw near the battery then smash it to **** with a hammer because those things are full of ****.

Seriously bro, don't go jumping back into some new relationship. You're not even 21 yet, go have some damn fun.
Oh yea and get your ass to a gym and work out. Nothing like blowing off a bit of steam, spend half the damn day there when you're not at school or at work.
Now stop your damn moping and go

To be quite honest bro, I don't have the confidence to even approach a girl right now. My gut is disgusting. Non of my nice clothes fit. Like, I am trying to find the motivation to go but I am just so damn behind in school and it takes away so much time.. What suggestion do you have? I am trying to fix my grades because I really wanna get into NYU law (yeah I am ambitious still).

[Sandyien]

You're only 20, too young to find the love of your life anyways. Bro, this is a blessing. Get in awesome shape I mean ****ing steller shape and when you see her in a few months with her new geek BF and you're with 2 hot super models, you'll feel better about yourself.

Your handheld calipers need to be adjusted, get a screw driver and a hammer, take out the back screw near the battery then smash it to **** with a hammer because those things are full of ****.

Seriously bro, don't go jumping back into some new relationship. You're not even 21 yet, go have some damn fun.
Oh yea and get your ass to a gym and work out. Nothing like blowing off a bit of steam, spend half the damn day there when you're not at school or at work.
Now stop your damn moping and go

I agree with you, mate.

Sadbrah123 - Enjoy your life till you're young, wild n free.. I know your feeling.. But start to do everything from beginning with that I mean - Try to apologize to your boss to take you back in work, explain him everything..
Make your own goals and do the best to reach them, never give up, no matters what it will takes... If more you will do, then less you will think about her. Think from other side, why do you need her, if she is so rood.
Try to get back in your previous work or get new one, start to visit a gym, hang out with friends and much more.. Stay busy.. More busy you'll be, then less you will think about her. Enjoy your life, mate. If you need any help about gym, then contact me email ( girlsorgym@yahoo.com - instagram email )
I don't want to be rood, but GET UP YOUR ASS AND CHANGE YOUR LIFE, MATE. YOU'RE TOO STRONG TO BE WEAK!!!!!!

NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!!!

Sorry for any mistakes, English is not my first language. Sorry about that. I'm doing the best.
Thank you.

[-Ironside-]

Sounds like you need to focus on school then but your mental state will go hand in hand with your physical one.
My suggestion, use the gym at school if you get a chance. Wake up ass crack early and start running, 30min-1hr every morning before school.
Show up there after breakfast ready to go.
Eat healthier, do some push ups and stuff like that when you can. On off days, try some P90X, it's seriously a decent program that you can do at home but your main focus should definitely be school. You're young, women will come.

[jjsally7]

So what you are saying is you have no job, no dick and you are glued to your ass... Make it happen, its up to you man. Take that passion for your ex woman and apply it to your success. Yeah it hurts but get over it. There will be bigger trials ahead this is just a bump in the road.

[Tugia]

Prior to my breakup, I had a stable job. I was doing well in school. I was bulking up for 8 months nonstop and eating right and gained a good 14-15 lb of natty muscle.

My ex girlfriend left me and being the love of my life, who I gave and did EVERYTHING for (literally bought a car just to visit her), and she left me without even telling me why. All I know is that she would stop replying to my texts, make me wait 6 hours for a reply, even she would be online on ******** and whatsapp and she would skip my texts to talk to others and when I asked who? She said friends. Like wtf...

She broke my heart and im fairly certain was cheating on me.

Since she did this, I broke down and I got fired. I started skipping classes and im struggling to keep my grades. And working out? Been 2 months. I've gained 20 lbs of fat. I've lost all hope.

Please help me. I can't think of another dude touching her without tearing up. My life is in the ****ter and if I keep this up, I won't have the grades for law school. I don't even want to leave my room because the only thing that fits me are sweats and XL sized tshirts now (body fat at 30% based on electronic and handheld calipers and 205 lbs).

I had to make a new account just to ask this because she has me as a friend on my other bodyspace...

Forget her. It's much easier said than done, but you can do it. We've all been there, man. No one gets away without getting hurt in a relationship at some point. There's no avoiding the pain, but it'll only get worse if you keep feeling sorry for yourself. Man up. You got this. Get in the gym and lift like there is no tomorrow. She'll get hers. Karma always comes around. You're young and have so many opportunities in front of you. It seems liek the end of the world when you think "the one" is leaving you, but there's always someone else out there who is even better for you. This girlfriend of yours is obviously not the one if she's pulling this ****. So get off up your butt, and get your life together. You can do it, and you'll be much happier when you do.

[Sadbrah123]

You guys are all literally f*ckin awesome man. I feel a bit more motivated now. I decided today to delete all her photos and texts. When I come back shredded as fuark, rollin up with my new BMW with a nyu law degree, she's gonna wish she didn't leave.

One last question, I'm incredibly overweight now, but I am not sure if I should cut or bulk.

My stats are 200 lb, 30% bodyfat, bench/squat/deadlift 225 3x5/275 3x5/275 3x3. I really really like the fact that despite I've got a gut going on, I can see the mass underneath. And I really want to hit 3 plates squat and deadlift and 2plate 25 bench. This might be a 2 month or so endeavour. Should I continue bulking or just cut now? My goal is aesthetics but I love strength too - absolutely love being given respect for being strong. It's a hard choice and I know the negatives of bulking on a high body fat (apart from the appearance), but what do you guys suggest?

[-Ironside-]

You guys are all literally f*ckin awesome man. I feel a bit more motivated now. I decided today to delete all her photos and texts. When I come back shredded as fuark, rollin up with my new BMW with a nyu law degree, she's gonna wish she didn't leave.

One last question, I'm incredibly overweight now, but I am not sure if I should cut or bulk.

My stats are 200 lb, 30% bodyfat, bench/squat/deadlift 225 3x5/275 3x5/275 3x3. I really really like the fact that despite I've got a gut going on, I can see the mass underneath. And I really want to hit 3 plates squat and deadlift and 2plate 25 bench. This might be a 2 month or so endeavour. Should I continue bulking or just cut now? My goal is aesthetics but I love strength too - absolutely love being given respect for being strong. It's a hard choice and I know the negatives of bulking on a high body fat (apart from the appearance), but what do you guys suggest?

1st: good, you'll be over her in a week

2nd: post a pic. Don't trust handheld devices.

3rd: Bodyfat is anabolic, you could slam on a **** load of mass now and then when you do cut you'll be a rock.

Let's see what we're working with

[OfficerJimLahey]

You guys are all literally f*ckin awesome man. I feel a bit more motivated now. I decided today to delete all her photos and texts. When I come back shredded as fuark, rollin up with my new BMW with a nyu law degree, she's gonna wish she didn't leave.

Glad you found some motivation, and I think it's a solid move to delete all the photos and texts. The only thing I'll point out is that it's probably going to help you more if you keep everything in terms of you; yeah she might wish she didn't leave, but who cares about you. Your success is about you, enjoy it and don't worry about how she'll feel. Keep on the right path man.

[-Ironside-]

Glad you found some motivation, and I think it's a solid move to delete all the photos and texts. The only thing I'll point out is that it's probably going to help you more if you keep everything in terms of you; yeah she might wish she didn't leave, but who cares about you. Your success is about you, enjoy it and don't worry about how she'll feel. Keep on the right path man.

Vengeance is a great motivator

[Goos1516]

Bud i was in exactly the same boat as you were, i met the love of my life, we were together for 3 years and i did eveything for her untill she ended up cheating on me and marrying the guy.

I got over her cause there is other things to life than crying over some girl, i let nothing destract me i made a few goals and took them head on, i said the rest of my life will be the best of my life.

I started to train, i shred bodyfat like you could not believe , i was motivated and full of energy, my friends could see the hardwork was paying off and went i went out the girls couldnt help but notice the improvements but i was shy as hell and didn even have the courage to talk to them so they came to me LOL.

Anyways the kicker to this is my ex is now divorced cause her husband cheated on her while she was pregnant and she still had the audacity to ask me if i could give her another chance. Ive been with the love of my life for 2 years now and planning of popping the question to her in Dec.

Everything happens for a reason mate and stay positive, Im 30 now and when i was your age i shouldnt even be thinking of woman, i should have been enoying life, saving cash, travelling, meeting new friends.

TRUST ME BUD, YOU'LL BE JUST FINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! now get that body into the gym and smash those weights.

[Thunder326]

You guys are all literally f*ckin awesome man. I feel a bit more motivated now. I decided today to delete all her photos and texts. When I come back shredded as fuark, rollin up with my new BMW with a nyu law degree, she's gonna wish she didn't leave.

One last question, I'm incredibly overweight now, but I am not sure if I should cut or bulk.

My stats are 200 lb, 30% bodyfat, bench/squat/deadlift 225 3x5/275 3x5/275 3x3. I really really like the fact that despite I've got a gut going on, I can see the mass underneath. And I really want to hit 3 plates squat and deadlift and 2plate 25 bench. This might be a 2 month or so endeavour. Should I continue bulking or just cut now? My goal is aesthetics but I love strength too - absolutely love being given respect for being strong. It's a hard choice and I know the negatives of bulking on a high body fat (apart from the appearance), but what do you guys suggest?

Revenge will start you but will fail you in time so use it as a catalyst to start you on your change but don't make it your whole focus or in time if/when she does see you it may not mean anything to her and then all your work will feel like it was for nothing. Instead I would advise change your being for your betterement and your growth to prove to you that you can overcome your daily challenges. These little victories will propel you forward and not be for the approval of someone else.

As to stregnth vs aesthetics why can't you have both? Not all powerlifters are huge fat guys and not all body builders use the pink weights so train for gains in both sides and I think you'll find the best balance overall.

[-Ironside-]

As to stregnth vs aesthetics why can't you have both? Not all powerlifters are huge fat guys and not all body builders use the pink weights so train for gains in both sides and I think you'll find the best balance overall.

Agreed, I focus on strength and being functional for what I used to do. Aesthetics is a side effect of being strong and healthy.
What you got against pink weights bro!?

[klaximilian]

To be quite honest bro, I don't have the confidence to even approach a girl right now. My gut is disgusting. Non of my nice clothes fit. Like, I am trying to find the motivation to go but I am just so damn behind in school and it takes away so much time.. What suggestion do you have? I am trying to fix my grades because I really wanna get into NYU law (yeah I am ambitious still).

-Ironside- is right. You are 20 years old. It's not often that you find the love of your life at 20 - Clearly she wasn't the one. But don't harp on it, it's just a minor bump in the road of life that you will get past. It's adversity - We all face it. The question for you is do you want to maintain a "woe is me" attitude, or do you want to learn from it, make yourself better, and become happier than before?

Start small - small victories will eventually win you the war. One foot in front of the other. Go to class. Find a job that works around your schedule. Start lifting and get your diet in check. EAT WELL! Twenty pounds is nothing. You can cut that in a couple months and be back to your normal self. And when you get back to that level, put your foot on the MF'ing throttle and never take it off.

You will probably run into your ex again one day. Make sure you let her know the massive mistake she made and that you are better off without her.

Most importantly, hold your head up high and stay focused.