De-Motivated to work out, any advice?

[stevebeans]

Last time I hit the gym on a regular basis, I finally reached my goal of benching 45lb plates. Finally, no more small weights! However, it's been about a year and a half since I've been at the gym and know for certain I will be lucky to put up the 25lb plates for the first few times.

Bench pressing is the only area where I feel super self conscious about because it's so visible and the weight difference can be huge and noticeable... well, squatting is another actually.

So, how do you deal with the feeling of looking like a complete wimp warming up with the bar and then tossing on 25lb plates to bench? I know it's easy to say 'just ignore it', but that's easier said than done.

What's worse is, even when I could bench 45lb plates, I was doing the alll-pro newbie full body workout routine where do like 100% on Mon, 90% on Wed and 80% on Fri. So only one day of the week I actually went in there and felt semi-strong and the other two days (especially friday) I wanted to pop on a 45lb plate just to show I can do it. I know few are actually watching and less actually care, but it's always in the back of my head feeling weak.

I hate feeling like a newbie or bad at anything, and unlike most things, I can't simply work at it privately until I'm not embarrassed about my performance. Any suggestions would be great!

[mikedito]

Always remember that everyone had to start somewhere. The biggest guys you see walking around were once in your shoes. It just takes time and hard work. if bench press has you uneasy, try using dumbbells instead.

Stay consistent and you'll be back to where you were in no time.

[oldschoolifter]

Always remember that everyone had to start somewhere. The biggest guys you see walking around were once in your shoes. It just takes time and hard work. if bench press has you uneasy, try using dumbbells instead.

Stay consistent and you'll be back to where you were in no time.

I am one of the bigger guys in my gym. Now.
Wasn't always that way. I remember when I was where you are at.
I was 150 lbs. and 6'3" when I started at 17 yrs. old. Most shy kid there ever was.
23 years later, I'm 264 to 276 lbs.
Took me 7 years of steady lifting to hit 3 plates.

You have got to internalize your lifting if you are going to go the long haul.
Forget about partners and everyone else. Put your headphones on and follow your program. Keep a training log.
Mike gave you some great advice above. Lift 5 days a week. Eat like a horse, keep it clean.
Invest in a power cage and some weights at home. Every good artist or craftsman has tools.
Technique is everything in benching. Buy the Westside guide to bench pressing book. Ryan Kennelly's book "The Kennelly method" is good also.

You can do this. I'm benching 370 for reps at 40 years old.
And I couldn't do a plate when I started. Be consistent and the confidence and muscles will come.

[stevebeans]

Thanks for the tips so far. Getting a bench / rack at my house would be pretty sweet, especially to get me through the hump of embarrassment. A rack would be nice too so I wouldn't need a spotter. The only problem is my basement is 77" high and most I see online at 85" +/- ... Do you know of any adjustable racks?

[schoobs]

The only people who notice how much you are lifting, are people who are more self-conscious and nervous than you are...trust me. Most people in there are so in-tune to what they are doing, they barely even notice your shadow going around to the different machines.
I've said this before in here but when I go to the gym, I throw on headphones, bring my little notebook and i don't even notice my surroundings...I am there to do my thing, and thats pretty much it. My lifts are WEEEAAAKKK compared to what I look like I can lift, but so be it.

[oldschoolifter]

Thanks for the tips so far. Getting a bench / rack at my house would be pretty sweet, especially to get me through the hump of embarrassment. A rack would be nice too so I wouldn't need a spotter. The only problem is my basement is 77" high and most I see online at 85" +/- ... Do you know of any adjustable racks?

Never saw an adjustable rack, but you could always cut it , drill a couple of holes and bolt it back together.
If you don't have the tools or skills, take it to a metal fab shop. They would charge next to nothing to make a couple cuts and holes.

[imazinger]

dude you got to want it to get it , who give a phuk what people think . You have to start some where ,you got to set goals ,you have to hit it hard and push through it . Who are you lifting for you ? or us?

[java568]

Just remember the bigger the person is the more likely it is that:
A) They've been doing this long enough that they're probably in there to do their own thing and aren't paying attention to others.
B) They've seen people struggling with way less weight than you're using
C) Don't give a **** about what you're doing unless you're doing stupid **** and getting in the way

[DirtyD79]

It's just like the NIKE shirts say "Just do it!" All those ripped dudes and giant powerlifters you see in the magazines all had to start somewhere. Nobody was born a member of the 1,000 lbs. club. They all had to work at it. I've been lifting off and on since I was about 14 and have been in more than a few gyms and weight rooms. In all that time I never saw anybody getting busted on for what he or she lifts. Those big ripped dudes and gorilla lookin' powerlifters or the cardio bunnies on the treadmill most likely aren't even going to notice you or care what you lift. Me, when I'm lifting I get into the zone. The gym could be on fire and I wouldn't even care. I pay no attention to whatever anybody else is doing. I'm there for me. The way I see it, if you've got time to criticize others you've got time to go bang out some more reps. DO WORK!

[stevebeans]

Just remember the bigger the person is the more likely it is that:
A) They've been doing this long enough that they're probably in there to do their own thing and aren't paying attention to others.
B) They've seen people struggling with way less weight than you're using
C) Don't give a **** about what you're doing unless you're doing stupid **** and getting in the way

As far as B, do you often see skinny newbies struggling with < 35lb plates often? If so, that's definitely a relief. Once I get back going, 35 is typically my workout weight until I can squeeze my way back to 45

[AXnyc]

Bro, your fears are ridiculous. The reason why you feel like that is because you worry about what everybody else is doing and being on the same level or keeping up with people who have been lifting for a long time. I can assure you that 99% of the people at the gym, especially the ones that have been lifting for a while and putting up serious weight, really don't care about how little you bench. I can assure you nobody is there standing and focusing on your benching and thinking to himself OMG look at him!!!!!!! People do their own workout lost in their on thoughts. You should do the same thing. Make sure you get to the gym tomorrow!

[AXnyc]

As far as B, do you often see skinny newbies struggling with < 35lb plates often? If so, that's definitely a relief. Once I get back going, 35 is typically my workout weight until I can squeeze my way back to 45

Again....stop worrying about that!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nobody cares if you bench 25lbs or 45lbs.........Most people don't even notice this kind of stuff. Its all in your head. Stop focusing on what other people are lifting too. Make sure you constantly doing everything in your power to make your own progress and walk your own journey. Its all in your head.

[stevebeans]

Again....stop worrying about that!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nobody cares if you bench 25lbs or 45lbs.........Most people don't even notice this kind of stuff. Its all in your head. Stop focusing on what other people are lifting too. Make sure you constantly doing everything in your power to make your own progress and walk your own journey. Its all in your head.

It's definitely all in my head unfortunately.

[Motiviert]

This may not help, and if not I am sorry buddy..but here is my journey. By looking at the pictures you can see why I HAD to stay motivated. Good luck brother..you can do this.

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...post1282709221

[jessica693254]

Hello keep working out, stay on your diet, you can do it!!!!!!!!

[bsnyds]

There's no magical answer. Everyone has it pretty much right, including yourself. It's in your head! It's simply a matter of putting your head down and doing the work. It doesn't matter where you start. It's about the journey and discovering new things about yourself each day. If you stay consistent with your training and eating you will see results. Change the little voice in your head. When it says "everyone thinks your a wimp with your 25lb plates." Talk back to it, tell it "This is one day on the way to benching 225lbs". I strongly believe in the power of visualization. You need to see, feel, hear, smell what it's like to put up that goal weight, repeat that everyday. What your mind perceives, your body will achieve.