[SRS] Depression Discussion and Support Thread Part II

[mcdonaldsmeal]

Iceman, I wasn't a happy child either!
I think my life changed when my Dad forced me to watch him beat the **** outta my mother when I was 6.

[jolanar1]

I've struggled with depression my whole life. It's been on or off thing for me. I find it's definitely worse when I am alone. Which sucks because I've always had a real hard time making friends.

My GF just dumped me. We were only together for a couple months so I don't miss her, but I do miss constantly having something to do. It's so hard to be depressed when you just don't have time for it. Versus right now where I am just sitting alone in my apartment on the internet feeling lonely as fuk.

We're all gonna make it brahs. (I hope)

[FallOutBrah]

If I do not get ECT or if it doesnt work im gonna die. No point in living if you cant even stand from being so miserable and weak. It also sucks being alone.

aware me on ECT? is it worth a shot?

[IcemanIsDead]

If I do not get ECT or if it doesnt work im gonna die. No point in living if you cant even stand from being so miserable and weak. It also sucks being alone.

Have you tried CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) or regular therapy? How about meds?

Iceman, I wasn't a happy child either!
I think my life changed when my Dad forced me to watch him beat the **** outta my mother when I was 6.

That's fuked up, I'm sorry to hear man

I've struggled with depression my whole life. It's been on or off thing for me. I find it's definitely worse when I am alone. Which sucks because I've always had a real hard time making friends.

My GF just dumped me. We were only together for a couple months so I don't miss her, but I do miss constantly having something to do. It's so hard to be depressed when you just don't have time for it. Versus right now where I am just sitting alone in my apartment on the internet feeling lonely as fuk.

We're all gonna make it brahs. (I hope)

I'm in the same boat, but I have a gf atm, which is nice. But whenever I'm alone I do feel that it's easier to get sad, unless I'm going to the gym or playing guitar.

[FallOutBrah]

on therapy...I've been going for the past 5 years. nothing has changed. I still feel the same.

and I don't like taking medications because often they make me feel like a zombie.

[SiberianExpress]

Ignore the troll.

[jolanar1]

I'm in the same boat, but I have a gf atm, which is nice. But whenever I'm alone I do feel that it's easier to get sad, unless I'm going to the gym or playing guitar.

One thing I've found that's helped me in the last few years is to maintain a really close relationship with my parents. I go cycling with my dad every Saturday and go eat dinner with my mom once a week as well. It helps to be reminded often that they are there for you, even if they can be annoying at times lol. I know that's not always an option for everyone though.

I've definitely gotten better with "the struggle", lifting has helped a ton but mostly it's just knowing that it does come and go. So when I'm in the thick of it I know if I just grin and bear it maybe it will be better next week. When I was younger I thought that it was going to be a "permanent" feeling.

Another thing I've found is that talking about it definitely helps. Just writing out these two posts has made me feel a ton better even though it really doesn't amount to much besides rambling to strangers lol.

[SiberianExpress]

I sometimes wonder how many people i interact with daily that are secretly like me. I may as well adopt a new name/identity at work because the personality i use to get by is so fake. I doubt i give off the slightest hint that anything is remotely wrong with me or my life.

Faking it is so unbelievably draining. I wonder if anyone i know is faking it just like me.

[sambris24]

I get random levels of depression throughout the year, but then next minute I'm on top of the world, maybe that's bi polar. Either way I definitely got it from my mum

[120908]

Many unknown posters in the depression thread apart from bigtime and falloutbrah

[lexbishop]

I'm not much depressed anymore, in fact it's mostly financial and a little social, but I know I can fix those.
I was suicidally depressed for years and years so this actually is pretty impressive if I do say so myself.

What I did:

-Accept that I had become a loser from bad choices
-Got my family off my case aka mutual respect
-Learn to stand up for myself
-Cut drinking down
-Vitamin D3, Complex B, Fish Oil, Magnesium. All of those 2x daily. <--Massive mood change over time.
-Got a full time job with good benefits
-Cut out friends who drag me down
-Cut out friends who aren't mutually beneficial / somewhat of a burden
-Started creating a schedule for errands
-Started exercising and lifting again
-Started tanning again and buying new clothes (let's face it, we feel better when we look better)
-Set aside time 3 days a week to study for future positions
-Set aside time for hobbies
-Started to forgive myself for making bad choices
-Started to forgive people who wronged me
-Make plans two times a month with mom and dad to go out for lunch
-Make plans at least twice a month with friends to do activities or just hang out
-Multiple Spring cleanings as necessary
-Structure / discipline / organization

The hardest part was accepting becoming a loser without mentally beating myself up. That led me to hard drinking for way too long. Once I did the rest of the changes made themselves.

The second hardest was making the right choices and not falling back into bad habits. It takes a long time to dig out of a hole.

[volkan96]

Chit childhood
Fa
Beta
Virgin
I dont know what to do with my life, I have absolutely no hope that I'll make it.
Dont think I'll live before I see my 20's

[hidingwithmusic]

aware me on ECT? is it worth a shot?

Ect has a 70% remission rate compared to medication being 20%. It is also safe as you are put to sleep during it.

[mcdonaldsmeal]

Ect has a 70% remission rate compared to medication being 20%. It is also safe as you are put to sleep during it.

Its also electrical damage to your brain, that's why it's the last resort.

[SiberianExpress]

Chit childhood
Fa
Beta
Virgin
I dont know what to do with my life, I have absolutely no hope that I'll make it.
Dont think I'll live before I see my 20's

You're younger than 20 and a virgin? So what. I lost my virginity at 20 and trust me it makes no difference. I'd rather be a virgin in a happy relationship than where i am now.

I understand from your post that you're a FA anyway but just making the point that you shouldn't focus on that "being a virgin" sh!t.

[hidingwithmusic]

Its also electrical damage to your brain, that's why it's the last resort.

There is a miscers who did work with an ect doctor and he said that his boss told him if he was severely depressed, he'd go straight for the ect

[veggie530]

I've had depression since I was 13-14 years old, a few years after being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I was homeschooled all my life and didn't have much social interaction until I was 13 and got into martial arts (saved my life). A positive of this experience is a vivid imagination (always "pretending") since childhood and an ability to cope by myself.

Parents are very controlling, and only over the last couple years did they finally relax now that my sister and I are both grown and out of the house. They're more controlling/judgmental of her, and I've noticed it drives something inside of us to do the things they would have something to say about just to show we'll be all right anyway. Odd motivation, but it's palpable. They're great people, btw -- just the way they turned out.

I haven't been continuously depressed since I was a teen. Just something conjured up a depressed spirit -- I'd actually call it more of a melancholy understanding of the world -- that comes and goes. Sometimes it comes and goes hourly, daily, or weekly. When I started working nights it got way worse -- I'd be awake at 0200 thinking about how life is so short, how everyone is just marching toward an inevitable end and this life is so pointless in the grand scheme of things.

I'm in the health care field (RN) and I hate self-diagnosing, but I've noticed I seem to match up with both narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and bipolar type II pretty well. I was clinically diagnosed with depression at the age of 17 and the doctor mentioned further assessment for bipolar type 2 was necessary, but I never returned. I think the NPD might not really be NPD, but might be more of a defense mechanism to the constant strain of depression I feel. I do have a considerable lack of empathy (see: 0) for anyone outside of my immediate family, so who knows. I live with it.

The odd thing is, if you asked anybody that knows me, they'd say I was probably the happiest person around, always positive, always getting **** done. I don't know how else to cope other than always joking and making people laugh and pursuing goals to the point of maniacal obsession to distract myself from the feelings that I don't want to deal with.

Sort of all over the place, but that's the gist of the story.

we gonna make it, brahs.

[RapierApe]

I used to be depressed. My advice would be if you can't face professional help, look to your good bros.

Early 20's I felt like didn't know what to do with my life, wasted some opportunities that seemed to matter at the time, didn't think anyone should find me attractive, kind of brought that insecure mentality into a long term relationship and was definitely to it's detriment.

Over time, I've gotten to a place where I'm confident and happy. I don't think I've taken any particular action to get here, so fairly lucky I suppose. But there's been a few times talking with a few mates about the topic since, and I'd surprised that others had been through similar feelings... Suicidal thoughts, cutting, violent outbursts, crying when alone, whatever... But we didn't talk about it at the time as we felt like it was something to be embarrassed about (though in hindsight it became clear it's not).

Not all my mates have experienced it, but those that didn't wished they'd known we were struggling. We all want to be there for people we care about, I guess.


So a few of us went through dark days alone because of embarrassment. I know it's hard, but try to be open with those close to you about what you're facing. If not for you, you never know, you might be doing a mate who is hiding problems just as big as yours a massive favour by raising the subject.

[IcemanIsDead]

on therapy...I've been going for the past 5 years. nothing has changed. I still feel the same.

and I don't like taking medications because often they make me feel like a zombie.

Have you ever tried meds for longer periods of time (over 2 months at a time)?

The first month or so is always hard, that's when you literally just sit and stare or sleep and feel like chit in general..

One thing I've found that's helped me in the last few years is to maintain a really close relationship with my parents. I go cycling with my dad every Saturday and go eat dinner with my mom once a week as well. It helps to be reminded often that they are there for you, even if they can be annoying at times lol. I know that's not always an option for everyone though.

...

Another thing I've found is that talking about it definitely helps. Just writing out these two posts has made me feel a ton better even though it really doesn't amount to much besides rambling to strangers lol.

It doesn't really feel like an option to me, seeing my parents that is..

I can't stand being around them, my mother have called me mentally handicapped more than once, she thinks I have Aspergers/autism. Nobody else that I have ever interacted with thinks that of me, only her. My father has called me a coward because I told him that I wanted to go to Afghanistan but didn't want to come home in a casket.

I agree with you that it feels good to vent, even to complete strangers, I think that it's actually easier because you don't know the people that are reading this. I wouldn't share this with my friends tbh, I'm always putting up a front. Sometimes they know what's up, but none of them know just how broken I really am..

Chit childhood
Fa
Beta
Virgin
I dont know what to do with my life, I have absolutely no hope that I'll make it.
Dont think I'll live before I see my 20's

F*ck calling yourself beta, alpha/beta isn't really used correctly on the misc. Don't worry about being a virgin, I have 2 rather hot chick friends that lost their virginity at 19 and 20, it's not a sign of being a loser/beta, it's just that there hasn't come an opportunity yet, which is fine.

[AppsBrah]

In. Never give up brahs.

[poseidon511]

Them antidepressants got me fat,went from 160lbs to 265lbs very rapidly. But at least they work i can tell you that. Been feeling bad lately,i got nothing going for me,I'm not in school and do not have a high school diploma yet. Been feeling just a little suicidal lately,only thing keeping me going is my imagination and the desire to get buff,i want to be big(not fat big like i am now)but lean buff just to get bishes,i know i'm doing it for the wrong reason but its all i got.

[H1A1]

Yea wrong forum to even try and ask for help, Shouldve made a thread called How to increase Facial Aesthetics

[poseidon511]

Yea wrong forum to even try and ask for help, Shouldve made a thread called How to increase Facial Aesthetics

Why did you delete what you wrote,we care here and can try and give you some advice.

[Nebis]

what are some good self help videos? will rep

[Todoslocos]

what are some good self help videos? will rep

srs fawk self help it only makes you addicted...






to self help

[IcemanIsDead]

Them antidepressants got me fat,went from 160lbs to 265lbs very rapidly. But at least they work i can tell you that. Been feeling bad lately,i got nothing going for me,I'm not in school and do not have a high school diploma yet. Been feeling just a little suicidal lately,only thing keeping me going is my imagination and the desire to get buff,i want to be big(not fat big like i am now)but lean buff just to get bishes,i know i'm doing it for the wrong reason but its all i got.

Did you check your thyroid? I watched a Bios3 vid where he talked about the fact that the thyroid can malfunction slightly when on antidepressants, and that can be fixed by supplementing with T3, which is a thyroid hormone..

You seeing a therapist or something like that? It's always good to have someone to talk to.

Yea wrong forum to even try and ask for help, Shouldve made a thread called How to increase Facial Aesthetics

Why do you feel that way? ITT we are looking to help each other!

[quitlifting]

Born Muslim

Became Atheist at 12

apathy clouds my mind

don't see point of life

not fa but feel no one understands me/friends would drop me if i exposed my insecurities

need someone to talk to

going down medication route now

[quitlifting]

Chit childhood
Fa
Beta
Virgin
I dont know what to do with my life, I have absolutely no hope that I'll make it.
Dont think I'll live before I see my 20's

volkan?

turkish brah?

[poseidon511]

Did you check your thyroid? I watched a Bios3 vid where he talked about the fact that the thyroid can malfunction slightly when on antidepressants, and that can be fixed by supplementing with T3, which is a thyroid hormone..

You seeing a therapist or something like that? It's always good to have someone to talk to.

Yeah,i see a therapist/psychiatrist and a doctor who both work together to help me.The doctor,she's in charge of my medication and i occasionally talk to her about life but the psychiatrist is the main person i talk to about life.I feel like such a burden to her,feels like i bore her by talking about my life even though she says im her favorite she's ever worked with and she jokes that im her adoptive son so i guess i mean a lot to her personally.It makes me feel good but still feel like i waste her time. I dont know about the thyroid thing i never heard of that.

[AppsBrah]

Yeah,i see a therapist/psychiatrist and a doctor who both work together to help me.The doctor,she's in charge of my medication and i occasionally talk to her about life but the psychiatrist is the main person i talk to about life.I feel like such a burden to her,feels like i bore her by talking about my life even though she says im her favorite she's ever worked with and she jokes that im her adoptive son so i guess i mean a lot to her personally.It makes me feel good but still feel like i waste her time. I dont know about the thyroid thing i never heard of that.

u wot m8

No hate and I'm glad that it helps you but that sounds like she's crossing some serious professional borders there.