Every day I am in a challenge with the human spirit

[schroeds]

Thanks to this forum, I am motivated. So thank you all. I know this will be TLDR for most - but fack it. Look for the question marks {?} if you just want to answer some questions without the boring story.


A few open questions for the very fit. And by very fit I am generally speaking of those with 10% or less body fat.

{?} What does it feel like, and what is it like to be fit? As a guy shooting for that BF% (and still way off).

{?} When you're fit - and on a maintenance do you feel less challenged than when you're under maintenance?

I picture it as feeling great - waking up with confidence, and just knowing you're healthy would make you happy. Kind of like the opposite of that feeling you get 20 min. after eating a tub of ice cream (where, as one who has done that before, feels like a total waste of humanity, depressed, and less confident).

I started a new lifestyle in Oct 2013. I told myself that I wasn't going to start lifting weights or anything yet. Just keep to my existing exercises and modify my diet. My first goal was to challenge myself to do something I felt was impossible. Something easy to say, but really tough to keep with - I challenged myself to change my life in one small way - and then when it became second nature to me, I would move on to the next step. For me, it was pretty drastic. I told myself I wouldn't eat lunch at work ever again. I work in a cube-farm - with dozens of average people - who all eat out every single day. My group of friends go out to random places to eat random junk food, they pay $10-$25 depending on where they go, and it was just a social eating trap that I had become used to.

One day I just said "Sorry, I'm out". I have since only eaten lunch with co-workers on occasions where I absolutely had to (lunch with CEO etc.).

{?}Anyone else work a 9-5 job who feel the daily lunch is a social eating trap?

At first it was tough - they are all going to eat these insane lunches - pizza, subs, meatballs, everything you could wish for. One day where I felt I had to eat because of my fear for social awkwardness - I broke down and took a big slice of pizza. The place we got pizza from was a gross eatery who sells huge pizzas for dirt cheap. The thing was so disgustingly big it covered my entire paper plate. I picked part of it up -and took a bite, and realized it tasted terrible - like a horrible wet- paper towel with a disgusting mess of over-salty meats, and unsavory cheese. I know it probably sounds good (pizza)- but I'm glad they got pizza from this place, because I think they exorcized any desire to ever eat pizza out of me.

To this day, I've only had about 3 lunches since October (all due to company lunch meetings).

{?}If you end up in these work situations where you're expected to take a seat and eat with your boss' boss - and you had planned to have X meal - how do you do it? Do you just not eat the food, and make an explanation?


It was tough to say no on countless company-sponsored lunches. Pizza everywhere - seems there's a free lunch every week in this place. People also bring in food and leave it on the counter in the kitchen with a sign "feel free". Sometimes it's followed up with an email "X brought in some doughnuts, help yourselves" -wtf is wrong with these animals. They're all trying to make each other fat, and it's working.

In the months that followed, I decided: I will not eat anything at work. Someone brings in the doughnuts, fack it - I'm out. Free sandwiches from a lunch meeting - no thanks. Free cookies, free chocolates, treats, etc. None - not one bite. I haven't once eaten anything anyone has brought in since early Oct.

A few months later - I decided: No more beer. Just none. Never - I'm done with drinking beer. I wasn't a big beer drinker to begin with. A few here and there with dinner, and I certainly enjoyed them, but I was just drinking for no major reason. Something I figured I can live without. So the beer is out - been completely without for about three months - not long I know -but I'm taking baby steps.


I've now gone almost 10 months without eating lunch with anyone at work - and not eating any of their junk food. It's in my blood. Did I lose weight over these 10 months? Not a lot - just about 10lbs. Everything else being equal - I basically lost 10lbs. I've eaten my own food - on my own time, and that alone has helped.

Overall, my strategy is to change one small thing at a time (though drastic it may be). Instead of biting too much off at once (like quitting beer, quitting the work food, and starting a big workout plan etc...) doing one thing at a time has helped make it last.

It's almost a joke now in the office. Everyone knows I don't want food. The other day a dude was going around with a box of ice-cream sandwiches because it was hot out- and without even thinking of it - he walked up to a group of 3 people (myself included) and asked the other two if they wanted one - and didn't ask me. We didn't even laugh about it - it's just a fact - I don't eat food at work.

FYI I brought my own banana and protein shake every single day - or had my shake before work, or after work. Some days (not to say this is healthy or not) i'd just not eat anything. On those days - in the first few months - I got very hungry. Hell, I'm hungry on days I DO have my shake. It was more important to me to stick to my guns than it was to eat a proper lunch. Later, a few months later, I grew to be comfortable in a 'hunger state'. Basically what I call being ultimately hungry.

I'm sure many of you know what it's like to be hungry. like really hungry. The great thing about hunger though is you can only get so hungry. It's not infinite. If you have a hunger rating of 1-10 - 10 being the hungriest, there is no 11. I never knew this until my plan was put in place.

Some might question why such drastic moves. Well - I was a slave to food. I would eat a lot- and whenever I wanted. I could eat 10 meals in a day and still be ready for more. I felt that food had a hold on me, and I needed to prove to myself that in a state of ultimate hunger, I was capable of pushing myself to make a good choice. Without will power, and discipline you can't achieve much. What sense is there in starting a big workout routine if you don't have the will power and discipline to carry on.

1 month ago- I decided I was ready for the next step. Diet. I have since moved to learning about how best to feed my body - in order to lower my body fat. I have been learning about what my macros should be. What foods fit those macros. What amount of calories under my macro I want to be at in order to start losing weight, and the crazy thing is that it started to work right away.

As I stated, over the 10 months of no work-food - I lost about 10lbs. (Not having changed any of my other bad habbits of over-eating, drinking until recently etc.).

Now that I feel I have the discipline and will power to fight the food - I feel I am ready to change my diet.

Ultimately - and I hope I get there - I want to keep a diet plan as disciplined and steady as the previous choices I've made. Once I feel that is steady, I'll be introducing a lifting schedule. I don't even have a gym membership yet. My goal at this early stage of planning is to some day get a home gym going - starting with the gear to do 5x5 Stronglifts.

I've barely scratched the surface on my ultimate goals - but this forum has helped me a lot- so I wanted to finally post something out here.

background: I grew up playing hockey and soccer very actively- like every-day-and-twice-on-sundays-actively. I tried to get a scholarship to a D1 school for hockey and failed. I dropped out - quit sports, grew from 5'8" - 175lbs at age 18 to 235lbs at age 20. I'm now in my 30's (33) and see that I wasted my entire 20's being obese. Mid-20's I started playing hockey again. dropped some weight from that, by late 20's I ramped up my playing to 2-3 times per week. Again, I was just a fatter version of that 18-year old one-time-super-star. Got down to 215lbs with some dieting in 2008. Kept it down - went on another diet a year or two later to get to 200lbs. In October of last year I was 15 years removed from a frame that I felt happy in.

My goal is to get to 10% body fat. I'm so realistic about my goal that I don't even know what my current body fat is. Slow baby steps.

{?} Final question for now: It is a daily grind. Every day it is tough. Every day I want to eat cake. Every day I feel hunger... and Pain. Every day I struggle. Gaining weight took me just a few short years. Every day I am in a challenge with the human spirit

I know it's going to take more years -but how do you get through the moment in the day where you're existence is being challenged?