De-motivated by gym

[nimbus456]

Guys and gal's!

I have a bit of a rant to go on here:

I've started going to a gym today, after working out at home for a good year or two, with my own weights.
Seeing just how far behind other people at the gym when it comes to figures is completely demoralizing.
For example: I'll struggle to lift 20kg dumbbells, and the people around me will be swinging around twice that with ease.

Just seeing how much effort I've put in, only to be so far behind, sucks.

Can you guys offer any help as to how to get past this, and stay focused?

Cheers.

[DanLimitless]

Guys and gal's!

I have a bit of a rant to go on here:

I've started going to a gym today, after working out at home for a good year or two, with my own weights.
Seeing just how far behind other people at the gym when it comes to figures is completely demoralizing.
For example: I'll struggle to lift 20kg dumbbells, and the people around me will be swinging around twice that with ease.

Just seeing how much effort I've put in, only to be so far behind, sucks.

Can you guys offer any help as to how to get past this, and stay focused?

Cheers.

Those people who you are comparing yourself too have been through the same exact thing.

What they CHOSE was to carry on regardless and figure out whats best for them and be commited to learning the process.

On another note, you dont seem to value yourself. Why does lifting heavier weights make you better? It doesnt, I promise you. You are awesome as you are right now. Be commited to being happy, physical and healthy and things will turn out great for you.

[KingTut23]

Those people who you are comparing yourself too have been through the same exact thing.

What they CHOSE was to carry on regardless and figure out whats best for them and be commited to learning the process.

On another note, you dont seem to value yourself. Why does lifting heavier weights make you better? It doesnt, I promise you. You are awesome as you are right now. Be commited to being happy, physical and healthy and things will turn out great for you.

This, dont compare yourself to others bro just be the best that you can be, be a better person each time you look in the mirror.

[SeanM4]

Just concern yourself with lifting hard and with good form. That's the best thing you can do.

[ChangeOfStyle]

Guys and gal's!

I have a bit of a rant to go on here:

I've started going to a gym today, after working out at home for a good year or two, with my own weights.
Seeing just how far behind other people at the gym when it comes to figures is completely demoralizing.
For example: I'll struggle to lift 20kg dumbbells, and the people around me will be swinging around twice that with ease.

Just seeing how much effort I've put in, only to be so far behind, sucks.

Can you guys offer any help as to how to get past this, and stay focused?

Cheers.

Listen carefully mate,

Everyone has their own starting point and they build up and proceed on forward. Everyone who you see that is doing more weights then you started as a beginner (just as Dan said). You think those guys benching 200kg were able to do that as beginners? Nope, it took them time and effort to get to that standard and that's what you need to know.

Going to the gym and working out is something that should be personal. Something you do for yourself and stop looking around at what other people are doing and focus on what you are doing because that's the only way you're going to push yourself to get better and once you get better, you will handle higher weights with more reps. You start small and you proceed on forward to going big.

Don't worry mate, everyone starts off new. Keep it up, keep motivated and keep liftin

Best of luck

[ThaRoostah]

If you didn't do all that work at home you would be even further behind. Each day working out you get less behind. How far behind do you want to be? You're choice. You are already behind. You can change that. You can stay the same distance behind, get further behind or get closer. The only way you can get closer is to eat right and lift weights. Do you want it?

[Galactus]

I go to a commercial gym with several thousand members and am one of the strongest people there. I also on the weekends sometimes go to gyms that are further away, but are more specialized. One has a ton of retired pros and a guy who held almost all powerlifting records at one time, and the other is a strongman focused gym. At those gyms I'm middle of the pack to below average strength.

I don't get down being at those other gyms, in fact I'm MORE motivated there, as I'm the little fish in the big pond there instead of the big fish in the little pond at globogym.

If you showed up and where the biggest and strongest guy at the gym, why would you be motivated? You'd already be at the top!

[ConsiderPhlebus]

Unhappiness is comparing oneself to others. Focus on self-improvements and log your personal bests.

[dude846]

I remember doing a bench press with 2x 25 plates on either side. I was struggling.

This young girl comes beside me and puts on 45s and pushes out the reps like nothing. She wasn't she-hulk built, either.

Chest is one of the weakest areas for me, I realize this. But no matter what group I do, I also tend to push myself to the point of feeling sick.

[Dutchie1972]

Dude: you are only lifting for yourself, nobody cares what you lift and you shouldnt compare yourself to others. The only thing that is important is whether you are giving it your best shot every time you lift.

[yajsreym]

everyone starts the race at the beginning. keep it up and one day people will look at you and say, "Oh jeez, he can lift so much and I wish I could do half as much as him..."

[ZombieDeli]

Guys and gal's!

I have a bit of a rant to go on here:

I've started going to a gym today, after working out at home for a good year or two, with my own weights.
Seeing just how far behind other people at the gym when it comes to figures is completely demoralizing.
For example: I'll struggle to lift 20kg dumbbells, and the people around me will be swinging around twice that with ease.

Just seeing how much effort I've put in, only to be so far behind, sucks.

Can you guys offer any help as to how to get past this, and stay focused?

Cheers.

HI a few things

I dont give a chit what other people are lifting I am there for me

I keep a notebook and log my lifts. I go up 5-10 pounds or 1-2 reps whenever possible. I always listen to my body though; there are some days I cant hit the lifts I got last session and thats ok.

I use perfect form

I don't care about numbers. Numbers are great they are a lot of fun if you want to be a powerlifter. Being a bodybuilder is about controlling the movement, stretch and contract, time under tension and other concepts.

Lastly many of the males in the gym are on that extra supplement that the pros take if you catch my drift. This combined with never skipping sessions, eating like a horse, good genetics, always trying to go up a few pounds a session are why they are that strong. Don't get me wrong you can get extremely muscular and strong natural but when you see a guy in gym and he is dumbbell rowing 120 pounders with chit form its pretty obvious he has had some help. Not to crap on these people I mean its a myth that you jump on a supplement and suddenly gym is the easiest thing ever, but sometimes it does explain why you are looking around and people are jacked beyond reality.

[MXOH8]

Guys and gal's!

I have a bit of a rant to go on here:

I've started going to a gym today, after working out at home for a good year or two, with my own weights.
Seeing just how far behind other people at the gym when it comes to figures is completely demoralizing.
For example: I'll struggle to lift 20kg dumbbells, and the people around me will be swinging around twice that with ease.

Just seeing how much effort I've put in, only to be so far behind, sucks.

Can you guys offer any help as to how to get past this, and stay focused?

Cheers.

I know exactly where you're coming from. I've always been intimidated by going to the gym. In my head I imagined that everyone around me was snickering. Some meathead next to me curling 50lb DBs without breaking a sweat, and I'm hitting muscle failure with 15lbs. It kept me from ever going.
The two things that helped me were this:
1) I joined a city rec center. They have a first rate gym, but it's mostly seniors that attend. Needless to say, I have no problem going every day now. There's still a few young dudes throwing big weight around, but it's pretty easy to disregard one or two guys.
2) This one was key for me personally: I got so fed up with being overweight, uncomfortable, and out of shape that I finally said, " Screw this. Screw them. I'm doing this, I HAVE to do this".

I'm still at the beginning of my journey; I have a long way to go. But the bottom line is that it's MY journey. No one else's. When you hit the gym remember that. Don't look at anyone else. Don't compare yourself to anyone else. Don't compete with anyone but yourself. There's a Chinese proverb that says, "The wise man doesn't compete with anyone. Therefore no one can compete with him."

Hope that helps bro. Don't give up, and best of luck.

[FunkDaddy]

Why are those people lifting more than you or looking better than you? Because they put the work in. If seeing people further ahead than you kills your motivation instead of igniting it, you are in for a long, depressing life. Look at that person with the arms your admire or pushing the weight you wish you could and let it light a damn fire under your ass.

[nimbus456]

Woah!

I did not expect such a firey response from you all!
You've all made some great points. I really have to do it for myself - and not compare myself to people who have years of training on me.

I went again today, but I wasn't able to pull half as much as I normally do. This didn't stop me however, I ploughed on through and focused on building my core, until my stomach cramped and I was holding back the vomit. Even if I didn't come close to my 1MR, I did all I could. THIS is what it should be

You guys are great. :3

[siempreadelante]

Dude, for what it's worth, I started at the gym for the first time in my life back in January. I've only ever paid attention to my own stats, and have never even looked at what anyone else is lifting. It's totally irrelevant. One of the best quotes I ever read was 'don't compare your Chapter 1 to someone else's Chapter 24'. It's your story.

As it turns out, I had a session with a new trainer today, who was genuinely impressed with how much I could lift as a relative beginner. The recognition is nice, but at the end of the day, it's still irrelevant. The only important thing is that I - and you - constantly try to lift 5lbs more than last time.

[theFitNish]

This is all about longevity. Unfortunately it takes time, anything good does. So you just have to keep at it and never ever ever give up! everyone goes through those days or times where you just dont seem to be progressing and those ties are there to test you and to make you, make your will stronger. Just as your muscles need to be exercised so do things like your discipline, your willpower, your dedication. They have to be tested and exercised in order for them to become stronger. So just keep believing that each day you are moving closer and closer to what you want to become.

[sigastos]

Maybe you shold try street workout ?

[outdoorsofficer]

Every guy in the gym lifts more than me man. Just focus on what you're doing. Do good form. Mind your business, they'll mind theirs. Use them as motivation: keep working hard and consistent til you get to where they're at.

[AndyThompson]

You've got to start somewhere bro. Bust your ass every day, stay consistent and persistent and before you know it people who are in your exact same shoes will be looking at you asking themselves "How do I compete with that?" Just take it one day at a time and focus on being better than you were the day before. You'll get there my man.

[jack505]

Don't look at how much others are lifting shut yourself in your own little world. If they lift more than you than you might get demotivated, if they lift less you can also get demotivated by not challenging yourself.

[devilsrule61287]

You can't worry about what others are lifting. They have been playing this game longer than you have, and progress comes with time. They didn't get that strong overnight. Just focus on yourself and continuing your improvement. And to the extent you do consider what other people are lifting or what they are doing, use that as motivation, since it shows you that great things await you if you stick with it. I used to get all self-conscious and defensive when I saw big dudes lifting heavy weight. Then I told myself that I will become just like them, so long as I put in the time and effort.

I tried bench pressing with a total of 95 lbs when I walked into my gym the first time, and failed on my very first rep. Talk about embarassment, and wanting to disappear and never come back. But I sucked up my pride, started very light, and just worked my way up, image be damned. You can't reach an amazing finish if you don't form the building blocks.

[Ls1leadfoot]

one thing you might not realize is the dude swinging a 75lb er sees a GIANT come in and swing 125lb er and feels the SAME way you do !!!!!. Dont beat yourself up, everyone above made great points as well.
just keep chugging along

[MikeyLeMunch]

Just seeing how much effort I've put in, only to be so far behind, sucks.

Always remember: don't compare yourself to others.
Everyone started at zero. What you see is their progress.
Keep at it and you'll be doing the same, others looking at you with a distraught expression.

[xxmaxmusclexx]

Comparison is the thief of joy.
Look in the mirror... that's your competition. Just do YOU, work from the bottom up, lift what you can until you can lift more. PERIOD.
Now go get em and be the BOSS YOU ARE.

[coldpulse]

Don't think about what others think of you. Just be yourself. You should be fine and get back in it within a few visits at the gym.