How to avoid getting cheated/have a good relationship (gtfih insecure brahs) (long)

[PointBreak85]

Yeah but they didnt last

[Caxoo]

Agree with everything except 4, there is no need to purposely think about and do stuff like that, and if there is a need then your relationship was probably not meant to be anything but a casual one anyway

[7Humz7]

Good info op albeit a bit obvious

[MillerDecaXC]

If you genuinely believe that you fuked up by not spending enough time with her, you should sit her down and tell her that first. Then tell her that you want to try again and change 'xyz' in the relationship to make it better than last time round, if that makes sense.

I may have misunderstood the situation though; could you elaborate on why you broke up with her?

I just broke up with her because we were seeing each other once a month, one time once in 2 months... I couldnt get her to see me no matter how hard I tried, she would always make up excuses or something would "come up" last minute, etc. after 5-6 months of this I figured it was going to be like this forever and i couldnt fix things if i couldnt see her, so no point in staying in the relationship and maybe breaking up with her would switch things up and knock something loose.

[sallgoodbaby]

I just broke up with her because we were seeing each other once a month, one time once in 2 months... I couldnt get her to see me no matter how hard I tried, she would always make up excuses or something would "come up" last minute, etc. after 5-6 months of this I figured it was going to be like this forever and i couldnt fix things if i couldnt see her, so no point in staying in the relationship and maybe breaking up with her would switch things up and knock something loose.

Hit me right in the feels brah.....

[jwlee7ucla]

While you make some good points, it is hard to take you at face value because you said it yourself- you've never been cheated on. This could easily be because you just happened to pick a girl that won't cheat from the getgo, so no matter what you did it wouldn't really matter. It is hard to understand the cheated mindset without having experienced it yourself. That said, I went from being cheated on heavily, to never being cheated on because of changes I've made to my life.

It is definitely a long road, and the most obvious things are the ones people won't listen to.

[rb1413]

Agree with everything except 4, there is no need to purposely think about and do stuff like that, and if there is a need then your relationship was probably not meant to be anything but a casual one anyway

If you are truly an alpha guy you will end up doing this naturally (but its not a bad thing to be aware of it), but if you are like the stereotypical misc nice guy you won't be thinking about it, and you should.

If you're doing fine without it then obviously don't go out your way to change anything

[rb1413]

I just broke up with her because we were seeing each other once a month, one time once in 2 months... I couldnt get her to see me no matter how hard I tried, she would always make up excuses or something would "come up" last minute, etc. after 5-6 months of this I figured it was going to be like this forever and i couldnt fix things if i couldnt see her, so no point in staying in the relationship and maybe breaking up with her would switch things up and knock something loose.

Ohh yeah that's what I thought, I wasn't sure if she was making excuses to see you or excuses not to see you.

How do you know that she's super sad now that you're gone, man? You weren't exactly there before.

If you want her back tell her, but you need to start developing yourself outside your relationship because usually the girl will be the one asking to spend time together. You're working 70 hours a week and training, and she can't make time 1 night a week to see you? Bull****.

What I would do in this situation (not telling you to necessarily do this, but this is what I would do) is that I would ask her to get back together with me. If she doesn't, cool, deal with the breakup. If she does, and continues to act the same, I would start going out and meeting new girls and focus on dating them behind her back, while continuing to hook up with her once a month.

From there on, I don't care whether she stays, changes, leaves, cheats, whatever.

[rb1413]

While you make some good points, it is hard to take you at face value because you said it yourself- you've never been cheated on. This could easily be because you just happened to pick a girl that won't cheat from the getgo, so no matter what you did it wouldn't really matter. It is hard to understand the cheated mindset without having experienced it yourself. That said, I went from being cheated on heavily, to never being cheated on because of changes I've made to my life.

It is definitely a long road, and the most obvious things are the ones people won't listen to.

All good points you have brought up, have my measlies.

It's very true that I've picked girls who are cool, that is part of my advice. However you guys are putting too much emphasis on finding the right girl; FOR THE RIGHT GUY, she will be 100% loyal. You have to be so valuable to her that she wouldn't dare even think about doing anything with another guy, and isn't even motivated to find another guy. Do you think that Leo DiCaprio's girl (whoever it is at the moment) or Beyonce would cheat on their respective men?

Granted, those men have good looks and/or money/celebrity status, but for a regular girl it's pretty easy to become just as valuable to her.

[rb1413]

Good info op albeit a bit obvious

Not for a lot of the misc

[jimbob007]

Keep them away from da hood.

[rb1413]

Keep them away from da hood.

This too.

mirin the sig btw

[jamsoolee]

Really good stuff here, repped.

[PointBreak85]

I see it as


- be an awesome guy to her, treat her well, love her etc be " beta"

-when she steps out of bounds you lay the hammer

[MillerDecaXC]

Ohh yeah that's what I thought, I wasn't sure if she was making excuses to see you or excuses not to see you.

How do you know that she's super sad now that you're gone, man? You weren't exactly there before.

If you want her back tell her, but you need to start developing yourself outside your relationship because usually the girl will be the one asking to spend time together. You're working 70 hours a week and training, and she can't make time 1 night a week to see you? Bull****.

What I would do in this situation (not telling you to necessarily do this, but this is what I would do) is that I would ask her to get back together with me. If she doesn't, cool, deal with the breakup. If she does, and continues to act the same, I would start going out and meeting new girls and focus on dating them behind her back, while continuing to hook up with her once a month.

From there on, I don't care whether she stays, changes, leaves, cheats, whatever.

She tells me shes upset, and she texts me all the time still

I am developed outside the relationship. Ive been going out with the boys, had 2 easy smashes that I turned down actually, but ive told her "ive been going out with friends but im acting as if i had a gf, id feel really bad if we got back together soon and i messed around with another girl, ive had to reject a few so far." which is mostly true, i flirt here and there, and ive made out with 2 girls, but no sex. i turned down this solid 7/10 who asked if I could "take her home in the morning"... and also turned down a girl who blatantly told me she could deepthroat (kept her # tho lol). my friends wanted to kick my ass... willpower of the gods bros, willpower of the gods.

she is suppose to come over after work today but its already looking like she is flaking, big surprise. i texted her at 12:30, no response 3 hours later and she gets off in an hour.

She also invited me out for her birthday next weekend... should I wait and goto that before i ask if she wants to get back together? or ask before that?

[rb1413]

She tells me shes upset, and she texts me all the time still

I am developed outside the relationship. Ive been going out with the boys, had 2 easy smashes that I turned down actually, but ive told her "ive been going out with friends but im acting as if i had a gf, id feel really bad if we got back together soon and i messed around with another girl, ive had to reject a few so far." which is mostly true, i flirt here and there, and ive made out with 2 girls, but no sex. i turned down this solid 7/10 who asked if I could "take her home in the morning"... and also turned down a girl who blatantly told me she could deepthroat (kept her # tho lol). my friends wanted to kick my ass... willpower of the gods bros, willpower of the gods.

she is suppose to come over after work today but its already looking like she is flaking, big surprise. i texted her at 12:30, no response 3 hours later and she gets off in an hour.

She also invited me out for her birthday next weekend... should I wait and goto that before i ask if she wants to get back together? or ask before that?

Yeah man go to that and then talk with her afterwards; tell her you want her back, and what she's doing that you don't like call her out on her chit. Good to hear you haven't ****ed up the rest of your life.

willpower of the gods? Why are you acting as if you are taken??? No harm in having a little fun while you are single lol id recommend you go for it

I'd take a good look at how this girl is treating you though she obviously doesn't respect your time, even though she does seem to care a lot about you

good luck with everything bro hope it works out

[rb1413]

I see it as


- be an awesome guy to her, treat her well, love her etc be " beta"

-when she steps out of bounds you lay the hammer

sort of, but I wouldn't really call it 'beta' just being a good boyfriend. would also add part about having a lot going on outside of her.

[poppycock101]

OP actually knows what he's talking about. I'm shocked I read something like this on the misc. Repped.

\

this

came in expecting:

1) have brad pitt facial aesthetics, anything under you might as well off yourself now.
2) make at least 500k a year
3) be at least 6ft2 with zyzz aesthetics


i'm impressed OP

we could use more chit like this on the misc.

[Mwizzle]

Chit should be stickied, but OP I have a question for you seeing as you're a brown brah. I know the misc likes to **** around a lot with Indians and seeing as how they're the least desired, how has your interactions with girls in real life correlate to this? Anything you do to give you an edge?

And how did you learn all this stuff, by experience?

[Jizzuz]

Chit should be stickied, but OP I have a question for you seeing as you're a brown brah. I know the misc likes to **** around a lot with Indians and seeing as how they're the least desired, how has your interactions with girls in real life correlate to this? Anything you do to give you an edge?

And how did you learn all this stuff, by experience?

This. I was wondering the same thing.

[S_P_Q_R]

She tells me shes upset, and she texts me all the time still

I am developed outside the relationship. Ive been going out with the boys, had 2 easy smashes that I turned down actually, but ive told her "ive been going out with friends but im acting as if i had a gf, id feel really bad if we got back together soon and i messed around with another girl, ive had to reject a few so far." which is mostly true, i flirt here and there, and ive made out with 2 girls, but no sex. i turned down this solid 7/10 who asked if I could "take her home in the morning"... and also turned down a girl who blatantly told me she could deepthroat (kept her # tho lol). my friends wanted to kick my ass... willpower of the gods bros, willpower of the gods.

she is suppose to come over after work today but its already looking like she is flaking, big surprise. i texted her at 12:30, no response 3 hours later and she gets off in an hour.

She also invited me out for her birthday next weekend... should I wait and goto that before i ask if she wants to get back together? or ask before that?

Honestly, if she keeps flaking then you need to tell her that she needs to grow up and then cut all contact and be done with it..... No point pursuing something that doesn't really feel the same about you.

[rb1413]

Chit should be stickied, but OP I have a question for you seeing as you're a brown brah. I know the misc likes to **** around a lot with Indians and seeing as how they're the least desired, how has your interactions with girls in real life correlate to this? Anything you do to give you an edge?

And how did you learn all this stuff, by experience?

How did I get confident? I don't accept the limitations that others place on me - when I was younger I was extremely depressed as I thought that I couldn't get cute girls, but luckily it was a combination of finding success with women material online, experience, and simply deciding not to give a ****. I was such a horny little tenth grader that when I saw even the tiniest possibility I could get a girlfriend I was immediately open to it.

I also am not a loser; if I didn't tell you I was indian, you wouldn't know online, because I am not insecure about it. Same thing with being a manlet. In high school I was a four year varsity rugby athlete, and don't speak with an indian accent because I grew up in international schools (english is my first language). Also, in my high school, there were 1 or 2 indian guys who did get a lot of pussy; particularly with Australian girls, who I thought were naturally the most racist, so I realized (much like neo in the matrix when he realizes he's been lied to) that some of the stuff I read online was in fact true.

Most of the girls I meet actually tell me they like brown guys better, even though most of the guys they've phucked are white, so I've brainwashed myself to actually think being an indian is an advantage if you take care of your hygiene (else you're screwed lol).

As for the specific dating stuff as I said, i read the stuff online and implemented it in my relationships, although not right away. I got crucified by my first gf in that she did a lot of things that hurt me (repeatedly dumped me), and I always blamed it on her, but then I realized that I was just being really needy. Stopped being needy, and then she started acting in a much better way for me, although by then I didn't care. So it was learning the knowledge, getting phucked over for not using it, and then actively going about implementing what I had learnt.

Bottom line if you want anything in life you have to go after it; no one is going to give you ****.

[rb1413]

\

this

came in expecting:

1) have brad pitt facial aesthetics, anything under you might as well off yourself now.
2) make at least 500k a year
3) be at least 6ft2 with zyzz aesthetics


i'm impressed OP

we could use more chit like this on the misc.

thanks man appreciate it

[rotatoo]

If you guys think cheating is logical then you dont know women



edit: its the misc what am I saying lols

[GetBigBrah]

Good points srs

[doworkson35]

Valid points, but I don't wanna remember all these "guidelines"
Rather wing it, if she wanna leave FINE
I can have 7 mothaphuckas like her, she will never find a mothaphucka like me

[Starkdragon]

very good thread, and props to you Miller, good luck, that chit deserves it's own thread for your story and how it turns out

genius OP, solid advice there. I have a gf who i've been dating for 2 years, very happy with her - get on great with her family, she spoils me like hell, is loyal as hell and we have loads of fun together. only downside is that she doesn't get on with my family very well, my parents think they're fully welcoming to her and that she always gets her own way and is rude to her, and my gf thinks the opposite. sadtimes, no idea how to improve the situation. i get her to come in and talk to them politely, and am sure that itll improve if that's done enough, but she gets irritated and becomes reluctant to bother because they'll often blank her or something like that due to being annoyed with her before, and then if she slips up they say she was rude when they were welcoming again.

****tyfamily-gfsituation/10

[CodyLee1337]

If she can't stick to her word, or show up when she says she will she's not worth your time. People do what they value with thier time and currently your value seems to be very low. Considering she only sees you 2x a month. Move on.

Also a girl who is insecure/doesn't love herself will not change because of you. Don't date these girls, self love and self respect are so important for a guy and a girl

[HelloLadies]

b-b-but

[rb1413]

thanks once again for the kind words/reps. I'm blocking the misc from my computer as I spend too much time on here and school starts soon, but will be back to periodically check. feel free to ask any questions too when I do log in i will be happy to answer anything.