Gym shyness and other annoyances

[elietto92]

Im not naturally a shy person, i'd consider myself loud and active when it comes to going out, but when it comes to fitness, I'm generally shy and unable to fulfill my full potential.

Like when I am working out, I am constantly looking around to see if anyones laughing at me or my workouts. This grows over my confidence and unable to fulfill my daily fitness routines.

This has always been with me since I was a little kid where i was really overweight and sports classes were not my thing. I couldn't throw a ball, or even throw a punch and people would always laugh at me back then and that shyness reoccurring memory still grows on me still today.

Has anyone ever felt like this? What did you do to combat this?

Also (really nooby question) what suggestions do people have when they struggle with their last rep? I hate when I am nearly done and struggle to get through which ruins everything. Do I try and give up or what?

Im new to all of this so please be nice.

[Wrench7]

Im not naturally a shy person, i'd consider myself loud and active when it comes to going out, but when it comes to fitness, I'm generally shy and unable to fulfill my full potential.

Like when I am working out, I am constantly looking around to see if anyones laughing at me or my workouts. This grows over my confidence and unable to fulfill my daily fitness routines.

This has always been with me since I was a little kid where i was really overweight and sports classes were not my thing. I couldn't throw a ball, or even throw a punch and people would always laugh at me back then and that shyness reoccurring memory still grows on me still today.

Has anyone ever felt like this? What did you do to combat this?

Also (really nooby question) what suggestions do people have when they struggle with their last rep? I hate when I am nearly done and struggle to get through which ruins everything. Do I try and give up or what?

Im new to all of this so please be nice.

A lot of people are insecure at some point in their lives. One thing that might help is find a fitness plan and follow it as close as you can. Just focus on yourself and the hell with everyone else.

I use to be nervous in the gym as well but now I find myself working out a hell of a lot harder then most of the others. You got this bro


When it comes to your last set have you tried to drop the weight? Drop it 5-10 pounds and you'll be able to knock it. I drop weight all the time so I can keep working out after I burnt out

[OfficerJimLahey]

In the time I've spent training which is quite a few different gyms I've never seen anyone openly laughing at anyone. This encompasses a lot of different people....those that are new, very out of shape, etc. I would focus on what you need to do and go with it.

Your last rep should be a struggle, you're doing it right!

Keep training hard man.

[mh22]

-put headphones on
-ignore and don't look or talk to anyone
-focus on your workout
-push yourself and work hard while drinking lots of water
-shower
-go home

Has been working for me for years.

[Badgerpoop]

In the time I've spent training which is quite a few different gyms I've never seen anyone openly laughing at anyone. This encompasses a lot of different people....those that are new, very out of shape, etc. I would focus on what you need to do and go with it.

Your last rep should be a struggle, you're doing it right!

Keep training hard man.

-put headphones on
-ignore and don't look or talk to anyone
-focus on your workout
-push yourself and work hard while drinking lots of water
-shower
-go home

Has been working for me for years.

These

[ACSZZ1988]

Fuk everyone else. You'll never see them out side of the gym anyway. Do not let someone else ruin your potential gains bro. Work hard don't bother anyone else you'll be fine. In my experience no one else really cares what you're doing

[CheeseAndToaste]

Its gym etiquette not to openly judge anyone in the gym. If I saw someone openly judging someone else in the gym, me and that person would have a problem.
Don't worry about it OP, just focus on yourself and your workout.

Unless someone is pushing MAD weight, no one cares what anyone else does in the gym.

A saying I heard once that stuck with me:

You can laugh at a fat person at McDonalds, but its never okay to laugh at a fat person in the gym.

Everyone starts somewhere.

[FlyWeightPhenXX]

Im not naturally a shy person, i'd consider myself loud and active when it comes to going out, but when it comes to fitness, I'm generally shy and unable to fulfill my full potential.

Like when I am working out, I am constantly looking around to see if anyones laughing at me or my workouts. This grows over my confidence and unable to fulfill my daily fitness routines.

This has always been with me since I was a little kid where i was really overweight and sports classes were not my thing. I couldn't throw a ball, or even throw a punch and people would always laugh at me back then and that shyness reoccurring memory still grows on me still today.

Has anyone ever felt like this? What did you do to combat this?

Also (really nooby question) what suggestions do people have when they struggle with their last rep? I hate when I am nearly done and struggle to get through which ruins everything. Do I try and give up or what?

Im new to all of this so please be nice.

welcome elietto92

Gym shyness is a big problem to why I don't join a gym despite my appearance (people tell me I look like I belong in a gym)
I think if you feel that if you feel motivated in the gym environment by all means try to make attempts to adapt
I agree it's because of social pressures on what guys are expected to do rather than what they can do.

I'd say if you like mantras get yourself a mantra to do when you feel like you're caving in (I become my own bootcamp yelling at myself.). Because I don't have a lot of extra energy to spare I usually don't max out unless I have NOTHING to do the next day. I find that when I do max out I become laggy and forgetful and it's not good since I have limited resources and time to begin with.

Think sensibly and think of your pros and cons. It's great that with your history you decide you want to get fit and become the better you, fighting off disease and living a more healthy life. And if you have a goal by a certain time but don't reach it, as long as you get there eventually. I promise that you'll face disappointments but it's about working towards your goals and not feeling the bitter rebound of the set back.

If you're struggling lol give yourself a minute sounds like you're under a bit of anxiety? if that's right find something that works for you; I sometimes stretch in between reps and I stretch before and after to really get that grounded feeling (but then again I work out in the comfort of my cave).

find what works for you, build on it, it doesn't happen overnight (patience is a b*****) and give yourself the mental space.

[BaconEggs]

Usually the only people that look at other people all the time are those skinny idiots that don't even lift. The big guys are usually focused on their own workout and they can even help you out sometimes while your benching etc.

[iJ0]

figure out what you want to do before you go- write it down.

make sure you have enough stuff you can rotate around an exercise if the curl-bro's are holding up one piece of equipment.

put head phones in... .go in and do the work out.

easy peasy lemon squuezy

[rossmcd87]

Im not naturally a shy person, i'd consider myself loud and active when it comes to going out, but when it comes to fitness, I'm generally shy and unable to fulfill my full potential.

It all comes down to confidence in the end of the day.

The way I look at it, if you are committed & following a solid workout program, then you have no reason not to be. Why? You might not be lifting as much as some other gym goers but you'll know that unlike 90% of people in your gym (unless you frequent a pro gym), you will be training smart & over time will make more progress than they ever will. With this knowledge you should then make sure not to let your ego get in the way - the gym isn't a competition, you should lift weights that are suited to your level of ability.

It's a state of mind. If you are fully committed & truly believe that you can reach your fitness goals, then you will find yourself worrying less about what others think.

Also, try keeping a workout log. That will give you a boost being able to track your progress helping with your confidence more.

Also (really nooby question) what suggestions do people have when they struggle with their last rep? I hate when I am nearly done and struggle to get through which ruins everything. Do I try and give up or what?

Some people do train to failure but personally I always train such that I am around 2 reps short of failure on my last rep. If you want to train until failure, then don't be scared of not completing your last rep...otherwise it wouldn't be to failure! Just make sure you have a spotter if needed.

[MikeJHall]

Just completely concentrate on yourself from the moment you enter the gym. Go through your routine, do whatever it takes to get focused. Listen to some music that absorbs you and remember, everyone else is there and doing it for themselves - there's no reason whatsoever why you should deny yourself the same. You deserve it.

[TiberiusClaudis]

You know those big guys that you think are judging you? Try something...go over to one of them and ask them for a few pointers. 9 times out of 10, they will be glad to provide some insights. And after talking to them a bit, you will see that they are "normal" and from that point on, they will no longer be strangers.

Unless someone is HUGE and/or putting up incredible weights, for the most part, people are in their own zone and don't really care what other people are doing. Well, except if a cute girl walks by. LOL

Regarding the last rep, yes, you need to go for it, as that is a major part of reaching full muscle failure, which tears the muscles and makes it grow. Now saying that, it should be in good form and make sure you're safe doing it. For example, on dumbell curls, you can use your other hand to help bring the weight up. But for bench, you'd want to have a spotter there for that last rep or two.

Main thing is...keep going. You are a noobie, which means you are in the sweet zone, able to gain muscle and lose weight...that doesn't happen for long, so use it or lose it.

Good Luck,
TC

[chmbs1]

Wear a hat really low so you can't make eye contact with anyone. Wear headphones and crank it to just under where your ears are going to bleed. Take a preworkout with some serious focus ingredients like 1,3 dimethylamylamine and acetyl-L-Carnitine. Have a great workout. I've been doing this for about a year now and it works wonders.

[elietto92]

Sorry for the late reply guys just came back from a fishing trip.

A lot of people are insecure at some point in their lives. One thing that might help is find a fitness plan and follow it as close as you can. Just focus on yourself and the hell with everyone else.

I use to be nervous in the gym as well but now I find myself working out a hell of a lot harder then most of the others. You got this bro


When it comes to your last set have you tried to drop the weight? Drop it 5-10 pounds and you'll be able to knock it. I drop weight all the time so I can keep working out after I burnt out

I never really pay attention to anyone really. I do my own thing all the time and ignore all those buffed steroid freaks. Like I said before Im a naturally open guy wh is loud at parties, but its just fitness. Its that feeling people are looking at you and laughing.

Is that helpful with dropping weights? Does it ruin your daily routine? Ill try it and see how I go.

[elietto92]

In the time I've spent training which is quite a few different gyms I've never seen anyone openly laughing at anyone. This encompasses a lot of different people....those that are new, very out of shape, etc. I would focus on what you need to do and go with it.

Your last rep should be a struggle, you're doing it right!

Keep training hard man.

Awesome! I thought struggling was me doing something wrong!

[elietto92]

-put headphones on
-ignore and don't look or talk to anyone
-focus on your workout
-push yourself and work hard while drinking lots of water
-shower
-go home

Has been working for me for years.

I always do that. It does help kind of a lot.

[elietto92]

Fuk everyone else. You'll never see them out side of the gym anyway. Do not let someone else ruin your potential gains bro. Work hard don't bother anyone else you'll be fine. In my experience no one else really cares what you're doing

Thanks man. Thats so true. Its because I'm so used to it in school where after gym people would like remind of the fails I did in gym classes lol. Im not like that anymore anyways. My fitness skills have definitely improved since high school.

[elietto92]

welcome elietto92

Gym shyness is a big problem to why I don't join a gym despite my appearance (people tell me I look like I belong in a gym)
I think if you feel that if you feel motivated in the gym environment by all means try to make attempts to adapt
I agree it's because of social pressures on what guys are expected to do rather than what they can do.

I'd say if you like mantras get yourself a mantra to do when you feel like you're caving in (I become my own bootcamp yelling at myself.). Because I don't have a lot of extra energy to spare I usually don't max out unless I have NOTHING to do the next day. I find that when I do max out I become laggy and forgetful and it's not good since I have limited resources and time to begin with.

Think sensibly and think of your pros and cons. It's great that with your history you decide you want to get fit and become the better you, fighting off disease and living a more healthy life. And if you have a goal by a certain time but don't reach it, as long as you get there eventually. I promise that you'll face disappointments but it's about working towards your goals and not feeling the bitter rebound of the set back.

If you're struggling lol give yourself a minute sounds like you're under a bit of anxiety? if that's right find something that works for you; I sometimes stretch in between reps and I stretch before and after to really get that grounded feeling (but then again I work out in the comfort of my cave).

find what works for you, build on it, it doesn't happen overnight (patience is a b*****) and give yourself the mental space.

I agree with you man. If I had a million dollars, I would buy my own gym set and do it at home and take my sweet as time, but sadly Im not rich lol, so until then it is going to be me always at the gym.

[elietto92]

Usually the only people that look at other people all the time are those skinny idiots that don't even lift. The big guys are usually focused on their own workout and they can even help you out sometimes while your benching etc.

Haha so true! Or the ones who use their phones or on ******** and just sit their laughing at others. Just way too funny lol Thank goodness Im not skinny, but not fat, just thick bodied.

[elietto92]

figure out what you want to do before you go- write it down.

make sure you have enough stuff you can rotate around an exercise if the curl-bro's are holding up one piece of equipment.

put head phones in... .go in and do the work out.

easy peasy lemon squuezy

I know what I am doing, its just that I am at a new gym and their fitness equipment is completely different to the one I went to. I mean like setting up and changing weights is more complicated. The trainers demonstrated how to do this, but its so awkward changing them, I always resort to using the last users weights which results to me unable to finish my reps and sets incase something happens like if the machine stuffs up because I didn't put the pin all the way.

[Ago]

Haha so true! Or the ones who use their phones or on ******** and just sit their laughing at others. Just way too funny lol Thank goodness Im not skinny, but not fat, just thick bodied.

Son..... you have lots to learn




I have a phone out tho,cause i like to time my rest pauses :/. But all in all, even some big guys are shy & once you get to a stage where you look like you lift - you gonna get noticed & for some it may be uncomfortable the same way as your current situation is. They solve it with wearing hoodies etc. in gym.
If you still find it difficult to get over your fear of others looking/laughing at you, speak to your local gym trainer. You dont have to buy a program or anything, just ask to spot you or discuss about training in general. That should give you confidence about others not really caring what you are doing.

[elietto92]

It all comes down to confidence in the end of the day.

The way I look at it, if you are committed & following a solid workout program, then you have no reason not to be. Why? You might not be lifting as much as some other gym goers but you'll know that unlike 90% of people in your gym (unless you frequent a pro gym), you will be training smart & over time will make more progress than they ever will. With this knowledge you should then make sure not to let your ego get in the way - the gym isn't a competition, you should lift weights that are suited to your level of ability.

It's a state of mind. If you are fully committed & truly believe that you can reach your fitness goals, then you will find yourself worrying less about what others think.

Also, try keeping a workout log. That will give you a boost being able to track your progress helping with your confidence more.



Some people do train to failure but personally I always train such that I am around 2 reps short of failure on my last rep. If you want to train until failure, then don't be scared of not completing your last rep...otherwise it wouldn't be to failure! Just make sure you have a spotter if needed.

I agree I will take that info in. I generally have a set day for each body part. I know I should do legs on monday, but what do majority of people do for other body parts. Chest on Tuesdays? I don't know. What are people life experiences with what body parts to do first and last? My trainer says do legs first because it gives you more energy for your other body parts throughout the week (well not exactly like that) but you know.

[elietto92]

It all comes down to confidence in the end of the day.

The way I look at it, if you are committed & following a solid workout program, then you have no reason not to be. Why? You might not be lifting as much as some other gym goers but you'll know that unlike 90% of people in your gym (unless you frequent a pro gym), you will be training smart & over time will make more progress than they ever will. With this knowledge you should then make sure not to let your ego get in the way - the gym isn't a competition, you should lift weights that are suited to your level of ability.

It's a state of mind. If you are fully committed & truly believe that you can reach your fitness goals, then you will find yourself worrying less about what others think.

Also, try keeping a workout log. That will give you a boost being able to track your progress helping with your confidence more.



Some people do train to failure but personally I always train such that I am around 2 reps short of failure on my last rep. If you want to train until failure, then don't be scared of not completing your last rep...otherwise it wouldn't be to failure! Just make sure you have a spotter if needed.

Oh and this doesn't have spotters, just a guy who sits at the reception desk managing paperwork. Oh and get this right...the showers don't have locks

[elietto92]

Just completely concentrate on yourself from the moment you enter the gym. Go through your routine, do whatever it takes to get focused. Listen to some music that absorbs you and remember, everyone else is there and doing it for themselves - there's no reason whatsoever why you should deny yourself the same. You deserve it.

I generally don't care about anyone at the gym. I do my own thing and leave. But there are some messed up people who will always try and belittle someone or just love to laugh. Ive gone through 2 sessions and no one thank goodness has laughed yet and hope it stays that way.

[elietto92]

You know those big guys that you think are judging you? Try something...go over to one of them and ask them for a few pointers. 9 times out of 10, they will be glad to provide some insights. And after talking to them a bit, you will see that they are "normal" and from that point on, they will no longer be strangers.

Unless someone is HUGE and/or putting up incredible weights, for the most part, people are in their own zone and don't really care what other people are doing. Well, except if a cute girl walks by. LOL

Regarding the last rep, yes, you need to go for it, as that is a major part of reaching full muscle failure, which tears the muscles and makes it grow. Now saying that, it should be in good form and make sure you're safe doing it. For example, on dumbell curls, you can use your other hand to help bring the weight up. But for bench, you'd want to have a spotter there for that last rep or two.

Main thing is...keep going. You are a noobie, which means you are in the sweet zone, able to gain muscle and lose weight...that doesn't happen for long, so use it or lose it.

Good Luck,
TC

Yeah. My last rep I always push through. It frustrates me as I look extremely stupid when I start shaking trying to push. Thats the only thing I hate, otherwise I love it. I hope it goes down the more I train

[elietto92]

Wear a hat really low so you can't make eye contact with anyone. Wear headphones and crank it to just under where your ears are going to bleed. Take a preworkout with some serious focus ingredients like 1,3 dimethylamylamine and acetyl-L-Carnitine. Have a great workout. I've been doing this for about a year now and it works wonders.

Haha sounds good but Ill look awkward doing that. People will think something suss with my hat down low.

[Tuksonrider]

Self-conscious is just that. You are bringing in your own insecurities in the gym. I can guarantee, no one else in the gym cares except you. No one is looking, no one is judging, and honestly, no one cares. And if someone does judge, who cares? What is the value of their opinion? ZERO. Less than zero.

I'm 41, and I have high schoolers out lifting me right next to me. You know what? I don't care. I'm in the gym doing it. Not for them, not for anyone but myself.

Before, during and after, just psych yourself up. Tell yourself you are there because you want to improve you. Simple as that. The rest of the world can fuk themselves because their opinion means squat.

BTW, if you ain't struggling, then you ain't lifting heavy ass weights.

[OxbowSky]

I deal with the same issue. Especially because a lot of guys my age in college workout at my gym and they're usually in groups being very loud and I'm by myself. Most of them are the kind of guys that when I'm doing my workout ill look you and see them watching. I'm not sure if its a confidence builder to know they are stronger then me or what. But to answer your question I've found that if you toggle into your adrenaline and just go all out you'll stop thinking about If people are watching you because you'll be so focused on yourself and it will boost your confidence. As a fairly skinny guy Id say some of the heavy lifters at the gym respect me because they see me as a thin guy going balls to the wall not caring what others think. But yeah the thought of a group of people watching me laughing does cross my mind also. Just let it fuel your adrenaline.

[riffdex]

I used to suffer from gym shyness. It really sucks when you start weightlifting and you don't feel very competent yet, and you see all these huge, accomplished weightlifters everywhere. Just remember that 90% of those guys were once in your same position before and they probably won't judge you. Even if they do, who cares? Are you doing this for them or you? You do not need their approval, just keep working hard because believe me it will pay off. I think if you ignore the other gymgoers and just try to focus on music while lifting, you'll be a lot better off. Honestly, I can tell when someone is working out alone and they are uncomfortable. They keep looking around - to see if ppl are looking at them! Only other time I notice someone is if they are performing an exercise with poor form (usually the result of trying to lift clearly too much weight). If you feel you are doing an exercise without peak form, I would highly suggest that you ask one of the pros to help you out on your form, so you can get it down. This has nothing to do with avoiding criticism, exercising with poor form can cause devastating injuries. Usually the pros are happy to share their knowledge. Im sure when you are in their shoes, you would happily take some time to coach a novice.