GF of 3 years and I on the verge breaking up. Psychology Brahs GTFIH, need advice.

[alexsmhs]

It's over dude, i experienced the same thing.. The most obvious is the decline in sex, meaning she is no longer attracted to you. You're always there for her, you repositioned yourself to be her "best friend" rather than her lover by getting too comfortable and spending way too much time together, she now basically loves you as a best friend and not something she wants to fuk.. You're the guy she can talk about anything with, share her dreams...etc just like a gay friend but she feels obligated to fuk you every now and then to keep you content. Let me guess, you probably dropped all your friends and started hanging out with her all day, every day 24/7. People get sick of each other, that spark that was once there is gone; she has you figured out and you're predictable. When she sees guys around she probably starts feeling like a little lustful sloot and they probably eye fuk her and it starts stirring up these lost feelings she hasn't felt in years because she has been with you. She feels attraction, desire, something new and exciting, a different cawk to slurp on.. Honestly if she hasn't already cheated, she's been texting/getting hot and wet for another guy and she probably feels trapped and does love/care about you as a FRIEND and doesn't know how to let you down gently. You guys are dependent on each other, you should never make her a priority in your life.. She's an accessory to fuk and kick it with every now and then but you can't let a relationship control your life and let your lives revolve around eachother, it's time to change things up.

The damage is already done but the best move you can do about this situation is to simply drop off the face of the earth and do not initiate any contact with her, none at all. If she calls you every day you do not answer that phone.. I'm absolutely positive it will tear her apart but who cares you need to move on, and no contact is the only thing that can benefit you at this point

[bvannn59]

It's because she's tasted someone elses cawk or is strongly thinking about it / is in love with someone else

She's in strong denial anyway brah and there's a lot she's not telling you. There's a little sloot hidden in every girl and they will unleash their inner sloot either before dating you, while being with you or after you and this is a fact brothers.

So much this

[rugbie]

Cutting contact and "seeing what happens" is pretty much a break you fuking tard

But you don't call it a break, breaks are for *******s.
After breaking up, I would never go back to her, and after her realizing that I would love to see what her reaction towards it would be.
I would have A LOT of fun if she came crawling back, but if she didn't then I'd be sweet with that too. Move on, slay more bishes.
A break gives her the mind set that no matter what she does, there will be a stage where you come back and discuss the month apart, she would know she would be able to have a month of "get out of jail free card".
Straight up breaking up doesn't give that.

[rugbie]

It's over dude, i experienced the same thing.. The most obvious is the decline in sex, meaning she is no longer attracted to you. You're always there for her, you repositioned yourself to be her "best friend" rather than her lover by getting too comfortable and spending way too much time together, she now basically loves you as a best friend and not something she wants to fuk.. You're the guy she can talk about anything with, share her dreams...etc just like a gay friend but she feels obligated to fuk you every now and then to keep you content. Let me guess, you probably dropped all your friends and started hanging out with her all day, every day 24/7. People get sick of each other, that spark that was once there is gone; she has you figured out and you're predictable. When she sees guys around she probably starts feeling like a little lustful sloot and they probably eye fuk her and it starts stirring up these lost feelings she hasn't felt in years because she has been with you. She feels attraction, desire, something new and exciting, a different cawk to slurp on.. Honestly if she hasn't already cheated, she's been texting/getting hot and wet for another guy and she probably feels trapped and does love/care about you as a FRIEND and doesn't know how to let you down gently.

The damage is already done but the best move you can do about this situation is to simply drop off the face of the earth and do not initiate any contact with her, none at all. If she calls you every day you do not answer that phone.. I'm absolutely positive it will tear her apart but who cares you need to move on, and no contact is the only thing that can benefit you at this point

Will rep on recharge.

[rugbie]

Have a break OP. Sounds like you are both getting bored with each other. Have fun, travel, ect ect. If it was meant to be it will spark up again.

Best of luck bro. My buddy was in this exact situation and I know he was hurting. Have the strength to walk away and dont hate her (unless she cheated...kill her if thats the case). Dont take it as you wasted 3 years, you were happy, you had fun, thanks for the memories, best of luck ect ect. Some things just aren't meant to be. Who knows bro, it may not be but you need to now move on and live life....you're young bro.

Yeah this is exactly how we're treating it. Walk away with great memories, great times shared and we've both learnt a phuckload from our time together. Not to mention how much I've learnt about womenz and how to handle relationships. It has never been a waste of time.
I like how you put it, seems like I can relate a lot to this.

Will rep on recharge

[qurs]

I've known her for 3 years and I know her very well.
Her body language is a dead give away when she's trying to hide something. I always see right through it. She's a terrible liar and can't lie and look me in the eye. She can't even keep secrets from me lol.
I think it would be destroying her from the inside if she did, and it would come out sooner or later. She's not as sneaky and immoral as some other sloots.
But then there is that bullchit that i've heard being talked about called "emotional cheating" or whatever the phuck that is. That's something that I can see happening.

That's legit. But keep in mind we can never truly know someone else. We will only ever think our own thoughts. And sometimes we keep ourselves from seeing what's right in front us. Don't let my negative persepective poison your mind either though.

[Codo]

She says she gets easily frustrated and annoyed with tiny little things I do, just me being me. She doesn't know why.

She is slowly building up resentment that will snowball and be even worse down the road OP. It happens to people our age all the time, mine happened to a 5 year relationship when i was 22. People actually grow up during 20-25 and change without actually knowing it. She has/is obviously doing this and it will never go back to how it was. Would say sorry brah but you are young and said you grew a lot from it, doesn't really sound like it's something to be sorry about.

this guy right here.

happened to me after a 4 year when i was 22 as well.

best thing that can happen to a man, totally serious.

[Reynosskuz]

If she's cheating or not it doesn't matter at the moment brah because to be honest, it's over.
Sucks to break it to you brah but you need to mentally game yourself to prepare for the next rocky few days/weeks you gon' have.
As the above brah said the relationship has ran it's course by the sounds of it, shes slowly distancing herself from you until a point where a break can be made to travel etc.... That goes downhill more brother. That's where the bad chit happens.

Have a talk with her and be straight up, say you know what's going on with her distancing herself and it was a good run but no point wasting time.
Lifes too short brah you can be happier alone tbh, the stress aint worth chit!

[Q-Tip-81]

But you don't call it a break, breaks are for *******s.
After breaking up, I would never go back to her, and after her realizing that I would love to see what her reaction towards it would be.
I would have A LOT of fun if she came crawling back, but if she didn't then I'd be sweet with that too. Move on, slay more bishes.
A break gives her the mind set that no matter what she does, there will be a stage where you come back and discuss the month apart, she would know she would be able to have a month of "get out of jail free card".
Straight up breaking up doesn't give that.

Agreed. There is no going back once it's done. Make sure she knows that when you break up and NC.

[Reynosskuz]

this guy right here.

happened to me after a 4 year when i was 22 as well.

best thing that can happen to a man, totally serious.

Yep, happened to me too, except the fact that I was on the other side of the spectrum. Slowly distancing myself cos chit got dry. never knew why I just lost motivation and feelings towards her.

I'm sure brahs can relate to me here when you hear your phone ring and it's the gf and you put it in silent because it really is an effort just talking to the bish lmao like fuk- she calling again?

[DirtNastyBaby]

She will leave you, **** another guy, realize she gave up three years of her life for a night out. Cry, beg you take her back, and you will post a thread on the misc asking what do. Misc will say sloots gon sloot, OP don't take her back.

[duMonde]

You sound gay. Drink a protein shake!

strong 1rd post

[esmile]

You actually sound like you know what you're doing. Disregard the advice you will find here. If I was in your situation again I would just instantly go no contact. It'll save you a lot of heartbreak and worrying finding out the stuff she's doing and ****. Goodluck.

[rugbie]

You actually sound like you know what you're doing. Disregard the advice you will find here. If I was in your situation again I would just instantly go no contact. It'll save you a lot of heartbreak and worrying finding out the stuff she's doing and ****. Goodluck.

Thanks brah, yeah I haven't really felt out of control of the situation at all, which has been quite reassuring to me.
I'm not going to disregard the advice on here though, that is why I asked for advice in the first place. Just like in the gym, certain things work for certain people in relationships and in life.
There is no one and only end all solution because everyone is different.
I read all the advice that has been posted here and consider different sides, different opinions and relate it to what I see is happening.
Its like an unbiased breath of fresh air, and that is why I love the misc.

[TheCaptainA]

OP please for the love of God, listen to the Misc.

She MAY NOT be ****ing someone. But she is cheating/interested/talking to someone else! I lived this bro not even 3 months ago. Does she have any new friends? Is she texting people and turning the phone away so you cant see it? Is it magically locked all of a sudden?

She is losing feelings because at this age, girls want to see what its like to be single. 3 yrs is a long time for a young slut. They feel caged in and they want to get out and sloot it up. It isnt so much that it is stale, it is that she just wants to sloot/see what else is out there. Period.

Dump the bitch and start the moving on process now. Her heart is not in it anymore. The bitch quit on you. Just stop talking to her now. May even awaken feelings in her by being alpha. But go NC. NOW. And cut the bitch.

[quickups]

thanks brah, yeah i haven't really felt out of control of the situation at all, which has been quite reassuring to me.
I'm not going to disregard the advice on here though, that is why i asked for advice in the first place. Just like in the gym, certain things work for certain people in relationships and in life.
There is no one and only end all solution because everyone is different.
I read all the advice that has been posted here and consider different sides, different opinions and relate it to what i see is happening.
Its like an unbiased breath of fresh air, and that is why i love the misc.

update???

[sallgoodbaby]

in 4 later

[rugbie]

update???

None yet, she'l come talk to me when she is ready. Maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow.

[Namedoesntfi]

Start cheating on her. I'm serious.

Learn to fuk also. Give her some sexual variety you lazy ass *******.

[eat-sleep-lift]

I don't believe in breaks. I know I will go out and phuck other chicks if I have a break. Breaks are a waste of time.
I would rather break up, cut contact and see what happens.

na bro honestly an exclusive break is a better option. If you guys start dating other people then the game is up. Youll always be bitter towards each other if you get back together. Youll resent each other for sharing yourselves with other people

[rugbie]

Start cheating on her. I'm serious.

Learn to fuk also. Give her some sexual variety you lazy ass *******.

Get a real bike *******.

[jamespoe1]

see if you can live without her.


srs go a few months and be away from each other

if you dont go back at it like wild animals. its done and dead kill it now if you want to maybe see this chick in your future. if not... let whats gonna happen happen. the it getting worse will happen.

[Mjuicyness]

All relationships go through ruts from time to time. What leads a couple through a rut is the desire from both parties to get there. If you are the only one putting in work or wanting it to work, then it won't work.

Have a convo with her and see if she just feels stuck right now, or if she feels detached from the relationship altogether. If she just feels stuck, but loves you, then you might be able to work through it (it just takes work and dedication on both ends...). If its the latter, then treat the relationship as a golden learning opportunity that will prepare you for a long-lasting one down the road.

[Tweedurr]

Been here before. Here is your answer:

She loves you and vice versa, but if she can't get over the little things then she isn't IN love with you anymore. Best of luck OP.

[Namedoesntfi]

Get a real bike *******.

Charming.

[AJ7123]

I don't know if you want to hear from a girl, but I had the same feelings with my ex.

We dated for 3 yrs, and eventually it got to the point where he was just constantly getting on my nerves. When he would touch me he would make my skin crawl. And like most guys here he was convinced I was cheating. I was not. Tried his best to catch me cheating, but since I wasn't no luck.

The issue for me was he just got too comfortable. He stopped trying. I felt like we were married for years. I was too young and the relationship too new for me to be feeling like that.

Like a lot of guys have said on here, I think a contributing factor was we were spending way too much time together. I resented the fact that I always had to factor him into my decisions and plans, I felt suffocated and held back. Which eventually led to resentment on my part. And so once I resented him, it didn't take much on his part to piss me off.

I think when you're young, you're selfish. It's hard to think in terms of 'we' when you're at a point in life when you just want to worry about yourself. Unfortunately I waited until I was at the point of no return to let him know how I felt, I think that if I would have said something sooner and we could have just given each other some breathing space the relationship would have continued. That was my mistake. I think it's a mistake a lot of girls make; waiting until you're about to burst to say anything cause you don't want to hurt his feelings. But maybe your girl isn't at that point yet. My advice would be to give her space, allow her room to breath and be able to find herself. I'm sure at this point you two are so intertwined she doesn't know where she ends and you start.

Anyway just my 2cents. Good luck.

[Quibble]

I don't know if you want to hear from a girl, but I had the same feelings with my ex.

We dated for 3 yrs, and eventually it got to the point where he was just constantly getting on my nerves. When he would touch me he would make my skin crawl. And like most guys here he was convinced I was cheating. I was not. Tried his best to catch me cheating, but since I wasn't no luck.

The issue for me was he just got too comfortable. He stopped trying. I felt like we were married for years. I was too young and the relationship too new for me to be feeling like that.

Like a lot of guys have said on here, I think a contributing factor was we were spending way too much time together. I resented the fact that I always had to factor him into my decisions and plans, I felt suffocated and held back. Which eventually led to resentment on my part. And so once I resented him, it didn't take much on his part to piss me off.

I think when you're young, you're selfish. It's hard to think in terms of 'we' when you're at a point in life when you just want to worry about yourself. Unfortunately I waited until I was at the point of no return to let him know how I felt, I think that if I would have said something sooner and we could have just given each other some breathing space the relationship would have continued. That was my mistake. I think it's a mistake a lot of girls make; waiting until you're about to burst to say anything cause you don't want to hurt his feelings. But maybe your girl isn't at that point yet. My advice would be to give her space, allow her room to breath and be able to find herself. I'm sure at this point you two are so intertwined she doesn't know where she ends and you start.

Anyway just my 2cents. Good luck.

I see this all the time on public transit; dude is kissing/stroking/PDAing the f*ck out of his girlfriend, meanwhile she's looking uncomfortable and checking out me or tyrone.

[listenlisten]

She don't love you no more homie

[Myronniecoleman]

i understand wanting to rule cheating out but i just went through somthing really similar with my girlfriend of a year and in the end it turned out she had cheated. i hope for your sake she hasn't. we're all gonna make it.

[Myronniecoleman]

I've known her for 3 years and I know her very well.
Her body language is a dead give away when she's trying to hide something. I always see right through it. She's a terrible liar and can't lie and look me in the eye. She can't even keep secrets from me lol.
I think it would be destroying her from the inside if she did, and it would come out sooner or later. She's not as sneaky and immoral as some other sloots.
But then there is that bullchit that i've heard being talked about called "emotional cheating" or whatever the phuck that is. That's something that I can see happening.

your description of your girlfriend is exactly as i would have described mine. This is sooooo similar to what happened to me less than a month ago. Dont rule out cheating man, it sounds likely, you dont want to believe it nor do you believe she could have but in my case it turned out she did. Don't live in denial.