Sickness, Been Out of the Gym, Motivation Issues

[Tinyblu]

WARNING: I'm about to whine...

It turns out that my insistence on going to the gym last Friday despite being a little under the weather was a BIG mistake. By Sunday's urgent care visit, my "little cold" had turned into a full blown respiratory infection. I am still taking a lovely antibiotic cocktail and not back to my old self (but I am still going to TRY to get back to the gym today).

Here's my deal: I'm just... frustrated. I have a hard time with the fact that I am 16% bodyfat and at least 15% of it sits on the side of my thighs laughing at me. a 27" waist and 39" hips just WON'T do. I know all of the mantras about not being able to spot lose... blah, blah, blah, but WHY IS THAT THE CASE? How is it that you can literally carry body fat in ONE place on your body?

I've been working to lose overall bodyfat (but it's NOT overall), but I am not happy with the fact that you can count my ribs now but those hips are still there. My butt has lifted drastically thanks to all the lifting, but what gives...

So maybe I'm just cranky because I'm hungry and on a fat burner that's causing mood swings, but it make me wonder... WHAT THE HELL IS ALL THIS FOR? As I made my millionth protein shake this morning and faithfully passed on dessert at a barbecue yesterday (I even took the skin off my grilled chicken and ate salad) only to see the same hip measurement, I started to wonder... is it worth it?

I HATE cardio, yet I have been literally killing myself in the past couple of weeks in hopes of seeing a change to no avail. Should I just concede defeat and recognize that no matter how much I work I will only become a more fit pear? Should I start saving for lipo? Maybe that truly is my only alternative.

I dunno... it just doesn't make any sense to me that NOTHING is working. I don't want to lose any more upper body weight and those hips aren't moving. Maybe it's time for me to just accept that my beach days with nothing wrapped around my waist are over.

Feel free to break out your violins at any given point... yeah... I gotta stop the Yohimbine....

[thepowerwithin]

I don't think you should take yourself so seriously right now.

You've been sick, on stuff that makes you feel bad, and have been let down by unrealistic expectations.

This too shall pass .

[BEEvon]

I totally get where your coming from. I am the same. 24" waist 36" hip. * sigh*

All I can tell you is- you haven't been at it long enough. Rounds and rounds of bulking/cutting WILL eventually help:
I can actually diet down a bit more now that I have some more muscle on my upper half. I don't look so ematiated. This allows me to get more fat off the lower 1/2. My lower body has made improvements because I have more underlying muscle there now. But it will realistically take me years to get to where I'd like to be.

You've made some great improvements already and we are always our own worst critics. Stick with it! You'll get there. Doubting yourself is the worst thing you can do.

Hope you feel better soon!

[dalkristel]

Don't be hard on yourself you have a great figure - the fact that you can count your ribs makes me envious wish I could! Just keep going and once you get better, you will be feeling more positive but try not to train whilst your ill or your illness will last for longer and the cycle will keep on and on... get yourself better, get your head in gear once you are and your motivation will kick in and you will kick ass! Your looking fab so stop worrying!

[sonti]

You need some self love, you really do. You're 35 and have a 27" waist, you have a nice butt (is "no homo" what the guys say???) and you look great. You want to tweak it, that's fine, but don't go killing yourself and picturing some sort of obese girl in the mirror either.

You're 5'3 and 127. I'm 5'4.5 () and also 127. I've been quite lean before my kids so believe me when I say this, it is a CRAWL at this stage of the game. You're already a great size so to be fantastic, takes a lot of time and effort.

[Tinyblu]

Thanks everyone. I really do think I am having a Yohimbine meltdown (no more Hydroxycut Hardcore Elite)

I actually decided to (GASP) take the entire week off to re-group. That will allow me to finish my antibiotics and get back to 100%. It will also give me a chance to rest my brain a bit. I have been hitting the gym religiously for months. A little break won't hurt. Who knows? I may have over-trained some as well.

...so the rest of the week I'll keep the diet clean (well... I may indulge my pizza craving at some point), but instead of hitting the gym, I'll take my dog on long walks and take it easy.

It's my hope that coming off the fat burner will return me back to the SMALL level of sanity I think I tend to have (smile) and kill some of the perfectionism.

From the looks of this board, a week off may actually be a GOOD thing. It remains to be seen...