Okay, so I am new to the misc, but I have lurked around the forums before to know that some of you guys here can give me good advice. Sorry about my vent on my life, but I don't have anyone I can trust to say this to, so ****it, the internet it is. As the title suggests, how do I stop being such a little beta pssy around girls I like? I am 16 years old, never had a girlfriend, but I talk to girls enough to know that they see me as some "nice guy". It was not until recently that I went through some threads and saw how much of a littlebitch I was being and how "scared" I was. I am antisocial, but I can talk with people whom I partly know and can talk with people a lot when i get to know them, but the issue is breaking the ice with people whom I never even talked with before, especially girls. there have been a good number of girls that I like/ would date etc., but I am too beta to even say hi to them, even when they look at me a lot! i don't fcking know what happened to me as a kid, but I was never a social guy myself, even way back into elementary school. I can blame it on the fact that none of the male role models in my household are exactly alpha in any sense, or that I was deprived of female interaction in my life (only have a brother, all my cousins except one are guys), but that is a excuse. I was overweight until 6th - 7th grade, where I actually started to exercise and lose weight, and I gained confidence in my looks... but I am not confident in myself overall.
It was not even a week ago where I decided that I cannot live this pitiful life as a "nice guy" or as an insecure beta**** that folds up whenever I see a girl I like. I took some initiative in improving my posture and my demeanor when i approach people. I am practicing to make eye contact with everyone I see/meet, whether of not they are a guy or a girl. Also, I used to be so down on myself for not being this or not being that (eg too short, not buff enough, not good looking enough) and throwing that out the window. Fck what I am not, I fcking here and I am here to fcking stay. It is still a long process for me, but I have to gain this self confidence in myself that I am the motherfcker, whether or not others see it that way. I can't feel sorry about myself and what I am not, and focus on the things important in life, but of course, it's easier to say this than to do it.
essentially, I want to know what you guys did to become the kind of person you are? Some of you alphas out there getting pssy every other hour, how do you guys build, if not, acquire this sense of power and confidence? to be honest, I am lost with my life, and really no sense of purpose in it. my grades in high school sucks and the only thing I can focus on is girls, but I am not having much luck in that department. I want to be able to talk to girls decently enough so that it does not hinder my growth in the future.
Looking at my life in perspective, I admit that what I fear most is rejection, and I know that personally. There have been two girls so far in my life that have in a way rejected me and saw me only as a "friend". The first girl I admitted to her that I have liked her for 3 years, but she only wanted to be my friend. In reponse to her, I just said fckthat and stopped being her friend. the second girl was similar to the first, but I guess I responded like a beta by just not talking to her for like almost 1 year now. I stopped talking to these girls and I refused to be a friend to girls that i wanted to date. Is this the right course of action? one of the girls called me insecure and a jerk for only wanted to date them and not being a friend to them? I mean, wtf, I don't want to just be a friend to girls. Girls I talk to now are the ones I wanna date, but I have troubles talking to them a lot. I lose my mind and start ****tingbricks whenever I talk to them, yet I noticed that there are guys around them that could talk to them just like that. Easy. I believe i keep a good distance of girls I wanna date and those I don't ever want to be in the same bed with. With girls I never want to bed, I can be whatever to them and not care what I say. girls I want to date are ones where I am the most careful... I just don't want to be rejected like before. However, I know you guys out there cannot find it in your mind to give a single, don't mention one half, of a **** about rejection. How do you guys deal with rejection?? whenever I get rejected, I just stop talking to them, but other people seem to be completely unphased by it..
and one last thing. So there is this girl in my class that i like a lot, but I am obviously too pssy to really be that assertive guy. I sit next to her, and I have talked to her a lot and made her laugh and flirt (kinda) wwith her, but I don't want to end up as a good "friend" like before. the guy that sits behind her can talk to her so easily and could even talk to the girl behind me as well (which is hot as fck). I am just there fishing for things to say... the best is when we have to work together on an assignment where I can talk more easily, but straight up I fck up. So if you stayed this long to read, sorry for taking up your time, but give this beta ******* some advice/criticism/life lessons that I can go by.
Cliffs: Living as a beta ******* whenever with girls I like
Tired of being "nice guy" or friend"
fears rejection: 2 girls rejected me before, so ended up not being their friend, cause fckthat
how do you deal with rejection?
talking to the girl I like, but too much of betabitch to make a strong move at her, decent relationship
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04-02-2013, 05:58 PM #1
How to stop being such a beta *******?
Last edited by SomeGuyHear; 04-02-2013 at 06:15 PM.
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04-02-2013, 06:07 PM #2
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04-02-2013, 06:09 PM #3
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04-02-2013, 06:13 PM #4
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04-02-2013, 06:17 PM #5
I'm with you on the whole asocial, don't want to be friends with girls I don't plan to date. Damn. There's this girl that's obviously been eyeing me and trying to get my attention since October 2012 and I have not said a word to her yet. It still seems that she sees something in me even though I have been ignoring her cues for months now. I've always thought that if a girl is attracted to you, they will have tunnel vision; meaning you could falter on first impressions, but they will still be able to see through it and still be attracted to you. I don't know how true this is. It feels so wrong giving advice to you because I'm in the same boat as you haha. Regardless, don't see that other guy as competition. Keep doing what you're doing, always do things with a mission. I've found that people in general stand out when they set goals for themselves. Don't neglect the small goals you can do everyday. It seems silly, but you will look more confident and hopefully you will actually be more confident by doing this. If you falter, just keep going. Who cares if you stuttered? There's always bigger issues in the world and just because you stumbled doesn't mean you're going to be headline news by the end of the evening. If you're getting a textbook on the other side of the room, go get it like it's your mission. Be swift, walk strong, work hard.
Just my 2 cents. Spend it however you like.
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04-02-2013, 06:17 PM #6
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04-02-2013, 06:19 PM #7
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04-02-2013, 06:21 PM #8
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04-02-2013, 06:22 PM #9
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04-02-2013, 06:24 PM #10
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04-02-2013, 06:26 PM #11
Who cares if you are the first one up to get a textbook? Everyone's looking at you, maybe some people label you as a nerd. They are silly, they only see the superficial things. People really do notice when you work hard and it's a great feeling to realize this. All the small steps that make a difference.
I feel like I'm writing in my journal lol
The biggest thing that set me free is the mindset that you're always after a greater mission and the mountains you face really aren't as big as you make them out to be.
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04-02-2013, 06:27 PM #12
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04-02-2013, 06:27 PM #13
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04-02-2013, 06:29 PM #14
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04-02-2013, 06:30 PM #15
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04-02-2013, 08:27 PM #16
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04-02-2013, 09:26 PM #17
I was the biggest beta ******* too
I was the biggest beta too,I had a gf for 17months before we had a thing for a year and you know what? She left me for some ripped skinny dude our age back when I was 15. After that I got sick of the friendzoning and lifted and ate loads for a good 4 years.It's the best feeling in the world when the people that friendzoned you look at you now and want you back. I handled rejection by not caring what people think about me and kept doing my thing. More importantly matters is what you think of yourself, always aim to be a better version of yourself everyday op and you'll acquire confidence and lack insecurity.
√5'10" Optimal Race Crew
√ I rep back
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04-02-2013, 10:27 PM #18
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04-02-2013, 11:09 PM #19
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04-03-2013, 07:20 PM #20
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04-03-2013, 07:29 PM #21
- Join Date: Nov 2009
- Location: Ohio, United States
- Age: 30
- Posts: 9,814
- Rep Power: 12795
Go here OP. Srs. I posted this fkking thread for a reason. For people like YOU OP. Read #2
Everyone else can benefit too. If you are scrolling on by on this 'How to stop being such a beta *******?' thread and you are READING MY REPLY RIGHT NOW, CLICK THIS FOLLOWING THREAD and read it:
Actually, you know what? BEFORE YOU EVEN READ IT: Scroll down and look at the replies of other people that have read it. Then, only then, make your decision if you want to read it.
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=152939031Last edited by Niko49ers; 04-04-2013 at 07:38 AM.
..:: Sports Teams ::..
-49ers
-Buckeyes
..:: Gaming Names ::..
-Runescape: Alex_Osu (banned, RIP) New RS Name: Molinus
-Xbox Live: Rejecting_You
*KD Crew*
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04-03-2013, 07:32 PM #22
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04-03-2013, 09:00 PM #23
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04-03-2013, 09:02 PM #24
- Join Date: Nov 2009
- Location: Ohio, United States
- Age: 30
- Posts: 9,814
- Rep Power: 12795
Will do brah. Thanks for the suggestion. I let that thread die down, but I'll go find it again.
Link to the NUTS thread that can help you TMISCers out as well. That is, only if you apply it to your life: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=152930971..:: Sports Teams ::..
-49ers
-Buckeyes
..:: Gaming Names ::..
-Runescape: Alex_Osu (banned, RIP) New RS Name: Molinus
-Xbox Live: Rejecting_You
*KD Crew*
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04-03-2013, 09:11 PM #25
Tell the bish:
"What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ****ing dead, kiddo."
Guaranteed smash. Everyone will think your alpha as fuark.
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04-03-2013, 10:10 PM #26
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05-13-2013, 10:24 PM #27
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03-18-2014, 11:22 PM #28
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03-19-2014, 05:23 AM #29
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03-19-2014, 06:16 AM #30
- Join Date: Jul 2013
- Location: Mexico, Mexico, Mexico
- Age: 25
- Posts: 112
- Rep Power: 171
I was like this a year ago. I started just saying hi to people i didnt know on the street it helps because they dont know you and if they dont start a conversation and stuff you get to deal a little bit with the feeling of rejection. Once you talk to girls comfortably is the bestfeeling ever. You need to be confident 100 on yourself and then everything will just flow
You're stupid until it's proved otherwise...
Stats :
Weight : 175 lbs
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