husband is driving me nuts

[Tress123]

i lost 63 lbs and now really getting into fitness and health. im considering even becoming a fitness instructor. but my husband is just gaining more and more weight never wants to work out and wont even act like he is interested in what i have to say about it. i drive. him crazy and if i become a fitness instructor going to even get more into it. i feel like our lives are heading diff directions but i dont want to stop being this way and just be avg weight because he doesnt like it. has anyone seen this happen or have the same problem. honestly ive just gotten less attracted to him because he eats so much and what not.

[MrBungle11]

Is there any way you can encourage him to participate in things without it coming across as "you need to do this to lose weight"? He could be the type of guy where the more you push the more stubborn he becomes (I'm similar). Who cooks? Can you change any meals you cook to healthy meals so you are indirectly helping him? He could just be jealous of your drive & attitude and wishes he had it too so being all snarky about it

ps congrats on the 63!

[aintevenmad]

You do the grocery shopping, you do the cooking. If he continues to buy/eat crap then that's his issue. He'll eventually get jealous enough to change.

[tetraktys13]

^^lol'd at sig
---
You know your going to cheat on him, if you haven't already, with some better looking/in shape guy so why delay the inevitable?

Since he isn't giving you what you want, get it from somewhere else or stop complaining like a whiny little bitch.

[DocHol1day]

such a tough situation to be in. i've been in it before, but with other things like life goals instead of fitness. my situation didnt work out, but it was just a relationship not a marriage. he probably feels threatened and like you may be wanting to upgrade or something. men dont like to talk about stuff like that, but i know women do stuff like what youre describing when their man gets in good shape because my ex wife did that to me many years ago. anyway good luck

[Tress123]

thanks you guys.. and no i wont cheat on him because i would never do that.. if anything leave but i would hate to do that

[PersonalHelicon]

Sounds like you want to bounce because you're not a fatty anymore and d00dz finally are giving you looks.

Unconditional love/monogamy, not even once.

Hope Tubs copped a prenup.

[HayZues Christi]

lol @ every fatty who loses a few pounds thinking they should be trainers.

[Tress123]

first off i never said i wanted to bounce.. if i did i wouldnt have asked for advice i love my hubby and wish he would realize how much better and energetic he would.feel. second of all i use to be in great shape but gained weight with four pregnancys and then lost it all again.. ive already been helping people with weightloss and enjoy it throughly.. Its a passion of mine so yes i would love to make a career out of it! unlike people who have just been in shape the whole time i have been their and understand where they are coming from

[PersonalHelicon]

honestly ive just gotten less attracted to him because he eats so much and what not.

Read: Sloot code for I am doing better all of the sudden and thus my life deserves to be instantly better in all regards. (Read: D)

Tell him, "Honestly Pops, I've squirted out 4 babies for you but that is just going to mean a bigger child support check (Read: Not just bigger Vag) if you don't start working up a sweat outside of shoving Lays in your mouth".

Or; be a ****ing human being and be patient with him, using the gentle nagging only a true wimmenz could provide, rather than the degrading absolutism of sloot logic.

Give him ~1 year to realize he must do it for his own health and not because you're just ego tripping and see if he comes around, if he does then it is true love!!!

If he doesn't, divorce + self-righteousness = Profit???

[AusPower]

first off i never said i wanted to bounce.. if i did i wouldnt have asked for advice i love my hubby and wish he would realize how much better and energetic he would.feel. second of all i use to be in great shape but gained weight with four pregnancys and then lost it all again.. ive already been helping people with weightloss and enjoy it throughly.. Its a passion of mine so yes i would love to make a career out of it! unlike people who have just been in shape the whole time i have been their and understand where they are coming from

Good luck with the career change, keep in mind though you will be dealing with people with your husband's attitude a lot though. Speaking from experience a lot of the people who get a personal trainer do not want to be there but are there because they either feel guilty or because someone else told them they need to, most aren't willing or ready to put in the hard work to change their lifestyle and to be quite honest it can start to drag you down because they are so negative. I only train friends or friends of friends now that are clearly committed as I couldn't handle dealing with those people anymore and keep my cool.

As for your husband. He either wants to change or he doesn't. If he doesn't the relationship is headed towards it's end point because you can't make him change, he has to want to and if you try he will just resent you and you will resent him.

[MrRIP]

first off i never said i wanted to bounce.. if i did i wouldnt have asked for advice i love my hubby and wish he would realize how much better and energetic he would.feel. second of all i use to be in great shape but gained weight with four pregnancys and then lost it all again.. ive already been helping people with weightloss and enjoy it throughly.. Its a passion of mine so yes i would love to make a career out of it! unlike people who have just been in shape the whole time i have been their and understand where they are coming from

How do you bring up the conversations?
Are you nagging?
Are you asking him to join you?
Blackmailing him into working out?

[Montre]

OP wants to upgrade. Ain't nobody got time for slobs

[Wakiza33]

Just sent this thread to your husband.

Bill is going to be upset.






Verrry upset.

[SirTerrythe3rd]

Just sent this thread to your husband.

Bill is going to be upset.






Verrry upset.

the internets is a turrible place.

[tbonez3858]

Just sent this thread to your husband.

Bill is going to be upset.






Verrry upset.

LOL...I hope this is true.

[laffytaffy]

Just sent this thread to your husband.

[redliner9]

Sounds like you want to bounce because you're not a fatty anymore and d00dz finally are giving you looks.

Unconditional love/monogamy, not even once.

Hope Tubs copped a prenup.

X2

Its funny how these overweight women lose a little weight and start thinkning they are gods gift to man.

Then they start nagging on everyone around them to lose weight, especially their SO, etc.

Reminds me of someone who "found god" and wants to convert everyone they come into contact with.

[Tiffany Wantsmore]

If this thread was made by a guy whose gf was fat, the responses would be entirely different and you all know it.

[saetarubia]

How long have you been married OP?

[mujie]

If this thread was made by a guy whose gf was fat, the responses would be entirely different and you all know it.

And your point is?

This all stands to reason.Men are visually stimulated by the opposite sex.Looks=Everything.Women are more holistic when it comes to attraction of the opposite sex.The majority of women place very little value Ina mans physical appearance.Thats why most men can't understand when they see hot chicks with average looking guys.Men also have a lot more to offer as a partner apart from good looks

Edit:I'm not making excuses for the fat slob husband

[mydawgs]

If this thread was made by a guy whose gf was fat, the responses would be entirely different and you all know it.

Yup you are right, so my advice will be the same to OP. It is his job to keep you sexually interested as it is yours to keep his sexual attention. He needs to man up and get sexy and healthy....it is what he signed up for when you all said I DO.

[devin45k]

That's how I was with my ex. I got big into lifting and bodybuilding (she encouraged it at first), she kept partying and getting bigger (doesnt bother me that she gained weight, cuz she was already bigger). It was frustrating to see the lack of attention or respect I would get after a while about working out.

[Boffothe]

Congrats on losing weight, but like everyone has said, fat chicks who lose a few lbs always think they're fitness experts and lecture everyone around them. Just leave him already, you're going to eventually. You've worked hard and earned a few new dicks I suppose

[BIGrob84]

What the fuk ever happened to marriage being for better or for worse? Homeboy isn't cheating on you or beating the fuk out of you is he? Just love him and be positive. He needs to want to change. Just because you ALL OF SUDDEN change doesn't mean he has to. Talk to him, share your concerns, and work through them.

I would give this same advice to a married man who's wife is getting fat. You need to EXHAUST all efforts before you go and throw in the towel.

[Fit1NYC]

Stop having sex with him and tell him you feel less attracted to him because he is gaining weight. Will be an argument but at least he will know he needs to get in shape

[devin45k]

What the fuk ever happened to marriage being for better or for worse? Homeboy isn't cheating on you or beating the fuk out of you is he? Just love him and be positive. He needs to want to change. Just because you ALL OF SUDDEN change doesn't mean he has to. Talk to him, share your concerns, and work through them.

I would give this same advice to a married man who's wife is getting fat. You need to EXHAUST all efforts before you go and throw in the towel.

There is also a point were people take that part for advantage.

[mydawgs]

What the fuk ever happened to marriage being for better or for worse? Homeboy isn't cheating on you or beating the fuk out of you is he? Just love him and be positive. He needs to want to change. Just because you ALL OF SUDDEN change doesn't mean he has to. Talk to him, share your concerns, and work through them.

I would give this same advice to a married man who's wife is getting fat. You need to EXHAUST all efforts before you go and throw in the towel.

Disagree...my husband and I will celebrate our 30th in May.....it is all about change and adapting to it. Sex is foundational in a healthy marriage and if his appearance or hers is working to negate that it needs to be addressed. They both have to be happy. He needs to address his wife's needs.

[BIGrob84]

Disagree...my husband and I will celebrate our 30th in May.....it is all about change and adapting to it. Sex is foundational in a healthy marriage and if his appearance or hers is working to negate that it needs to be addressed. They both have to be happy. He needs to address his wife's needs.

Maybe I didn't communicate my concern correctly. My grief with this thread and the way it is presented is in the fact that she is already talking about leaving her husband. For that to even be an option this soon after her transformation shows where her priorities are. I am a huge advocate for changing/growing with your significant other, but one must understand that it is not that simple. She became passionate about something and is now making threats based on her change. All I'm saying is she needs to have a talk with her husband and make a decent attempt at being a positive spouse before threats start flying.

I know she didn't mention giving her husband an ultimatum (yet). But her responses definitely show that to be an option.

[davesterrr]

thanks you guys.. and no i wont cheat on him because i would never do that.. if anything leave but i would hate to do that

So you basically saying you have 4 kids together. You're married.
But you're willing to divorce him, break a family in pieces, ruin 4 children having a normal life with 2 parents,
just because your husband is gaining weight?

You're willing to do all of this so you can suck on another guys dick who isn't overweight?
Another dick is worth breaking up your family?

This is exactly why people on here are against marriages.
Ever think that your husband is tired after working all day?
Ever think your husband loves you for who you are, being his wife and the mother of his children?
Ever think you should love your husband no matter what till death parts you, like you said in your wedding vows?
Or are you so shallow that you're willing to ruin your husbands life and those of your kids, just because you want to fuk some fit dude?

You shouldn't even suggest leaving him.
What if he gets sick, do you leave him then too?
Fukking sloots gonna sloot.
Negged.

Ps: I don't get mad often, but you're a fukking kunt.