TIP: Don't act like a woman when you get rejected!

[SniperChick]

See bottom for cliffnotes.*

LOL, I felt like sharing this with you guys. I went out with this guy on a date thursday (know him through friends) and thought I'd give him a shot (even though I was highly in doubt that I was attracted --don't get me wrong, he's attractive from a completely objective point of view, but his personality is too 'wuss'-ish, and old...plus he wasn't confident). I tried to bail from the date a few days before but he accussed me of 'running' (EMO) so I did it just to prove him wrong. The entire time I was uncomfortable/annoyed and what's worse is he thought everything was great and I could tell he really liked me (kept reffering to 'the next time we go out'). Anyway, at the end of the date I gave him a hug and said thanks, but he just waited there expectantly like a little boy lol, he then asked me 'what I thought of him' so I said I wasn't interested. ANYway, here's the e-mail I received yesterday. (Lesson here is to NOT act this way, EVER, seriously!):

"Hey SniperChick,

i had a really great time with you on thursday evening; i had so much fun being with you disecting 'the messengers' like crazy...it was fun until i walked you to your door. there's no feeling quite like going on a date with someone you really like, having a great time, only to find out she only likes you as a friend at the end. unfortunately for me, this has been the case with almost every single woman i've ever been interested in. i get to know a girl, i become interested, i feel that 'something' for them; but alas they are incapable of feeling that 'something' for me.


i really like you SniperChick, i think your funny, smart, beautiful, sexy and your just as crazy as i am in so many of the same ways. we have so much in common and we're a great match in terms of how what we're both looking for in a relationship fits together. having said all that, why is it that i feel that "something" for you but you dont for me? (i know your gonna say 'its not you its me' 'your a totally nice guy but...' 'i have issues in my life that conflict with...' 'i'm not ready for a committment now' 'i have a crush on someone else' 'just think we'd be better off as friends...'

i've heard them all before so many times. for once i'm just looking for a cold and harsh answer like, 'you have a crooked nose' 'you chew your food too loud' 'your acne is ugly' 'your arms aren't big enough' 'you have bad breath' or how bout this one, "you were too available for me, it was too easy to 'get you' which drove all the fun of the challenge out of the dating experience"

because i've heard all the lame reasons so many times before by every girl i've been interested in, i cant stand the 'chase' anymore which is WHY i make myself 'available or easy to obtain' if you will. i'm trying to bypass all that superficial crap and get to the REAL stuff. i'm not as easy to get as i may appear to be, i just know exactly what i'm looking for in a person and when i find it i go after it. i dont play hard to get waiting for it to come to me and risk missing the opportunity for something really special.

Anyways, i'm sorry if i'm coming off as a crazy obsessive 'nut job' here. the point i'm trying to make is that i really like you and i think we're a great match, i just dont understand why you dont feel the same way and thats what i'm trying to figure out i guess. when i was walking you to your door my heart was pounding cuz i was nervous about whether or not i should give you a kiss goodbye. when you said 'just friends'...it was really disappointing and it felt to me like you were running again cuz of how much fun we had that night. i was thinking of kissing you anyways to see if that would "light the fire" inside you and right now i think i should have.

i really like you SniperChick and i want to be with you. take a chance with me you might just be surprised."

Running because of how much fun we had! Haha, RIGHT.*Sigh* More of a woman than I am...

Cliffnotes:
-Guy really likes me, I don't like him but agree to a go out anyway because of my pride lol
-Go out on date: really crappy, he thinks it went great
-I tell him at the end of the date that I'm not interested, think to myself with a sigh of relief 'that's that'
-He sends me an e-mail whining like a little girl...
-I contemplate throwing up in disgust.

[Dipset007]

whr u @ in canada. we can go out n drink cell-tech together (no sparta)

oh and i have a question, since ur a girl sometimes when i talk to some random girl this is how it goes


me: "hey"
she: "helo"
me: "watsup"
she: "nothing"
me: "ok"
n then thrs silence.... wht shld i do in that long silent situation

[SniperChick]

Here's my response for anyone who actually read the whole thing and wants a laugh (god his delicate ego is probably obliterated...*shrug*) :

"So 'randomname',

You seem to be confused a lot. Maybe I can help you.

First thing first, these girls you're interested in (in my case at least) are not -incapable- of being attracted to you. They simply aren't. Point settled.

As to that, here are a few tips. Coming off as desperate will not attract women, in fact, it's rather repulsive. Also, listing off paper qualities as reasoning for attraction is just sad. Debate all you'd like; it. isn't. there.

You say: 'why is it that i feel that "something" for you but you dont for me?'
Rule #1 of the real world: Life isn't fair. Your attraction to someone else doesn't equate to an attraction on their part. Stop behaving like a child and deal with it.

Unfortunately for you, you were wrong in your assumption that I would spew excuses to explain why I'm not attracted to you too. You say you want cold and harsh- my pleasure.

First, you remind me of an old man. What you intend as flirtation comes off as lecherous and awkward. You're also too fragile. If you ask me a question like you did at the end of the night (i.e. my opinion of you), you'll get an answer. Try to conceal your hurt; looking like a kicked dog does nothing for your appeal.

On that note, dissecting feelings won't change them, not yours, and assuredly not mine. It's like trying to dig your way -out- of a whole. So please, for the sake of any future women you meet, but more importantly for the very preservation of your self respect; stop. It's embarrassing.

Finally, kissing a girl in the hopes that it will 'light the fire' when she is clearly uninterested is pathetic. A real man needs force nothing on a woman- if he kisses her, it would be because she -wanted- him to. Learn the difference. Otherwise you could end up with a crushed windpipe.

Sincerely,

SniperChick"

Lol...he hasn't responded, I'd be shocked if he did!

EDIT: Don't know why when I originally copied and pasted all of my " ' " were coming out as "?"...oh well, fixed now.

[SniperChick]

Originally Posted by Dipset007

whr u @ in canada. we can go out n drink cell-tech together (no sparta)

Lol "no sparta"? That's a new one. >_<

[WCC]

LOL, what a load of drivel.
that guy sounds like a total wuss; probably has issues too - is he an emo?

[UpcomingBB]

Well it was worth a shot from his side? (writing the e-mail) wasn't it? Can't really blame him for being attracted+interested in you. Although he does indeed seem kinda lame

[Dipset007]

Originally Posted by SniperChick

Lol "no sparta"? That's a new one. >_<

NEW 1? THATS SPARTAAAA
(watchthe 300 trailer)

n 1 more question........
so when u go out with a guy, what do u expect him to do? wid u

[mcxk]

OWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD!!! I live in Ottawa and I can confirm that 95% of the Males here are like that.

[user23960508710783]

Looking back, he'll remember this experience as one of the defining moments of when he knew he was gay.

A few more emails like that, and that sensitivity will be knocked right out of him.

[Violator009]

First u thought he was a wuss and then u went out with him just because he said u were running, instead of toying with him u shouldve just put your foot down and let him know ur not interested and the reason.

But u strung him along to fuel your ego on a date u knew u werent gonna enjoy, and then u come on here to bust his balls, u got some huge ones girl, how would u feel if a guy u like did that to you?

[luckylynch]

so you have pride ?

You dont like this guy but go out with him because you got pride and self respect for yourself ?

Most people with pride wont go out with someone they dont like /

Sounds like you you don't have pride nor any respect for other people. Obviously, you leading him on. And obviously, you want to bring him down to your level

Well, if you would stop playing games and act a little more classy then maybe you would attract someone on your level--

jesus no wonder you have so many problems--

[newz-]

haha, loser

[sHaDyOneDeath]

Originally Posted by SniperChick

Here's my response for anyone who actually read the whole thing and wants a laugh (god his delicate ego is probably obliterated...*shrug*) :

"So 'randomname',

You seem to be confused a lot. Maybe I can help you.

First thing first, these girls you?re interested in (in my case at least) are not -incapable- of being attracted to you. They simply aren?t. Point settled.

As to that, here are a few tips. Coming off as desperate will not attract women, in fact, it?s rather repulsive. Also, listing off paper qualities as reasoning for attraction is just sad. Debate all you?d like; it. isn?t. there.

You say: ?why is it that i feel that "something" for you but you dont for me??
Rule #1 of the real world: Life isn?t fair. Your attraction to someone else doesn?t equate to an attraction on their part. Stop behaving like a child and deal with it.

Unfortunately for you, you were wrong in your assumption that I would spew excuses to explain why I?m not attracted to you too. You say you want cold and harsh- my pleasure.

First, you remind me of an old man. What you intend as flirtation comes off as lecherous and awkward. You?re also too fragile. If you ask me a question like you did at the end of the night (i.e. my opinion of you), you?ll get an answer. Try to conceal your hurt; looking like a kicked dog does nothing for your appeal.

On that note, dissecting feelings won?t change them, not yours, and assuredly not mine. It?s like trying to dig your way -out- of a whole. So please, for the sake of any future women you meet, but more importantly for the very preservation of your self respect; stop. It?s embarrassing.

Finally, kissing a girl in the hopes that it will ?light the fire? when she is clearly uninterested is pathetic. A real man needs force nothing on a woman- if he kisses her, it would be because she -wanted- him to. Learn the difference. Otherwise you could end up with a crushed windpipe.

Sincerely,

SniperChick"

Lol...he hasn't responded, I'd be shocked if he did!

Wow, strong bitch.

You and I would get along just fine.

[luckylynch]

Originally Posted by Violator009

First u thought he was a wuss and then u went out with him just because he said u were running, instead of toying with him u shouldve just put your foot down and let him know ur not interested and the reason.

But u strung him along to fuel your ego on a date u knew u werent gonna enjoy, and then u come on here to bust his balls, u got some huge ones girl, how would u feel if a guy u like did that to you?

see thats the problem with alot of women; they have alot of drama in their lives and just dont get it---How come guys are so mean to me? And then they lower themselves to playing games and getting "even" woohoo im a vindictive b and must turn psycho--

I dont think you get it? so im going to say this once---your the creator of the drama in your life so just stop it and show some class and then maybe people will respect you a little better--

[mcxk]

Originally Posted by luckylynch

see thats the problem with alot of women; they have alot of drama in their lives and just dont get it---How come guys are so mean to me? And then they lower themselves to playing games and getting "even" woohoo im a vindictive b and must turn psycho--

I dont think you get it? so im going to say this once---your the creator of the drama in your life so just stop it and show some class and then maybe people will respect you a little better--

good points repped

[RickRoss]

Damn, you were pretty harsh on the guy. He sounds like a puss, but ****, you shouldn't have even went out w/ him. You haven't heard back from him because he probably killed himself.

[Aramosc76]

.....waiting for OP's response should be interesting

[Violator009]

Originally Posted by luckylynch

see thats the problem with alot of women; they have alot of drama in their lives and just dont get it---How come guys are so mean to me? And then they lower themselves to playing games and getting "even" woohoo im a vindictive b and must turn psycho--

I dont think you get it? so im going to say this once---your the creator of the drama in your life so just stop it and show some class and then maybe people will respect you a little better--

True shes a little girl, she aint even a woman and talking like she got years of experience with men, i hope SC thinks alittle more before playing foolish games like that in the future.....

[RickRoss]

This is the type of experience that'll make a guy go 'I'm f*cking over every girl i ever meet. F*ck this pussy ****.'

[sHaDyOneDeath]

Originally Posted by RickRoss

This is the type of experience that'll make a guy go 'I'm f*cking over every girl i ever meet. F*ck this pussy ****.'

Nothing wrong with that.

[Aramosc76]

so true....so true

[TricepsNGirls]

He sounds like a nice guy - a little too nice, but not worthy of spite and arrogance. You obviously loved every moment of this, which is exactly why you went back.

The nice guys will run out one day. The older, smarter women are going to marry them up and turn them into their doormats. Then you're left with the *******s who are going to be much more ruthless than you.

[bttrthnb4]

Originally Posted by TricepsNGirls

He sounds like a nice guy - a little too nice, but not worthy of spite and arrogance. You obviously loved every moment of this, which is exactly why you went back.

The nice guys will run out one day. The older, smarter women are going to marry them up and turn them into their doormats. Then you're left with the *******s who are going to be much more ruthless than you.

Amen to that. Glad i always had a sweet spot for the nice guy. Wouldn't know what to do without him

No wonder men are so harsh about women on here. Screw your pride....what ever happened to putting others first?

[wimpking]

don't go out with the guy if you hate the guy so much that you have to post his private message to you on MISC. wtf, I'm not sure who has a worse issue, the guy (clingy/wanty puss) or you (heartless, showboating, and wanting attention).

[Snookems]

SniperChick, It's safe to say all of us posting in this thread acted like this one day, and look how we act now. I remember back in the day when I did the same thing, let all the emotions go to one chick who I was "Friend zoned" for years. She replied with a hurtful letter such as yours and it was a blow for me. Now I find myself incapable of "Opening up". Yes, I by far 100000000% improved my game and can snag women I want that night, but still you don't have to be so hurtful.

[1earedELEPHANT]

I've always been under the impression its pretty easy to tell if the date is goin well or not...there's no need to have any surprise at the end if **** doesnt happen...

you need to find dudes a little more alpha..and instead of saying how your very open and don't mind hurting the dude....why would you go out with the dude for your "pride" from the get go??


just my .02

[peng]

TIP: Lose the bitterness. Perhaps then you can act with a little class and attract decent men.

The guy may be a wuss, but still a decent person. That puts him a step ahead of you.

I don't know what's worse, the fact that you lead him on like that, or the fact that you enjoyed it so much that you just needed to share with the world.

[SniperChick]

Originally Posted by Violator009

First u thought he was a wuss and then u went out with him just because he said u were running, instead of toying with him u shouldve just put your foot down and let him know ur not interested and the reason.

But u strung him along to fuel your ego on a date u knew u werent gonna enjoy, and then u come on here to bust his balls, u got some huge ones girl, how would u feel if a guy u like did that to you?

Perhaps I didn't explain the situation enough for you to comment, because most of those assumptions are wrong (but that's my fault). I told him previous to going on the date that I didn't think we had chemistry in that way and it was probably for the best to stay friends. I tried to be as honest and direct as possible, and believe me I'd been nothing but polite as well as pleasant on the phone/in person. He then practially accused me (as though I had commited a crime --more than likely emotionally enmeshed with previous rejections) that I wasn't giving him a fair chance. I rethought things and against my best judgement agreed, I had tried to stop things beforehand in order to not string him along/toy with him and I did stay open during the date, but I could tell as the date progressed that things weren't going to work out. I told him (politely and as forthright as possible) that I wasn't feeling that type of connection at the end of the date and I thought he had accepted that, even if it hurt a bit (my explanation was a 180 from what you've read of my e-mail, but I'll elaborate further shortly). It's not like he was oblivious and then I turned him down harshly to give myself an ego boost. I debated posting on here but decided on doing so to give some a laugh to be perfectly candid. I've read many a time things like this, and while it may seem insensitive to you, it is what it is- a miscellaneous section on an internet forum. Yes, I came here to give a few laughs at his oblivious expense, but you'd have a difficult time convincing me I was a monster for doing so.

Originally Posted by luckylynch

so you have pride ?

You dont like this guy but go out with him because you got pride and self respect for yourself ?

Most people with pride wont go out with someone they dont like /

Sounds like you you don't have pride nor any respect for other people. Obviously, you leading him on. And obviously, you want to bring him down to your level

Well, if you would stop playing games and act a little more classy then maybe you would attract someone on your level--

jesus no wonder you have so many problems--

Mmhmm, that's me, a complete bitch with a whole bunch of psychological problems who seeks nothing more in life than to degrade and humiliate others. Look, I get where you're coming from. I suppose reading that objectively I would have a similar reaction to you. You'll note above that there were more details than what you were initially able to respond to, not leaving you at fault of course, but it does change things. I never lead him on, I went on the date to honestly see how things went. I stated previous to the date that I wasn't interested in him and I thought it'd be best to cancel. He pretty much demanded I give him a chance (which in retrospect really irks me), and I acquiesced. So I did what was rare for me, I gave it a chance against my best judgement. When I realized the situation was the same at the end of the night I stated it. To then get this e-mail laced with defensiveness and an over-all lack of open mindedness to my reasonings (as though no matter what answer I gave, I was a shallow human being. Why is it one must be a victim in their own eyes? If he had asked what I felt he was lacking and could improve on, I would have told him helpfully, and with as muct tact as possible. The problem was he didn't seem to be able to accept that it could have anything to do with him.)

Originally Posted by sHaDyOneDeath

Wow, strong bitch.

You and I would get along just fine.

Hmm...I should also comment on the severity of my e-mail. I realize since that's all you guys could read you more than likely assume I was(/am) a complete bitch who was harsh all along. The tone of this e-mail was mainly due to his last statement. I felt really uncomfortable when he said (after having been told I only liked him as a friend) that he should have kissed me anyway. Life's not a movie or some rediculous romance novel, if a girl says she's not interested and you kiss her anyway, what is that to you? To me it's a violation, regardless of how quickly it would have been settled (i.e. me pushing him the **** off). That notion quickly turned to anger as I was composing. It may have been harsh, but I don't regret it.

Originally Posted by luckylynch

see thats the problem with alot of women; they have alot of drama in their lives and just dont get it---How come guys are so mean to me? And then they lower themselves to playing games and getting "even" woohoo im a vindictive b and must turn psycho--

I dont think you get it? so im going to say this once---your the creator of the drama in your life so just stop it and show some class and then maybe people will respect you a little better--

Lol...people respect me. I respect myself. Simple.

Your arguements are unfounded on my regard, and while there's no way around it, you may want to look at this and other situations in the future with a bit more perspective. Think about it --you're basing a complete analysis of me as a whole person on a simple thread I posted on a bodybuilding forum. I understand and completely agree that there are many women like that, and I won't try to sway you further because obviously you're going to take my perspective as bias, but I know I'm not that type.

I appologize if I offended anyone, this was for my amusement, and yes --at his expense. Will he ever see it? No. Are there things like this and worse posted daily? Yes. To be perfectly honest I'm surprised (and impressed) at the maturity of some of the responses given. While to you this may all appear like new found insight, I had already thought on it. Just didn't think any of you would care for all of my reasonings. *Shrugs* The more to you all I guess.

[mult68]

Originally Posted by SniperChick

Perhaps I didn't explain the situation enough for you to comment, because most of those assumptions are wrong (but that's my fault). I told him previous to going on the date that I didn't think we had chemistry in that way and it was probably for the best to stay friends. I tried to be as honest and direct as possible, and believe me I'd been nothing but polite as well as pleasant on the phone/in person. He then practially accused me (as though I had commited a crime --more than likely emotionally enmeshed with previous rejections) that I wasn't giving him a fair chance. I rethought things and against my best judgement agreed, I had tried to stop things beforehand in order to not string him along/toy with him and I did stay open during the date, but I could tell as the date progressed that things weren't going to work out. I told him (politely and as forthright as possible) that I wasn't feeling that type of connection at the end of the date and I thought he had accepted that, even if it hurt a bit (my explanation was a 180 from what you've read of my e-mail, but I'll elaborate further shortly). It's not like he was oblivious and then I turned him down harshly to give myself an ego boost. I debated posting on here but decided on doing so to give some a laugh to be perfectly candid. I've read many a time things like this, and while it may seem insensitive to you, it is what it is- a miscellaneous section on an internet forum. Yes, I came here to give a few laughs at his oblivious expense, but you'd have a difficult time convincing me I was a monster for doing so.



Mmhmm, that's me, a complete bitch with a whole bunch of psychological problems who seeks nothing more in life than to degrade and humiliate others. Look, I get where you're coming from. I suppose reading that objectively I would have a similar reaction to you. You'll note above that there were more details than what you were initially able to respond to, not leaving you at fault of course, but it does change things. I never lead him on, I went on the date to honestly see how things went. I stated previous to the date that I wasn't interested in him and I thought it'd be best to cancel. He pretty much demanded I give him a chance (which in retrospect really irks me), and I acquiesced. So I did what was rare for me, I gave it a chance against my best judgement. When I realized the situation was the same at the end of the night I stated it. To then get this e-mail laced with defensiveness and an over-all lack of open mindedness to my reasonings (as though no matter what answer I gave, I was a shallow human being. Why is it one must be a victim in their own eyes? If he had asked what I felt he was lacking and could improve on, I would have told him helpfully, and with as muct tact as possible. The problem was he didn't seem to be able to accept that it could have anything to do with him.)



Hmm...I should also comment on the severity of my e-mail. I realize since that's all you guys could read you more than likely assume I was(/am) a complete bitch who was harsh all along. The tone of this e-mail was mainly due to his last statement. I felt really uncomfortable when he said (after having been told I only liked him as a friend) that he should have kissed me anyway. Life's not a movie or some rediculous romance novel, if a girl says she's not interested and you kiss her anyway, what is that to you? To me it's a violation, regardless of how quickly it would have been settled (i.e. me pushing him the **** off). That notion quickly turned to anger as I was composing. It may have been harsh, but I don't regret it.



Lol...people respect me. I respect myself. Simple.

Your arguements are unfounded on my regard, and while there's no way around it, you may want to look at this and other situations in the future with a bit more perspective. Think about it --you're basing a complete analysis of me as a whole person on a simple thread I posted on a bodybuilding forum. I understand and completely agree that there are many women like that, and I won't try to sway you further because obviously you're going to take my perspective as bias, but I know I'm not that type.

I appologize if I offended anyone, this was for my amusement, and yes --at his expense. Will he ever see it? No. Are there things like this and worse posted daily? Yes. To be perfectly honest I'm surprised (and impressed) at the maturity of some of the responses given. While to you this may all appear like new found insight, I had already thought on it. Just didn't think any of you would care for all of my reasonings. *Shrugs* The more to you all I guess.

Colin?

I read every message in this thread but this one is too long.

But yes hes a puss and youre a bi*ch....but bi*ches are usually fun to hang out with and mess aroudn with.

[ispy]

lmao! thread of the week.

p.s. get a restraining order for that guy.