Your thoughts on promise rings

[michpc]

I didn't grow up in the US so be patient with me here, ok? Here's how I have always seen the development of a relationship:


- Hey want to grab a coup of coffee?
- How about we stop sleeping with other people?
- Want to move in together?
- Will you marry me?

Took the words right off my fingertips.

[IrishLassie78]

I've always thought the concept of a promise ring was asinine. Either you love each other or you don't. Either you're committed or you're not. To me promise rings are for high school kids who are probably in their first relationship and are love with the idea of being in love, or for people who have been given an ultimatum to sh*t or get off the pot, but don't have the balls to do either. So, in most cases, the guy gives the girl some kind of ring to shut her up so she sticks around until he gets the balls to do one thing or the other.

[IrishLassie78]

Yeah, as long as its a healthy relationship, why does a ring and a bit of paper matter.

I think a lot of it still boils down to social norms etc, but real love is real love

Totally 100% agree.

[Botika]

We don't do promise rings in Australia. Even with engagement rings.... Unless you have actually set a date to get married up they don't really mean that much either. You are either in a relationship or married. Gold and diamonds don't really make a difference to that.

[GreekyBeth]

Hi, female misc. I read a thread earlier about a guy giving his girlfriend a promise ring and I wanted to get a female perspective.

What do promise rings mean to you?

I've never understood them---but to each their own. I'd take diamond studs in lieu of a promise ring anyway, lol.

[firely]

Yeah, but no.

Just no. I'd rather not be so insecure that I require an outward symbol of the level of commitment within my relationship at every given stage. And it's not romantic either. Too much sentimentality for a cynic like me.

[aristomeow]

Whoa....my whole wedding set was less than $1000, before taxes. Here's to not spending that much on rocks

Promise rings are very sweet, as long as you're both in high school

This.

Unless I'm allowed to tell people I have a fiance, I am not wearing some little cubic zirconia thing on my hand. Nuh uh no sirreee.

[penny0527]

I don't really get promise rings. Never did anything like it myself. My husband and I met, were engaged a year and a half after that and married 6 months after that.

For whoever said marriage is just a piece of paper you are very wrong.

[DmZy]

sounds beta as hell

[mcmoon]

Right of high school gave my gf a promise ring because honestly I wanted to be out of college before I got married.....we stayed together through college and I proposed our senior year of college and got married about 3 months before we graduated because we decided to move away but wanted to have the wedding where all our family could be there....just had our 1 year anniversary the 28th of January

But to each their own

[Fawnl]

Lol if this is your attitude, I would want to put a promise ring on your finger too vs an engagement ring.

brb not sure if girl wants to be with me or is one of those crazy girls too caught up in the social hype of marriage and commitment, so better make her wait as long as possible and give her a promise ring just to rustle her jimmies.

If a girl needs marriage and commitment right away, and isn't willing to wait as long as I want to, then immediate red flag and I dump her



edit: not trying to bash anyone's opinion or intrude on the female misc. If I'm being out of hand, call me out and I'll delete my posts. Thanks!

You want to put a promise ring on my finger?

What the fuk did I just read?

[dsm246]

I guess I just don't get these. If you are too young or not sure enough to get engaged then why not just continue to date until you are sure? Back in my day (yeah, I'm that old) your boyfriend just gave you his high school or college ring to wear as a symbol that you were together and the relationship was serious. Has the promise ring replaced that? Is it a step between? They definitely seem like a teenage thing to me. Man, do I feel old right now.

EDIT: Oh and once we were a bit older the universal sign of a serious relationship was if you had keys to each others places and designated closet space. :-)

[imsotheman]

I guess I just don't get these. If you are too young or not sure enough to get engaged then why not just continue to date until you are sure? Back in my day (yeah, I'm that old) your boyfriend just gave you his high school or college ring to wear as a symbol that you were together and the relationship was serious. Has the promise ring replaced that? Is it a step between? They definitely seem like a teenage thing to me. Man, do I feel old right now.

EDIT: Oh and once we were a bit older the universal sign of a serious relationship was if you had keys to each others places and designated closet space. :-)

Yes promise rings have replaced lettermans and school rings... I gave my previous girlfriend a promise ring... we broke up a year later... glad I did that instead of getting engaged.. I didnt call it a promise ring though thats gay... I just bought her a really nice ring and gave it to her...

[Ang123]

Promise ring? Never heard of it. Thought you meant Purity rings there for a minute. I love those. I metal detect around schoolyards and find a lot of silver & white gold purity rings laying around. I suspect the girls toss them on purpose. lol

[Lioness27]

I have one and I love it. My BF gave it to me for our 1 year anniversary. He wanted to make sure I knew we were committed and that he was committed to me even though we are not at a time where we can get engaged yet. He wrote a lovely poem and read it to me before he gave it to me. I guess it just depends on the person and the relationship.

[aristomeow]

You want to put a promise ring on my finger?

What the fuk did I just read?

I think he likes you Fawn.

[yummycow]

I thought promise rings were something that Christians wore to show their commitment to not getting laid, but obviously I got that wrong.

From what I've read in this thread they do sound a bit silly to me.

[taiga1]

I thought promise rings were something that Christians wore to show their commitment to not getting laid, but obviously I got that wrong.

From what I've read in this thread they do sound a bit silly to me.

I think you are thinking of "True Love Waits"

I copied this from Wikipedia...

True Love Waits (TLW) is an international Christian group that promotes sexual abstinence outside of marriage for teenagers and college students. TLW was created in April, 1993 by the Southern Baptists,[1] and is sponsored by LifeWay Christian Resources. It is based on conservative Christian views of human sexuality that require one to be faithful to one's husband or wife, even before marriage.

The True Love Waits pledge states: "Believing that true love waits, I make a commitment to God, myself, my family, my friends, my future mate and my future children to be sexually abstinent from this day until the day I enter a biblical marriage relationship." In addition, they promote sexual purity, which encompasses not only abstaining from intercourse before marriage, but also abstaining from sexual thoughts, sexual touching, pornography, and actions that are known to lead to sexual arousal.

In the first year of the campaign, over 102,000 young people signed the pledge, which was also taken up by other church groups including the Roman Catholic Church and Assemblies of God. The campaign has continued to spread across the US, making use of occasions such as Valentine's Day to gain attention.

(i was a part of this statistic)

The efficacy of the program has been questioned based on a 2003 study showing that 6 out of 10 college students who had taken the pledge had broken it, and of the 40% who identified themselves as abstaining from intercourse, 55% acknowledged having participated in oral sex.

(aaaannnnnd, i was also part of this statistic)

My parents thought I was a whackadoo for signing the thing in the first place.

[Ang123]

I thought promise rings were something that Christians wore to show their commitment to not getting laid, but obviously I got that wrong.

From what I've read in this thread they do sound a bit silly to me.

Nope that's called a Purity ring. They try to force Christian girls to wear them, but not the boys.

[yogadancefit123]

Took the words right off my fingertips.

Hahaha God bless Amurica

[sy2502]

Nope that's called a Purity ring. They try to force Christian girls to wear them, but not the boys.

Why doesn't this surprise me one bit?

[mrshester]

Nope that's called a Purity ring. They try to force Christian girls to wear them, but not the boys.

Not necessarily. Boys wear Purity rings also...we had a "True Love Waits" program when I was in a church youth group. Just as many boys as girls signed up for it, and no one forced them. Not saying they all kept it, but they weren't forced into...and not every one participated.

[Wyomann]

Not necessarily. Boys wear Purity rings also...we had a "True Love Waits" program when I was in a church youth group. Just as many boys as girls signed up for it, and no one forced them. Not saying they all kept it, but they weren't forced into...and not every one participated.

The ultimate slap in the face would be in they took off the purity ring and used it as a cock ring while breaking their vow.

[sy2502]

The ultimate slap in the face would be in they took off the purity ring and used it as a cock ring while breaking their vow.

I like your thinking!

[Richy P]

Promise ring = Teen Misc

[latebloomingmom]

I like your thinking!

better have either really big fingers or a really small....

[kimm4]

Promise ring = Man openining his wallet to spend $$ on something stupid.

[latebloomingmom]

Promise ring = Man openining his wallet to spend $$ on something stupid.

"baby I promise that someday...down the line...sometime....I am gonna make some kind of a committment to you....trust me "



"now how much this cost? ...no not that one with a diamond...that one over there...that little puny one"

[SimmerDownBrah]

A few guys at my school used promise rings as a tactic to "assure" girls that wanted to save themselves for marriage, that they would one day marry them, so it would be ok to have sex.

Of course the guys had no intention of lasting more than a few months with these girls, let alone marrying them.

[dsm246]

"baby I promise that someday...down the line...sometime....I am gonna make some kind of a committment to you....trust me "



"now how much this cost? ...no not that one with a diamond...that one over there...that little puny one"

I'm laughing so hard right now.

Tragically, "You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to latebloomingmom again."