GF gave me an ultimatum

[itsclif]

So I'm crazy about my girlfriend, she's really great and we have amazing chemistry. However, she's forcing me to pick between my female best friend and her.

Here's some background: Me and my female best friend have been really close for years. We actually dated for like three months but decided to cut it off because we just weren't meant to be together. We both mutually decided it was best for us to remain friends. I've lost my feelings for my best friend and I think she has too. We never flirt or anything with each other. We just act like brother and sister. I tell her everything and she does the same. She's been here for me and is one of the most important people in my life. My gf feels threatened by her because she feels like I'm too close to my ex and that I'll eventually hurt her. I kept reassuring her that I wouldn't go back with my best friend and that I wouldn't hurt her. So, she gave me an ultimatum: Cut all my communication with my best friend and stick with her, or lose her forever.

A part of me wants to appease my gf because I do love her. However, giving me this ultimatum shows that she has a lack of trust in me and is extremely jealous.

Misc, if you were in my position, what would you do?



So I'm crazy about my girlfriend, she's really great and we have amazing chemistry. However, she's forcing me to pick between my female best friend and her.

Here's some background: Me and my female best friend have been really close for years. We actually dated for like three months but decided to cut it off because we just weren't meant to be together. We both mutually decided it was best for us to remain friends. I've lost my feelings for my best friend and I think she has too. We never flirt or anything with each other. We just act like brother and sister. I tell her everything and she does the same. She's been here for me and is one of the most important people in my life. My gf feels threatened by her because she feels like I'm too close to my ex and that I'll eventually hurt her. I kept reassuring her that I wouldn't go back with my best friend and that I wouldn't hurt her. So, she gave me an ultimatum: Cut all my communication with my best friend forever and stick with her, or lose her forever.

A part of me wants to appease my gf because I do love her. However, giving me this ultimatum shows that she has a lack of trust in me and is extremely jealous.

Misc, if you were in my position, what would you do?




UPDATE:

I sent her a message this morning.. In short in said:

I havent hid anything back from you, been honest from the beginning, told you who she was from the beginning and told you how important she was to me. I've given you no reason not to trust me
If you want to end this relationship because of your trust issues and your insecurities, then go on ahead
I know your past and i know that other guys have hurt you before.. but if you break this relationship up because of me being honest and straight up with you, thats your choice
If you do move on and end up getting hurt by a guy who's just gonna lie to you and hurt you again, dont come running back to me... because an ex stays an ex for a reason and i wouldn't ever get back with an ex

Awaiting response



UPDATE #2:

This is her response:

"Ok, wow, what a way to wake up. I never said you gotta cut her out of your life, i just said you gotta limit yourself & it's not that i dont trust you. you guys had something in the past. Thats what bothers me the most. I thought about it last night to & and i felt bad cause everything i told you, i just want you to limit yourself, not cut her out of your life completely. Cause if one day she needs you, your gonna be there for you. And trust me I wont end us for a stupid reason like this"


She's feeling bad and probably didnt expect me to reject her ultimatium... But now that I did, she probably realized she was gonna lose me.

Couple lessons:
Never take a girls ultimatum because then they're gonna feel empowered and in control. If you give in to one, they have you by the balls.


Cliffs:
Have a best friend who is a female that I dated once for three months but have no feelings for
Girlfriend is jealous of best friend
GF tells me I got to cut off all communication with best friend. Then says it either me or her
I call her bluff, saying that if she wants to end the relationship based on your trust issues and insecurities, go on ahead
GF says she feels bad and doesn't wanna lose me over this

[drvillain]

lol idk. I understand where your gf is coming from though, especially since you guys dated.

[Tweedurr]

Stop being 12, and get a guy best friend like a grown ass man. I would do the same if I was your gf. I don't have time for silly games.

[Tune5k]

pics of both girls, then we can continue this conversation

[stevesteve12]

no pix huh

[FearThisjake]

read first sentence, looked at age, lol'd

OP, you're twenty. Break up with your gf and smash as many as you can while you can

[ShredMethod]

theres nothing misc can tell you that will change anything. youre either gonna choose one or the other, your girl seems like the type who wont put up with it and trust me she wont. and if she does she will make your life miserable

[Kittycat26]

My best friend is female. Any girl I've ever dated had to be okay with my best friend. If not, then I can't do the relationship. Not worth hurting a friend who has always been there for you.

[xvsteve]

your girl is immature.

[Tweedurr]

Oh, and

[Aamon]

Your girlfriend sounds emotionally unstable and is clearly easily jealous...unfortunately relationships with people like that hardly work out. Picking your friend is the logical answer.

[Celticsfan94]

Inb4 the Misc says you cant be friends with females, if I was in that situation I would try to comfort your gf and calmly explain to her that you and your best friend have a brother sister relationship and you've known each other for a long time, then tell her that if she cant trust you then the relationship wont work out.

But I do see where she is coming from.

[MetalMonarch]

age:20, probably not gonna marry this one op. keep the friend.

[J_A24]

Would you like your GF to have a straight guy best friend?

And stop lying to yourself about your "best friend", you know you still like her and she still likes you. Your GF is not retarded.

[danklord]

bone her

[dirtymcbride]

If anyone ever has to tell you who you can and cant be friends with without you considering any of their potential feelings, than you shouldnt be with them.
Srs.

[ydob]

You post pics of both the gf and the best friend is what you should do OP

[KurlBrah]

Stop being 12, and get a guy best friend like a grown ass man.

This.
"all women are sluts and liars" - Gandhi

[rickbro]

dayum your gf is alpha as fuark.

she wears the pants in this relationship.

[ScouseMark90]

Didn't read just show pic of gf.

[TheSaltyAngus]

buy a chastity belt and give gf key

problem solved


semi srs

[Club27]

im with your chick on this one srs.

[thewiz8807]

GL Bro, you're going to need it.

[Zackad]

that is actually a pretty tough situation OP. How long exactly have you and female best friend been best friends?


Ultimately though, your gf shouldn't be making you choose between her and a friend, although her worries are justified. I would say to stick with the friend (assuming you truly do consider her a best friend, and not just your best female friend), and date other girls. You're too young to be sacrificing friends for a relationship.

[builder95]

Lose a life long friend V.S. Lose a 3 month Girl Friend
hmmm tough choice The relationship won't last forever I gurantee but you and your best friend very well can.
Homies>Hoes

[coffey06]

It's not an unreasonable request, OP. Good luck in your decision.

[EpicLevelWizard]

Break up with GF, srs.

[JanesLastResort]

dump srs.














































































lol not srs, but dump anyway just for the lulz.

[ryanmma100]

Tell your gf you will do it but secretly text her anyway

[Rouhanibrah]

threesome

during the threesome you cum on your GF's face to show how much you love her more