Can men and women be just friends?

[TheJizzler]

Most women i've dated with guy friends pretty much forget about them when I come into the picture and rarely spend time with them.
Either way, I've always met them,

If she keeps these guys on active duty and she's taking advantage of them then she is not GF material or a good person so I wouldn't date her for long.

Also, if a woman tells me "he's just a friend" I make sure to ask if he is an "ex's" or if she's kissed / done anything sexual with them.
If the answer is "yes" then I walk because that's a huge lie in my book.
Unless she is really hot & I want to smash.
But I won't get serious with her.

^ all this

[Fielder]

There are 3 girls in my motorbike club, All great mates. Would NEVER even think about doing things with them because i'm not attracted to them. I'm great friends with some of my friends girlfriends too.

A better question is "can a man and woman be BEST friends / friends that hang out 1 on 1"

In which case. No. In that case at least someone is getting there feelings hurt. You cant spend THAT much time together without there being some kind of sexual tension.

[Wilmega]

No - if the girl is attractive I will almost surely want to bang them. With my female friends..i talk to the attractive ones the most lol

[naomi001]

Imo/experience

Ideally: Yes

Realistically: No

I had some guys, who were supposedly "friends" of mine, but later found out they sabotaged some of my relationships...
happened more than once too (no cocky)

[Hankey89]

I would have to say no... Girls or guys might say, but I have friends from opposite sex etc etc but I always feel like one of the parties is attracted to the other, broke up with my ex because she had to many guy "mates"

[DarkOmen]

Imo/experience

Ideally: Yes

Realistically: No

I had some guys, who were supposedly "friends" of mine, but later found out they sabotaged some of my relationships...
happened more than once too (no cocky)

Inb4 sabotage = you having sex with them.

Yeah they really sabotaged your relationships lol

[HeliBrah]

There are 3 girls in my motorbike club, All great mates. Would NEVER even think about doing things with them because i'm not attracted to them. I'm great friends with some of my friends girlfriends too.

A better question is "can a man and woman be BEST friends / friends that hang out 1 on 1"

In which case. No. In that case at least someone is getting there feelings hurt. You cant spend THAT much time together without there being some kind of sexual tension.

I think that should be the definition for this thread, because too many people say "yea, we're friends", but never meet 1 on 1.

I have guy friends who are not my BEST friends, but I can do things with them 1 on 1. If you can't do that with a woman, then its not really about the distinction between friends and best friends, its a distinction between friends and acquaintance.

[naomi001]

Inb4 sabotage = you having sex with them.

Yeah they really sabotaged your relationships lol

lol

I never had sex with them!

Guy friends, were always just that, friends! srs

One particular "friend", called a guy I was dating (who I was hoping to turn into bf lol), and told him lies and chit, long story short, chit went downhill from there.

He's done something similar, to another guy I was getting to know and also tried to break me up with one of my bf-but coudn't -srs

we had mutual friends and so they called him out on it, as it became obvi to them. so I'm not crazy!



Any other girls have a similar exp??

[Arathor]

So since many people think that men and women can't be friends, how do you guys deal with your gf having a few guy friends??

I would want to meet them before I make any decisions, if they are either gay or obvious betas I wouldn't care, but if they are attractive or confident/funny then I would give her an ultimatum.

Some call it insecurity, I call it cutting my losses. Nothing good will ever come of being in a relationship with a girl who has other options that she regularly spends time with.

[naomi001]

lmao

[Isabeli]

There are 3 girls in my motorbike club, All great mates. Would NEVER even think about doing things with them because i'm not attracted to them. I'm great friends with some of my friends girlfriends too.

A better question is "can a man and woman be BEST friends / friends that hang out 1 on 1"

In which case. No. In that case at least someone is getting there feelings hurt. You cant spend THAT much time together without there being some kind of sexual tension.

Even if a man and a woman who are best friends have sex....they're still friends.
What else would they be?...sex does not mean people are together or are even dating...aside from lust...there isn't much else involved in many cases.

[HeliBrah]

lol

I never had sex with them!

Guy friends, were always just that, friends! srs

One particular "friend", called a guy I was dating (who I was hoping to turn into bf lol), and told him lies and chit, long story short, chit went downhill from there.

He's done something similar, to another guy I was getting to know and also tried to break me up with one of my bf-but coudn't -srs

we had mutual friends and so they called him out on it, as it became obvi to them. so I'm not crazy!



Any other girls have a similar exp??

You are dumb as fuk. You were never friends, you friendzoned him. He tried to crawl out of it. He failed. Thats what really happened.

And the saddest part is, consciously or subconsciously you were aware of all of this and enjoyed the drama, because women think its the spice of life and would love their lives to be just a tiny tiny bit like a retarded soap opera.

[naomi001]

You are dumb as fuk. You were never friends, you friendzoned him. He tried to crawl out of it. He failed. Thats what really happened.

And the saddest part is, consciously or subconsciously you were aware of all of this and enjoyed the drama, because women think its the spice of life and would love their lives to be just a tiny tiny bit like a retarded soap opera.

lol...why am i dumb as fuk!

I disagree with you, because I made myself clear to him from the beginning, that a guy friend will always be a guy friend, so he knew that.(no cocky) because I respect friendships.

I never flirted with him, or was flashy in front of him in any way srs.

I respected him, like a brother.. and he knew that, that's what made it phucked up

Edit: plus I always brought my bf with me, when this so called friend was around

[Hankey89]

You are dumb as fuk. You were never friends, you friendzoned him. He tried to crawl out of it. He failed. Thats what really happened.

And the saddest part is, consciously or subconsciously you were aware of all of this and enjoyed the drama, because women think its the spice of life and would love their lives to be just a tiny tiny bit like a retarded soap opera.

This is so ****ing true, this is why you see so many women in relationships have male friends, but rarely guys in relationships have female friends... because sloots need male attention, need feel wanted, whores.

[Arathor]

lol...why am i dumb as fuk!

I disagree with you, because I made myself clear to him from the beginning, that a guy friend will always be a guy friend, so he knew that.(no cocky) because I respect friendships.

I never flirted with him, or was flashy in front of him in any way srs.

I respected him, like a brother.. and he knew that, that's what made it phucked up

You just admitted you friendzoned him...

[naomi001]

You just admitted you friendzoned him...

I don't get it...Well, I genuinely considered him my friend. Plus, he never told me anything otherwise....

maybe I missed your point, can you specify what you mean?

[TheJizzler]

Even if a man and a woman who are best friends have sex....they're still friends.
What else would they be?...sex does not mean people are together or are even dating...aside from lust...there isn't much else involved.

GTFO of this thread with your inferior logic (srs)

[InfinityThor]

Neither, you are lying if you tell me that the FIRST thing that gets you interested in even interacting with a girl isnt the motive to **** her. Im not saying sex is the only thing they offer, im saying that if you spend time with a girl you EITHER want to just **** her och actually like her for real and want to have a relationship with her in which case you will also **** her, so conclusion is that a guy is only "friends" with a girl cause of sexual motive.

We're going to need to simply disagree here.

I initiate interaction with girls on a daily basis that I have absolutely ZERO intention of sleeping with. You need to open yourself up to all experiences because you never know what will come of it.

2-3 years ago though I would have agreed with you and I do believe that's how it goes for the [very] large majority.

[LikeAMachine]

If there is any attraction from the male.

It’s not possible.


Most of my best friends are females. If I were attracted to them, at all it would probably be a different story.

[UgotItbad]

I think that as you get older and mature, the definition of "friends" change a bit. Sure when you're younger you're friends with all sorts of people, but you're also constantly meeting new people and never give much thought to it. When you get older, you have your friends that you've known for a long time and your close with, kicking it with mainly those people... those are your friends.

Sure, male and females can be acquaintances, however I don't think that they can be friends in the sense of one on one hanging out and txting/talking all the time without attraction on one or both sides.

There is a BIG difference between being an acquaintance and being a friend. If you don't know this, you've still got a lot of growing to do.

[HeliBrah]

If there is any attraction from the male.

It’s not possible.


Most of my best friends are females. If I were attracted to them, at all it would probably be a different story.

You hang out with them 1-on-1 regularly? And none of them wants you?

[naomi001]

I think that as you get older and mature, the definition of "friends" change a bit. Sure when you're younger you're friends with all sorts of people, but you're also constantly meeting new people and never give much thought to it. When you get older, you have your friends that you've known for a long time and your close with, kicking it with mainly those people... those are your friends.

Sure, male and females can be acquaintances, however I don't think that they can be friends in the sense of one on one hanging out and txting/talking all the time without attraction on one or both sides.

There is a BIG difference between being an acquaintance and being a friend. If you don't know this, you've still got a lot of growing to do.

I agree, and I like how you put that.

I tried to prove to myself otherwise, but the bottom line is that ..men and women can't be friends, but can be acquaintances.

[naomi001]

You hang out with them 1-on-1 regularly? And none of them wants you?

This is why they can't be friends.

imo, most girls don't wonder this, about a friendship

not blaming men here, but some men thinking this way, is why i feel it's not possible.

[HeliBrah]

This is why they can't be friends.

imo, most girls don't wonder this, about a friendship

not blaming men here, but some men thinking this way, is why i feel it's not possible.

No! If he replies that he meets up with some of them 1-on-1 on the regular and he sees no indicators of the girls he is friends with being interested in him beyond platonic friendship, then I will accept his view.

But I doubt thats the case.

In the meantime, I ring up my buddies (not even best friends, just buddies) and meet 1-on-1 to grab a bite, go to a bar after work or go see a game.

[ComputerHabit]

The first thing a guy does when even looking at a female is to determine if they are HOT and if they might be able to score. We can't help that. It's built-in to our genetic code.

[lightlyfried]

Its not possible if shes hot, i have girls friends but i wouldn't bone them friends or not

[airmansprincess]

and all this 'logic' is exactly why you ALL have maturing to do. My best friend met me and my husband after we were married, never ever has there been any chance of anything more then friendship, and we are really good friends. As well as I have a handfu of other guy friends, all also married and I know and am friends ith their wives as well, but hang out with the guys more, because frankly I'd rather play dungeons and dragons, video games, go to the gym, go shooting and talk music then bake cookies, do crafts and gossip. LOL! So yea, I get along much better with the guys in our group of friends then the girls.

[HeliBrah]

and all this 'logic' is exactly why you ALL have maturing to do. My best friend met me and my husband after we were married, never ever has there been any chance of anything more then friendship, and we are really good friends. As well as I have a handfu of other guy friends, all also married and I know and am friends ith their wives as well, but hang out with the guys more, because frankly I'd rather play dungeons and dragons, video games, go to the gym, go shooting and talk music then bake cookies, do crafts and gossip. LOL! So yea, I get along much better with the guys in our group of friends then the girls.

With how many of them do you meet up 1-on-1 more than 3-4 times per month?

[LikeAMachine]

You hang out with them 1-on-1 regularly? And none of them wants you?

Yeah, one of them gave me a beej when I got drunk once.

Other than that I’m not aware that any of them want me, or at least they don’t show it.

[HeliBrah]

Yeah, one of them gave me a beej when I got drunk once.

lulz - I got acquaintances that say they are friends with me, but really just don't know how to get out of the friendzone. And they are the type who give you BJ's when you are drunk. They are also the ones who go "OH NOOOO" when I say on nights out in group settings, that I don't drink that night. Co-incidence? I think not.