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    Eating Disorder but want to exercise still

    I tried making this post yesterday but it got removed for some reason but I finally have the nerve to share my story. I am 6 foot 2, 18 year old male, who currently weighs 130 pounds. When I was in elementary school, I was incredibly active and did tons of sports but was basically a twig. Everyone told me how skinny I was and how I needed to put some meat on my bones. During high school, i remained quite active with sports and what not till about grade 10. The one problem is I was always a terrible eater. Throughout my childhood, all i ever ate was junk food yet I still remained super skinny. I consumed so much bad food on a daily basis that it was not funny. I started to put on weight in grade 11 at age 16 when the sports stopped so I weighed 180 at 5 11. Everyone kept telling me I was super skinny still as I looked that way from the outside but I had no muscle and just a lot of fat. I began to get hungry all the time and stuffed myself with bad food until I was 6 foot 1 and 210 pounds getting no exercise. I realized I needed to change so I started a diet and ran every day for an hour. I went down to 150 pounds this past April and it was pretty drastic as I became compulsive in terms of running every day and not eating any junk whatsoever. But I went through binging and purging as well. Anyways, at 150 pounds, I felt skinny fat with a skinny frame and lots of fat but no muscle so I increased cardio to an hour and a half every day and cut more food out till all I was eating was one meal and sometimes it was a box of crackers that I would binge on and then I would not eat for the next couple of days. So here I am at 6 foot 2, 18 years of age and 130 pounds. I want to build muscle so I have now running an hour and 20 minutes one day and lifting weights the other. I saw a person about an eating disorder which i might have. Parents say I might be anorexic also as I am always cold and my energy levels are really low. I am on a really strict diet but am trying to consume lots of protein. Nutritionist says I shouldn't exercise at all because I might risk my heart failing or something but I want to stay active and get bigger. I would appreciate all possible advice or skinny fat success stories. Be completely honest and don't hold back anything as this is a really tough time for me so I appreciate any words of wisdom on what I should be doing here. I feel really self conscious about my body and I feel my belly probably about 20 times a day to make sure I don't gain any more belly fat as I feel I have too much. If you could look at these pics (sorry for the bad quality) and assess what you think my body fat percentage is (I think it is dangerously high) and also tell me what I should do. What kind of weight training and cardio do I require. Heavy weights with low reps is what I hear works best. I want to know mainly what you guys think of my skinny fat body and how it can be fixed.
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    Registered User mainsqueeze530's Avatar
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    You see something way different than others see. You are definitely anorexic and you're putting your life at risk with your condition, especially running over an hour everyday. DO NOT run like that anymore, you will literally drop dead id you keep that up. Food is GOOD brah, it helps your body, it doesn't make you fat.

    Watch Pete's inspirational video, he was in a VERY similar situation as you it seems:

    youtube.com/watch?v=XvILb8psZpM
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  3. #3
    Like I said, we hongry Verint's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JasonClark27 View Post
    I tried making this post yesterday but it got removed for some reason but I finally have the nerve to share my story. I am 6 foot 2, 18 year old male, who currently weighs 130 pounds. When I was in elementary school, I was incredibly active and did tons of sports but was basically a twig. Everyone told me how skinny I was and how I needed to put some meat on my bones. During high school, i remained quite active with sports and what not till about grade 10. The one problem is I was always a terrible eater. Throughout my childhood, all i ever ate was junk food yet I still remained super skinny. I consumed so much bad food on a daily basis that it was not funny. I started to put on weight in grade 11 at age 16 when the sports stopped so I weighed 180 at 5 11. Everyone kept telling me I was super skinny still as I looked that way from the outside but I had no muscle and just a lot of fat. I began to get hungry all the time and stuffed myself with bad food until I was 6 foot 1 and 210 pounds getting no exercise. I realized I needed to change so I started a diet and ran every day for an hour. I went down to 150 pounds this past April and it was pretty drastic as I became compulsive in terms of running every day and not eating any junk whatsoever. But I went through binging and purging as well. Anyways, at 150 pounds, I felt skinny fat with a skinny frame and lots of fat but no muscle so I increased cardio to an hour and a half every day and cut more food out till all I was eating was one meal and sometimes it was a box of crackers that I would binge on and then I would not eat for the next couple of days. So here I am at 6 foot 2, 18 years of age and 130 pounds. I want to build muscle so I have now running an hour and 20 minutes one day and lifting weights the other. I saw a person about an eating disorder which i might have. Parents say I might be anorexic also as I am always cold and my energy levels are really low. I am on a really strict diet but am trying to consume lots of protein. Nutritionist says I shouldn't exercise at all because I might risk my heart failing or something but I want to stay active and get bigger. I would appreciate all possible advice or skinny fat success stories. Be completely honest and don't hold back anything as this is a really tough time for me so I appreciate any words of wisdom on what I should be doing here. I feel really self conscious about my body and I feel my belly probably about 20 times a day to make sure I don't gain any more belly fat as I feel I have too much. If you could look at these pics (sorry for the bad quality) and assess what you think my body fat percentage is (I think it is dangerously high) and also tell me what I should do. What kind of weight training and cardio do I require. Heavy weights with low reps is what I hear works best. I want to know mainly what you guys think of my skinny fat body and how it can be fixed.
    This, and everything else in this post is very worrying.
    There is nothing that will benefit you more right now than going to a psychiatrist that specializes in eating disorders, and also urgent medical care at a hospital.
    Please get professional help from a psychiatrist and a hospital as soon as possible. You are literally putting your own life at risk right now.
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    Registered User texicus's Avatar
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    hey bud

    your post is really worrying and if you are at a college or university i'd encourage you to seek help through their counseling system, the only thing you should be worrying about is getting stronger and healthier as you are dangerously underweight and emaciated right now. go look at some of the logs in here and look at how much better guys look and feel after they start eating properly and getting stronger. best of luck, post in the ED support thread if you have more questions
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    Originally Posted by JasonClark27 View Post
    assess what you think my body fat percentage is (I think it is dangerously high) and also tell me what I should do.
    Two of the images you attached:






    You need to meet with a psychiatrist that specializes in eating disorders and you need to do so immediately.

    You have a BMI of 16.7 and you're at significant risk for acute health issues. Please seek help ASAP!!!
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    Originally Posted by WonderPug View Post
    Two of the images you attached:






    You need to meet with a psychiatrist that specializes in eating disorders and you need to do so immediately.

    You have a BMI of 16.7 and you're at significant risk for acute health issues. Please seek help ASAP!!!
    #fuknamen to this. OP get help, if you dont, your going to be forever dumb. stay out of the GYM btw.
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    Please get professional help OP. It actually physically hurts me to look at your pics. You have an extreme eating disorder or body dysmorphic disorder and need to make an appointment with a specialist immediately.
    Last edited by Tupperwolf; 12-05-2012 at 01:20 PM.
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    Originally Posted by MAX.MAREK View Post
    #fuknamen to this. OP get help, if you dont, your going to be forever dumb. stay out of the GYM btw.
    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    Oh what in the god damn fuk.

    Just.. fuk..

    Make yourself eat a surplus and workout, no matter if you lose definition it doesn't matter, losing fat is super easy. I went from morbidly obese to normal BMI in 8 months, worst you can do is lose some definition leaving you with 3 months max of cutting... (And that's if you got puffy as fuk)
    lol please never respond to an eating disorder post again, srs
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    Registered User texicus's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    Sorry I wasn't gentle enough. Go cry about it somewhere else.
    I'm not crying, this kid is obviously experiencing extreme body dysmorphia and being a massive d ick to him isn't doing him any good and just makes you look like you don't know what you're talking about, which unless you have experienced a similar ED or BDD (I have, both of them) you don't
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    It's really simple

    1) Lift weights
    2) Eat
    3) No extended periods of cardio, if you want to do a few sprints after your workout (no more than 10 minutes) that's fine.
    4) Eat

    Take this advice^.
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    Sorry I wasn't gentle enough. Go cry about it somewhere else.
    This thread is too serious for nonsense.

    The OP has a serious medical condition; one that could be life threatening if not treated.




    OP: When you look in the mirror, you see excessive body fat. But that's not true. How you perceive what you see is a symptom of your disease. What is true is that you have acutely deficient levels of body fat and of lean body mass.

    You need to seek treatment and you need to do it immediately. You're young and can have a wonderful, healthy life if you take the steps necessary to recover from your disorder. Be courageous and do the right thing. Make an appointment immediately to meet with a psychiatrist that specializes in eating disorders.
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    I can't fathom how someone can view their body as different from what it is.

    You see object A in the mirror, you're looking at object A still, not object B. You see object A still because the mirror hasn't changed anything. It's a fuking mirror.

    I can't fathom how OP sees a fat guy in the mirror because it's simply not the case, that's like looking up at the blue sky and seeing the color green with trees instead of clouds, it's simply doesn't exist.

    That's why I'm being hard on him because he needs to snap the **** out of it and realize gaining a bit of weight isn't a big deal at all and is easy as hell to lose. Do you realize how fukking small and insignificant we are in this universe? Stop fuking ruining your life and being such a sad sap and EAT.

    I don't need to be all emotional and depressed because some guy has severe mental issues that are, quite frankly, ridiculous.

    inb4banned
    I've to say. I'm really happy with my LBM gains after my bulk and I'll look solid after my cut. Gaining LBM is definitely easy, so is cutting fat. It's all pretty easy actually. Has to be them noobie gains. But still, OP, you can manipulate your body so easily, stop stressing brah, just chill out and be smart about it.

    Step 1:
    Build a frame

    Step 2:
    Sculpt the frame (strip the fat)

    You skipped step 1 brah.... OP. So get to it. Think long-term, you're young. And enjoy yourself no matter what you look like, just know you're working at improving yourself and that's a good thing.
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    Moore's starting reps: 3607

    Seriously though brah... You're in the wrong on this one. It's not going to be as simple as "just eat" and there isn't much advice we can give that is going to make sense. The OP needs professional help with a specialist. As WonderPug said the OP's condition could be life threatening.

    To the OP: You are sick, but there is a cure. You have already taken the first step, which is to come here and share your story and your photos with us. That's incredibly courageous! The second step, as previously posted, is to make an appointment with a specialist immediately.
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    ^^^ I'm astonished by your posts in this thread. You should be ashamed of yourself. Seriously.

    Do you say these same words to cancer patients? To those in congestive heart failure? To victims of stroke?
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    I'm not wrong unless his brain LITERALLY fires differently than a normal person and has no ability to create rational thought.

    Because if you put things together like being able to see the entire rib cage, squares off shoulders, how skinny the arms are in comparison to size of hands, etc, ANYBODY with a NORMAL HEALTHY THOUGHT PROCESS can see that you are too skinny.

    I just can't comprehend how anyone's brain can work differently, because we're all human.

    If you can do 25x5 and come to 125 then your brain in the same as mine and you should have no difficulty seeing that you're too skinny.

    I'm raging at the thought that anyone can't see this.
    Well he's probably obsessive about the tiny tiny tiny amount of fat (the CRITICAL amount of fat that any human being NEEDS to survive, btw, if you're reading this OP) he does have and is blowing it out of proportion. Which is understandable, people tend to blow things out of proportion a lot.

    For instance, someone pressured by their parents to do well in school may start freaking out when getting a B or C instead of an A. When it's really not bad.
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    Don't rage. He needs support. To be honest he needs the support of the other people on this board that have suffered from an eating disorder. I don't think you understand what it is. I can't say that I fully comprehend what having one is like, but I've lurked in the eating disorder thread.
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    I'm not wrong unless his brain LITERALLY fires differently than a normal person and has no ability to create rational thought.
    Exactly what happens with these kinds of disorders. Do you think a rationally thinking person would look at that body and see high BF?

    OP: Please get professional help, very few people here know what you are going through, I know I don't. You need to see a specialist who can relate.
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    Sorry, I'm not emo, so no, I'm not ashamed of myself.

    I think with logic and reason.

    If OP reads what I said and realizes it for himself, good.
    If OP reads what I said and still doesn't get it, then he has a mental deficiency. In which case I WOULD recommend a specialist.

    But until then, no conclusions.
    You're being a douche. Tempted
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    I can't fathom how someone can view their body as different from what it is.

    You see object A in the mirror, you're looking at object A still, not object B. You see object A still because the mirror hasn't changed anything. It's a fuking mirror.

    I can't fathom how OP sees a fat guy in the mirror because it's simply not the case, that's like looking up at the blue sky and seeing the color green with trees instead of clouds, it's simply doesn't exist.

    That's why I'm being hard on him because he needs to snap the **** out of it and realize gaining a bit of weight isn't a big deal at all and is easy as hell to lose. Do you realize how fukking small and insignificant we are in this universe? Stop fuking ruining your life and being such a sad sap and EAT.

    I don't need to be all emotional and depressed because some guy has severe mental issues that are, quite frankly, ridiculous. This world ain't all sunshine and rainbows and if you're going to starve yourself because you think you're fat... well... maybe I suggest you look at your body's shape instead of the fat on it. You can see your rib cage shape bro.

    Look at your shoulders how they aren't round, but are squared off. This is not a normal physique. If you think you're fat after seeing simple bodily shapes I don't know what to tell you.

    inb4banned
    It's pretty difficult to understand if you have never experienced this before. Tough love is NOT the answer here. If you do not have any experience with eating disorders and know nothing about the psychology of them (which is clearly the case), you're the last person who should be offering advice. Common sense should tell you that. It's considered a disease for a reason.

    I had / have BDD too...I saw myself as fat and ugly when I was skinny. I was so used to thinking of myself that way that I literally saw that in the mirror. All I could see was the excess fat on my body. Thought people were being nice when they commented on how thin I was or crazy when they warned I was getting too skinny. You can not fully understand unless it has happened to you.

    I love you Moore...but you're wrong. srs
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    ITT: Everyone telling me I'm being a douche with no argument other than name calling.



    Tempted to what? Neg me? Go ahead, it's a forum. Nothing of value was lost.

    Honestly even if I was banned what would I lose? Being able to update my log and talking to a few people I don't even know? lol
    You are insulting someone with a serious medical and psychological issues Thats the definition of a douche
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    Honestly even if I was banned what would I lose? Being able to update my log and talking to a few people I don't even know? lol
    Aww you don't mean that... :P
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    Originally Posted by justanothagirl View Post
    Aww you don't mean that... :P
    While it would slightly bother me, I'm serious about the fact that it's not a big deal. I'd get over it very, very quickly.
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    I'm not wrong unless his brain LITERALLY fires differently than a normal person and has no ability to create rational thought.
    cognitive neuroscience major here at the best pre med school in the country

    I can confirm that his brain does not fire differently but rather his psyche perceives things differently than someone without an eating disorder or body dismorphia. He can obviously create rational thought because he strung together his original post.

    edit:
    thanks for deleting moore
    Last edited by texicus; 12-05-2012 at 02:29 PM.
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    Bro first of all phuck what everyone says about you man. Don't listen to those fukin **** heads that make fun of you for being too skinny or fat. They can go fuk themselves. That being said...

    ....you need to start eating man. Just start off with pasta, chicken, potatoes, hamburger, anything to get your weight where it needs to be. Anything with high amounts of calories or carbs but keep it healthy. You need to stop running at that weight before you pass out on the street one day and seriously hurt yourself. I wouldn't worry about lifting any weights at all until you have your diet under control and your weight up at least 20 lbs. Just eat bro that's all you have to tell yourself for now and don't listen to any fukin ******* that tries to put you down.
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    Originally Posted by moore93 View Post
    Sorry, I'm not emo, so no, I'm not ashamed of myself.

    I think with logic and reason.

    If OP reads what I said and realizes it for himself, good.
    If OP reads what I said and still doesn't get it, then he has a mental deficiency. In which case I WOULD recommend a specialist.

    But until then, no conclusions.
    It's pretty obvious that anorexia is a mental illness too, being extremely harsh isn't just going to just make him snap out of it. Anorexia is an extreme form of anxiety and what you're saying could make his situation worse and put him into a deeper state of anxiety.

    You clearly don't think with logic and reason.
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    I'm deleting all of my posts, not because I think I'm wrong, but I'm just wasting my time with something that has very little or nothing to do with my life.

    I will leave this however. Perhaps you should try to look at your body in shapes instead of how fat you are. Look at your rib cage, how big your hands are in comparison to your arms, how squared off your shoulders are, etc. Then look at someone with a lot of meat on their bones. Note the differences and make it your goal to achieve that.
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    I'd say it's about time to bulk...

    On a serious note, chances are you are doing permanent damage to your brain, heart, HPTA etc. You could end up on hormone treatments for life. There are easier and healthier ways to control your weight. You could probably still get out of that situation with no permanent damage if you take action. You will find that it wont be as easy to gain weight as you thought it would.
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    Originally Posted by Brandon0212 View Post
    Bro first of all phuck what everyone says about you man. Don't listen to those fukin **** heads that make fun of you for being too skinny or fat. They can go fuk themselves. That being said...

    ....you need to start eating man. Just start off with pasta, chicken, potatoes, hamburger, anything to get your weight where it needs to be. Anything with high amounts of calories or carbs but keep it healthy. You need to stop running at that weight before you pass out on the street one day and seriously hurt yourself. I wouldn't worry about lifting any weights at all until you have your diet under control and your weight up at least 20 lbs. Just eat bro that's all you have to tell yourself for now and don't listen to any fukin ******* that tries to put you down.
    I disagree, picking up a few weights while giving his body the nutrition it needs to recover and gain weight won't hurt. Maybe do it under supervision/ with guidance of a professional to make sure you don't overdo it and your heart can handle it. Slowly build upto it. He needs to gain quality mass, not just fat, because that's not what he wants. If he doesn't mind, then ok. But I think he'd feel better adding quality LBM.

    Originally Posted by stratoo View Post
    I'd say it's about time to bulk...

    On a serious note, chances are you are doing permanent damage to your brain, heart, HPTA etc. You could end up on hormone treatments for life. There are easier and healthier ways to control your weight. You could probably still get out of that situation with no permanent damage if you take action. You will find that it wont be as easy to gain weight as you thought it would.
    Agreed, when you're starving, your body starts using your brain, heart, organs etc. as fuel..... That's not what you want OP.
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    Originally Posted by justanothagirl View Post
    I disagree, picking up a few weights while giving his body the nutrition it needs to recover and gain weight won't hurt. Maybe do it under supervision/ with guidance of a professional to make sure you don't overdo it and your heart can handle it. Slowly build upto it. He needs to gain quality mass, not just fat, because that's not what he wants. If he doesn't mind, then ok. But I think he'd feel better adding quality LBM.


    Agreed, when you're starving, your body starts using your brain, heart, organs etc. as fuel..... That's not what you want OP.
    No offense...but what makes you qualified to disagree with his nutritionist who said his heart could fail if he continues to exercise? He should stick to what real professionals are telling him.
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    Originally Posted by missladyj View Post
    No offense...but what makes you qualified to disagree with his nutritionist who said his heart could fail if he continues to exercise? He should stick to what real professionals are telling him.
    x2, he needs to normalize his hormones, gain some weight etc before he starts lifting or doing any sort of strenuous activity
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