ITT: I post the best copy pasta on the misc right now

[eljobber]

wait for it...



























































What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ****ing dead, kiddo.

[criminal_manne]

no.

phaggot

[troko]

no.

phaggot

[randombrah1]

no.

phaggot

[wheelerx50]

no.

phaggot

[jd2967]

no.

phaggot

[Vbrah]

no.

phaggot

[Rasc170]

no.


pendejo

[Rufflez]

no.

phaggot

[esTHetiks]

no.

phaggot

[Halpin9T4]

no phaggot.

someone neg this phaggot

[HFGL]

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.


pendejo

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

All this

[sippiboy1987]

No.

Phaggot

[Foxy Ronnie]

no.

phaggot.

[Nathan17]

pls

[WheyTooDiesel]

oN

toggahP

[mrkdrt]

no thanks jeff LOL

[builder89]

chain breakers sure do rustle my jimmies

[Grooma]

wat

[cheekzzz]

yes
phaggot

[54m0n6]

no phaggetron

[bigben2121]

no.

cock master

[belmont316]

no phaggot

[SMASHgym]

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no.


pendejo

no.

phaggot

no.

phaggot

no phaggot.

someone neg this phaggot

All this

No.

Phaggot

no.

phaggot.

no phaggetron

no.

cock master

^^^

[4ToTheFloor]

No.

Homosexual

[belmont316]

Met this chick in senior year of HS, dated for awhile and got into a relationship....Had a son (She said she was on point with birth control, I went raw and....yeah..), we were both doing pretty good in the relationship for a few years. Both of us didn't go to college, she got a job as a secretary for her mothers friends dental office, we move in together.. My friend calls me up one day and says he just saw my girl at some dudes house (This dude lives a few houses down from my friend), and they were kissing in the driveway before she left.. That sh!t made me rage. Real bad. But I kept my cool for a few weeks and told my friend to keep an eye on the house, he called me a few times and told me shes always at his house when shes supposed to be at work. And in between picking up our son from her mothers house, she visits him and leaves son in the car and goes in by herself.

By this time, I KNOW shes cheating, and I'm pissed off that she put my son in that position, so close to it, I'm at home and I get off the phone JUST as she enters the door. I say "Hey where you been?", her response, "Oh I was talking to my mom for awhile and gave Andrew (Our son) a bath and he fell asleep so I hung out with her for a bit", LOL IM SURE B!TCH. I played it off and held my rage inside. I told her cool, and we went on with our day, I had sex with her later that night and she was telling me "Ohhh I love you" blah blah blah, in my mind I felt like bashing her head into the wall and killing her.

The next day, she goes out and goes to work (lulz i bet), I call up her work just to be sure, surprisingly, shes at work, we talk a bit and I pretended like I had to ask her a few things about our rent, she says shes gonna be on break in a few minutes and has to go, I tell her "Hey come home and lets have a quickie", she laughed and said shes gonna go to lunch with her friends...

I hung up, started eating food, it was a cheat day for me so I was nom noming on Mexican food, had a big ass bowl of rice, beans, chicken. 2 spicy ass burritos, and I ended up eating a bag of hot cheeto's after (gg binge eating)...

After my lunch, my friend called me and told me "Ay, shes at his house right now", I calmly responded "Aiight man, thanks" he said "What are you gonna do bro?", I told him don't worry, and hung up..

I packed all of her sh!t, and in the last suitcase I put her panties in it because I couldn't fit all her clothes in the other one, so I stuffed her panties and bra's in that suitcase, started zipping it up, and felt my stomach growl and my ass tingle, seriously, I felt like collapsing then and there. She had this picture of her and her mom in a frame and I grabbed it and threw it in the suitcase, and just before zipping it shut, I got a brilliant idea, I unzipped her suitcase, and just unloaded this huge pile of sh!t into it, good god was it a marvelous sh!t, it stunk SOOOOOOOO fAWKING BAD, I'm serious, this thing was deadly, and it just kept coming out, atleast 4 HUGE pieces of turd, and then brown liquid and small chunks of shyt ALL in her suitcase.. I bent over and unzipped the other suitcase, took our her shirt and wiped my ass with it, I also had to take a piss right about now, so I unzipped the other suitcase and pissed all over it and threw the sh!tstained shirt in it. Zipped everything back up, drove it to the house where she was at, my friend came out and he helped me put her suitcases beside her car, and that was that.

I get a call about 20 minutes later, and right as I answer it, I swear to you all I heard was "ARRRRRRGHHGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!", she went completely BERSERK over the phone, for about 10 minutes she was completely ape-sh!t(lulz), I just calmly listened, I didn't say anything until I was sure she got tired of raging. She quieted down and started crying over the phone, and I told her "I've known about what you've been doing for a few weeks now, I'm sorry we couldn't make this relationship work, if not for us, for Andrew, you destroyed something which was good, you destroyed something you are supposed to cherish, I am in no way angered with you, I'm angered by your stupidity, your stupidity of thinking that I would not find out and take a huge sh!t all over you for underestimating me, I am a beast. Thought you knew?", and hung up.

She moved back to her Mom's house, and kept my son away from me for a few months, during this time, she got fired from her job because of skipping work so much (To go get fukked by the other dude), she hit me up for child support. Bleh, what can I do? The dumb bish lost her job, destroyed her relationship, and now I gotta pay her for her mistakes. I started paying child support, but during this, I started investigating her on the low, I found out that she became addicted to popping ex pills and snorting coke, she smoked weed/drank very liberally too. I started gathering up evidence, I had my friends she didn't really know too well (Who were friends of her friends) get high with her and take pictures, pictures of her snorting up lines, getting high, popping ex pills, etc etc etc, videos of her doing these things also. I also now had testimony's from my friends to take her to court and prove to them that she was unfit to have custody of my children.

I did so, I got 100% custody of my son, and the judge sent her to drug and alcohol counseling, because of my actions of taking MY son away from her, she lost child support (her only source of income to spend on drugs/partying/clothes), she fell into depression, her mom called me and cussed me out for destroying her daughters life. I laughed.

During this whole fiasco, did I tell you guys I also had sex with her aunt and sister? Yeah, during our little court drama I had my d!ck all in her freshly turned 18 year old sisters mouth, I fukced her sister one day and a few hours later took her aunt out to the movies and fukced her in my car and got the most mind numbing blow job while I was on the freeway. Good times.

Anyways, I hear from friends that she started stripping and selling meth for money. Once again, I saw an opportunity to destroy her life some more. I called the police and told them that my sons mother was selling drugs out of her moms house, a few weeks later, she got busted right down the street from her house with an ounce of meth and 300 ecstasy pills in her hoodie, they took her to jail and a few days later called me, crying and begging to get her out ( her mom is a single mother too, and is broke as hell lol ), and was begging to talk to MY son.

I told her NO I'm not going to bail her out, NO she can't talk to my son. She cried like she never cried before, during this, I decided to tell her about the time I fukced her sister and had my d!ck all in her mouth, I told her about the time I handcuffed her sister to my bed and fukced her brains out, then about the times I fukced her aunt. I told her that her sister's pussie is much better than hers, and her aunt isn't all that bad too. She started crying even more, I hung up and went on with my day.

Last I heard of her she was out of jail and still living with her mom and tried to commit suicide a few times. The guy she was fukcing behind my back didn't help her at all with anything.


Currently I live with my new Woman, shes nothing like my ex, she enjoys hanging out with my son and treats him like her son, and her reputation is pretty good, no negative stories about her.

It feels good man, it felt good to see her suffer in pain, and it feels good to know currently she is still suffering, I hope she suffers until shes an old lady and realizes that I could've been the best thing to ever happen to her, we could've had a nice family and a nice home, and a good life. And that she ruined it all when she fukced with me. I hope when shes an old lady realizing all of this, she also realizes how I strategically destroyed her life and how she fukced up and lost her son, how her son never talks about her anymore, how her son never asks about her anymore, how her son has such a good relationship with my current Woman. I hope when she dies my son doesn't go to her funeral.