Got jumped after trying to educate a christian girl at a party

[calbaisey]

Was at a house party with two friends, had a good time drinking and saw a white girl with big ol' booty usually seen only on ethnics. She was wearing a short dress that reach just below her ass and was struggling to maintain its position below those beautiful globes. Anyways I am tryna holla at this hoe and some guy who knew who she was told me she was a devout christian who was a "virgin" because she only gave bjs and anal.

In the super drunk state I was in I went up to her and introduce myself:

Me: hey Sally, right? I heard you are cool but a little strict on religion
Sally: *giggling* No i am not! Who told you that?
Me: you don't have to worry about that but I wanna know how can a beauty such as yourself believe in such fairytales? (yes whiteknighting)
Sally: Fairytales? *laughing*, it has been proven that the world could not have been created without a powerful being ... (blah blah religious bs)

I was getting bored so interrupted her while she was explaining her logic and this is where things took a bad turn.

Me: You know you are not a virgin if you give up your bootyhole instead of vagina right?

I was drunk as **** brahs and she just scrunched up her face and told me i was weird and walked away from me. I knew people around me were watching and heard them laughing, I was utterly humiliated at the fail and was tryna redeem myself, I saw her sexy ass wobbling away as she walked away from me and was about to take the loss. However, I got an idea after I remembered near the fireplace there was a book rack where a bible was among the book collection. I figured I could rescue myself from the situation by feeling on her booty while mocking her so it would be a win-win for me in front of the crowd while satisfying my perverted desires.

I grabbed the bible off the rack and crept up behind Sally and grabbed her by the waist and lift her dress above her ass, she screamed and I shoved the bible up between her buttcheeks as hard as I could. She screamed loudly while I shouted over her to make her hear me and continued to thrust it up there.

Me: Ask your god to stop me desecrating his holy book!!!
Sally: GET THE **** OFF ME!!!! LET ME GO!!!!
Random girl sally was chatting too: DUDE GET YOURS HANDS OFF HER!
Me: ASK YOUR GOD IF YOU ARE STILL A VIRGIN BITCH!!!!
Random skinny gay guy: What the **** is going? (while laughing)

I then heard one guy shout "You ****ing sick pervert" and as he landed his punch on my face I felt more punches and kicks all over my body. I am at home all swelled up and have no idea how I got home. I tried calling friends but no one is answering. Shall I apologize to Sally? Did I deserve such a beating?

[Sookram]

stay safe

[scarboro]

no srs tag
tl;dr
dear diary
etc

[Nickkkkk001]

stay safe

[theyseeme]

lol'd

[Voecheb]

Ask your god if you are still a version bitch!!!!

[UAzips]

spoon pics of swelling?

[hittman]

fukking versions i swear

[overMotivated]

too late to stay safe

[igohard90]

sally is a kunt so no

[MrSpab]

version

[Skythes]

thats funny op cause last night I was at a house party with two friends, had a good time drinking and saw a white girl with big ol' booty usually seen only on ethnics. She was wearing a short dress that reach just below her ass and was struggling to maintain its position below those beautiful globes. Anyways I am tryna holla at this hoe and some guy who knew who she was told me she was a devout christian who was a "virgin" because she only gave bjs and anal.

In the super drunk state I was in I went up to her and introduce myself:

Me: hey Sally, right? I heard you are cool but a little strict on religion
Sally: *giggling* No i am not! Who told you that?
Me: you don't have to worry about that but I wanna know how can a beauty such as yourself believe in such fairytales? (yes whiteknighting)
Sally: Fairytales? *laughing*, it has been proven that the world could not have been created with a powerful being ... (blah blah religious bs)
Me: You know you are not a virgin if you give up your bootyhole instead of vagina right?

I was drunk as **** brahs and she just scrunched up her face and told me i was weird and walked away from me. I knew people around me were watching and heard them laughing, I was utterly humiliated at the fail and was tryna redeem myself, I saw her sexy ass wobbling away as she walked away from me and was about to take the loss. However, I got an idea after I remembered near the fireplace there was a book rack where a bible was among the book collection. I figured I could rescue myself from the situation by feeling on her booty while mocking her so it would be a win-win for me in front of the crowd while satisfying my perverted desires.

I grabbed the bible off the rack and crept up behind Sally and grabbed her by the waist and lift her dress above her ass, she screamed and I shoved the bible up between her buttcheeks as hard as I could. She screamed loudly while I shouted over her to make her hear me and continued to thrust it up there.

Me: Ask your god to stop me desecrating his holy book!!!
Sally: GET THE **** OFF ME!!!! LET ME GO!!!!
Random girl sally was chatting too: DUDE GET YOURS HANDS OFF HER!
Me: ASK YOUR GOD IF YOU ARE STILL A VERSION BITCH!!!!
Random skinny gay guy: What the **** is going? (while laughing)

I then heard one guy shout "You ****ing sick pervert" and as landed his punch I felt more punches and kicks all over my body. I am at home all swelled up and have no idea how I got home. I tried calling friends but no one is answering. Shall I apologize to Sally? Did I deserve such a beating?

At this point it became a blur as I saw a bunch of fists and foots in my face and I was beaten to the ground.

[YIAMSOMEBODY]

Lulz, this muthafukca said "ethnics". AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

[Sadida76]

cliffs:

"forced" to take my grandfather's M6 to school stop at the mcdonalds I used to work at manager i worked with sees me in the drive thru we hate each other she asks how did I obtain the car I ask for a hamburger, she gives me a hamburger I raise it to my lips and take a bite. My eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs I swallow and look down at the hamburger in my hands. She gives me a hamburger I swallow and look down at the hamburger in my hands. I cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs a pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. She gives me a hamburger I look at her face, and she is pleading with me. The children are crying now I raise the hamburger to my lips, tears stream down my face as I take a bite she gives me a hamburger. I am on my knees.
I plead with her to go across the street. She hears only children's laughter she gives me a hamburger I am screaming as I fall down the stairs. She is my child. I cannot see anything I take a bite of the hamburger the concrete rushes up to meet me I awake with a start in my own bed. My eye twitches involuntarily she gives me a hamburger as I kill her, I do not make a sound she gives me a hamburger...

[CanadaBBOY]

Obvious fake story, BUT, religion is a putrid joke and must be expunged from the earth, so I aplaude the anti-religion aspect of the story.

[gohanbrah]

need cliffs bro
srs

[calbaisey]

Obvious fake story, BUT, religion is a putrid joke and must be expunged from the earth, so I aplaude the anti-religion aspect of the story.

It's not fake bro, I have the **** stained bible in my living room, apparently I was gripping it tight after I was knocked out.

[CanadaBBOY]

It's not fake bro, I have the **** stained bible in my living room, apparently I was gripping it tight after I was knocked out.

Tried repping but maxed out for today. Sexual assault and desecration of religion in one blow is a beautiful thing.

[Smeldtz]

pics of chick or at least your face so i can tell if not bullcrapping

[humblegenius]

You raped her with a book.

Awesome

[DubSilky]

Aware me on the "proof" the bible banger was talkin about

[HeliBrah]

Goes to party

Choses religion as chit-chat topic

Those punches were well deserved, you sound like a major ******* tbh. Get well soon.

[SixpackNick]

Tried repping but maxed out for today. Sexual assault and desecration of religion in one blow is a beautiful thing.

Damn you really are a piece of ****. I mean seriously, you make fun of other people beliefes and for what? Because you dont agree/ can't understand them? I mean the misc is bad sometimes but it is pieces of **** like you that make me lose faith in humanity. Without religion society would have had a much harder time working out, and then there's you, some ass hole kunt piece of **** who is too much of a pussy to say **** in real life only to be persecuted like this kunt was. So you come on here and post with tons of other pussys to make yourself feel better.

Why can't you just shut the fuk up and let people believe what they want in peace? If there's any problem with people and their beliefes it's kunts like you bashing others believing in something you can't comprehend.

Inb4 negs cause *******s like you gonna *******

Sick miscer kunt. You woudnt say this **** about that girl in real life you fukin pussy both you and the op are what degrades society, not religion, fuk you.

[LankedF1braz]

I can confirm this, I was the bible.

[calbaisey]

Damn you really are a piece of ****. I mean seriously, you make fun of other people beliefes and for what? Because you dont agree/ can't understand them? I mean the misc is bad sometimes but it is pieces of **** like you that make me lose faith in humanity. Without religion society would have had a much harder time working out, and then there's you, some ass hole kunt piece of **** who is too much of a pussy to say **** in real life only to be persecuted like this kunt was. So you come on here and post with tons of other pussys to make yourself feel better.

Why can't you just shut the fuk up and let people believe what they want in peace? If there's any problem with people and their beliefes it's kunts like you bashing others believing in something you can't comprehend.

Inb4 negs cause *******s like you gonna *******

Sick miscer kunt. You woudnt say this **** about that girl in real life you fukin pussy both you and the op are what degrades society, not religion, fuk you.

Watch your tone boy, I finna shove a bible up your ass, I done it once and not scared to do it again.

[rraawwss]

Damn you really are a piece of ****. I mean seriously, you make fun of other people beliefes and for what? Because you dont agree/ can't understand them? I mean the misc is bad sometimes but it is pieces of **** like you that make me lose faith in humanity. Without religion society would have had a much harder time working out, and then there's you, some ass hole kunt piece of **** who is too much of a pussy to say **** in real life only to be persecuted like this kunt was. So you come on here and post with tons of other pussys to make yourself feel better.

Why can't you just shut the fuk up and let people believe what they want in peace? If there's any problem with people and their beliefes it's kunts like you bashing others believing in something you can't comprehend.

Inb4 negs cause *******s like you gonna *******

Sick miscer kunt. You woudnt say this **** about that girl in real life you fukin pussy both you and the op are what degrades society, not religion, fuk you.

Religion is cancer, only an unaware idiot like you would be praising religion, you fools that believe in religion are having your energy and power sucked away to entities which put religion among us. You cannot comprehend **** you moron, the draconians laugh in your face at your stupidity whilst they put the truth right in front of it.

[CanadaBBOY]

I speak out on religion because i'm one of the few who DO understand it. Anyone who does understand it does NOT follow it, because they understand it's history, it's writing, and the fact that it is a man-made cult.

Damn you really are a piece of ****. I mean seriously, you make fun of other people beliefes and for what? Because you dont agree/ can't understand them? I mean the misc is bad sometimes but it is pieces of **** like you that make me lose faith in humanity. Without religion society would have had a much harder time working out, and then there's you, some ass hole kunt piece of **** who is too much of a pussy to say **** in real life only to be persecuted like this kunt was. So you come on here and post with tons of other pussys to make yourself feel better.

Why can't you just shut the fuk up and let people believe what they want in peace? If there's any problem with people and their beliefes it's kunts like you bashing others believing in something you can't comprehend.

Inb4 negs cause *******s like you gonna *******

Sick miscer kunt. You woudnt say this **** about that girl in real life you fukin pussy both you and the op are what degrades society, not religion, fuk you.

[CanadaBBOY]

Religion is cancer, only an unaware idiot like you would be praising religion, you fools that believe in religion are having your energy and power sucked away to entities which put religion among us. You cannot comprehend **** you moron, the draconians laugh in your face at your stupidity whilst they put the truth right in front of it.

Well put my man.

The soul of capitalism and modern government is taken from religion, as it has been used countless times throughout human history to exploit and control the masses.

Just learn a few simple facts about a bunch of different religions, and how they are all bad copies of each other, and all man-made, and you realize how much of a scam it is.

The difference between a cult and a religion is that in a cult, the leader/creators are still alive, and in a religion the leader/creators are dead and so no one can "disprove" them, hence the cacophony of religious bull**** flying around the world today.

[thercias]

version checking in

[TheWinrar]

More pertinent question, OP:

"Should I stop creating unfunny, obviously fake troll threads on the misc?"

Post it and I guarantee you'll get a resounding "yes."